So I get a letter in the mail from the place I got my sugery saying that I am due for a follow up/check up and I ask my mom if she can make me an appointment (yeah I know I should do it myself) and she's like "No" and I asked why "They should have checked up a while ago, what is the point?" wow, I need to so I can get some damn help. I am not getting anywhere besides going up and up and up. I can feel it all coming back and it sucks! I feel like she doesn't want me to lose weight like someone said to me. She's saying that it's all my fault that I'm gaining weight back and I can't help that I'm getting depressed and shiz and there's never any real healthy food here besides fruit and vegetables which aren't much of, bananas and what tomatos. yeah so I'm going to buy some Atkins protein shake tonight and it's not even going to last as long as I hope and I made myself a food and exercise plan starting for monday. I am really sick of being depressed....I feel like I don't have anyone anymore.

it sounds like you may have been too young to have this surgery. I hope you have your own income so you can take charge of your own food. That would really help. Also, maybe find an exercise partner. There are lots of activities you can do to stay active that don't cost anything. Maybe take on the attitude "I'll show YOU"! if mom continues to not be on board!

She says no so you just wont call? Seriously it is that difficult for you to take an appointment yourself? Really im sorry if i sound so rough, but this even sounds like a joke! You risked ur life for a surgery, i dont know who paid it, but you are fortunate to have it and now you are acting like a total victim.

The clinic needs to send you letters bcause you dont go to your follow ups and you dont even have the dignity to take the appontment and take care of yourself, inatead you blame everyone! Your mom prob answered like that because she is desperate and tired of being you enabler. Take responsability for yourself, take the phone, make the appointement, go alone(i always do), the doc wont eat u, and if you dont have a car, there are ways, go take a walk or exercice.

Your mom can do eerything for you, your doc cannot make you loose weight and watching the biggest looser crying about how big you are and how the band is ****, it wont get you no where.

I am really sorry i sound so mean, but this is not a joke, you dont do a major surgery when you cant take responsability for yourself.

You need to.start buying your own food if your mom won't. And I agree with other comments that it is YOUR responsibility to make follow up appointments. The key to band success is having follow ups and attending support groups.

How old were you when you had the surgery?

I'm sorry to hear that you're depressed. Try looking into attending a few local support classes and do your best to get back on track.

Hi Erin,

I'm sorry this is going so rough for you. You are 20 and I know its tough to figure this out all on your own. I'm pretty sure I couldn't do this by myself at 20. You need to follow-up with your doctors office as soon as you can and explain the problem to them. Perhaps they can hook you into a local support group. I know what it is like to feel depressed and its tough to pull yourself out of that hole, but you got to do it!

With regard to food, you dont have to spend a lot of money on food...

For Protein I eat a lot of eggs, cottage cheese, tuna, sliced meat, chicken. You can buy these things inexpensively. Get some lettuce and other fruits and veggies that are in season and you are good to go. Track all your food using an online tracker like myfitnesspal or something similar. Aim for 60 grams of protein a day.

Also, try to get some exercise in. Take a walk, ride a bike, something so you get moving. It will help with your weight loss and your depression.

Once you start to make moves in the right direction, you'll start to feel better.

PS...you need to take personal responsibility but I also think you should sit down with your mom and have a serious talk with her. Explain exactly how you are feeling, write it down if you need to. Tell her you need her help and support (that doesnt mean she does everything for you).

Good Luck...

Hi Erin, Think of how great it will feel if you take responsibility for yourself and make this happen for you. You are really the only person who can make you lose weight. That said support helps. Maybe you can find an OA group and of course you can come here. It may take you starting to doiton your own for your onto come around. If you don't have a job and can't afford food look for Angel food ministries on line. You can get a months worth of food for one person cheap. If I can do it so can you. Have you made your appointment yet?

Am I the only one who has read all of Erin's posts from day 1? This is just one more thing in her litany of complaints and nothing we say is going to make her change. She might need to get the band out so she can fixate on some other malady in her life.

Mimi

Wow, I wasn't expecting everyone to like yell at me, I was just looking for advice...

I know I am old enough to do things on my own. I never said I want her to do everything for me.

Please, don't jump down my throat.

If my doctor wasn't an hour and a half away, I'd be there all the time following up or getting a check up and going to support groups. They never have them near me anymore. And I know that's why they send letters, a part of the reason why she said no was because they never checked up on me when I got the surgery and I thought doctors were supposed to do that? Apparently not, I guess. But my insurance at the time always did.

If I was able to buy my own weeks worth of food at a time, I would, believe me. It'd help a lot.

And about getting the band out, my doctor won't let me because he know I'll gain it all back plus more. And yes I do know that it is my responsibility to not let all this happen. And I WILL change, not for you, for me.

I am NOT trying to make it seem like I'm blaming everyone else, I DO NOT mean to make it seem that way.

Sistersue- oh I know I'd feel great doing this on my own, I just wish I had someone for more support so yes, this is why I need to go to support groups... What is an OA group? No I haven't made an appointment yet, I haven't been home all day, but if possible I'll try to tomorrow and they're not open, I'll leave a message.

Jen120- It's okay. I know I have to make a follow up appointment asap. I've actually been wanting to. I hope they can hook me up with a local support group. A lot of foods are hard for me to eat, especially in the morning. And I'm planning on writting things down. I'm trying to get more exercise in. I'm trying to walk everyday but going shopping or running around with my neices. I want to go swimming, it keeps getting cold then hot, cold then hott....Oh I know I'll feel better. I know, I tried talking to her before but it seemed like it didn't help. And I never said she had to do everything for me.

I also want to move out too and I think it might help a little but I'm not ready to yet...

I KNOW I NEED TO DO THINGS FOR MYSELF...YOU DON'T NEED TO TELL ME.

Erin,

We were banded close to the same time and I have read your post during these last 2 years. You started out sick all the time and then no insurance to keep up with your fills and no support at home. You were trying to follow the rules and be a teenager too. It was a struggle for you to return to school with you feeling sick all the time . . .But you know what YOU DID IT! You MADE it through all of that and you can do this again. You know what to do so just start over and do it. I believe in you, do not let others discourage you do this for yourself. Good luck and just believe in yourself.

Cheri

Why dont you stArt weight watchers or something like that? Ur right, support is importAnt, especially since u seem to realise that you need to do more.

I started weight watcher because the meeting do help and you can go to as many as you want. I know they dont have the band, but essentialy, we are both trying to loose weight and eat better. They give us such good tricks to loose weight and keep it off and it is amazing during a plateau.

And you have the forum here to understand more about your band, and of course your doctor. Take an appointment, show your mom you are makIng an effort and trust me, if she is like my mom, she ll be the happiest woman alive and will bring you to any appointments.she is fed up and upset that you do not take charge of your life, so i think she will get even harder on you if nothing changes. You ll be so proud of yourself when you do, you ll really be confident for once.

123crod- sometimes i wish i can go back to the begining and do that. but i will start over, i'm thinking of doing liquids for a week, then puree(sp?) foods, then to solids, i made myself a meal plan based off of my brother's that he made me a long time ago which worked, i just took off some of the foo on it because why would i need two breakfasts. but yeah i need to get myself back on track and block everyone out so i can do this for myself.

Ellie936- maybe to weight watchers, my mom was sayying something about trying out this meal plan the guy who lost weight through subway but it wasnt a subway diet, he made a book or something idk but it has an idea for a meal plan and stuff. i know weight watchers help and stuff and people has have had a lot of success with it too. I know she will and when she sees me happy, shell be happy and will join in too. I know i will and i need that

Hi Erin, OA is Overeaters Anonymous, there are lots of them around and they are a support group. You may want to check and see if there is group near you. Just go and see what they are like and if there is more than 1 in your area shop around until you find the group that's best for you. FYI, it's a free will donation usually so it's cheaper than weight watchers and keep in mind you don't have to tell them about the band. If you don't mind I will pray for you. I wish I had done something about my weight sooner, you are ahead of me there. I was going to wish you good luck but that's not what it takes, is it.

I see my surgeon on wednesday and I'm getting a fill and I have a goal to lose 5-10 pounds by August 3rd or 10th

I see my surgeon on wednesday and I'm getting a fill and I have a goal to lose 5-10 pounds by August 3rd or 10th

Good for you! Everyone should not be so rough on you. It's hard for me at my age, so I know it has to be difficult for you. I am 10 years older than you. Take it easy, eat Protein and drink lots of fluids and you'll be fine.

Good for you! Everyone should not be so rough on you. It's hard for me at my age, so I know it has to be difficult for you. I am 10 years older than you. Take it easy, eat Protein and drink lots of fluids and you'll be fine.

I know right? I'm trying, I think I might actually have to go back and get a little out because I think it might actually be a little too tight now cause it's hard to get stuff down withought that feeling like I got to burp and it's not just with food, it's with Fluid too. And I also keep hiccuping