blackcatsandbaddecisions

Oh man, those initial stalls are no joke. I think so many years (decades) of having a stall mean that our weight loss efforts were failing yet again has made us all super paranoid about them. The good news is that especially this early in the game, a stall is temporary and doesn’t really mean much. Just focus on the day-to-day and you’ll get there! Post op is just a short period of time in your journey, you’ll be in onederland before you know it!

Oh man, now that I am hearing others combined the surgeries that might be a deal breaker for me. I want to just take care of it all at once if I can, because getting time away from work/taking care of my parents will be hard enough for one surgery much less multiple. As it is I feel like getting time off for my bariatric surgery took about my entire 6 month waiting period to coordinate. It’s funny because in terms of where the loose skin is, my stomach is obviously objectively worse, but my arms are what bother me the most. I dream of wearing a sleeveless top someday, or waving at someone and having my arm not make a “thwack, thwack” noise.

Did you have both surgeries at once, or split up? And I’m not surprised to hear about our being in an expensive region- seems like a shoebox is being sold for half a million most everywhere here, so makes sense surgery would cost more too. I really don’t want to travel but it might end up being my best option. 40k-ouch!!

Well, doesn’t look like anyone had suggestions thus far so I’ll just update my own thread 😜. I contacted Dr. Hayes and Dr. Waldorf, both in Portland, OR to see about setting up consult appointments. Both had good reviews but we will have to see how initial appointments go. My list of what to ask is: 1. Costs, and what are reasonable combinations of surgeries? 2. I have a lot of loose skin on the upper abdomen, would a traditional tummy tuck address this or is there another option? 3. I’ve read about drainless tummy tucks and I’d have a strong preference for that (don’t know why but drains really freak me out), is that a possibility and why/why not. 4. As a “far down the wishlist” idea, addressing the sad state of my cleavage post children and 175 lb weight loss would be nice. I don’t think I want implants but would like to hear a surgeons thoughts. If anyone else has any thoughts, let me know! My dream is to get consults with both on the same day (morning, afternoon) so I can take one trip. I know both surgeons are quite popular however so I may be a long time out, and coordinating like that may be a long shot but a girl can dream.

Thank you so much for sharing…I really appreciate it.

Appreciate the info! If you feel comfortable would you mind sharing the cost? This is a procedure I’m considering and I’m trying to get an idea of this.

I didn’t eat potatoes at first, but over a year out I eat them now. Not every night, and I’m not getting fries at fast food, but tonight for dinner I’m planning on making a potato and chicken sausage fry. I don’t have a ton, but I really enjoy the meal. Carbs are a tricky subject on these forums. Some people avoid them for life, and some have zero restrictions on anything. Personally I try to be reasonable with carbs- I don’t need candy or fast food, but I do have small amounts of rice and potatoes if it’s a part of a meal that is more heavily weighted to vegetables and/or protein. It works for me.

I had a lot to lose (175 lbs) but I went with the sleeve anyway. I ended up losing all the weight. Either surgery can be great for you, it’s just a question of what you want and what your surgeon recommends. I liked the “simple” nature of a sleeve, and I knew people who had gotten it and had great results. A bit over a year later I am still happy with it, still maintaining my full loss. I don’t have to take bariatric vitamins anymore, I just take standard vitamins from Costco now. Honestly there are some valid medical reasons for one over the other but if those don’t exist it’s just a matter of preference and both are great surgeries that can be super successful for you.

I had reflux before surgery, had a sleeve, and now it’s almost nonexistent. I’d ask your surgeon. I was surprised mine still recommended a sleeve, but he said that since mine was controlled with Tums it was fine. Looks like he was right.

I had surgery on 11/10/20, but started my weight loss efforts on 7/5/20. If you’ve been here a while I’m sure you’ve seen me lurking about the forums. Stats: SW 339. CW: 165. I am a 5’10 woman in her 40s. I work full time and have young children. My current BMI is 23, I started off with it closer to 50. I knew it was going to take me a while to hit goal- I had 174 lbs to lose. I did all the calculators pre-op that said I would be lucky to get under 200 lbs, but I decided that just wasn’t going to apply to me (haha). My plan was to focus on fruits, vegetables, and healthy proteins while ramping up exercise. I eliminated cookies, pastries, and candy but that’s about it. I don’t do low carb, because that isn’t how I’m planning on living the rest of my life. I focus on calorie reduction, which sounds like oh if that’s so easy why did you need surgery? Well cutting calories is possible if you aren’t hungry all the time no matter how much you eat, and if you can fill up on the healthy things without it being like flash paper into a volcano. I honestly did need the surgery, and I’m not going to pretend it did the work for me, but it gave me the help for the work I wanted to be able to do. Six days a week I do a split between running and rowing for a half hour. I’m going to run in a 5k this spring, which has been a dream of mine for years. I exercise on my lunch break every day. Yes, I have some loose skin. It’s nowhere as bad as people make it out to be. I am not exactly planning on running around in a bikini so it’s not like it limits my life at all. It’s not visible in my clothes, not even tight fitting ones. I might get it removed some day, but if I don’t I’ll still be happy. This weight loss has been the fulfillment of a lifelong dream for me. Life is difficult when you are morbidly obese. It’s difficult physically, emotionally, and socially. This weight loss hasn’t fixed every problem in my life, but I didn’t expect for it to. It fixed my weight related problems, and I had a lot of them. This surgery can be life changing, but it’s not a magic bullet. You still have to make huge life changes. But if you feel sabotaged you your own constant hunger, cravings, and binges, this can really be the tool you use to dig yourself out of the seemingly insurmountable weight you need to lose. This isn’t a finish line for me. I am still working on hopefully losing another 15 lbs, and I’m never going back to my old eating habits. I know I signed up for a lifelong change, otherwise I’ll be right back where I started. But finally hitting goal was a nice early Christmas present to myself. Sorry for the essay, but I don’t really have anyone in real life to share with who gets it!

Yeah, a part of me does kind of feel like…ok what next? But I do still want to lose a bit more weight, and I’m trying to increase my running distance so I always have something to work on. I must confess I do kind of miss the days of dramatic drops in weight…it was pretty exciting!

Oh sorry I missed a question…I decided on this weight because I had gotten down to 165 once before (very, very briefly) and I’d liked how I looked and felt. So I put that down as my goal weight. Sitting at almost 340 lbs at the time I kind of worried my surgeon would roll his eyes, but everyone just accepted that and I went forward with that as the goal. I think a goal weight is a personal thing- some people look amazing still “overweight” , some people are more muscular, etc. I like that I’m in a healthy bmi but at the end of the day I kind of feel like I know what I want to look/feel like, so that’s how I came to the decision.

Thank you all for your kind words! These forums have been great for keeping me on track before and after surgery. I really appreciate you all. Honestly this is pretty much the only “before” pic, and I’m not even quite sure it’s at my highest. My program said take before pictures right before surgery, take measurements. But of course I didn’t listen. My main goal for photos pre-op was “don’t be in them”. A few more questions I see all the time I here I will answer: yes I lost hair, yes, even though I got my protein and vitamins. It just happens. I cut my hair shorter, and literally the only other person who noticed was my hair dresser. And all the hair is growing back now, which looks kind of funny since it’s a little frizzy halo on my head. But the whole hair thing is kinda funny to be honest, not a huge upset or a tragedy. No, I don’t feel like weight loss made me look dramatically older, nor did I gain wrinkles or jowls. But I’m in my 40s, and I’m a skincare enthusiast and regular Botox user so that may have influenced stuff. 😂 Yes, I can eat “normally” now. If I went out to a restaurant with someone who didn’t know it wouldn’t be obvious outside of what looks like a small appetite. I’m not eating special bariatric diet food. Happy to answer any questions people have! And thank you all again.

Yes, I also weigh less than my husband now, which is amazing. He and I are almost the same height but for most of our marriage I was twice his weight. Now I’m ten pounds less. It was fun playing on the teeter totter at the park last weekend and being the light one for once! He weighs almost the exact same amount of weight that I’ve lost, and I can barely pick him up for a second or two. It’s incomprehensible that a year ago I was going about my entire life with that weight on me. How did I even walk? Now I know why I was so exhausted all the time.

The weight loss back pain is real! I had a heck of a time for a few months. I fully believe what was said earlier about sudden shift in how you hold yourself. Once my stomach started going away I’m sure it messed with my center of balance. I started exercising more and it eventually went away.

I had a single shot latte 3 days after surgery. I didn’t die, my stomach was fine, and honestly the warm milk was the thing that went down the easiest of everything I’d tried thus far. Your mileage may vary. My doctor didn’t really care about coffee

I have a friend who every picture I send her she comments on how thin I look. Sometimes it’s like ok thank you but I’m not concerned about the thinness I need advice on if i should buy this pair of jeans! 😂. I know she means well, though. I think some people in our lives are just so struck by a he physical change they don’t get over it for some time.

I agree mine was a joke. I could have saved time and just taken a buzzfeed quiz. Literally the only question she asked me that wasn’t on the printed form was if I had a good relationship with my mother. It was super confusing and when I asked for clarification she asked if I felt like I could confide in my mom. I told her she had pretty bad dementia so…not really? After hearing that she immediately went back to the form questions and didn’t vary again. Over a year later I am still curious about that. Why my mother and not my father? And what exactly was she looking to glean from that? Anyway, the answer that both my parents have dementia and can’t be confided in because it would confuse and upset them wasn’t a disqualification for surgery, for what that’s worth. 😅

Spicy food on healing stomach: not a super great idea Spicy food once stomach is healed a few months later- give it a try, you’ll probably be fine. I eat spicy food the same way I did pre-op. No problems here. But I was always in the “medium to low heat” category, so ymmv. In my defense my 23 and me test confirmed that my ancestors basically just sat around eating unseasoned salted fish in Scandinavia for generations, so comparatively I’m pretty adventurous. 😬

I have a distinct memory of looking at myself in the mirror the week before surgery and saying “ what the heck are you doing?” Just suddenly hitting me that after all the work I was going to remove a healthy organ. But I just kept on trucking ahead and before I knew it the surgery was over. One of my friends asked me recently if I wish I could be “back to normal” now that I lost the excess weight. Not in a million years! I still love my sleeve, and over a year later the novelty of being able to be “full” so easy hasn’t worn off. Change is hard and scary, but it becomes normal over time. This surgery is pretty darn low risk comparatively. And staying morbidly obese is a high risk activity every day!

Can you get some assistance from a food pantry? If you google some in the area there may be options. That could help you both, especially if they have canned tuna, chicken, etc on offer. No judgement here. We are all doing the best that we can with the resources we have available.

Last few years I was able to get through the Pacific Northwest winters with basically a glorified hoodie. This year I actually bought a winter coat- in a size medium! Losing 172 lbs means a lot of insulation is gone.

I’m 13 months out and would do it again in a heartbeat. I’m down 172 lbs and less than half the woman I once was. It is a lot of hard work still, so don’t just assume you’ll get the surgery and the weight will fall off without you having to do anything. But if you’re willing to put in the effort it can be life changing.

I’m a bit over a year out, and I’m firmly in camp carbs are fine. I know there’s no way I can eliminate carbs forever. It’s not the way I want to live my life. I did eliminate candy and pastries/cookies, because I feel like those are a slippery slope for me, but no fruit or potatoes or even sushi and beer just isn’t going to work for me. I exercise a fair amount and I keep my overall calorie count down, but I’m not giving up carbs for life. We go out to a local pizza place on occasion where you can get a slice and a salad. I always eat the salad first and have a few bites of the pizza before I get full. So no, I don’t go crazy like I used to, but I still am having some.

Yes and yes. I am a bit over a year out and I can (and do) drink, and I greatly enjoy going out to eat. I just drink wine and beer, and I can’t drink the amount I used to, but I shouldn’t anyway because I’m less than half the woman I used to be. I don’t eat “diet” food when I’m going out to eat, but I also do try to be conscious of what I’m ordering. My hedonistic days of ordering and finishing a huge plate of food followed up with dessert are over, but that’s for the better. I have a great time going out to eat, and I love trying new breweries and new wines still. Life isn’t over post sleeve I promise. 😊