I am going to be having surgery on the 29th. I am trying to prepare my 5 year old son for me not being home with him for a couple days. I told him today that I would be staying in the hospital and he said that he wanted to go too. Part of me wants him there but I don't want to add the stress on my parents and husband either.

I wouldn't. there is nothing for him to do and you will be all loopy and poo in pain, he doesn't need to see that. plus if he wants to cuddle, you shouoldn't let him for a day or two, just in case...it would be really hard!

Attempting to be a good mom and prepare him, I warned my son (then 5) before I got my lap band and he fretted like crazy so I ended up not telling him the day I was going to have surgery, my dad picked him up after school and said 'oh btw your mom's doctor decided she needed the surgery early so he went ahead and did it today' and told him I was fine and he was cool with it. They brought him to visit on day 2 after I was up and moving but didn't keep him there long, just enough to show him mom was okay but tired and no need to worry. I absolutely don't think he needs to be there during your surgery or immediately post-op, it would have scared Connor to death to see me looking like that. Whole different story for my bypass when he was 8. He was concerned but also wanted all the gory details so, gory details he got! He did go to school like always on the day of my RNY, came to visit me the next day. Pushed my IV pole for me when I walked. He was the worlds greatest helper. But, there's a big difference between 5 and 8....he was definitely emotionally ready to know more this time.

I agree with everyone else. Kids do not have the coping skills to deal effectively with their parents being "out of it".

I agree with everyone else. Kids do not have the coping skills to deal effectively with their parents being "out of it".

I totally agree! I got sick in Dec and was in the hospital, my best friend brought. My 5. & 7 yr olds up to see me. They "seemed" ok at the time and now when I go to the dr, they ask if I'm coming home and beg me not to be sick. I am still working on getting them to understand that I'm not sick and everyone goes to the dr.

I really regret doing that to them for my own selfish reason (missing my babes) and I hope I can prevent any other kid from feeling the anxiety my kids now feel!