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Serious Advice/opinion Needed



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Lapband friends,

I am so torn right now. I have scheduled brachioplasty for July 2. I have care credit to pay for it. However, my house is up for sale and my divorce is pending the sell of our house. We both live in the house as neither of us can afford it alone. My parents gave me money for a divorce lawyer that I will pay over the next 4 months. I work a full time job and two part-time jobs. Fortunately, when I have wanted to have surgery, I have been able to secure a third part time job to help fund it via adjunct instructor. My parents do not like surgery unless it's life saving. I had a TT last summer and stayed ith them the first week, they were great. Owing my parents money is going to make their disapproval even worse this time. Being employed in education, summers are the best time for recovery, as I have at least 2-3 weeks consecutively off. My plan has been TT last summer, brachioplasty this summer and thigh lift next summer. Please honestly tell me if you think I should cancel this summer or follow through while paying my parents back?

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Will you in anyway be changing how long it would take to pay your parents back?

If you have agreed to a certain amount each month and you are able to pay them and the credit card then thats fine.....but it it one of those things of "I will pay you back as soon as I can" then I think they need to be paid in full first.

The only way around it would be to talk to them and arrange something else.....but since you don't think they will approve of your surgery, I guess talking with them about paying them back later is not an option.

If you haven't agreed to "how" you are going to pay them back, then I would figure out how much you can afford to pay them and still pay for the surgery...if they agree to the payment plan, then I think you are in the clear.....just don't make it something unfair like 10 a month.

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Hey waitingpatiently,

No, I plan to make 4 monthly payments and they would be paid in full. I'm actually giving the first payment tomorrow, so 3 more after this. I would actually have made 2 of the 4 prior to surgery. I can pay for my surgery over 2 or 3 years on my care credit card. I am starting a new job in July making more money as well. Im certain I can do both. I just know my mom especially will have a lot to say about me having the surgery in the midst of my personal issues and prior to paying ALL the money back.

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Since you have a payment plan set up to pay your parents back I say GO FOR IT!! I had my done 4 weeks ago and I couldn't be happier. I feel so much better in my own skin I have had 3 different procedures with a thigh lift in my future and my confidence is appropriately better. it seems you are starting a new chapter in your life why not a with a new body? I just want to state that although I am a believer in plastic surgery My value comes from who I am in Christ but being able to have the surgeries has been a blessing. Best of luck to you :-)

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if you have the money to pay your parents back and pay for the surgery then you should do what will make you feel good about yourself. and make you happy.your parents opinion i am sure you will take into concideration but ultimitly the decision is yours.it is your body and you are in control of it. you have to listen to your heart and do what is best for you.

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Thank you so much. My mom always asks me, "have you prayed about it?" my response is always yes, but I don't think she believes it because she doesn't like it. I'm glad to hear someone else say that Christ is one of the most important aspects of their lives and decision making. Something usually happens to open the door for me to do this financially and I feel privileged and blessed for the opportunity. I wanted Lapband for years and couldn't afford it. God has just really been moving things in my life and making things possible. I'm truly blessed despite my other issues.

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I would just be concerned about your financial future and stability at this point. You say you cannot afford to live apart from your soon to be ex until the house sells... Personally, I would be stockpiling my money for a rainy day. I would also put off the elective surgery for this year so you don't take on more debt. If you don't need the money you save, then you can always pay cash for your surgery later :)

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NWgirl, thanks. Let me clarify, we can't afford our current home independently. I have already been approved for a home loan pending the sell of our current home. I was in my own home when we got married. We lived there briefly and sold it to buy a home together. I am taking on an additional summer job and getting a new job (promotion) in July (more money). Financially, I would be using care credit and paying monthly payments for surgery. The sell of our house (with a reasonable offer) would provide a down payment for my next house. However, having that money as a back up plan would be good. I can save some of the summer job money for that even with the surgery. Thanks, I need all the input I can get.

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I also wouldn't put money for a cosmetic surgery on a credit card. Save up, and pay cash. Have you done the calculations to see how much interest you are going to pay for that?

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As long as it's not going to interfere with the payment plan you have with your parents go for it. Might just be the self esteem boost you need after a divorce. You sound like a very hard worker and deserve to have a little something for yourself.

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Thank you all so much for the honest and thought provoking input. I'm taking it all into consideration. I couldn't do this alone.

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Well LBT friends, Today (my birthday), I went for what was to be my final consult before surgery on July 2. I was informed that I had to have the stitches removed at the 2 week mark and I couldn't do that because I start my new job on that exact date. Therefore, I canceled and hope to reschedule in December. I have to call back in October and try to secure a date. I was told it fills really fast, so wish me luck.

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I also wouldn't put money for a cosmetic surgery on a credit card. Save up, and pay cash. Have you done the calculations to see how much interest you are going to pay for that?

I agree..... When i first started looking into my TT I got approved for the Care Credit. But then i looked at the interest and was in shock. So i went to my bank an asked about a personal loan. My friend at the bank said, you can defiantly get a personal loan for the $8800, but let look at this other option.... Chase Slate card. We did, got approved for the $8800 with 0% interest for the next 15 months... Have you looked into this option?

About your parents, can they afford to foot the bill for your surgery with out putting them selves in debt? If yes, then go for it...... If, then i would wait. I would never want my parent to take on debt for an elective surgery for me. I know they don't want you to do it, but this is a personal choice.

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Thanks, I will look into the Chase card, but if I didn't get it, I will be using Care Credit. I don't have an issue with that. My parents aren't paying for any surgery. They loaned me funds for lawyer for divorce. I will have paid them back in full in two more months. Therefore, by December, it will be a non-issue. Thanks for suggestion about the card.

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Are you really prepared for the procedure itself? I had a brachioplasty after I lost weight the first time. The pain was excruciating. I could not wipe or wash myself, so DD & DH had to help. That was so humiliating but I just could not move my arms around.

I also wound up with horrible infections but prior to that, the pain was unbearable. Please keep all of those things in mind before you move ahead with the timing of your decision.

I know what it's like to desperately want plastic surgery so I wish you luck in your decision.

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