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people comments on my weight

Since this weight loss journey, I've had to deal with a lot of comments, mostly good. I am a pear shape and tend to lose weight first on top so I prepared myself to hear some negative comments (i heard those when i had lost weight before). I'm hearing things like: I need to eat something before i blow away, I don't need to lose anymore weight, i'm getting too skinny, I'm going to look like a bubblehead if i lose any more, etc. now mind you these are not from people that are significant to me. I'm 5'6 and started out at almost 250 and wear a size 20.. now I'm 182 and wear a size 14 on my bottom and 12 on top.. i'm trying to drop down to a size 10 bottom but would evaluate myself once i'm a size 12 on bottom.. so in what world is that too skinny or that i can't afford to lose more weight. I find myself getting defensive and that frustrate me. People are making it seem I'm being ridiculous and unreasonable. I guess i'm tired of hearing it because i'm going home to see my family on thanksgiving (they don't know about my surgery just that i've been losing weight) and I expect more comments along the same line.

I just wanted to vent a little

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  • I know it sounds crazy, but some people actually think they are complimenting us by telling us we need to stop losing weight or we're gonna blow away and such. Try not to let it affect you because y

  • Take the compliments with pride, people get jealous and see how you are changing and know they want to also. My wife didn't like my weight loss and has made those type of comments, she is now trying

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I know it sounds crazy, but some people actually think they are complimenting us by telling us we need to stop losing weight or we're gonna blow away and such. Try not to let it affect you because you know what's best for you and what a healthy weight is. Sometimes if it's people who have only seen us bigger, it takes a while for them to adjust to the changes in us, and we might not look like ourselves to them. But what's important is that we're becoming healthier, and no one gets to decide how much we weigh, but us. Congrats on your success, you're doing fabulous!

:)

When they say stuff like that just smile and say "Thank you for noticing!!" That will shut them up. I agree with Kelly too that that's how some people compliment, but I also think some of them are jealous. Keep up the GREAT work! You will be where YOU want to be before you know it!

Take the compliments with pride, people get jealous and see how you are changing and know they want to also. My wife didn't like my weight loss and has made those type of comments, she is now trying to lose since other people comment on my loss and show interest in how I did it. I find the waitresses and third party people that know me give honest opinions and for some they see me as getting to thin for my body. My doctor tends to agree so we changed goal from 150 to 180 as I am at 195 now. Being a guy it is nice to hear from the ladies and some think I look fine now, why mess with success?

As for how much to lose, you have to live with yourself and if you lose weight in the undesired places then get a trainer to help mold body sections. My trainer helps to mold legs and arms so as to not get flabby skin and help shape the tummy and sides.

Sometimes it is now weight loss we need it is body molding as we can't control from what part of the body we lose weight from.

I don't think people realize they are offending you, or if they do they are jealous and being nasty. Either way who cares right? Your happy and only you will know when you have finished losing weight, not them.

Congrats on the progress. I too have had more than my share of comments from negative to positive. People can come up with the most insensitive stuff at times. Many things can be attributed to this behavior, as already pointed out jealousy can be a big factor, ignorance and plain rudeness for others. I just let it roll and live my life the way I want to now.

You've had some great success so far! Just keep doing what you're doing. When people make insensitive comments, something like, "Thanks-- my doctor and I had a conversation about this just last week, and he/she said I'm right on track!" will usually shut them up.

I've actually experienced the opposite--I have a very visible, people-intensive job as a musician/teacher, so I have a LOT of people who are seeing me for the first time since surgery and 90+ pounds ago. Their reactions are overwhelmingly positive, but sometimes I feel really awkward being the center of attention, even about this fairly positive thing. I'm not used to being quite as "noticed," if you get my drift, and even when it's nice people saying nice (not inappropriate) things, it's really challenging for me to simply smile and say, "Thank you. I feel great!" or something. I have a professional conference coming up in a couple of weeks, and it's going to be another round of "oh my goodness" and "wow, you look great," and don't get me wrong, I feel that I DO look so much better, but it still takes some getting used to.

You might practice comebacks, both to positive and less positive comments, until they feel natural. I always try to take the high road and not answer as if someone is being deliberately snarky (even if I think they are), but that's the southern girl in me, I guess. Plus, now I feel great, so I'm just not inclined to be as snippy. :rolleyes:

  • 2 weeks later...

These are all such great responses! I don't really have anything to add but wanted to share that I have already gotten a couple of those "you are so 'skinny'" and "how much more weight are you going to lose?" which is really strange because I haven't even broken the 190's yet and I am NOT even half way to goal!!!! So geez!!! Like Kelly said above, I think some of these folks have only seen us bigger so cannot imagine us anyother way. But it is difficult, as Meg mentioned, to be the center of all that attention! I found that I tend to brace my self everytime I will be attending a particular event / meeting where folks haven't seen me in a while. I truly don't want to talk about me and my weight and my food and, and what I'm doing, and me, me, me.... you know? I guess I'm just venting too! LOL Glad to hear the experiences of others here though! Why I appreciate this board!

Since this weight loss journey, I've had to deal with a lot of comments, mostly good. I am a pear shape and tend to lose weight first on top so I prepared myself to hear some negative comments (i heard those when i had lost weight before). I'm hearing things like: I need to eat something before i blow away, I don't need to lose anymore weight, i'm getting too skinny, I'm going to look like a bubblehead if i lose any more, etc. now mind you these are not from people that are significant to me. I'm 5'6 and started out at almost 250 and wear a size 20.. now I'm 182 and wear a size 14 on my bottom and 12 on top.. i'm trying to drop down to a size 10 bottom but would evaluate myself once i'm a size 12 on bottom.. so in what world is that too skinny or that i can't afford to lose more weight. I find myself getting defensive and that frustrate me. People are making it seem I'm being ridiculous and unreasonable. I guess i'm tired of hearing it because i'm going home to see my family on thanksgiving (they don't know about my surgery just that i've been losing weight) and I expect more comments along the same line.

I just wanted to vent a little

Mina,

I can relate directly yo this... a lady that I work with has said to me more than once... 'Oh Coops, if you lose anymore weight you will look like a bobble head!' Now, this is from a woman who is TINY!! She wears a size UK8... anyway, the last time she said it to me I replied. 'Oh now don't say that 'cos you are my role model!' Follwed by a little chuckle. Needless to say, she hasn't comment on my size since and I HAVE lost more weight! I refuse to let others negative comments affect me and my sense of self. I know what is right for me... and I feel that you do too.

You just keep going as you are... you've done such a great job and I know you are looking great!

Oh, on a foot note... I would give anything to have my pearshape back...lol... my weight is now in the middle and I am defo an apple!!

Keep up the good work Mina! =]

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