My journey thus far!
· renee3846 · 08/09/2009 18:19
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renee3846
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Blog Entries posted by renee3846
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I can not believe that it has been almost 10 months since vsg surgery (10/2008) and over 5 years since I started my research into weightloss surgery. When I first started looking into WLS I was probably at a weight around 250 pounds. In some ways I wish I would have had surgery sooner, because then I would have not developed diabetes (which I no longer have) and maybe have not have stretched my skin as much, but in reailty, my time was when I finally got it. I truely believe if I would have waited too much longer, I may not be here. Also, finding the right surgeon and surgery was such a blessing.The journey so far has not always been a breeze but compared to where I was heading, it is a piece of cake! The head hunger is a real sympton and can make you crazy if you do not get a hold of it right away. I know before surgery I was an emotional eater (and still am occassionally), whether I was up or down, food was the reward, the soother. I even ate in private sometimes, like going through the drive-through and getting fries and tarter or whatever it was for that day. I guess I figured if no one saw me eat it, I did'nt eat it, I was in huge denial. Now with the stomach restrictions of my surgery, I have to watch what I eat because I get full really really fast. I am more aware what is going in now and see it as a source to stay heathly now that I am feeling healthier and looking healthier. I had to have a lot of talks with my self and ask if what I was ready to put in my my mouth was worth it, sometimes, my heads wins and I eat that bite of cake or ice cream or whatever it may be at the time, but I also came to peace with myself that it is okay to have that "bite" and not the whole thing. My head thnks it won because I ate the bite, but I won because it was only a bite! Not something I could do before surgery. I recentlly started water areobics again which has kick started my weightloss again. I was at a standstill for almost 5 weeks and was really getting discouraged. Here I paid thousands of dollars for a surgery and I ws not losing weight. (I was also focusing to much on losing and not staying focused on how healthy I was becoming) I am glad that it has passed and I am preparing if it happens again. I was talking with my PP and she said it may have been your body taking a breather, after losing that much weight it a short amount of time it need a break and to adjust and prepare for the next chapter of my journey, makes sense to me! I work in an organization that has about 1500 employees and have worked there for over 8 years. On a daily basis I see people I do not see often and they are all coming up to me and sayig how wonderful I look and almost always ask how I did it. I have been very open to answer that I had WLS, but the farther out I get, the more it feels almost like a burden to explain, maybe because I have explain so many times. Please do not get me wrong, I appriciate that people are noticing and it is nice to hear that my accomplishments are being noticed. I can not wait until my next visit to see Dr. Trotter at the end of this month, it will have been 2 months by then since I seen him and up until now it was every month but he decided to take almost all of August off...I am sure he deserved it! I am hoping I have maintained my muscle mass or even better gained muscle..we will see!