Arabesque

I still feel my restriction at more than 4.5yrs. I don’t feel it as often & it has softened a little but I think that is because I’m more aware of my portion limitations & when I’m nearing that point of not being full but having had enough, I stop. I was a low calorie eater barely eating 900 calories at 6 months & took another 11months or so to get to around 1300. Though you seem to be quite low. Have you spoken to your surgeon? If not I’d make an appointment to see what they suggest & ask for some testing to be done.. You may have a stricture, your esophagus maybe over tightening, the boogie may have been too narrow, etc. Generally these are easy to remedy usually via an endoscopy if this is what is happening. All the best.

Try to keep food moist by adding sauces & gravies. In the beginning I ate a lot of mince dishes like savoury mince & bolognese (without the pasta) & some casseroles/stews which are more on the sloppy side & are more easily eaten & digested. In time this won’t be as necessary but dry or coarse food may still cause you some issues at times. In time you will find you can drink with or closer to when you eat. This is an individual thing though - some can, some can’t. But, yes, in the first months while you’re eating so little it is vital you properly digest your foods & get every nutrient. Drinking while eating washes the food through your digestive system more quickly. This video helps explain it: In the beginning I used to sip on my shakes & soups for ages. I’d dilute them to thin them out & because they count as liquids you are helping to ensure you meet your fluid goals too. I didn’t have more serves than I was supposed to & this is an important consideration. There will be times when you have to make the best choice possible from the food you have available. For example you could have eaten the broth & not the martza balls in the deli soup or strained it when you got home. If you’re cooking you choose the ingredients you add so you could just not put potatoes or rice in the chicken soup you made. In the beginning this can be even more difficult because of your limitations but there are ways around it. Taking food with you to eat is often the easiest. Remember too that as well as all the sutures & staples holding your tummy together, a lot of nerves were cut so messages aren’t getting through or aren’t getting through in the same way so you may not know if you are actually doing damage. It takes about 8 weeks to fully heal so it is important to stick to your plan in regards to food choices, portion sizes, etc. It’s there to protect your healing tummy & support your recovery. This may seem a lot & it does take time to work it all out. We all slip or not make the best choice at some time. It’s all part of the learning. You just have to not make it a regular thing. You’ve got this. All the best.

Try consommés or broths like bone both. You can get them in tins or fresh in deli sections so easy heat & eat. They will still have some protein too. You could also strain a wonton soup & drink the broth alone. These can be handy in the post surgery liquid stage too as an alternative to shakes. All the best with your surgery.

At two months I was slowly trying a variety of meats. Just made sure they were tender & moist & had a sauce or gravy. I was allowed to eat most cooked vegetables (except potatoes) though struggled with the flavour of some because my tastebuds were still weird & that can be a real challenge. Could only eat a little bit like a small cauliflower floret or two green beans. Will your family know about your surgery & would the bride/groom be willing to tell you what will be on the menu before hand so you could try a few things before? I would avoid chicken breast as it is renown for causing issues (too dry), anything char grilled or well done steak. Would also pack a shake &/or soup you can easily make up or keep in a thermal pack just in case. Can be hard to judge how much you will have lost by then as rate of loss differs & starting weight influences how much you may lose too. I started at 200lbs & lost pretty consistently. I’d lost about 12kg (26lbs) & was a good dress size almost two down at 2 months. I had a 40th birthday around that time & I bought a loose dress (not floaty more it nicely fell). I could easily belt it & was still able to wear it two months later. It became my ‘good dress’ for a while. Maybe look for something as close to the wedding as possible & go for something with an elastic waist, can be belted, or easily taken in if needed so you can wear it for a while after.

Lots of nerves are cut during the surgery so messages either don’t get through or feel different until you’re fully healed (about 8 weeks). It’s why it’s important to stick to our plans, portion size recommendations, to eat/drink slowly & listen to our bodies carefully. When they do return you’ll be more conscious of them & may find they are different to what you knew. For example, you’ll discover your signals for real hunger vs head hunger are different (no cravings for a specific food, flavour or texture, & I feel restless) with real hunger). Some people sneeze or their nose runs when they’re close to feeling full or had enough. The tightness across your upper chest (makes me want to thump my chest to alleviate it - it doesn’t) is your restriction. This usually doesn’t kick in until you’re on solid food & your nerves are more fully healed. Yours may have started early. It’s usually your signal you’ve eaten too much &/or too quickly. Remember your tummy is quite small now, it doesn’t extend as low down in your abdomen & it doesn’t take much to fill it. Sometimes certain foods can set it off too if they sit more heavily in your tummy. It’s considered a benefit of the surgery. It can fade in intensity over time (years) & we also get better at understanding how much we can eat & so don’t feel it as often which really is the goal. All the best.

Are you sure it’s gas? Are you able to burp to relieve it? (I can’t burp so gas can be very uncomfortable for me.) Maybe best to go to your nearest medical centre to make sure everything is okay.

Has anything changed? New medication? Lifestyle change? Has a little complacency slipped in? Not as active? You’ve been through Thanksgiving & Christmas recently could they have contributed? Go back to tracking your food & fluids to check you’re meeting goals. Go back to how you were eating before you reached your lowest weight in regards to portion sizes, calories, macros, etc. Protein first, then vegetables & finally only if you’re able any carbs you’re allowed. Check in with your dietician to ensure you’re not missing something. Remember not everyone reaches their goal. The average weightloss at the three year mark is 65% of the weight you would need to lose to put you in a healthier range. You’ve got this.

Sounds like you are ready to get back on track. This is the first step. Get back in contact with your team. Your dietician to help you ensure you’re making the best decisions around food choices, portions, nutrition, etc. Your therapist to help you get back on track mentally & emotionally. You may even be a candidate for a GLP-1 medication - worth asking your surgeon or primary care doctor if you’re interested. PS. I had those you look sick/have lost too much weight comments too. Just like it takes time for your head to catch up with how you look after your weight loss, so too for other people who struggle to see you as anything but obese. It can be hard to ignore these types of comments but you have to remember to put yourself first & the only opinion that matters is yours & how you feel about yourself & your weight. Those people who were so opinionated about my weight in the beginning stopped saying anything after a few months as they started to see me for who I now was - their image of me finally changed.

Protein water was my first thought. The change in our tastebuds (& sometimes sense of smell too) can make a lot of food & drinks taste terrible, overly sweet or salty. It’s only a temporary change but can make finding something palatable difficult. . Congrats on your surgery.

Brunging up thick mucus/saliva is the foamies which can occur if you eat too much or too fast or food that is too dry or coarse. You can bring up the last bite or so of what you ate too. The possible blood could be a concern. Have you definitely ruled out anything you ate or drank? Wouldn’t hurt to check with your medical team or go to a medical centre to be sure. Better to be safe & sure.

Everyone recovers differently. One friend was back after a week, another was three weeks while I was four. Is it possible to extend your leave if you need, or return part time or with reduced daily hours? Can you work partly at home? Better to have a plan in place your employers are happy with just in case you need it. All the best with your surgery.

Dr Weiner resources are great as are Dr John Pilcher’s. Bounce back regain is always a possibility in the second & third year. I believe the average is about 10lb/5kgs so that could be a possibility. This regain can be from not being as vigilant, how you were eating wasn’t sustainable (too restrictive) & didn’t allow you to live & enjoy your life as you want, a change in medication, & your body & new weight set point resettling. And yes, muscle weighs more than fat so some of the regain could be from that too. (Maybe have a dexa scan to compared your fat & muscle mass.) Start by making one or two changes to your eating & then in a week or two make another change or two. You can start small. Maybe track your food to begin. Then up your protein & fluids if you’re not meeting your goals. Adjust your portions if they have become larger. Then drop some of your sugar or carbs or swap the highly processed refined carbs for low processed multi or whole grain options. Etc. Small changes are often easier to adopt & adapt to than large all encompassing changes. Doesn't matter how long it takes you to get fully back on track.

Everyone fluctuates regardless of whether they’re trying to lose weight or not. Hormonal fluctuations, fluid retention, what we eat or drink one day compared to another, pooping, not pooping, etc. If you were like me you didn’t weigh yourself often so probably weren’t all that aware of your usual fluctuation. My usual fluctuation is about 1kg (2.2lbs) so I never worry about that weight gain or loss. It’s odd the way your body reacts. I’ve discovered I always weigh more the day I break constipation that I did when I was constipated. Your weight loss will never be a consistently straight downward line. It will zig & zag, go up & down, drop quickly one day slowly the next. As long as your weight loss trend is going down you’re golden. And yes reduce how often you weigh yourself if you find the number on the scale is messing with you.

You’ve just had a major surgery that has about a 8 week recovery so feeling low in energy, weak, lethargic, etc. is pretty normal. Remember you are consuming calories (just drinking them not eating them) & your body is burning your stored energy which you want it do. Try adding an electrolyte drink as one of your fluids for an energy boost. They can be sweet so I diluted mine - doubled the water added. I used hydralite & would sip it with my other liquids throughout the day. Listen to your body, rest if you need to & pace yourself through the day.

Puree can be tough. For some it’s a textural issue for others like me it’s a taste thing (everything tastes disgusting). You can puree a lot of things just add enough stock, milk, water, mayo, gravy, etc. to keep it the right dollopy texture/consistency. A friend told me she survived on pureed chicken with gravy. I mashed eggs with Mayo, was allowed thin instant oats, thin scrambled eggs, yoghurt, soups, etc. I tried pureeing tinned fish but blah! During soft foods I ate a lot of minced meat based dishes. Just made sure there was enough sauce/gravy to keep the meal wet. Also soft white fish, omelettes & made a couple of casseroles/stews & meat & vegetable soups. Yep, stalls can be frustrating & demoralising but remember an important step in your weight loss (when your body takes stock of your new needs & adjusts digestive hormones, metabolic rate, etc.). 17.5lbs in about 4 weeks is still pretty darn great. Even with the stall that’s an average of more than 4lbs a week. Can’t be upset with that.

I hope these work for you. I’ve been using them for almost a year now, not for the post surgical hair loss, but for menopausal thinning above my temple. Hasn’t helped yet. When I finish off this last bottle I’m not buying it again. They say you should see results in 3 months. Will be honest in that I didn’t use it every single day but I do use it 5 or 6 days a week. (It often made my hair feel a bit gloopy even though it’s not supposed to.) People swear by it so fingers crossed for you.

I stuff the top empty section of my bras with tissues. (Never thought I’d ever have to stuff my bras!) Doesn't solve the problem but fills out the gathers in the upper cup a bit. I looked into chicken fillets & post mastectomy inserts but they’re the wrong shape for our problem. Have to wear full cups as balcony bras, front opening, plunging, etc. just make the emptiness look worse & wrinkly.

As @catwoman7 said you can’t stop the hair loss you may experience. The hair on your head is already dead & would fall out as part of your usual hair loss cycle. This cycle is accelerated as a result of the surgery, restricted diet, hormonal changes, & general stress to your system. Your new hair is still growing just at its usual rate. Any supplements you take may only strengthen your new hair growth. Try looking for alternatives other than multi vitamin tablets. I found capsules easier to swallow & the coating muted the taste. There are patches (they don’t work for everyone), gummies & some vitamin supplements come in a mouth spray formulation (I take vitamin D/K in winter via a mouth spray - doesn’t really have a taste). Mine are from an Australian company which I don’t believe is available in the US.

I’ll start with your water issue. Our bodies need water/fluids. Keeps our blood flowing & therefore blood pressure lower, aids flushing toxins out of our bodies, aids brain function, reduce headaches, boosts energy levels, flushes bacteria out of our bladders & therefore reduces chance of infection, benefits your skin (dryness & wrinkling), eases constipation, etc. All because you didn’t drink that much fluid before doesn’t mean you weren’t doing the best for your body. In time your body gets used to the amount of fluid you are consuming & you won’t pee quite as often but again peeing is important. Remember feeling thirsty is a danger signal that you are in great need for fluids. You can add herbs & spices to your cooking to help boost flavour if you find that lacking. The period you are losing weight is an opportunity to try different foods, cooking styles, new recipes, etc. & to get used to eating foods that are not high in fats, sugars & salts, synthetic additives & generally eating more cleanly. You could try making your own sauces too so you control the ingredients. It can be helpful to remember the way you ate before did you no favours & lead t you choosing the surgery. Being on your current diet doesn’t mean you can’t go out or socialise with family & friends. It’s about making the best choices you can with options available. It’s not something you do every day but if once in a while you aren’t able to eat 100% of what you should is okay. I went to a Chinese restaurant with my mum & old family friends at around 4 months. I chose chicken & cashews & picked at the chicken & vegetables to my appropriate portion draining off what sauce I could. While everyone was sharing all the dishes I stuck to just mine. I took the leftovers home & we ate it the next day or two. I went to restaurants (casual & fine dining), birthday parties, reunions, general social gatherings,… all while I was losing. If I had to contribute food, I made something I could eat. For example at the reunion I made a zucchini bake. All cause you can’t eat something like Christmas cookies, doesn’t mean you can’t still make & share them with your family. You don’t have to eat them. This will be something that happens after your weight loss too when you work out how you will eat to maintain. I don’t eat cakes, biscuits, sweets, desserts yet today I made banana bread with my nieces & nephew. We had lots of fun & they all ate some & took the rest home. I didn’t care I didn’t eat any & neither did they (more for them 😁). Socialising isn’t only about eating & drinking. It’s really about spending time with people you love & care about. You don’t have to give up on your life.

I’ve been fortunate in that my family has been quietly supportive. No one really says anything & in some cases will offer alternatives. Whenever others are hosting, I don’t make a fuss about what I can or can’t eat just make the best choices I can from the options. I’ve become adept of putting a little taste of a variety of food on my plate & saying thank you but I’m fine or this is plenty for now, maybe later. I happily sit there with my half empty plate while others’ are overflowing. I do allow myself a little more flexibility at Christmas: it is only one day a year. What’s funny is that I make most of the Christmas desserts yet I very rarely eat sweets any more. This is really the only day I do & choose a little bite or two of the things I enjoy most. So many equate socialising with eating & drinking but really socialising is about being with people you love (or tolerate in regards to certain family members 😉). Instead of eating, talk with those you’re with.

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Easy? Ha! Weight loss surgery is not easy. People who say this are speaking from ignorance. The diet, the psychological work, working out a new way of eating that suits you & your needs, introducing more activity into your life, … And there is the life long work to maintain your weight loss - it’s much easier for an obese person to regain weight than it is for someone who was overweight or who lost a few pounds. Obesity is a disease for a reason & those demons that lead us down that path are still there. We just learn how to understand & manage them better & change our relationship with & dependence on food. Many of the benefits of the surgery, which kick start our weight loss, fade over time. We are able to eat more, our restriction weakens, our appetite returns. That’s when the real work begins. To me the most important benefit of the surgery was that during the time of no appetite, strong restriction, etc, I had the time to do the head work about my relationship with food, eating behaviours, & work out a new way of eating, I never worked as hard with losing weight & then maintaining my weight as I have since my surgery. It is so very much worth it though.

I had reflux before my sleeve surgery. It was mild & I managed it through dietary choices. Only needed to take esomepraole 3 or 4 times a year (usually when I had too many champagnes or G&Ts). My surgeon & I discussed my situation & he decided to proceed with the sleeve because I managed my reflux & it was mild but he would have done bypass if I wanted, After surgery I take esomeprazole everyday & I always will. My reflux manifests itself a little differently now - more burning in my throat but way less incidences of the hideous hiccups & bad taste in my mouth. I would question a surgeon who will only do a sleeve regardless of your gerd which usually means sleeve is not for you. Are there any surgeons in a neighbouring city who will take your insurance & you could meet with?