So, with fitness, I need to develop new habits. My whole life, I've been a fairly cerebral guy, and I've never been one for sports or fitness. My career -- as a computer programmer -- is both mentally and financially rewarding, but it is very sedentary.

Being the guy who was usually "picked last for the team" (due to obesity; by nature I have the build of a football player, but since I'm so sedentary, my body was always soft and unformed) I never cared much for organized sports.

So, I'm facing a fairly large hill to climb trying to change a lifetime of sedentary habits into one of good habits. I have a few weapons in my arsenal that I'm going to try to use, however.

1. I have always had problems with depression and anxiety. Most of these stem from poor sleep (when I sleep well, I have NO problems, but I almost never sleep well due to sleep apnea!) and too much caffeine (which, again, I abuse due to being tired all the time). One thing I've discovered in the last ten years or so is that nothing will calm me down and "level out" and improve my mood like some hard cardio work will. So I'm hoping to use this to combat the inevitable post-surgery blues.
   
2. Boredom. Let's face it, I get bored easily, and I have often tended to eat out of boredom. I won't be able to do this (as much) after surgery, and I'm going to need something to replace eating with. I'm hoping that I can replace eating with exercise to entertain myself. One problem is that I find traditional gym-style exercise very, very boring. Weightlifting is okay (because you can try different machines, and different weights) but machine cardio is the most boring thing on earth. So hopefully, I'll be able to find some entertaining ways to keep moving and keep fit. I've always enjoyed martial arts, but since my 20's I've been too heavy to really get into it; I'm hoping to take it back up. At almost 40 I will probably be the oldest one in the class, but what the hey, it's good for me.
   
3. Understanding how habits work for me. I've realized that it's really hard to quit a bad habit, and almost as hard to start a new habit out of the blue. From what I know about myself, what works best is substituting one habit for another, worse habit. I'm hoping to use this to learn how to substitute healthy fitness habits for older, unhealthy, sedentary habits.
   

I would LOVE to hear any advice people have on these topics. I really, really, really have to make fitness and exercise a habit now, and make it lifelong. I'm not just doing the sleeve to lose the fat; I want to really make a turnaround in my whole body health and learn how to stop being my body's enemy, and start seeing it as my friend, my vessel, and my ally.

Sorry to hear about your many dilemmas. Things will get better...I see that you still have a couple weeks until surgery. I know for me the weeks leading up to my surgery day were the hardest. I had a lot of anxiety and was extremely depressed. All I wanted to do was eat, I couldn't work out, no motivation, and I had many sleepless nights. One thing though I did give up right before surgery was caffeine. I stopped drinking coffee and diet soda, and I was an addict. I would have coffee every morning and have a couple of diet sodas throughout the day. Lo and behold my daily headaches immediately went away and I was able to sleep better. Another thing that I've found to help me sleep at night is a good workout during the day. If I push myself hard by the time it's time to go to sleep, I'm drained and I fall asleep instantly. (another naughty secret that puts me to sleep is good sex lol, like it literally puts me into an immediate coma)

Anyways, hopefully once you get your surgery most of your negative issues will take a turn for the positive. It really should happen and I can't wait to hear about your progress! :confused1: Start thinking of ways that you can get exercise in without necessarily being bored. To get enough you will eventually have to suck it up and go to the boring gym but there are other options i.e. I like to go skating and after a couple of hours of it I'm drenched in sweat with sore legs, all in all great workout and it's fun for me! There's tennis, swimming, bowling, hiking, biking and many more things. I too have a sedentary job, I am a city bus driver but I have lots of energy, so when I'm not sitting in the seat of the bus I'm ready to do something physical. Like sometimes I ride my bike home from work at night even though I workout every morning.

Anyhoo, like I said, I can't wait to hear about your journey after you get your surgery and begin to feel like a new and improved person all the way around, physically, mentally, emotionally, etc. :001_unsure:

Thanks for all the tips and information, fAiTh! You've got lots of good advice.

I'm hoping to pick up some sports that I like. I can deal with SOME boredom at the gym, as long as that's not the only way I can get fit. I'm hoping to get into some "guy" things to do; being the perpetual overweight geek, I've never really had much "guy" stuff in my life -- rock climbing, martial arts, hiking, and I find myself oddly missing that part of my life. Also sex, well, at my weight and not feeling so hot about my body, I haven't had much of a sex drive for a long time (which is kinda tough as a 39 y.o. guy, since we're expected to always be the ones to "get things started!") -- hopefully that will change too.

What I'm MOST hopeful for, though, is the sleep thing. I've struggled with sleep all my life (literally... one of my nicknames as a little boy was "sleepy"). With my sleep apnea, I feel like I haven't had a really GOOD night's sleep in AGES, and I'm really really looking forward to that. I'd almost be willing to have the surgery if that was the ONLY benefit.

I'm also looking forward to feeling good about my body again. It's really hard to explain, but when I'm overweight and doughy, I just don't feel super manly or confident about myself. I have had various times during my life when I've been lifting weights pretty hardcore (I have a body that's naturally built for it... and what do I do? sit on the couch all day!) and during those times I've felt way more upbeat about my appearance and masculinity. I'm hoping to get some of that back if I can shed some flab and build up the muscles.

Honestly though, I've been fat for so long now that I almost don't know WHAT to expect. I'm just hoping to build some new, healthy habits that can last me a lifetime!

Expect great things!!!!!!!!!!!!

i hope you find ways to change your habits, it sounds like you have some issues, what i would suggest is to change your overall way of thinking, try to be happy and positive, be grateful for everything you have, keep a journal, that helps and do every exercise everyday, and whatever you do, do it with a smile.....i hope these things help. i wish you the best!!!:thumbup:

Oh, we all have issues, I suppose. I just tend to be more outspoken about the things that trouble me. I doubt that, when you boil away the unimportant parts, I'm that much more messed up than anyone else.

I think that I've just learned a few things about changing habits, and was using you all as a sounding board for my plans for exercise changes!

Thanks for all the feedback :wink0:

I agree with you- we all have issues, just some are more vocal than others.

You are young enough to get back into martial arts-these days the ages in classes do vary. Do you enjoy swimming? Before I lost all this weight I went swimming in the local sound nearly every day and loved it. (Now that I've lost weight and will LOOK better) I'm a bit petrified to go into the water! You might like to ride a road or mountain bike--not boring at all. You've got great self awareness and some good ideas that are possible.