Hello folks
It's been 7 years this July since I got my band. I was losing weight (368 at surgery) really well until I got near my adult low which is 225. At that point I hit a mental block and stayed between 239-226 until now.
Currently I am at 233 but I've had a breakthrough recently and I believe that I'm ready to lose the weight now.
Part of my issue is that I've been at least obese since I was 5 years old. So much of my identity was that of the Fat Girl. I was always the heaviest one in the room. At my highest weight I was over 400 lbs. How much over 400 I can't tell you, that was as high as the scale went. It took quite some time before I was able to use the scale.
Until recently I didn't become aware that I was no longer always the largest person in the room. I can't begin to explain how that messed with my head.
With circumstances as they are now, it is doubtful that I will ever be able to have plastics done. Knowing this was another hurdle I had to get past. Finally I realized it was a matter of deciding if I'd rather look in the mirror and see the loose skin or if I'd rather see the slightly less loose skin and the progress I still want to make. I need to learn to love my body either way, so I might as well keep moving forward.
And just because the universe has a sense of humor, two years ago I survived a stroke. Thanks to early intervention, I managed to avoid any lasting physical injury and remain completely mobile. I do have cognitive issues relating to speech and memory. One fun issue I have now is remembering to eat. After years of being obsessed with planning my next meal or snack, now I actually have to track my food to make sure I've actually put some fuel in the tank.
Has anyone else had a mental block they had to get through before you were able to get to your goal? I'm thankful that for all these years I've been able to maintain. I guess I'd like to hear that I can make it from someone besides me (and my super supportive hubby who is always in my corner)
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