Starting to freak
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Now. I don't *like* posting this because it seems attention grabbing to me, but. Hold me!
Now that I realized that I'll be waking in the morning saying "5 more days", I'm starting to feel like I wonder if my feet will even carry me to the airport that day. (Mexico sirgery) thank god I got a script for Ativan for this (first) plane ride. I've never taken anything like that, but this is one of those times.
During the day when the kids are awake and I'm busy, I feel fine. When they go to bed an all is quiet, and when I wake up at 4am because I can't sleep, I can't stop thinkng about it. "Am I really going to go through with this? This is huuuuge. " racing thoughts. I bought some calms forte, but realized I can't have herbal meds the week prior to. Sigh. I guess I'll just have to suffer. Too bad the Ativan is so addictive, if take half a day until then for these nerves.
Anyway, talk me down please? Tell me stories about your nerves and how it all turned out A OK?? Pat my shoulder and say there there?
This is all SO outside of my comfort zone. I'm just a small town woman. I'm a mommy and wife. I barely get out of the house, much less the country. And a plane? Fahgehtaboutit. Lets get on a plane, leave the country and while you're at it, let a stranger revamp your insides. Gah! Lol
Deep breaths. I'm not scared. Just anxious about the unknown.