Arabesque

Sounds a pretty okay weight loss to me especially if you experienced a stall of 1-3 weeks. You’re averting about 3lbs a week - nothing wrong with that. There is no ‘this is how much weight you must lose by this point’ rule. We all lose at our own rate. Some faster some slower. You lose at the rate that is best for you. There are averages which can be used as a guide but never a rule. Doesn’t mean you won’t lose your weight. (Don’t be influenced by the weight loss seen on tv programs. They lose large amounts in the beginning because they started at twice your weight & have lots to lose Their rate loss slows as they progress.) Is your surgeon concerned? Is your dietician concerned about your loss so far? If they’re okay you have nothing to worry about. You’re certainly not failing. You’ve lost 19 feckin’ pounds. Celebrate every pound you lose. I didn’t have to count calories & didn’t have to track my food so never had to discuss it with my dietician. I checked out of my own interest so I I know I was low calorie eater. Around 300 calories in the first month & was barely eating 900 calories by 6 months when I reached my goal. At 17 months when my weight stabilised I was eating 1300. Now I eat about 1500+/-. I was & am healthy & my blood work was is always excellent. I never could have physically eaten more than I was at any stage. But that is my story. Yours may be different & that’s okay. I’m a little taller than you & not very active (not running miles or spending hours in the gym) I don’t need the calories a taller, more active person needs. Ensure your dietician isn’t trying to fit you into the one size fits all average calorie intake box. The average calorie intake for a woman is said to be 2000 calories - I’d be the size I was before surgery if I ate that much. To lose they say I should eat 1500 so I’d never lose weight either on those recommendations.

What a wonderful attitude & approach to all you’ve been through. I’ve had a couple of small things picked up since my surgery & weight loss ( nothing like yours - though we are fibroid twins 😉) & am grateful for the medical follow ups I’ve had, the testing I’d never had before which revealed things & even how more aware I am of my body & not just put things down to being fat & therefore unimportant & my fault. Now to kicking those last 33lbs to the kerb.

Sometimes life throws crap at us from outside events or internal issues & our good intentions & good behaviours are forgotten. Doesn’t mean they’re gone forever. Sounds like you know exactly where you’re misstepping & know what you need to be doing to get back on track. That in itself is a major win. May be start slowly & adopt one or two of those changes or new behaviours for a week or two then add another one or two. Small wins, even meeting your fluid goal, are still wins. Also have you considered speaking with a therapist? They could help you work through why things started to slide & suggest strategies to help you get back on track. We can’t always do these things alone or without more professional help. All the best.

Plans can be different but the best advice is always to follow your surgeon’s plan (& never what someone on Facebook or TikTok advises who often post just for attention & shock value). The staged return to eating solid food is there to support your healing & protect your healing tummy. Remember all those staples & sutures holding your digestive system together. (Read there can be up to 10 inches of sutures - imagine that on your arm or leg 😱.) There are also many nerves cut so you can’t really tell if you are doing damage or not. It takes about 8 weeks for your tummy to fully heal post surgery. Yes the shakes can be hideous, I made myself have one a day then drank soups - comsummes, broths, creams (thin them with additional water or milk as you need & ensure they have no solid matter). Bone broths are excellent too. Blend yoghurt with milk to make a drink or make your own protein shakes using protein powder. It’s only two weeks & you’ll get through it. Many of us actually find purée stage more challenging from a texture & flavour perspective. Protein water is an option too. Gotta work at getting at least close to your daily protein goals.

Wonder if this flare up is a result of uric acid being released into your husband’s blood stream as he loses weight as it’s stored in fat much like estrogen for us? My dad was on Allopurinol for his. Took it everyday to keep his uric acid levels low. I remember him saying it was pretty awful when he first took it - made him sick (I think from excreting the excess uric acid) then it was fine. Rarely had an attack except for the very mild out break if he over indulged in seafood & alcohol.

You may be in a stall ( remember you can experience several of these while you’re losing). Also your rate of weight loss slows as you near your stabilised weight. Remember too, your weightloss does not have a steady straight line down trajectory. It goes up & down, zigs & zags, lose more one week less the next. So don’t give up yet. In saying that, yes, your medication may be a contributing factor as anti depressants are known for weight gain & increasing appetite. Have a chat with your surgeon & your prescribing doctor to be sure. There may be alternatives.

The surgery 100%. But then people here will tell you the same thing. Our individual stories may be a little different & even our motivations may not be exactly the same but what we share is that we were all obese just like you. We’re not now. Our health is better, we’re fitter, we’re able to enjoy our lives as we want to, we can do things we never thought we’d be able to do, we’re able to do more & share more with our family & friends. The risks are actually much lower than with other very commonly done surgeries & greatly less than the risks associated with obesity. Best decision I made. All the best with your decision.

I agree with @The Greater Fool. I too would wonder what do they gain by you not having the surgery & remaining overweight. Why don’t they ant you to be healthy & able to live your best life with them. Be warned they probably will tell you horror stories to scare you. Tell you about the risks. The surgical risks are lower than with an appendectomy & there are many more risks from being obese. Maybe ask the. To meet with your surgeon & your therapist so their concerns can be eased & their true issues openly discussed. Be strong & put yourself first. All the best.

I wouldn’t give up yet. You can always delay your surgery until you’re certain about your decision. Have a look at some of Dr Matthew Weiner’s you tube videos & his podcasts (available via his pound of cure website). He’s has a few about using glp-1 meds or only going down the surgery path or taking the meds in tandem with surgery. At the least it may help you with some questions to ask your team & surgeon about your way forward. The surgery requires life long changes & as does the medication. The surgery is expensive unless you’re covered by insurance. The medication is also expensive & you’ll be paying it for the rest of your life (after your insurance period ends if you’re eligible). Both have some side effects you may or may not experience or have to manage (but most things do).

I kept losing fur another 11 months after I reached my goal. For a time I couldn’t eat more than I was. I added some snacks to eat between meals & my dietician suggested adding milk powder to my milk to enrich it with more protein & more calories. (I found this too sweet so I gave up after a short time.) I was eventually able to eat larger portions but I was still eating 4-5 snacks a day by the time my weight finally stabilised. (I was eating about 1300 calories at that point.) I usually eat about 1600 calories now, about 3 snacks & have basically maintained. How I eat has been sustainable for me & doesn’t limit or restrict my life in any way. What I realised is that the weight I’m at is the weight my body gravitates to & is happiest at: my set point. It may take you some time to be able to eat the calories you need to maintain. Also your goal weight may not be your new set point (it could be higher or lower). Another point to consider is that the lowest weight you reach may not be the weight at which you stabilise. Our bodies often resettle at a higher weight. There is the possibility of the bounce back regain at around year 2 or 3. Or you adjust your eating to better support your lifestyle & consequently eat a few more calories. Try adding some additional carbs (low processed, complex whole & multi grains) some good fats, another serve of fruit, … Have a chat with your dietician too for some ways to incorporate additional but still nutrient dense foods into your eating. All the best.

I gurgle all the time with my sleeve. I say it’s my poltergeist cause it literally groans & moans & whines too. It’s just a noisy digestive system. My young nieces & nephew think it’s quite amusing, I’ve never been able to burp so I think that adds to mine. And yes I agree not feeling your restriction is likely from your nerves being cut during your revision restricting messages getting through just like after your initial sleeve surgery. Remember to keep to your recommended portion sizes until your signals can get through to ensure you’re not accidentally impacting your healing & recovery. All the best.

Christmas drinks cooking yesterday. This time Brie bites. Easy to make & yummy. Quarter teaspoon grain mustard, piece of Brie, 1/2 teaspoon cranberry sauce in puff pastry, bake then sprinkle with some pieces of grilled prosciutto. Went to what is supposed to be this excellent restaurant last week. Been wanting to go for a while but thought they only had a degustation menu & recently discovered they did have a la carte. Chose John Dory fillet with beurre blanc sauce split with wasabi leaf oil & asparagus. Started off okay but am still looking for the asparagus - extremely finely diced & barely a teaspoon. Then the third slice of the fillet was super salty & couldn’t eat it. So disappointed. My friends enjoyed their meals so at least there was that. Oh & it cost $58 (about $39 US). Crazy prices here now. Last year it would have been 10-15 Aust $ less.

They’re Creons & are a pancreatic enzyme. I take them for my protein malabsorption which began after my gall removal. I take one 25 000mg capsule 3 times a day. Started on a lower dose but it wasn’t enough. They were prescribed by the doctor who does the follow-ups for my surgeon.

We all lose at our own rate. There isn’t a date by which you must lose your weight. I always felt if my dietician & surgeon were happy I should be happy too. As @catwoman7 said the last 20lbs (about 10kg) can be the hardest & take the longest to lose. While I reached my goal at about 6 months I kept losing for another 11 months & lost another 11kgs (which was the weight my body wanted me to be at - my new set point). The last months I was losing grams each week. So, yes not everyone reaches their goal, but it may not be over for you yet. You are still losing. Remember a loss of 1-2lbs (0.5-1kg) a week is considered a healthy rate of loss. We just had a medically supervised kick start in the beginning. Congrats on your weight loss so far.

Thanks @GreenTealael. Been enjoying the bite sized (pun intended) snippets on his instagram account but hadn’t got around to listening to the complete episodes yet.

Perfectly normal, though frustrating, & an important part of your weight loss. It’s the time your body takes to say what the hell is happening (weight loss, reduced calorie intake, etc.) & then works out what it needs now. It’s when your body readjusts your digestive hormones, metabolism, etc. When your body is ready to move forward again, your weight loss will start again. Stick to your plan. Don’t stress your body (or yourself) more by making more changes than what your plan requires. And yes, you’ll likely experience more of them. Congrats on your surgery & your weight loss so far. Yay!

Pre surgical diets can differ a lot but the two shakes & one meals is not uncommon. (Mine was two weeks keto.) Generally eat pretty cleanly: no sauces (pre made or own), steamed vegetables (avoid starchy vegetables like potatoes) no processed foods, watch cooking methods of your meats - low fat. Portions sizes ate likely only 3-4oz protein & a cup of vegetables. But check with your team for what they recommend for you in regards calories, portions sizes & suitable foods for that meal. I’d look at getting a set of scales which measures small increments as soon as possible. They will be invaluable as will measuring cups, spoons & jugs.

When I was still losing & exceeding my goal, my surgeon said he thought I’d lost enough & needed to up my intake. I said I’m not deliberately trying to lose more but I could only eat what I could eat at that time & I thought the extra loss would help if I did have a regain - some wriggle room. Of course I kept losing & they stopped commenting as my surgeon & his colleague realised I was actually more finely built & my weight was okay. They prefer me to be a little more than I am currently (more 50kg) but I weigh what I weigh. I slowly started adding snacks to my intake to slow my loss as I was able. In time though I was able to eat more for a meal so I reduced my snacks until I found that balance/sweet spot to maintain. I’ll always need to snack because I generally eat pretty cleanly & therefore lower calories. Over time I’ve worked out what foods I’m better off avoiding & what foods I can only have occasionally. I’m not a calorie counter or food tracker but do random checks - it works for me. Watching what I eat & being aware of portion sizes will be a lifelong behaviour. As others have said it wouldn’t take much to start down the weight gain path. To me it comes down to what weight you feel most comfortable at, is easy to maintain & working out a way of eating to support that weight that is sustainable & doesn't restrict or affect your life/lifestyle. All the best.

I replied to your other post but I will add your shakes & broths add to your total fluid goal & sip, sip, sip all day long. I used to dilute my shakes & soups to thin them out, help the flavour a bit & also to add to my fluid intake. Plus I’d just sip them until I was finished. Didn’t care if it took me two hours to drink my shake as long as I was getting protein & fluids. And I reiterate my message in my other response: stick to your plan. It’s given to you for a reason. Now a little straight talking. This is about choice. You have chosen to go off plan. No one told you to or forced you to. The real question is not can I do/eat this but why I want to do/eat this. (I still have times I ask myself this plus do I need this or just want it.) The surgery doesn’t ‘fix’ everything. There’s a lot of hard work involved including changing your relationship with food. Working all this out takes time but you’ll get to a place you feel confident & comfortable with what you’re doing & the choices you make. Don’t be hesitant to speak to your team either. They’ve likely heard it all & will be happy to guide you - they want you to succeed too. You can get back on track. You won’t have affected your overall weight loss (we are only talking a couple of days). All the best.

I agree: ongoing support is necessary or at least knowing it’s there if you do need it. The ongoing support is the main reason I stay active on this forum plus being able to pay it back by offering others support because that can reinforce my behaviours. As is reading about others’ stories like yours. I’m also glad I still see my surgeon’s colleague for follow ups (6 monthly now) & I’m 4.5 yrs out. It’s probably more of a chatty catch up now but she is there if I ever need her. I also get the worrying over small weight gains. I find myself watching the grams/ounces & not just the kilograms/pounds some days. Before surgery I’d just shrug off any gain or simply not weigh myself so I could pretend I hadn’t gained. Now I think I’ve worked too darn hard to let my weight get away from me. But sometimes life gets in the way: you or a loved one has a health issue, you’re prescribed new meds, relationship, work, financial challenges, etc. arise, & you can’t control all those things. All you can do is decide how you manage them & their impact on your life. Maybe track your food for a while to check your food choices, portions sizes, nutritional content & whether you’re still meeting your protein & fluid goals. That way you can discover where you may have drifted off track. Then start by making one or two changes then in another week or two make another change or two until you’re back on your path. All the best.

Try exercise snacking. Multiple short bursts of exercise throughout the day. Each burst adds to your total for the day. So say 3 x 10 min sessions = 30 mins of daily exercise. Much easier to slot in your busy day. This is what I do. Try to add things during your work day like going for a walk in the your lunch break, walk/jog up any stairs you have at work. Hand weights, resistance bands are handy things to use at home at night. Some stretches (yoga based) can help you relax after work too & are great for flexibility. I have a mat on my living room floor in front of the tv. Put on Great British Bake off & do a session of stretches & bands. I also like wall push ups. (I stand about 90cm - 3 feet - from the wall & do 60.)

The plan is there for a reason - to protect all those staples & sutures holding your digestive system together & support your recovery. Remember too that a lot of nerves are cut during the surgery so messages & signals just aren’t getting through or aren’t getting through clearly so you may not know if you are hindering your recovery or doing damage or not yet. As I often say, all because you can (or think you can) doesn’t mean you should. Plans do differ but it’s always best to follow the plan you have been given. If you’re struggling with the plan then discuss with your team what options or alternatives are available to you.

Dupe post

Sometimes life just throws crap at you & I’m sorry you are the target at the moment. So it is understandable that you are trying to comfort yourself & food is the go to for many of us. Realising this is what you are doing is your first step so you already are on your way to getting back on track. I’d go back to how you were eating when you neared your final weight. This will be closest to the way of eating that best complemented your needs & lifestyle. You could start by making one or two changes a week so it’s easier to transition during this stressful time. May be start with checking your portion sizes & ensure you’re getting in your protein & fluids. Track your food so you can ensure you’re getting in your nutrients but not exceeding calories. Focus on your protein, vegetables & carbs last. Cut out the biscuits & any other snacks that may not support your weight loss. Reassess your shopping so you are purchasing predominantly nutrient dense foods. Contact your dietician for a phone appointment until you can find someone in your new location to help you refocus. I agree about finding a way to release some of your stress & tensions. Are you still finding time for yourself to do some sort of activity? Even a short walk (if the weather is okay) can help. Find a warm, quiet spot in the sun & sip a cup of tea - soothing & calming & an opportunity to breathe & relax. Doesn't matter how long it takes to refocus yourself. You’ll get there in your time. Hopefully things will turn around for you & your husband soon. All the best.

I agree. If it works for you it’s ok. Understanding what I eat & when I eat was an important learning for me. Learning & understanding what’s best for me isn’t necessarily what others do or recommend. If having a protein shake in the morning as your breakfast is fine if it works for you. Personally I’m an eat real food person & haven’t touched a shake since week 3 & started purées but that was what worked, & still does, for me. We always say follow your plan, but if it doesn’t work for you, negotiate alternatives or substitutions with your team. As long as you meet those nutrient goals. (BTW BCAA isn’t a complete protein & can’t be counted towards your protein goals. Fine to drink & count as a fluid during or post your workout but not as a source of your protein.) What & when you eat may change as you progress through your weightloss & learn more about nutrition, your body’s needs & what works best to support how you want to live & enjoy your life. All the best.