*susan*

I am sorry you feel this way. As you were told previously, no one is forcing you to continue to click on this thread and read it. But, to help me understand, if it isn't all bunnies and unicorns, you don't think it should be posted on Bariatric Pal? You believe that because you don't like being exposed to ugliness that takes place in this world, the post should be closed down?
Bariatric Pal is a wonderful support site. There are literally thousands of posts for you to read, and you can create your own. However, it is also a place where people come to seek information. What should I eat, what doctor should I go to, am I safe traveling to Mexico? These questions deserved to be answered as well, if unethical conduct is occurring, people have a right to know. And, as in any situation, there will be two sides to every story, and opinions will be discussed and debated. Alex chooses to allow this post to continue because it is extremely important information and people need to know. He continues to leave it open because there are at least two more of the now seven victims who are trying to work up the nerve to face the "firing squad" and share what happened with them. They have a right to be heard, people have a right to hear it.
Sorry if we offend you, at a message board where there are literally thousands of members, it is going to be impossible to please everyone. We do the best we can, but we also accept there will be times we are unable to.

I have nothing to hide. My Facebook information is in my signature. My email and phone number information are listed on my facebook. Before you make assumptions about who I am or what my motives are, which are purely to make sure no other woman are taken advantage of, learn who I am first. You are welcome to contact me anytime.
Now, I am going to share something. I am passionate about helping these woman. One is because I have and continue to be passionate about weight loss surgery, its benefits and helping others achieve their goals. Two, I strongly believe in doing what is right, and speaking out when I know someone is doing wrong, or has been done wrong.
To see these woman bullied the way they have been breaks my heart. To hear everyone state they are responsible or asked for it just kills me. Only three people in the world know what I am about to share, but I guess that is about to change. Five years ago I went through a divorce. I was newly divorced, thin for the first time since my teens and there was a whole new world out there for me. However, I was very naive about a lot of things. I was very vulnerable and not very strong emotionally. I was the former fat girl and loved feeling sexy and loved it when men noticed me. I was on a website and a man began being very friendly towards me. He was a professional body builder, I couldn't believe it, a professional body builder showing interest in my fat self. Because you see, when I looked in the mirror, I still saw the fat girl. He was suave, handsome, and well, a body builder, you can imagine. It was a local website and he asked me one Sunday if I wanted to come to his apartment to watch the race with him. Now, at 40+ years of age, any person in a normal state of mind would have thought, hey, this is the first time you are meeting this guy, perhaps you should be wise and keep it to a public place until you know him better. But, as I said, newly divorced, vulnerable, low self-esteem and this body builder was interested in me! So, I headed on over to his house. I wasn't there five minutes before he was all over me. I realized in a hurry this was not what I was prepared for and told him this was going someplace I wasn't ready to go and was going to leave. At that point, he literally carried me into his bedroom and proceeded to have his way with me. I tried to fight him off, but, again, he was a body builder and I was me, the more I fought, the more it hurt, so I stopped fighting. When he was done, he threw my clothes at me, called me a effing whore and that he was going to take a shower and I had better be gone by the time he got out. I ran out of there. I was afraid to tell anyone what happened because he was fairly well known in the area and I didn't think anyone would believe me. Like many of these woman, I went through an emotional hell. I thought it was my fault, I am a grown woman, I got what I deserved because I put myself in that position. But later, I learned someone did report him. He is now living in a nice little jail cell. Turns out, he also preyed upon woman. He realized newly divorced woman were vulnerable, many were desperate to feel loved or needed, and they fell for him. He knew all the right things to say to get these woman, including myself, to come to his apartment. And everyone of the woman had the same story, whether he took them by force, or they willingly submitted, once the act was over, he demanded they leave and never heard from him again. It was not any of our faults. Just because we made an unwise decision during a time of emotional turmoil and vulnerability in our lives did not mean we deserved what this man did to us.
You know what, the same goes for Omar's victims. If Omar approached them in an inappropriate manner and they refused and nothing physical happened, it was wrong of him, he took advantage of his position and it was unethical. If they fell for him, did have a "romantic' relationship with him, or whatever it should be called, he still took advantage of them when they were vulnerable, alone and afraid, and again, it was him taking advantage of his position and it was unethical. This is why I fight for these woman, this is why I fight for what is right. There is no black and white. There is only right or wrong. And it is wrong of him to satisfy his physical and emotional needs with patients who put their trust in him. He is a man, it is perfectly normal for him to seek the "company" of a woman, however, it should be someone he meets outside of his business.

The purpose is there is still valuable information here . Alex is keeping it open because he has also had direct communication with those involved. It would do them a disservice to close it and not have their stories heard. I have had numerous people contact me via PM here and on Facebook thanking me for posting this. I knew from the start it was going to turn into a battleground, but that did not stop me because woman are being wronged and I believe in standing up for others and what is right.

Well, I don't appreciate the digs at myself and the victims in this thread either. 
 
Now, lets talk about my credibility.  I have been a member of this forum almost since its beginning.  I know a lot of people as a result, have made a lot of friends here, and as I was administrator for years, people felt comfortable confiding in me.  I don't hide behind a screen name or a fake picture.  My screen name is my real name and the picture is me.  My Facebook information is in my signature.  I worked for Alex directly for over a year as a coordinator.  In doing so, I gained even more contacts in Mexico and the US.  I resigned in January after getting a major promotion at my "day" job, but continued to maintain those contacts.  Nothing made up there.  Fact.
 
I had surgery in Mexico.  I had many issues for several years following that I did not attribute to having anything to do with my sleeve.  When I went to a doctor about my issues, after a multitude of tests, yes, it was determined my problems were a result of my sleeve not being perfomed properly.  Then, after posting about it on facebook, another of my friends who went to the same surgeon advised me she had recently gone to her doctor for the exact same thing, and was told the same thing I was.  Nothing made up there, Fact.
 
In my process of being a coordinator, I referred a patient to a surgeon in Mexico.  While there she died.  I'm not going to go into great details, but the surgeon said it was due to undisclosed medical issues.  Again, after remaining in close contact with this person's husband and others, it was determined she had no undisclosed medical conditions.  There was a lawsuit in process, I had been contacted regarding it, I had seen medical records.  Nothing made up there.  Fact.
 
I became close friends with another coordinator for a different surgeon in Mexico.  When she quit working for him and I inquired as to why, she shared with me that he had told her he sleeved her, but in truth did not, his own coordinator.  She also had the medical records to show it.  When she confronted him, he admitted it.  She shared part of that information of the confrontation with me.  Nothing made up there.  Fact.
 
And then, there is this issue with Omar.  I have stated from the start, Dr. Illan is a good surgeon.  Omar is the problem.  When one person came to me, I questioned the validity.  However, after seven have come forward, I can no longer question it.  There is inappopriate and unethical behavior going on on Omar's part.  Nothing made up there.  Fact.
 
Now, who are you that you are able to discredit me?  What is your real name?  Where is your picture?  What is your background? 

Well, I don't appreciate the digs at myself and the victims in this thread either. 
 
Now, lets talk about my credibility.  I have been a member of this forum almost since its beginning.  I know a lot of people as a result, have made a lot of friends here, and as I was administrator for years, people felt comfortable confiding in me.  I don't hide behind a screen name or a fake picture.  My screen name is my real name and the picture is me.  My Facebook information is in my signature.  I worked for Alex directly for over a year as a coordinator.  In doing so, I gained even more contacts in Mexico and the US.  I resigned in January after getting a major promotion at my "day" job, but continued to maintain those contacts.  Nothing made up there.  Fact.
 
I had surgery in Mexico.  I had many issues for several years following that I did not attribute to having anything to do with my sleeve.  When I went to a doctor about my issues, after a multitude of tests, yes, it was determined my problems were a result of my sleeve not being perfomed properly.  Then, after posting about it on facebook, another of my friends who went to the same surgeon advised me she had recently gone to her doctor for the exact same thing, and was told the same thing I was.  Nothing made up there, Fact.
 
In my process of being a coordinator, I referred a patient to a surgeon in Mexico.  While there she died.  I'm not going to go into great details, but the surgeon said it was due to undisclosed medical issues.  Again, after remaining in close contact with this person's husband and others, it was determined she had no undisclosed medical conditions.  There was a lawsuit in process, I had been contacted regarding it, I had seen medical records.  Nothing made up there.  Fact.
 
I became close friends with another coordinator for a different surgeon in Mexico.  When she quit working for him and I inquired as to why, she shared with me that he had told her he sleeved her, but in truth did not, his own coordinator.  She also had the medical records to show it.  When she confronted him, he admitted it.  She shared part of that information of the confrontation with me.  Nothing made up there.  Fact.
 
And then, there is this issue with Omar.  I have stated from the start, Dr. Illan is a good surgeon.  Omar is the problem.  When one person came to me, I questioned the validity.  However, after seven have come forward, I can no longer question it.  There is inappopriate and unethical behavior going on on Omar's part.  Nothing made up there.  Fact.
 
Now, who are you that you are able to discredit me?  What is your real name?  Where is your picture?  What is your background? 

It doesn't matter what *Susan* wrote before or otherwise. The info is what's matters. Both sides confirm that this guy has slept with several(if not dozens) patients. No matter what he should not be doing that. We have ethics in this country for that reason. The fact that he does so much business in this country he should be held to the same standards. Also this guy doesn't care that these girls are puky or bloated as long as he gets his rocks off. I'm sorry the doctor needs to address this issue because all it does is make his office look bad.. Tell the Latin lover to keep it in his pants.

Please just STOP ! You have made your point very very clear. Make the change let the rest of this thread be a positive place for victims or alleged victims as you have said for them to feel safe to express what they have been through. Let them HELP the next woman that may learn from this and prevent themselves from becoming PREY to those despicable individuals that do the most harm when women are at their most vulnerable. Please DON'T let this thread be wasted anymore on this constant bickering of he said she said. PLEASE

Once again, I did not say your name. Please quit making this about you. It is about the victims. If I am directly referring to you, I will quote you or say your name.

Well, as someone that has counseled people in these types of situations, I just have to say that I believe that 95% of the people that have seen this thread will take it to heart. The other 5% will turn a blind eye and blame everyone else. Just figure out which group you belong to.

Whitney clearly haves some pretty deep ceded psychological issues. I am sorry she is doing this to you Alex. Do you think it is possible that she is Omar's current lady of the week and that is why she is defensive of him? I really can't see any other reason for her behavior. And what grounds would she have to press charges, this thread is not even about her. Is she somehow connected to Dr. Illan and Omar in a way we are not aware of. I believe it is time for me to put on my "investigative hat".

So if YOU do it, it's truth.  If someone exposes YOUR (factual) information, it's slander/defamation/lies/abuse/bullying/etc.  
 
Interesting.  

I am sorry you feel this way. As you were told previously, no one is forcing you to continue to click on this thread and read it. But, to help me understand, if it isn't all bunnies and unicorns, you don't think it should be posted on Bariatric Pal? You believe that because you don't like being exposed to ugliness that takes place in this world, the post should be closed down?
Bariatric Pal is a wonderful support site. There are literally thousands of posts for you to read, and you can create your own. However, it is also a place where people come to seek information. What should I eat, what doctor should I go to, am I safe traveling to Mexico? These questions deserved to be answered as well, if unethical conduct is occurring, people have a right to know. And, as in any situation, there will be two sides to every story, and opinions will be discussed and debated. Alex chooses to allow this post to continue because it is extremely important information and people need to know. He continues to leave it open because there are at least two more of the now seven victims who are trying to work up the nerve to face the "firing squad" and share what happened with them. They have a right to be heard, people have a right to hear it.
Sorry if we offend you, at a message board where there are literally thousands of members, it is going to be impossible to please everyone. We do the best we can, but we also accept there will be times we are unable to.

I am sorry you feel this way. As you were told previously, no one is forcing you to continue to click on this thread and read it. But, to help me understand, if it isn't all bunnies and unicorns, you don't think it should be posted on Bariatric Pal? You believe that because you don't like being exposed to ugliness that takes place in this world, the post should be closed down?
Bariatric Pal is a wonderful support site. There are literally thousands of posts for you to read, and you can create your own. However, it is also a place where people come to seek information. What should I eat, what doctor should I go to, am I safe traveling to Mexico? These questions deserved to be answered as well, if unethical conduct is occurring, people have a right to know. And, as in any situation, there will be two sides to every story, and opinions will be discussed and debated. Alex chooses to allow this post to continue because it is extremely important information and people need to know. He continues to leave it open because there are at least two more of the now seven victims who are trying to work up the nerve to face the "firing squad" and share what happened with them. They have a right to be heard, people have a right to hear it.
Sorry if we offend you, at a message board where there are literally thousands of members, it is going to be impossible to please everyone. We do the best we can, but we also accept there will be times we are unable to.

1. No. I did coordinating for Bariatric Pal's service for one year until I resigned after receiving a promotion at my regular job and no longer was able to do both.
2. None
3. No, but I did refer patients to them.
I work for a national construction research and education company, they have nothing to do with bariatrics. No competition involved. I am 48 years old, engaged, have two children, two dogs, and live in a small house in the woods.
I was sleeved by the doctor the former poster claimed I had no experience with.
I have the permission and blessing of all the woman to speak out on their behalf in the hopes that other woman will be more aware of what may or may not happen to them and hopefully prevent them from becoming victims.
I feel sad that woman are so unwilling to stand up for others, and are so quick to assume that because something did not happen to them and they had a good experience, it must be the same for everyone else.
I personally referred some of these woman to this doctor, and in part, feel responsible for the emotional distress they are now in. Others have sought me out because they know I have connections, and am a well-known voice in the bariatric world.
Anything else you want to know about me?

We're making approximately $1.25 from the total page views this topic will end up reaching (I kid you not.) It's much more personal for me. It's not about the $. Truth needs to be told and I won't allow bullies to shut up the victims. There are 6 cases we know of. There are most likely 50+ over the last few years that we're not aware of.

Sorry Ms. Antiband. I promised a potential Rev-splat. It's about to land!
Apart from this becoming waaaaaaaay out of hand.
Just a couple of splat-like objective observations from the verbose one;
Should this topic be broached on this website? Well, yes. Potentially ‘sanitised’, it should. It's about protecting others against a risk factor present when anyone goes overseas, in a country that is not their own (with associated afforded protections) and there is a credible threat to those in a vulnerable position being taking advantage of by those in a position of authority. Should it have been tabled as it has been? Possibly not. There are always ways in which to couch things and as Susan is not the directly aggrieved (although always with the utmost best intentions), the message can (and has) been perceived as disingenuous. In my humble opinion (and as Susan later revised into a concise paragraph-which I’m about to make bigger), a wider and possibly more inclusive and less ‘explosive’ overall message could have been: 'If you are traveling to Mexico, please be advised there are (potentially [my inclusion]) people who are willing to take advantage of you for their own personal needs – (as there are predatory, licentious and opportunistic people in any walk of life [my inclusion]). They understand you are in a very vulnerable state. Don't become a victim, protect yourself. And don't allow a handful of people to make you feel like you have done something wrong, when you haven't (if you have been unwarrantedly preyed upon and speak out [my inclusion]). (If any of you experience behaviours of this nature, please report them immediately to the police or any person in a position of authority at the hospital concerned as quickly as practicably possible [my inclusion]).
(Most people know that ‘fraternising’ (sexually or otherwise) with hospital employees–no matter how remarkable the situation, or how bowled over by the temporary care and compassion shown, is not advised [my inclusion]). No matter what anyone else says, it is unprofessional and unethical (as it contravenes well established patient/care-provider boundaries and should not be entered into, it is suggested, during the period of the contract or after-care term. Not only does this lessen the potential for the primary care of the patient to be compromised, but also protects the employee themselves [my inclusion]).'

– Or something like that.
This could have then been followed up with earnest and compassionate discussion about the prevalence of such events, personal experience (if people felt comfortable enough to do so). There could even have been a caveat included to state that if anyone has been affected by the issues presented, please contact one of the hosts or even Alex himself, whereby those in charge will endeavour to point you in the right direction of counselling, legal advice, etc. etc. Not, as it has become; character assassination and non-sensical, barely relevant claim and counter-claim. (Which, incidentally, I found utterly yawn-worthy) and has served no purpose but to obfuscate the core message intended – which when you get down to it, is about concern over patients’ well-being.
Should those involved (those in the medical profession or those representing it), have been named and ‘shamed’? Now, this is where it gets tricky. The 'no smoke without fire' saying is indeed a very powerful one - as has already been mentioned. Should the core message about women being ‘aware of the risks’ and given appropriate and official ‘avenues for recourse and reparation’ as far as international laws and norms for ‘offences committed overseas’ are concerned - yes, it should have been. None of us are judge and jury and as in a court of law; individuals are ‘innocent until proven guilty’. However, despite how the message has been delivered, the owner of this site has chosen to uphold the posting of this message, by one of his staff. It is for he, and he alone, to determine the veracity of the ‘information’ supplied and whether the message is appropriate or not. Conversely, it is for the representatives of the clinic concerned to determine whether they or their employees have been defamed. Not, as it appears to have become, for those who have taken personal umbrage (for whether they find the post, or the supporting contributors statements ‘offensive’, or they, themselves, had received outstanding care from the persons mentioned and have felt the need to become ‘defensive’) to ‘shoot the messenger’, who in fairness, has acted in good faith and is supported by the owner of the website. For the reason above and in relation to those of you seeking 'concrete evidence' as to what took place? There have already been individuals who have bravely stated they have been subjected to inappropriate advances, licentious discussion and the most concerning, personally, having a representative of the hospital situated in their hotel room when they returned, accessed through an official key-card; without alleged invitation and prior discussion or approval. That is harassment. Whether or not the ‘fors’ and ‘againsts’ choose to ‘believe’ or ‘disbelieve’, it is shocking enough that these situations are surfacing and not just by one isolated person – but a number of potentially unconnected people. For those of you asking for ‘evidence’ to support this? May I remind everyone, that the UK and US went into Iraq, losing thousands of lives, on the basis of a ‘credible’ ‘Weapons of Mass Destruction’ threat. Although unrelated, did anyone ask for the ‘hard evidence’ before this happened? No. Nor, as individuals would we have been provided it. If there is evidence of wrongdoing at the clinic concerned or by its personnel, it is for Law Enforcement agencies, medical licensing authorities or companies advocating the services of the clinic to establish whether what took place was inappropriate. Consequently, to ask for this is ludicrous. If those in a position of authority at this website have been entrusted with such information, then they would severely abuse the trust and privacy of those who came to them if they divulged it freely. Consequently, I refer back to point 1 about the post in its form requiring to potentially be sanitised before posting. Points of view. This is an open forum where all points of view and experience (given in a measured, balanced, personally-founded, non-attacking way) should be appreciated and valued. However, the one thing I can’t seem to get my head around (outside of the playground level bickering), is that as human beings, if one of you said ‘Oh, I have an ingrowing toenail and that cream I was given by this chemist has caused my toe to wither up and fall off’, would we all be screaming for evidence of it? No, of course we wouldn’t. But conversely and to this, I acknowledge, would we be up in arms and asking for the Chemists head on a platter? No, we wouldn’t. Because, fundamentally, the wider audience would not have the emotional investment the aggrieved has, because their interaction is vicarious and has not been as a result of them entrusting their life in the hands of the ‘accused’ and thus their original ‘judgement’ about who they selected to operate on them being perceived to have been brought into question – which it hasn’t. However, it is not the surgeon (latterly acknowledged), who is the primary object of concern – although, he could be, if the subject was aware of the ‘alleged offences’ and turned a ‘blind eye’ to it. So is anyone right here? No.

Most importantly for me; someone (some people), have taken the step to name an individual associated with an act(s)/behaviours they found deeply offensive. Whatever the circumstances, should we not show them some compassion? Take away from the fact that the OP is a member of this website, former employee, formerly involved with bariatric referrals (which give a lot of credibility to what has been said, but also brings into question the intent); two people are here stating that they have been ‘hurt’. Surely that’s enough to show some form of understanding and compassion – even if you think some of the claims to be spurious?

Please, let’s stop taking this as an attack of our personal decision making skills and a slight on those we have chosen to befriend and let’s keep it to what it should have been; a general warning to women to be on their guard, a safe place to express concerns by those who feel they have been ‘wronged’ and for people who have been utterly satisfied, to state just that. The rest of it is just conjecture, hair-splitting, ego-centric posturing and more importantly, toe-witheringly unreasonable.
Now… where’s the contact number for that pesky Chemist…..

Actually, I believe another of the woman will be sharing what happened with her. I have given her fair warning that she will most likely be vehemently attacked and bullied, but she is quite tough and I believe she can handle it.

I just read this entire thread, and I think my head may explode.
I don't know Omar, Susan, Dr. Illan, or anyone else here. But what I do know is that from what I can tell, Omar's behavior was EXTREMELY unprofessional, and I would have expected to see each and every woman and decent man in here saying something along the lines of "if that happened, it is horrible, and it needs to be addressed". I didn't expect blind acceptance, but a measure of "hey if this happened that sucks" would have been ok.
The lack of compassion for others that is displayed here is appalling. Omar is an a-hole if he did these things, and although a-hole does not equal rapist, it certainly does, in this situation, equal someone who ought to be prevented from working with female patients in this capacity.
By the way, I have seen right here in this thread so many misconceptions about rape, assault, and unethical behavior that it makes my head spin. I am so very sad about it.
Now, my personal opinions:
@@*susan* I can understand why you wanted to speak out on behalf of these women, and I get it. BUT I do think, personally, that it would have been easier to process, more effective to serve your purpose, and better received, if you had been able to convince the women to post their stories in the beginning rather than you making the post. I know you were doing what you felt was right. I dig it. But the purpose was to warn women about a predatory man, and I just think that message was lost because you were the message bearer. In the case that they did not want to post themselves, and I can understand why they wouldn't want to, then it may have been better to make the post more general. Just my opinion. Either way I respect your intentions.
Also, to @Chubtastic: Ma'am. Call me a feminist, and maybe I am, but even if this situation was COMPLETELY above board (which it is not BY FAR), I am amazed at your almost instinctual defending of the male person (the accused) in this scenario. Males are not automatically guilty, but I must say that you excuse Omar's behavior multiple times while condemning this woman because she was married. Who hurt you? He doesn't have a life outside of work? Really??? So, if a professional is busy, it's perfectly fine for him to make sexual advances toward his clients? That is absolutely the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard in my life. Holy cow, baby, come on back to earth. There's room for you here, I promise...
...not that I'm sure I want to be on earth anymore.
I hope that Dr. Illan is able to take out the trash and restore some order to his coordinating team. Until now, I've only ever heard good things about him, and I hope he would not knowingly allow this sort of behavior to continue.

It seems that the members of Team Illan who've spoken up here have a different moral code than those of us who support the six women who fell prey to The Fabulous Omar.  
 
Not saying it's better or worse--but definitely different.  
 
So unless some more of those six women want to tell their stories or the two who've already posted here wish to expand on their stories, I guess the two groups are just hanging around staring at each other with our mouths open, unable to understand how the other side can possibly see things the way they see things.  
 
In the meantime, a record about The Fabulous Omar and His Treacheries (or His Romances, depending on which camp you're in) has been created here for all to read and interpret.  Alex has made clear the thread won't be deleted.  
 
So unless someone wants to post pix of their tattoos or before-and-after plastic surgeries, what else is there to talk about?  

No I would rather not elaborate on mine or anyone else's religious beliefs. I just hope and pray that this post has given enough warning out there to the future patients of this doctor. Even though the doctor is great, you need to be warned about his seducing coordinator and all the other hoopla that will happen if you fall for his tactics.

Thank you!!

DO NOT turn this thread into a religious debate, please. If you wish to discuss religion, please start your own topic so as not to detract from this one.
Thank you.

You need to follow our posted forum rules or you'll give us no option but to suspend your account. Please stop the name calling and cussing.

Excuse me! Seriously who are you that you know anything about me? I am the only person on here so far that has used that scripture. I know exactly what it means do you? Probably not since you are here judging people. If you are a God fearing person you should know it's not your or anyone else's place to judge people. He will judge when its time.

Babygirl 1987, since you are so obsessed withe her marriage vows and Christ why are you judging her? You who are without sin shall cast the first stone!