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Feeling so defeated

I am seriously feeling defeated and sad. My beautiful mother has found out that she has end stage liver disease and is in need of a liver transplant. Science is amazing and there is a way that a living donor, such as myself, can donate a portion of my healthy liver to save her life. Out of her three children, I am the only one with matching blood type. I was devastated to be told I could not donate to her due to my surgery. I asked them why, I am a healthy person, no meds for anything anymore. They would only say it was because it is not in the best interest of my health. I feel so bad and guilty, I wish I could do this! I am going to get a second opinion for sure.

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  • can not donate due to my surgery. . not in the best interest of my health. butterfly_gal i am so very sorry for your mom dealing with cancer i know you and family and friends are dealing with

  • 1Day1Life4Now
    1Day1Life4Now

    butterflygal, I am so sorry to hear of your sad news about your mom's cancer and your inability to donate. Please don't feel guilty about having your WLS surgery. Had you not had it ... you probably

  • southernsoul
    southernsoul

    I'm so sorry to hear of your mom's diagnosis and the stress for your family. Absolutely, get a second opinion and see what happens. But even if you cannot donate, I have a feeling your mom would not

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can not donate due to my surgery. . not in the best interest of my health.

butterfly_gal

i am so very sorry for your mom dealing with cancer

i know you and family and friends are dealing with so much sadness/feelings about your mom

i can only imagine your feelings that at this time that you are unable to proceed with donating some of your liver

i would continue your discussion with surgeon, seeing if anything can be done to change his mind

maybe he could have more consultations/discussion with your bariatric surgeon, discussing your good/improved health since WLS

but.............as you wisely said - get another opinion

you love your mom so very much - want to help her

its easy for me to say, but - try not to blame yourself if you are not allowed to proceed in helping your mom

'm sure your mom is very happy for your success/weight loss

keep trying to make it work - hope you can be successful

thoughts going out to mom and you

good luck my friend

take care

kathy

Edited by proudgrammy

I'm so sorry you and you're mom are going through this. I really do hope y'all find a solution. I agree, get a second opinion. They probably just have no clue how the surgery would affect you. You both will be in my thoughts.

butterflygal, I am so sorry to hear of your sad news about your mom's cancer and your inability to donate. Please don't feel guilty about having your WLS surgery. Had you not had it ... you probably would not have been healthy enough to donate anyway. As the others have said, get a second opinion. The rest of us will pray that another donor is found. Good luck and stay positive.

I'm so sorry to hear of your mom's diagnosis and the stress for your family. Absolutely, get a second opinion and see what happens. But even if you cannot donate, I have a feeling your mom would not trade your new chance at a healthier life for the ability to have you as her donor. I wish you all peace and healing at this difficult time.

If you want to make it happen keep fighting for another opinion until someone agrees. Medicine is much more of an art than a science than anyone cares to admit. Get your labs done and ask for a truly informed explanation as to why before you give up.

No matter what, my thoughts and prayers are with you.

  • Author

Thank you everyone. I am most definitely going to get a second opinion.

Thank you everyone. I am most definitely going to get a second opinion.

Bless you and your Mom! Thoughts and prayers with you both!

  • 1 month later...

Have you considered the programm where you trade donors? Someone from your family donates to a group and family members of each of the other patients donate too. It increases the chances of a match for your mom. Your doc should be able to give you details.

Hugs. That's a hard situation.

I am so sorry, this must be so difficult. Best of luck to you and your mom!

I am going to move this post someplace it might get more views...it doesn't really belong in Research....

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