Arabesque

First: All because you can doesn’t mean you should. It takes around 8 weeks to fully heal. That includes all nerves that were severed or damaged to be back firing again & sending accurate messages to your brain around, hunger, satiety, damage and your restriction. It’s why sticking to the portion size recommendations you should have been given is so important during the healing stage. (If you didn’t get them ask your team for some guidance.) You don’t want to damage your healing tummy either (all those sutures and staples holding your tummy together). Secondly: Do you need the next bite or just want it? There is a big difference between needing to eat and wanting to eat. Stopping to think about each bite you take is part of mindful eating and reflecting on your eating vs. mindlessly shovelling food into your mouth. If you just want the next bite (to make you feel better, out of habit, or other head hunger related desires) put your cutlery down & sit back from the table. Sometimes you may take another bite after a few minutes, other times you don’t have any more. The goal is not to eat until you are full but until you are satisfied and have had enough for your needs (for your body to function effectively). It takes at least 20 minutes for the message you’re are full to get through. If you are eating quickly when the message gets through, you’ve eaten more than you need and are over full. The goal also shouldn’t be to eat until you feel the restriction. If you feel your restriction you’ve eaten too much, or too fast or food that is too dense. The restriction fades in time so you can’t rely on it as a long term maintain e tool. The two axioms have been very important to me and helped me stick to the plan I was given in the losing stage and then to maintain in the years after. I’ve often shared them & I hope you may find them helpful too.

How many calories for just the curious kitty? 😉

My minister at church very concernedly asked if I was ok obviously worried I was sick. A neighbour, after congratulating me on how good I Iooked, ‘suggested’ I not lose anymore. My uncle commented I looked like death. I had people I’d known for decades not recognise me & then make a fuss even though I was only obese in the last 5 or 6 years & was often a healthy weight in the years they knew me. And so on. We talk about our body dysmorphia but I believe others experience it in how they see us. They have an image of us being obese and they find it very difficult to accept us not being obese. So you get told you’re too thin, wasting away, you’ve lost too much, you must be sick, or just plain rude and unkind comments. Some of those are from people who are jealous or bitter b**ches. Some are from people who feel more comfortable seeing you as obese and want you to stay in the fat friend box. And yes, some come from people who want to be supportive but can’t express it in a way that doesn’t come out wrong (critical or hurtful). In time you won ‘t get those type of comments. Eventually, people start to see you for how you are now as their perception changes. I haven’t had anything said to me for about 3 years now (well except for my sister-in-law’s cow of a mother last Christmas but I hadn’t seen her since before my surgery).

First, congratulations on your surgery. No, it’s not uncommon to start having doubts, worries, be a bit emotional about things. This is a big thing. Something you have never gone edits so and have absolutely nothing to base these new experiences and emotional reactions you’re having upon. With a sleeve, about 75% of your tummy is removed. This differs person to person & depends upon the size of your tummy. Larger tummy, more is removed. I actually got an internal photo of my tummy being removed (it’s not framed up on my wall 😄). It is impossible for you to regain if you’re following your plan and the volume of food/calories you’re consuming. A very common occurrence, which almost every one experiences, is called the three week stall. Around the three week mark (could be earlier or later than then) your weight loss will stall. It may last from 1-3 weeks. It’s very normal & just your body taking a moment to adjust to the changes and reassess your new needs (metabolic rate, digestive hormones, etc.). You will start losing again. Because there is no hard and fast rule as to your rate of loss, surgeons don’t tend to set weight loss goals - interim or final. There are just lots of averages around how much you may lose and how long it may take. Your surgeon may have spoken to you about how much weight you may lose by a certain time but it’s no guarantee of what will happen but just an idea of what might happen. They may ask how much you’d like to lose and then advise if it is possible or not. Whether it is possible or not is based on stats (averages). Don’t worry about not meeting your fluid or protein goals in the first weeks. It’s not easy in the beginning. As long as you’re making an effort and aren’t too far off. You’ll notice you get closer and closer and some days will be easier & others will be a real struggle. A quarter cup of food seems like nothing to begin but is again not unusual. My advice was 1/4 - 1/3 cup from purée to about a cup at 6 months. If you’re struggling eating soft food you may need to go back a stage for a few days & that ‘s okay. Sometimes we’re ( our tummies) just aren’t ready & healed enough yet to tolerate the more & more dense food as you progress to each new stage. Often weeks 3 & 4 are purées and then soft foods in weeks 5 & 6 but plans do differ. Trust me, it does get better and easier in time.

No. No testosterone. It can be so confusing as to what you should/need to be taking based on your needs. And it can take time to work out what & how much you need. Then your levels change & your dosage has to be adjusted again. I can’t tell you how many different combinations & doses my mother has been through. They’re trying to lower her dose again at the moment (telling her she doesn’t need any HRT at her age of almost 85). She’s not coping and having menopausal side effects again. Hope you find something to help soon.

Mine are gone too. Finally back on my combined patch so actually getting progesterone again after 5+ months (though supplies are still erratic) and I’m sleeping better, my joints are groaning and creaking when I do my stretches, etc. Never hurts to ask.

Check to see if your shakes have sugar alcohols (those that end in ‘ol’ like arthritis, sorbitol, xylitol, etc.). They can cause bloating, gas and diarrhoea. Worth checking & if they do ask your team for an alternative shake that uses another sweetener. All the best with your surgery.

You may need a higher dose of estrogen &/or some progesterone too (I know you’re on estrogen only). Joint pain, fatigue are common symptoms of low estrogen (& progesterone). Wouldn’t hurt to have a blood test to check your levels or try a higher dose. PS - My surgeon said I could continue on combined estrogen & progesterone after my hysterectomy so I won that argument after she initially said estrogen only. Yay!

Glad you’ve turned a corner. We do say it gets better & easier but it doesn’t seem like it in the beginning. And it will continue to get better too. PS - Watch the calories in the shakes you’re having between meals though. They do add up. Bone broth may be a better lower calorie alternative but still giving you protein & some flavour. Or protein water.

You know I like labneh (& am getting too lazy to make my own every time) but I found this one this morning. Yes, truffle. Can’t wait to taste it (have to finish a tub of one with fennel first). Christmas may have come early. Yum!

Yes, plans can be quite different but I agree with @ShoppGirl’s suggestion to check with your team. I was told 1/4 - 1/3 cup for a meal from purée increasing slowly to a cup of food by the 6 month mark. 7ozs pureed turkey dinner coupled with the sweet potato & cobbler & you’ve way exceeded my 6 month portion recommendation. And to add to her warning also, a lot of nerves were cut and or damaged during the surgery so messages like being full/had enough or eaten too much at going to get through or will be distorted. It’s why sticking to portion size recommendations are very important: to ensure you don’t damage your digestive system or impact your healing and recovery. It takes 6-8 weeks to fully heal.

So sorry you’ve experienced ongoing hernia problems. Hopefully they’ll be a thing of the past now. Nothing wrong with going slowly as you progress through the stages. Try one or two things & see how you go. I loved mince dishes during the soft food stage: meat balls, bolognese meat sauce, savoury mince all with lots of sauces to keep things moist. Also I made chunkier soups with meat, vegetables, lentils, beans etc. Cook things long and slow to ensure everything is well cooked and soft. The changes to your sense of smell &/or taste &/or textual aversions are temporary. Did you experience any of these when you had the sleeve? Certain textures bothered me and I became very sensitive to salty & sweet. The bad breath is associated with Ketosis. You may even experience changes in your body odour too. It too will pass. I Just keep breath mints handy. I took a toothbrush, toothpaste, mouthwash, body wipes & deodorant to work when I returned to help manage the Ketosis odours. When the body odours & bad breath go and your sense of smell, taste, etc. ‘ normalises’ again differs person to person. It may be a couple of months, a little more or a little less. All the best.

I recorded mine as the weight my GP recorded when she gave me the referral to the surgeon. To me, that was when I started to make the change to a healthier me. So put that initial 421 weight @SleeveToBypass2023. Every pound you’ve lost needs to be recognised and acknowledged.

Thank you @SleeveToBypass2023 Not bad for 59 I say. 😁 Actually I think we’re all looking pretty damn gorgeous with all our beautiful features revealed.

You’re not going to feel the restriction until you are much further along in your healing (takes around 6-8 weeks) & eating solid foods. A lot of nerves are cut or damaged during the surgery so messages simply aren’t getting through or are distorted if they do. The staged return to eating is to protect your recovery and to ensure you don’t damage your healing digestive system (think of all those sutures and staples holding your tummy together- I believe it’s around 12inches of sutures+staples with a sleeve. You should only progress your stages if your surgeon advises you to. It’s also one of the reasons why we’re advised to eat slowly and are given portion sizes we should stick to. Also remember that liquids go through the tummy much more quickly than solid food so you don’t really get full in the same way as you know sipping your shakes slowly. Purées go through a little more quickly but nothing like solid foods.

October 2018 -91kg August 2022 -49kgs (included this pxt cause I like it better & you can see no more double chin 😁😁) June 2024 - 48.5kgs

It looks good @GreenTealael so what went wrong? Just too sweet?

Oh, the slumping. Yep me too. I think it was because I didn’t have a tummy to prop me up anymore. A friend told me her husband pokes her when she’s slouching to remind her to sit or stand up straight. I don’t have a husband (ha!) so it’s become a conscious habit to check my posture regularly. I even do it when sitting on the toilet. LOL! Am I sitting/standing up straight? Are my shoulders down & back? Is my weight balanced between my feet (not leaning)? But yes, as @ms.sss suggested, work on your core muscles, glutes & back. Even simple shoulder rolls can help. Takes time to relearn & retrain your muscles though.

Congratulations on making your decision to take your life back. Only those who are obese truely understand how limiting and challenging it is as well as its impact on you psychologically and emotionally. There are a number of reasons why people undergo a revision from sleeve to bypass: they develop GERD, weight regain, don’t lose as much as they hoped. Don’t know the rate of this occurring. Doesn’t mean this will happen to yiu.I know people who have had a revision on this forum and people who haven’t. Personally I have three friends with a sleeve all between 4 & almost 7 years out and no revisions. I ‘m 5.5 yrs out with my sleeve and am happy with it & my younger brother just had one done. But we’re all different & the surgeries work in different ways to different people. Sometimes surgeons will recommend bypass over sleeve because of the weight their patient has to lose, weight loss and gain history, pre-existing conditions (like GERD, etc.), etc. Are you able to ask why the surgeon/clinic is encouraging you down the path of a sleeve rather than bypass as this is less common (more common to recommend bypass over sleeve). My cyclical side wonders if it’s because a sleeve is a less complicated surgery, takes less time to perform and sometimes doesn’t require an overnight hospital stay. So do they want you to have a sleeve because it’s less demanding on their services. Ultimately it should be your decision as to which surgery you get. Have a look at some of the you tube videos by Dr Matthew Weiner (pound of cure) & Dr John Pilcher. They cover many topics so you’ll need to work through quite a list (great resources for you post surgery) & will have some on the differences and benefits of the different surgeries. All the best.

No, I’ve watch the Canadian one and the NZ one is way worse. I ran into a contestant in the Australian version last year (in our local kitchen store). Mentioned how disappointing the NZ show was and she whispered, after checking around her, that age couldn’t watch it and if it was the Aust show she would never had entered. I liked Padma too but of course she doesn’t do it any more. Don’t mind Kristen being the new host but also a firmer winner. She seems to speak from the heart especially to the chefs and understanding what they are experiencing without excusing unsuccessful dishes. My link to Top Chef is Curtis Stone. He made breakfast in our family home kitchen a few years back and is a friend of my brother’s. He keeps inviting him to his home in Hawaii. I want to go because his wife is a friend of Sarah Michelle Gellar & I want to meet Buffy. 😁 Good luck trying your first glass of wine @Chatterboxdea. Go slowly. Oh, and don’t be surprised if you don’t enjoy it as much. Took me a while to enjoy a glass as did before surgery. Actually I still can take it or leave it.

Thank you for sharing @Bypass2Freedom. Very brave to share your emotions, experiences & hopes for your future self, Have you considered writing another letter about where you are now and what you have achieved & any new dreams you may have now?

You’re looking pretty damn good @newbegining2024. You’ve done so well. I wouldn’t worry too much about the actually number on the scale but how you feel: physically & emotionally & about your health. And, as you said, if you feel you’re about where you’d like to be you’re winning.

I have the same problem if I try to sleep on my tummy or if I twist too far over when I sleep on my side. I specifically get lower back pain but yes I think it’s hyperextending the natural arch too.

What a wonderful gift. I have her Baking Bible as an e-book. I agree straight forward easy to follow recipes (not that I bake any more ☹️). Prue talks down to everyone and o don’t like her superior upper class air that actually seems fake. Excessively pretentious. I don’t mind Alison but she can get a bit loud and over the top sometimes. But oh God yes the Aust Masterchef is appalling. Watched one episode when it began and said nope, never again. Did watch the final episode of last year’s season only because I was away with a friend and she loves it. I have no words and begged her to watch the UK version to see what it should really be like. An aunt lives it the Aust version & was very upset with my mum & I when we called it very poor copy of the original. She was adamant it began in Australia. Had to break it to her that the current UK show (with John & Greg which was when I started watching it) began in 2005 but had been around for years before that in a slightly different format. Gordon Ramsay in the face with a big cast iron frypan 🤣🤣🤣.

@BigSue is right on the mark. I will also add that not everyone reaches their goal. And that’s okay. The win is you’ve lost weight and are healthier than you were. Remember that your goal weight is an arbitrary number you chose not the weight your body settles at & is happiest at as your new set point the surgery has gifted you. The point people’s weight stabilises at is different person to person. You do tend to lose the most in the first 6-12 months but people can lose for another year. Not everyone but some do. It took about 17months for my weight to finally stabilise. Though I reached goal at 6 months I kept losing for another 11months & at a very slow rate. (Took 6 months to lose 31kg then 11 months to lose the final 11kg.) Your rate of loss will get slower and slower as you near your final stabilised weight. It could be ounces a week or even a month near the end. So you may not have finished losing yet. But do check your calorie intake. If you’re maintaining at the calories you’re consuming now you’ll have to eat less to lose more. And you will have to eat fewer calories than you are now if you want to maintain at a lower weight than you are now. Another consideration is you’ve likely built up a lot of muscle with the activity you do. Muscle does way a little more than fat and it will change your physical shape somewhat too which may explain some of the clothing size discrepancies you’re noticed. There are lots of averages and generalisations around weight loss (how fast, how much, when things will happen, how many calories you need, how much activity, etc.). We’re too different for the sane hard and fast rules to apply to everyone, You just have to find what works and is right for you, your lifestyle and your body. PS: Another average, but exercise only accounts for about 10% of the weight you are to lose. Better to look at exercise for the benefits it brings to your cardiac health, muscle strength, flexibility, bone density, etc. & not so much for weight loss.