Arabesque

There are carbs & there are carbs. And there are carbs in many foods not just the ones we automatically think of like bread, pasta, crackers, etc. Like others, I wasn’t given a carb limit. Just advised to keep them low & told no rice, bread or pasta as most people are. I was allowed instant oats from purée & then transitioned to traditional coarse rolled oats. While losing I got carbs from barley, legumes & other vegetables & (blue) berries. Still do. For example there are about 60g of carbs in 100g of chickpeas which is more than 100g of white bread but the chickpeas are a complex carb & much better nutritionally for you In maintenance I was advised to look for multi/whole grains. I still keep my carbs lowish. Still don’t eat rice, bread or pasta not just because they are too filling & sit too heavily but also were foods I easily indulged in.

In the weeks before surgery you’re on the restrictive pre surgery diet so no alcohol for about two weeks +/- prior to your surgery. After surgery you’ll be advised to avoid alcohol too for a period of time. Alcohol is high in empty calories, dehydrates you & will slow your metabolism & weight loss. Plus there is the concern that if you have an addiction to food you will become addicted to alcohol as you can’t satisfy your food cravings.

Can’t believe no one is really willing or wanting to help. I think it may be time to find a new doctor too. As a side note I found acupuncture very helpful with my oozing disc pain which raises it’s ugly painful self every couple of months. (Except my acupuncturist moved like 90+ minutes away so not happy.) It dud more to help my back in a single treatment than the physio did in four sessions. It may help with your sciatica too. The last time my back went I had some sciatica as well & I found some exercises online to help stretch & open up the muscles & release the nerve. I added them to my daily stretches which I do to support my back. Just a suggestion.

We usually suggest people follow the plan they were given but in your case that won’t work because no one on your team is on the same page. I’d probably follow what the surgeon says to begin (especially through liquid, purée & soft food stages). Your surgeon would be more focussed on supporting your healing & recovery after the surgery. Once through the recovery stages, your dietician is probably best to support your ongoing weight loss & giving you nutritional advice. But that’s my thoughts. I’d also certainly let them know how confusing it & how easy it can be for a patient to do the wrong thing & do themselves harm.

It takes time for our head to catch up with our new reality & throw in some body dysmorphia for some more brain trickery. I’ve found now those mental pictures of myself are more just memories of what I once was but I still have moments of catching a reflection & being surprised. PS - It takes time for other people to see the new real you too which is why you may get those comments like: you’ve lost too much, when are you going to stop losing, etc.

I don’t eat chilli anyway as I have a sensitivity & it always stirred up my reflux & stomach acid something awful. I wasn’t told to avoid any herbs or spices & I remember adding garlic, ginger, parsley, chives & basil from soft foods. (Didn’t use fresh or dried at first but the purée versions.) Check with your dietician & then try to see how you go. You may not tolerate something at first but it may be fine later on.

The truth of the matter is not everyone reaches the goal weight they have chosen. And not everyone maintains that weight if they do attain it. Remember the average weight loss at three years post surgery (bypass or sleeve) is about 65% of the weight you had to lose to put you in a healthy weight range. Genetics, your body’s set point, lifestyle choices & preferences, age, gender, health & medications, etc. & yes a little complacency. But there’s nothing wrong with any of this. Any weight loss is a win. You may find a conversation with your surgeon, doctor & dietician helpful.

To add to everyone’s great advice above, don’t forget, your rate of loss slow as you get nearer to your body’s set weight. This is the weight your body is happiest at & will settle at. The surgery resets this from where it was but it may not be the weight you want to be. To get below this weight you will have to consume less & do more. It will be more of a struggle & difficult to maintain that lower weight because you’re fighting your body. Personally I’d put on weight at 1500 but I’m short at 5’3”, not very active, more finely built & 57. But before surgery I couldn’t lose eating 900 calories. But don’t think your weight loss is over yet. You’ll get where you’re supposed to be in your time & there’s nothing wrong with that.

First, congratulations on your surgery. Secondly, it’s okay not to be ticking all the boxes in the first couple of weeks. As long as you are making an effort & you are getting closer it’s okay. You’ll find some days are easy & otherwise more of a struggle. Your shakes, broths etc. all count towards your fluid intake and I used to dilute my shakes (doubled the water) to dilute the flavour & to up my fluid intake. Used to sip on them for a couple of hours or until finished. Also added a little more water to the soups & broths too. If you’re worried about your protein intake you can also add some additional protein powder to your shake & swapping in protein water for drinking water will help too. I embraced my dislike for sweet & used it to withdraw myself from sweet tasting foods & drinks. Once onto purees & more solid foods, you’ll likely find other foods, even old favourites, smell or taste bad too for a while. It passes. Vitamins can be a challenge. The taste, difficulty swallowing them, nausea, etc. I took capsules which were easier to swallow (once my swelling reduced around day 4). Some surgeons are strict on when you can begin swallowing meds & recommend chews or patches. So it can be a bit of trial & error to find the right ones for you. Expensive too.

Some people do experience diarrhoea. I had a terrible case on day three & a friend had attacks for about a week. Try some immodium to help. (It was on my list of meds to have on hand post surgery.) Don’t worry the constipation will come. PS - Watch out for wet farts. An unpleasant surprise.

Quite a common suggestion. I personally just used teaspoons & then cocktail forks (sporks). They do help you keep your bites small.

Your feet get fat just like the rest of you so when you lose weight you loose it on your feet too. I usually was a 38.5 but then went to a 39 when I gained my last 15kg. Now I wear a 37.5/38. Wait till your rings start to slip off your fingers cause, yep, even your hands & fingers get thinner.

I only told my mum, one brother & sister-in-law, & one friend (she was my transport😉) at first then slowly let other friends know. There are still some who don’t know. One because she’s always been very competitive with me so there was no way I was telling her. She thinks I went to a dietician which is partially true. I didn’t tell my other brother because I knew he & his wife would be very judgemental. When I first started losing he congratulated me & was supportive but then he found out about the surgery & has never said another word. His silence was damning in itself. Though at least I haven't had to put up with his criticisms…. probably because it’s been successful so far. I find it easier to tell strangers about the surgery than those I know & the strangers have all been quite positive & inquisitive. When I had my gall surgery last year I had to explain why I needed to make changes to the menu options. Afterwards several nurses come in to ask about my sleeve & experience which was unexpected. Wonder if family & friends have the potential to be most vocal about their negative (& often uneducated) opinions because they believe they have the right to tell you you’re doing the wrong thing & feel they have to ‘save/protect’ you from a such a terribly bad decision.

Looking fabulous @BayougirlMrsS. Who’s wedding?

Further to my post a while ago, I had my first micro needling session about a month ago but I had derma pen which is deeper & more precise. My reaction lasted about four days instead of the usual 1-2 days of redness. I spoke to my cosmetic physician & she’s going to do subsequent sessions more lightly as my skin is more sensitive. I’m expecting to have 4 sessions in total six weeks apart. It takes about three months for your skin to go through a renewal cycle & therefore to see any results. I decided to try it because of my cystic acne scaring & open pores. If it helps with loose skin that would be a bonus. My doctor also recommends a maintenance session every year. This pxt is about 6 hours after it was done. It was more rash like in the following days & no makeup didn’t cover the rashy blotchiness.

Started when I got home so about day 4. And the vitamins I was advised were capsules. They were a little difficult to swallow for day or so until the swelling in my throat fully disappeared. Always take your vitamins after you eat or with your last sip/bite. It may not solve any nausea issues but it will help some. Also don’t be afraid to spread them out across the day if you have to take multiple vitamins. I took one of the 2 a day I had to take in the morning & one at night.

This is another one of those it just depends because we’re all different. I can’t recall being swollen post surgery (it was a little while ago now) & wore the same waisted fitted pants home a couple of days later without issue. I do reminder feeling a little tenderness/sensitivity in the abdominal area for about a week. I used to roll my waistbands down to sit below my tummy not to put any pressure on the wounds. Same with tummy sleeping. I’m a side sleeper with a twist (so from about waist down I’m 3/4 on my tummy) & I was sleeping like that in hospital. But there are many who can only sleep on their backs for some time. Are you having issues with swelling? Are you swollen or bloated?

And a little head to toe colour from me. Was attending a lunch for a charity of which a friend is a director. It supports families who have lost a child from gestational losses to children in their 20s. First gala lunch they’ve been able to hold in 2 years. Tickets sold out in 5 minutes so they had to have additional people in a second function room & also live steamed the event. They raised $91 000. So marvellous for a worthy cause.

Your comment ‘in my head I’m not satisfied’ set off alarm bells for me & I’m worried you may have developed an eating disorder of some sort even though you say you want to put on weight. Have a chat with your surgeon/doctor & ask for a referral/recommendation to a therapist who specialises in disordered eating. It’s hard to judge your weight without knowing your height but I would worry you are underweight at 100lbs. What does your surgeon or doctor say? I would also think you are eating very low calorie to be at that weight too so if you want to gain weight the first step would be to increase your caloric intake. You can do this easily without introducing cakes, cookies, etc. into your diet. Simply increase the nutritious foods you already consume. This can be through snacks & portion size if your portions are smaller than recommended. Not knowing your diet, consider adding multi/whole grains. Snack on cheese, fruit, vegetable crudities, nuts, some good fats like avocado. Your dietician would be best placed to advise you on this of course.

While there are similarities there are also differences as we have different needs. I was barely eating 900 calories at goal at 6 months but some are eating 1200 within a couple of months. I was never given caloric goals. Just protein, water, & portion size recommendations. It’s best to discuss this with your dietician. They should consider things like, your age, height, build, gender, activity level, etc.

Yes, everyone is different & they have different requirements around needing vitamins or not. And our requirements do change. I would ask your doctor why too especially as your blood tests show you aren’t lacking in anything & have for a while. Though are your blood tests showing everything is okay because you take vitamins? Maybe some comparison testing is needed. I stopped taking vitamins at about 8 months with my surgeon’s approval. They were making me nauseous & I was still losing. I said you want me to stop losing than I need not to feel nauseous (it want all that bad more felt off than nauseous). My blood tests were good as well. He said ok but would keep reviewing my three monthly blood tests to ensure everything stayed stable.The only thing I take is vitamin D in winter as we realised it dropped every year then.

Heartily agree with everyone. You need to go back to your surgeon & your dietician ASAP. You also need a blood test to see what minerals & vitamins you are lacking & then you need to get on your plan & take the vitamins etc. you need for your body to function. We’re talking about your health. Curious as to why you aren’t eating solid food & aren't taking your vitamins? Some people are scared to start eating real food as they think they’ll stop losing. Is this your worry too?

Could be your multi vitamins. They used to make me nauseous & almost vomit most days. Ensure you take them after you’ve eaten & spread them out across the day if you take several. Iron is probably the worst culprit but other vitamins can cause it too. Try looking for a different t brand or if you take a multi & an iron tablet, you may need to cut down on the iron itself. But talk to your medical team first. Worth trying to see if they’re contributing.

It’s from the carbon dioxide gas they use to inflate your abdomen during surgery. This gas escapes by rising & being absorbed into your blood before being breathed out. When it rises it usually ends up under your diaphragm & puts pressure on a phrenic nerve which causes the shoulder pain. It can take up to a week +/- to disappear. Walking, deep breathing, marching in the spot, lifting your arms up & down all help move the gas. A heating pad can help with the shoulder discomfort too.

Like @kcuster83, I too did a lot of reading & I was fortunate who had a friend who’d had the surgery a good year before. My surgeon was very informative & gave me a book to read too. It was very reassuring to know what I was experiencing was to be accepted. Of course sometimes the actual experience can be different from what you imagined. And sometimes the degree to how we experience something can be less or more. If it is more be conscious of what may be too much more like too much pain or too much nausea. If you’re not sure give your surgeon or team a call to be certain all is okay or to get some meds or advice to manage it. My recovery went pretty smoothly too. The only real issue I had was low energy & low blood pressure but that in itself was to be expected based on my own idiosyncrasies with those things. Best advice for the constipation is keep on top of it. If I got to day 3 without movement, I’d take a stool softener. On the odd occasion I’d need to take two the next day but that would fix it. If it didn’t I probably would have tried a stronger laxative. Personally I have an issue with artificial sweeteners. Anything that continues to feed your desire for sweet things isn’t a good thing in my opinion. Xylitol can cause a lot of bloating too so tread carefully if you do decide to go down that path. All the best.