Ana1990

Hi!! I’m 29 and I’ve been dealing with my weight for the past 2-3 years (depression included). My BMI is 29.9 and my weight is 181 pounds, but my normal weight all my life had been 125 pounds. I’ve tried SO hard to get back in shape and it has not been posible. It really sucks for me to look in the mirror and see such a different person (it doesn’t help that people with unsolicited opinions tell me that me knees hurt because I’m fat, or the neighbor asking me “have you always been this big? or my mom “you don’t Try hard enough””....Anyways. My weight got to affect my mental health in the past year and I’m tired of hiding at home, crying, hating the mirror, hating the closet and the breakdowns in the morning because nothing fits, not seeing my family, friends and nobody in general. My husband suffers from seeing me suffer. He doesn’t even care if I lose weight or not. He only wants me to be happy again and smile like I used to when we met. This is so hard for me and can’t even begin to describe it. It’s been a never ending battle and I want to live again. Anyways (sorry for the long story, I think it’s the first time I write down how I feel about this), After long investigation I decided the gastric sleeve was the solution for me (the doctor is great and has performed 8.000 of these surgeries) and the surgery is goi to be on February 24th. but I am extremely scared of the surgery and scared of any type of complication during or after the surgery. I know the risks are less than 1% but I still panic thinking about it and everyday I wonder if I should cancel the surgery or go ahead. Also I’m scared the surgery won’t work because of my “low” BMI. I want to lose 55 pounds so I can reach my final goal of 125 pounds, but I’ve heard that people with higher BMIs lose a lot more. Haven’t really found or heard much testimonials of people with low BMI and their weight loss journey. If anybody went through this or can help me in some way it’s very much appreciated. thanks!!!