Skip to content
View in the app

A better way to browse. Learn more.

BariatricPal

A full-screen app on your home screen with push notifications, badges and more.

To install this app on iOS and iPadOS
  1. Tap the Share icon in Safari
  2. Scroll the menu and tap Add to Home Screen.
  3. Tap Add in the top-right corner.
To install this app on Android
  1. Tap the 3-dot menu (⋮) in the top-right corner of the browser.
  2. Tap Add to Home screen or Install app.
  3. Confirm by tapping Install.
  • Appearance

Join BariatricPal free

  • Ask your own questions
  • Reply and follow topics
  • Message other members
  • No cost, no spam

Why are people so nosy?

Im scheduled to have my surgery March 26th (im soooo excited & nervous!). I had to tell my boss i was going to have surgery and all of a sudden my workplace knew about it and i felt i needed to explain myself too them on why i needed it! It's no ones business but mine!

And in regards to family- my mom, dad, sister and brother know & my other brother just found out and is MAD at me! ( Hes heavy himself) him and his wife aren't supporting me and want to know why i cant do it myself. Again, no ones business! They are what i like to call " haters ". Dont hate on me because i decided to take a step and help myself!

Thanks for letting me vent...

Anyone else going through similar issues?

  • Replies 8
  • Views 923
  • Created
  • Last Reply

Top Posters In This Topic

Most Popular Posts

  • I only told my husband, parents, sister, and 2 best friends the truth. My husbands family thinks I had the band, and otherwise I've not told anyone else. My sister when she found out flipped out esp

  • People are nosy because they think they can get away with it. They do it to people who feel like if someone asks a question you are required to answer it. You are not. Plain and simple. You can say th

Featured Replies

People are nosy because they think they can get away with it. They do it to people who feel like if someone asks a question you are required to answer it. You are not. Plain and simple. You can say this topic not up for discussion, or why would you ask such a personal question? Or I would rather not discuss this but thank you for your concern.

You can only be taken advantage of if you allow it.

  • Author
People are nosy because they think they can get away with it. They do it to people who feel like if someone asks a question you are required to answer it. You are not. Plain and simple. You can say this topic not up for discussion' date=' or why would you ask such a personal question? Or I would rather not discuss this but thank you for your concern.

You can only be taken advantage of if you allow it.[/quote']

You are so right! Im so done with being taken advantaged of. Thank you for opening my eyes!

I only told my husband, parents, sister, and 2 best friends the truth. My husbands family thinks I had the band, and otherwise I've not told anyone else. My sister when she found out flipped out especially about me going to Mexico, but I had already done the research and my mind was made up. My mother and fatehr and husband were scared, but they knew I would do this whith or without their support. People in my everyday life have been really complimentary about the weightloss, and when asked how I'm doing it, I've answered truthfully (sort of) I've told them I'm just eating less and exercising more. My mother let slip to my Aunt the other night thought that I have gone from a 24 to q 14 and she is so proud of me. My Aunt instantly flipped out on her and demanded to know what surgery I had saying it is impossible to lose that much weight without surgery. She was down right rude and pushy to my mom who would not give in and tell her anything. So my Aunt called ME and started the conversation 'So what did you do?' I was puzzled so I asked what she meant. She said my mother told her I lost weight and she wanted to know what kind of surgery I had. She was SO pushy and SO RUDE, I just laughed at her and told her I had no idea what she was talking about. which infuriated her even more. I really found the situation quite comical. She is trying desperately to lose weight (while maintaning her drinking habit) for my cousins wedding, so to hear that I've lost so much for some reason it made her flip her lid! Maybe out of jealousy? She was just down right angry, but that is the first person I've encountered that reacted in that way. I hope she is the last too! I haven't told anyone and don't plan to because it really is no ones business. I didn't have this surgery for them, I didn't have it for anyone to gossip or judge me about, and if they do, good for them. I had this surgery for me, and no one else. Hold your head high, be successful and laugh at all of them!

You are so right! Im so done with being taken advantaged of. Thank you for opening my eyes!

It's hard to do at first, but with practice it becomes easier. Then when people realize you are serious, they stop asking something that may be personal.

Good luck!

  • Author

I only told my husband, parents, sister, and 2 best friends the truth. My husbands family thinks I had the band, and otherwise I've not told anyone else. My sister when she found out flipped out especially about me going to Mexico, but I had already done the research and my mind was made up. My mother and fatehr and husband were scared, but they knew I would do this whith or without their support. People in my everyday life have been really complimentary about the weightloss, and when asked how I'm doing it, I've answered truthfully (sort of) I've told them I'm just eating less and exercising more. My mother let slip to my Aunt the other night thought that I have gone from a 24 to q 14 and she is so proud of me. My Aunt instantly flipped out on her and demanded to know what surgery I had saying it is impossible to lose that much weight without surgery. She was down right rude and pushy to my mom who would not give in and tell her anything. So my Aunt called ME and started the conversation 'So what did you do?' I was puzzled so I asked what she meant. She said my mother told her I lost weight and she wanted to know what kind of surgery I had. She was SO pushy and SO RUDE, I just laughed at her and told her I had no idea what she was talking about. which infuriated her even more. I really found the situation quite comical. She is trying desperately to lose weight (while maintaning her drinking habit) for my cousins wedding, so to hear that I've lost so much for some reason it made her flip her lid! Maybe out of jealousy? She was just down right angry, but that is the first person I've encountered that reacted in that way. I hope she is the last too! I haven't told anyone and don't plan to because it really is no ones business. I didn't have this surgery for them, I didn't have it for anyone to gossip or judge me about, and if they do, good for them. I had this surgery for me, and no one else. Hold your head high, be successful and laugh at all of them!

When you think family will support you and have your back and be so happy for you and then don't... that truly blows my mind! I've been so close with my brother AND his wife for so long that I'm so hurt by their reactions but at the same time I'm like "ha-ha". I get more support from my bestfriend than my own brother. And I do have to agree with you that it is jealousy! A couple of days ago I was so on the fence about even doing this surgery that now I realize I was following the opinions of people who were jealous that I was getting it. I always think back to when I was in highschool and one of my "friends" said to another "friend", "If Lisa was skinny I would be really jealous of her." & this is where my mind goes when people question my ability if I can do it myself.

Unfortunately, there are people that really don't want to see you happy or see you succeed, and it's sad that those people you thought would be strangers, no one you really care about, turn out to be family.

your brother and his wife obviously have no idea all that is involved in this process. It is by no means an "easy out"! Maybe they are a bit jealous as well because they don't have the courage to admit that they need extra help in dropping the weight. Take it in stride as best you can. You are doing an amazing thing for yourself and if they can't be happy and thrilled for you, to heck with them! Best of luck!

  • Author

your brother and his wife obviously have no idea all that is involved in this process. It is by no means an "easy out"! Maybe they are a bit jealous as well because they don't have the courage to admit that they need extra help in dropping the weight. Take it in stride as best you can. You are doing an amazing thing for yourself and if they can't be happy and thrilled for you, to heck with them! Best of luck!

You are most certainly right! I tend to be a people-pleaser, but I am so sick of letting it get to me. Right now, I have to think about me for once. Thank you for positive thoughts!

Maybe out of jealousy?

Sounds exactly like jealousy to me. They will get used to the idea, then once all the weight is off and stays off; they will start thinking about doing it themselves.

Join the conversation

You can post as a guest; create a free account to track replies, follow topics, and be part of the largest weight loss surgery community.

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

Account

Navigation

Search

Search

Configure browser push notifications

Chrome (Android)
  1. Tap the lock icon next to the address bar.
  2. Tap Permissions → Notifications.
  3. Adjust your preference.
Chrome (Desktop)
  1. Click the padlock icon in the address bar.
  2. Select Site settings.
  3. Find Notifications and adjust your preference.