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Feeling a little sad today because a few weeks ago I had a call from the surgeon's office and they had a last minute opening on November 20 because of a cancellation. I am not scheduled until December 27, which is way later than I had expected when I started all this. My "ideal" date in my head had been November 13. I was so ready to jump at the chance, but I just couldn't make it work. As soon as I mentioned it to my mom, instead of being supportive, she had all sorts of reasons why I shouldn't move the date. Some were valid, like my teen daughter has a special (but not super special) thing going on later in the week that I would probably have to miss, and others were less valid, like she didn't feel ready and it might ruin everyone's holidays. Um, excuse me? It's not about her! And how would I single handedly ruin both Thanksgiving AND Christmas for my entire family by having a surgery? But she had informed me when I first got the December date that she planned on getting a hotel near the hospital and staying that night to be nearby, despite the hospital only being about 40 miles away from home. I didn't ask her to do that, but that's her plan, so there you go. She didn't ask me if I felt ready now, or what the wait through the holidays felt like for me with the surgery looming. So that was the part that hurt. I felt like I was having to make sure everyone else was okay with my choices instead of me, which is a theme in my life for sure. Don't get me wrong, my parents have been there for me so many times, and I don't want to sound ungrateful. But this really made me sad that what I wanted simply didn't factor in. Basically, I passed on what felt like a dream come true to get that call, and I've had to reconcile myself to it as best I can. I've found some silver linings, like more time to clean my house and test some recipes. But if I hadn't, I would be on my pre-op diet now (my surgeon only does a short liquid diet beforehand, so a Monday surgery starts the pre-op diet on Saturday morning). Instead, I'm getting ready to make dinner for myself and the kids, and I still have 39 days to go...
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I can relate to the parent's situation. I am 42 and still struggle with pleasing them. Yet they do whatever they want with no concern for how it affects anyone else, so why do I feel so obligated to them? I wish I had some advice that could help. One thing I have tried to do is stop sharing things with them that I really don't want to hear their opinion on. (like the business I am starting)
Like with this surgery, I knew I was going to need their help getting to the appointments and back from the surgery, so I knew I had to tell them. But I did not tell them until I was almost at the point of getting surgery that I was doing this.
I got hard judgment from my father, which I expected, I made him promise not to share this with his brothers (who are assholes) I told him whether he likes it or not I am an adult and I deserve respect and privacy especially when it concerns my health. (he begrudgingly agreed)
My mom on the other hand was supportive, but she has the tendency to add some dramatic flair about everything. her typical M.O. is to pop onto social media and rattle on about how something that is not happening directly to her, is affecting her ( I get it there no talking to the man she married about this stuff, so it's nice to have someone to listen).
I know they both struggled with trying to respect my wishes, they looked shocked when I told them that if I lived somewhere else, I would not have even told them I was having this surgery.
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I'm glad your father did agree to respect your privacy by not sharing with your family. And I guess I should be glad my mom keeps the dramatic flair off of the socials!
I'm both lucky and unlucky that my brother had VGS 15 years ago. On the one hand, my mom understands the concept and has seen my brother's good results from it, (we inherited the obesity from my father's side, and Mom has never dealt with more than those pesky 10 lbs average weight people always want to lose). On the other hand, my brother took exactly the opposite approach from me. He didn't live near family and told no one, had no support. He went to Mexico as self-pay and didn't say a word until about 4 weeks after when he was having some serious emotional struggles, living alone, and compounded by the fear of realizing that to get family support, he had to "confess." So his recovery was very different than what I anticipate for me. But because of all that, my mom definitely sees this as a "REALLY BIG DEAL." Which it is, but not the level she's at with it. Like, it's not an open heart surgery being performed in 1982, or experimental cancer treatment. I've also noticed that as my mom ages, she takes change a lot harder. She doesn't have the mental flexibility anymore to make an instant change of plans and roll with it, whereas I do that probably a dozen times a day.
I'm grateful for their help, but it comes at a price.
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Roux en y, 12/20/23, 5’6” currently on first full week of liquid fast down to 253, from starting 263 original dr visit. Surgeon, Dr, Meagan P. Lundgren, Dubois PA, counting down the days…in ketosis feeling the symptoms and experiencing awful odors. Pew!
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Roux en y, 12/20/23, 5’6” currently on first full week of liquid fast down to 253, from starting 263 original dr visit. Surgeon, Dr, Meagan P. Lundgren, Dubois PA, counting down the days…in ketosis feeling the symptoms and experiencing awful odors. Pew!
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I met with the nutritionist and surgeon last week and have received a surgery date of December 27. It's about a month later than I thought it would be, but I'm trying to make the best of it and not be too disappointed. My doctor's office only does 2 days of liquids prior to surgery, so while it does mean I will be on liquids for Christmas, I will have Christmas Eve without any restrictions (which is our bigger celebration day anyway). And I still get the surgery done on this year's deductible, which will help a little financially. So until then I am just working on establishing an exercise routine and healthy eating, but I don't have an additional weight loss goal that I need to meet. I'm sure the time will fly, but it feels so far away when I had been crossing my fingers for mid-November.
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I just returned my first post-op vacay. I was gone for a week to two different areas. The first place was a wilderness area on the Atlantic ocean, and then I visited an historic city for a few days.
On my most active day, I was able to hike 11 miles, and I accomplished my first solo backpacking trip. All of the other days, including the city, were 6-8 miles of walking.
One issue that came up for me was my mobile phone. I have become reliant on it for tracking macros, calories, and water intake. However, in the wilderness area, I did not have access to mobile data nor wifi, and the app that I use for tracking will not work if it is offline. I am sure that I met my water goals, but I doubt that I was able to reach my protein goals.
My second issue that came up with the mobile phone was, well, I broke it while in the city! So, in the span of 8 days, I was only able to track my intake for 1. It remains frustrating, as I haven't replaced my phone yet.
I will need to get some kind of paper logbook/backup option for travelling in the future. I am going to search the forums and start a post to find out what others use as an alternative to electronic journalling.
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Tomorrow will be 7 weeks since surgery. Yesterday i found that I was able to finally drink more than a sip at a time. I am SO grateful! I have always loved drinking water and it has been my primary beverage for most of my life; losing the ability to drink a lot of it was my first post-surgical regret. Being able to drink more than a tiny sip at a time makes me feel so much more normal.
I'm eating around 500-700 calories a day, and have hit my second stall. I have begun to only weigh myself once a week. I've made to the gym twice since surgery, but I've been walking my pup and walking at work up to 3 miles a day on average.
I've also been using resistance bands and stretching. I'm not quite ready for twisty yoga stuff yet. Or jogging. I did do a 10+ mile bicycle ride last weekend with a friend to a coffee shop where I had a cold decaf coffee with half and half. That was another activity that made me feel kinda normal.
I'm still drinking one protein drink a day, trying to hit my goal of at least 60 grams a day. Today I got 72 in thanks to a cold G Zero with 10 grams.
My abdomen is still a bit sore in general. The way I understand it, the inside is not fully healed until 3 months after surgery. That means sometime around November 1st. This is when I will go on the forever way of eating according to my provider's plan. I look forward to that day.
Oh! And I should mention that I learned about a chain restaurant that is in about 30 or so states. It is called Clean Eatz, and they have a menu that is friendly to we bariatric patients. My support group last night talked about getting pizza and flatbreads from there. I checked it out and it looks like it's both eat-in and takeaway. This is the first place I'm going when I feel ready to eat out again
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9 weeks post-op. I tried deli sliced turkey today, and it was dee-li-shus! I've been nervous about trying real meat too soon, and I'm glad that I waited. I've read a lot of stories about people vomiting after eating meat after surgery.
As far as that goes, I've actually not experienced foamies, vomiting, dumping or any other upper GI issues. A little pain if I drink too much water too fast. And constipation, but I figured out that was because I was eating too much dairy. Keeping it to one serving of dairy a day seems to be the key for my body.
Getting ready to go walk the dog, and then come home to go to bed. Y'all take care out there!
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9 weeks post-op. I tried deli sliced turkey today, and it was dee-li-shus! I've been nervous about trying real meat too soon, and I'm glad that I waited.
I've not experienced foamies, vomiting, dumping or any other upper GI issues. A little pain if I drink too much water too fast. And constipation, but I figured out it was because I was eating too much dairy. Keeping it to one serving of dairy a day seems to be the key for my body.
Getting ready to go walk the dog, and then come home to go to bed. Y'all take care!
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Today marks 4 weeks from my surgery date. My incisions are largely healed, and the surgical glue/scabs have fallen off. There is clearly more healing happening inside, where I can't see. My surgeon calls this 'surgical stuff'. The spot just under my left ribs is particularly tender. Is it my stomach? My hiatal hernia repair? It doesn't pain me too much.
My weight loss slowed down a bit the last 2 weeks, with the addition of purees. I've enjoyed things I never thought I would ever eat, such a dish I'm fondly calling 'tuna pudding'. Buffalo chicken dip with canned chicken is amazing. Surprisingly, ricotta bake was meh. Yogurt is still a staple. I've started experimenting with decaf tea. I would LOVE a cup of coffee, but no word yet on when I can have it. Soft foods are just around the corner, and all I can think of is tender, flaky white fish. And some soft asparagus.
I haven't had a ton of energy. I have to sit a lot and my walks are short and slow. I'm hopeful that when I can eat a little more I'll feel more athletically inclined. Next week, I'll try the commute to my office two days a week, which involves a lot of walking, stairs, and carrying my laptop. We'll see how that goes.
I had an overnight trip this past week, and packed a small cooler with my pureed foods. It was hard to be around others eating delicious things while I slowly spooned down curry chicken salad puree. Fun fact, not drinking while you eat curry chicken salad puree is a fun game. Play with your friends. I resorted to serving it with a bit of greek yogurt on the side to cool my mouth down. Driving multiple hours without caffeine or road snacks is also a new thing.
I've tried on some old shorts and work pants, to see if they fit yet. Some do, and some very nearly do, which is exciting. At least I won't need to source smaller clothes for a while. I'd saved all my favorite things down to about a size 14. Hopefully they are all still in style.
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"Tuna pudding." 😂 But I have to say that the buffalo chicken dip does sound good!
On my program, caffeinated beverages are allowed, so I've been slowly reintroducing caffeine. I've started with unsweetened tea, just 6-8 ounces, and that has not upset my stomach. The first time I tried straight up coffee, my stomach said, "Nope!"
Wishing you good luck with work. I'm back to work, and move kinda slow. Colleagues there have begun noticing my weight loss; I've only told them about the hernia surgery, and that I am going through a physician-directed weight loss program. I'm not ashamed of having surgery, I've just always tried to keep my professional and personal lives separate. We had a luncheon yesterday and I pointed out how many carbs were in all of the items, and how I'm not allowed to have them in my program. Then broke out my 2 ounces of hummus and some miso soup with soft tofu and pretended like that was what I really wanted.
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I got a little bag of samples when I saw the nutritionist last week. Turns out I much prefer the Celebrate 45 Tropical Twist vitamins to the Bariatric Fusion orange flavor, so I've placed an order for those and the sweet treat assortment of calcium soft chews, which were almost dangerously tasty. The Unjury chicken soup was better than the other brand I tried, but not enough to buy it. And their vanilla shake was vile. I just can't do artificial sweeteners, and probably not vanilla unless I add something to it to mask the flavor. The aftertaste was so strong and I had a vague impression of drinking baby formula. So far the only ones I've really liked have been the orange and peach flavored Syntrax Nectar Naturals, so I'm going to get two vegan fruit flavored options in case I have trouble with whey after.
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Thanks to the LPN at the office, who lost my testing/lab results and took over 6 weeks to let me know, even though I called to verify they got the paperwork, every week for six weeks to no avail. I am finally getting ready to be scheduled for surgery. Annoyingly, I have to get one more weigh-in due to her mistake and I can't get in to get weighed until Monday, plus my period started 10 days early and my weight is up by 2 lbs. I have struggled with weight loss that is why I am here, but never in my life, have I struggled so much to lose 5% of my original weight, until I started the bariatric program. Maybe it's the stress affecting me more than I realize. These 2 period pounds are putting me above the goal weight, even though last week I was 10 lbs below the goal weight. Honestly, I am pissed at this nurse screwing my stuff up and not informing me when I called over and over again. She has single-handedly affected my finances, my school scheduling, and my struggle to stay positive with her incompetence, not to mention she is cutting it really close to my surgery being at a time when it will be a struggle to get to the clinic that is 3 hours away up a mountain (not a hill), and the roads get super icy and snow covered. That is what is on my mind!