ms.sss

When it comes to virtually any human behavior or endeavor there are people that from the very first exposure love it more than life itself and those that believe it is the worst thing in existence and can't grasp the appeal. Many of the former simply can't understand the latter's aversion and vice versa. There are people that take up behaviors or endeavors they hate in order to fit in just as there people that avoid behaviors or endeavors to fit in. And those that do or don't do things to not fit in.
We all only have the actual experience of what is going on in our heads. We have no experience of what other people experience in their heads. This is a major stumbling point of being human. If another person seems to love a behavior or experience as much as I do I still can't know their experience. Nor can I experience their hate or disgust. We are each stuck in our own heads.
Empathy can only get us so far. Empathy allows us to intellectually understand that people have reasons for doing things just as I have reasons for doing similar or analogous things. Empathy doesn't cause me to experience what another person experiences.
So, while I intellectually understand there are different strokes for different folks, I will never experience those different strokes the same as different folks.
People are freaks. Well, not me of course.
Good luck,
Tek

yay! can't wait to see ur awesome results!

being on these forums long enough i would assume that one should realize by now that everyone is different. we say/post it multiple times a day, every day.
i don't like weight lifting . it's don't like olives. i don't like talking about my wls.
others don't feel the same way. i get that.
we are all different people getting our own versions of joy. i may not make the same connections to things as you do, and thats cool.
i mean, some people have sex every day while others don't. some people weigh themselves every morning others don't. some people read books while others don't.
why do people drink too much and become alcoholics? alcohol is so gross. this line if thinking is the close sibling to why do people eat too much and get fat? being fat is so gross. to paraphrase you: "but how did you get to the point where <eating> was enjoyable enough to do it often <that u end up being 300 lbs>?"
the incredulity in your post is loud and clear...but really, if u think about it, its not that impossible to understand (especially from the point of view from a person who was morbidly obese)
your intention may be not to sound judgy...but in my very insignificant opinion, you kinda do.
but i mean, you are entitled to say whatever you want. i guess i just wanna ask you to take a pause and reflect on how ur post may or may not have come across.
sorry. 😔
i don't normally weigh in this heavily in anonymous internet chats as i hate confrontation, but this touched a wee nerve for me.
(i may just delete this post after i overthink it to death...we shall see...i have already edited this post a gazillion times in my overthinking, ha.)

hmmm...you could always try it, and, if it doesn't work for you say, after 3-4 weeks, then just go back to what DOES work?
or, if it's causing you too much angst, and your current M.O. is not causing you any issues (which sounds like it isn't), why fix what ain't broke?
there is no one-size fits all prescription...find out what works for you and go with that.
good luck! ❤️

hmmm...you could always try it, and, if it doesn't work for you say, after 3-4 weeks, then just go back to what DOES work?
or, if it's causing you too much angst, and your current M.O. is not causing you any issues (which sounds like it isn't), why fix what ain't broke?
there is no one-size fits all prescription...find out what works for you and go with that.
good luck! ❤️

ok, gonna throw my story on the table...take from it as you will, as a lesson to live by, a cautionary tale, or a personal justification...you choose.
pre surgery i was also a weekend warrior, actually, more like a yearly quarterly warrior, lol. i had like a couple drinks every 2-3 months. probably got stupid drunk once a year or less.
during weight loss phase (which lasted 7 months) i had maybe 5 partial drinks. i don't think i finished any of those drinks. my first "drink" was 3 weeks post op. I had maybe 2-3 sips of a glass of red wine. it was really weird, i swear i could feel the burning of the alcohol pass down my esophagus, through my stomach and along my intestines. my second drink was about 1 month later (christmas) and it was a very sugary soju-sake drink. again i had maybe 2-3 sips but this one resulted in my second worst dumping experience ever. *shudder*. the next 3 or so drinks were vodka or gin sodas (learned my lesson! less sugar!)
ok. now its 2019, im in maintenance and i'm looking hawt and feeling awesome and me and mr. go on a couple vacations and i drink way more than i normally do. but its vacation, right? so its ok. i also took up smoking again after being smoke free for 10 years (but thats another story).
now its 2020 and its effing covid, and i, like many others i know started drinking at home (i never did this before, i was always a go-out drinker)
...and now its 2024 and i drink every day. i don't get stupid drunk every day or anything (not that i'm trying to justify anything - i fondly call myself a high-functioning alcoholic), but i do drink every day. its at a point where others (i.e., my doctors and my hubs) are chastising me with the amount i drink. i know i drink too much and its probably doing a number on my health despite nothing showing up on any of my labs or whatever. i quit drinking for a month last year because my son said i couldn't stop drinking for a week. so i know i can stop (or at least slow down) if i really wanted to. trouble is i don't seem to really want to. last year, my OBGYN said i really should stop smoking AND drastically cut down the amount i drink. i told her i'm not sure i could do both, so i made her a deal and said i would stop smoking. i'm proud to say i have been smoke free for 9 months (after smoking for 4 years after quitting for 10, after smoking for 20...say that ten times fast, lol). its been surprisingly easy, but i think its because i can still drink.
ANYWAY.
i'm hoping to get into a mindset soon to address my drinking problem. i don't doubt my ability to reduce, but i'm not sure i will actually WANT to anytime soon. le sigh.
so there you have it. i am the poster child of transfer addiction.
despite all this, my weight has more or less remained unchanged (go figure). i continue to stay below goal weight this entire time.
....and i am literally typing this post out with an espresso martini in hand.
dont judge me! lol. i am relatively chill about all this so even if you do judge me, i wont take it personally.
p.s. oh, i should also mention that i get "affected" real quick and on very small amounts. and i also sober up real quick. this phenomenon is a purely post surgery thing. i needed lots more to get drunk before surgery....although my smaller size now may also be a factor....

hmmm...you could always try it, and, if it doesn't work for you say, after 3-4 weeks, then just go back to what DOES work?
or, if it's causing you too much angst, and your current M.O. is not causing you any issues (which sounds like it isn't), why fix what ain't broke?
there is no one-size fits all prescription...find out what works for you and go with that.
good luck! ❤️

well...funny how reading about others' drinking frequency seems to make me think i'm not that problematic after all?
i was under the impression that i drank alot...but i guess daily drinking is not that uncommon????

Sigh...yeah. I never dated much due to insecurity and not getting much attention from the fellas. I've lost 110 pounds and joined Match to as a gift to myself to finally get out there and date...I've learned that my cat is truly my favorite companion. [emoji16]

Sent from my SM-N950U using BariatricPal mobile app

1- F/51/5’1
2- 12 lb
3- 230
4- 1 month post 212
5- 3 month post 180

being on these forums long enough i would assume that one should realize by now that everyone is different. we say/post it multiple times a day, every day.
i don't like weight lifting . it's don't like olives. i don't like talking about my wls.
others don't feel the same way. i get that.
we are all different people getting our own versions of joy. i may not make the same connections to things as you do, and thats cool.
i mean, some people have sex every day while others don't. some people weigh themselves every morning others don't. some people read books while others don't.
why do people drink too much and become alcoholics? alcohol is so gross. this line if thinking is the close sibling to why do people eat too much and get fat? being fat is so gross. to paraphrase you: "but how did you get to the point where <eating> was enjoyable enough to do it often <that u end up being 300 lbs>?"
the incredulity in your post is loud and clear...but really, if u think about it, its not that impossible to understand (especially from the point of view from a person who was morbidly obese)
your intention may be not to sound judgy...but in my very insignificant opinion, you kinda do.
but i mean, you are entitled to say whatever you want. i guess i just wanna ask you to take a pause and reflect on how ur post may or may not have come across.
sorry. 😔
i don't normally weigh in this heavily in anonymous internet chats as i hate confrontation, but this touched a wee nerve for me.
(i may just delete this post after i overthink it to death...we shall see...i have already edited this post a gazillion times in my overthinking, ha.)

I hope I don't come across as rude when I write this but everyone has different likes or dislikes and you clearly say you have never liked alcohol from the outset so good for you but the post does come across as judgmental. If someone likes to have a drink it is up to them as adults to do as they wish, be it too many calories etc. It is everyone's choice to make if they would like to have a drink (alcoholic or non-alcoholic) and deal with the consequences, if there are any like weight gain, reflux, dumping etc.
Do you like eggs? I don't like the smell or taste of them so why do you eat them? Just making the point!

Why don't you like all the foods and drinks I like? I can't see how you don't like something I find so enjoyable.
Different strokes for different folks.
Good luck,
Tek

ok, gonna throw my story on the table...take from it as you will, as a lesson to live by, a cautionary tale, or a personal justification...you choose.
pre surgery i was also a weekend warrior, actually, more like a yearly quarterly warrior, lol. i had like a couple drinks every 2-3 months. probably got stupid drunk once a year or less.
during weight loss phase (which lasted 7 months) i had maybe 5 partial drinks. i don't think i finished any of those drinks. my first "drink" was 3 weeks post op. I had maybe 2-3 sips of a glass of red wine. it was really weird, i swear i could feel the burning of the alcohol pass down my esophagus, through my stomach and along my intestines. my second drink was about 1 month later (christmas) and it was a very sugary soju-sake drink. again i had maybe 2-3 sips but this one resulted in my second worst dumping experience ever. *shudder*. the next 3 or so drinks were vodka or gin sodas (learned my lesson! less sugar!)
ok. now its 2019, im in maintenance and i'm looking hawt and feeling awesome and me and mr. go on a couple vacations and i drink way more than i normally do. but its vacation, right? so its ok. i also took up smoking again after being smoke free for 10 years (but thats another story).
now its 2020 and its effing covid, and i, like many others i know started drinking at home (i never did this before, i was always a go-out drinker)
...and now its 2024 and i drink every day. i don't get stupid drunk every day or anything (not that i'm trying to justify anything - i fondly call myself a high-functioning alcoholic), but i do drink every day. its at a point where others (i.e., my doctors and my hubs) are chastising me with the amount i drink. i know i drink too much and its probably doing a number on my health despite nothing showing up on any of my labs or whatever. i quit drinking for a month last year because my son said i couldn't stop drinking for a week. so i know i can stop (or at least slow down) if i really wanted to. trouble is i don't seem to really want to. last year, my OBGYN said i really should stop smoking AND drastically cut down the amount i drink. i told her i'm not sure i could do both, so i made her a deal and said i would stop smoking. i'm proud to say i have been smoke free for 9 months (after smoking for 4 years after quitting for 10, after smoking for 20...say that ten times fast, lol). its been surprisingly easy, but i think its because i can still drink.
ANYWAY.
i'm hoping to get into a mindset soon to address my drinking problem. i don't doubt my ability to reduce, but i'm not sure i will actually WANT to anytime soon. le sigh.
so there you have it. i am the poster child of transfer addiction.
despite all this, my weight has more or less remained unchanged (go figure). i continue to stay below goal weight this entire time.
....and i am literally typing this post out with an espresso martini in hand.
dont judge me! lol. i am relatively chill about all this so even if you do judge me, i wont take it personally.
p.s. oh, i should also mention that i get "affected" real quick and on very small amounts. and i also sober up real quick. this phenomenon is a purely post surgery thing. i needed lots more to get drunk before surgery....although my smaller size now may also be a factor....

well...funny how reading about others' drinking frequency seems to make me think i'm not that problematic after all?
i was under the impression that i drank alot...but i guess daily drinking is not that uncommon????

ok, gonna throw my story on the table...take from it as you will, as a lesson to live by, a cautionary tale, or a personal justification...you choose.
pre surgery i was also a weekend warrior, actually, more like a yearly quarterly warrior, lol. i had like a couple drinks every 2-3 months. probably got stupid drunk once a year or less.
during weight loss phase (which lasted 7 months) i had maybe 5 partial drinks. i don't think i finished any of those drinks. my first "drink" was 3 weeks post op. I had maybe 2-3 sips of a glass of red wine. it was really weird, i swear i could feel the burning of the alcohol pass down my esophagus, through my stomach and along my intestines. my second drink was about 1 month later (christmas) and it was a very sugary soju-sake drink. again i had maybe 2-3 sips but this one resulted in my second worst dumping experience ever. *shudder*. the next 3 or so drinks were vodka or gin sodas (learned my lesson! less sugar!)
ok. now its 2019, im in maintenance and i'm looking hawt and feeling awesome and me and mr. go on a couple vacations and i drink way more than i normally do. but its vacation, right? so its ok. i also took up smoking again after being smoke free for 10 years (but thats another story).
now its 2020 and its effing covid, and i, like many others i know started drinking at home (i never did this before, i was always a go-out drinker)
...and now its 2024 and i drink every day. i don't get stupid drunk every day or anything (not that i'm trying to justify anything - i fondly call myself a high-functioning alcoholic), but i do drink every day. its at a point where others (i.e., my doctors and my hubs) are chastising me with the amount i drink. i know i drink too much and its probably doing a number on my health despite nothing showing up on any of my labs or whatever. i quit drinking for a month last year because my son said i couldn't stop drinking for a week. so i know i can stop (or at least slow down) if i really wanted to. trouble is i don't seem to really want to. last year, my OBGYN said i really should stop smoking AND drastically cut down the amount i drink. i told her i'm not sure i could do both, so i made her a deal and said i would stop smoking. i'm proud to say i have been smoke free for 9 months (after smoking for 4 years after quitting for 10, after smoking for 20...say that ten times fast, lol). its been surprisingly easy, but i think its because i can still drink.
ANYWAY.
i'm hoping to get into a mindset soon to address my drinking problem. i don't doubt my ability to reduce, but i'm not sure i will actually WANT to anytime soon. le sigh.
so there you have it. i am the poster child of transfer addiction.
despite all this, my weight has more or less remained unchanged (go figure). i continue to stay below goal weight this entire time.
....and i am literally typing this post out with an espresso martini in hand.
dont judge me! lol. i am relatively chill about all this so even if you do judge me, i wont take it personally.
p.s. oh, i should also mention that i get "affected" real quick and on very small amounts. and i also sober up real quick. this phenomenon is a purely post surgery thing. i needed lots more to get drunk before surgery....although my smaller size now may also be a factor....

keep trying different ways of drinking Water until you find one that you can tolerate...and even when you do find one way that works, you find that later on it doesn't and you need to find another type/kind.
I started off with room temp water for about a week (just worked out that way cuz i carried around a water bottle that i took microsips from and it just ended up being room temp lol)
then switched to warm/hot water for about 2 months cuz that's all i could stand. i found i could drink much much more at a hotter temp vs cold.
then warm/hot fell out of favour, and i HAD to have it ice, ice cold...with like crushed ice in it even (not cubed, CRUSHED!). this went on for another couple months.
then i was all about carbonated water (like perrier), and i drank just that until i reached goal and for several months afterwards.
now i don't seem to have a glaring preference, but i do seem to lean towards ice water, if i had to pick one.

i'm 5+ years out.
i love food and everything about it (many on here know this about me already). i love the cooking, baking, making, plating, shopping, researching, testing recipes of it all. i love to watch all the tv cooking shows, all the travel food shows, all the cooking/baking/grilling competition shows. i like to look at pictures of food, smell it, take pictures and videos of it, watch people eat the stuff i make for them. one of my favourite pasttimes it to read restaurant menus in their entirety...like multiple times. i am always down to go out for food and drinks at restaurants/bars with fam and friends, i am always so excited to come up with my contribution(s) to pot-luck parties. love love trying out new restaurants...i have a list of bucket list restaurants around the world i am determined to visit.
...and i love to eat. but to be more precise, i love to TASTE. so small plate venues (dim sum, tapas, izakaya, etc) and tasting menus and pot luck parties are my fave: an abundance of choice and low commitment to just a single large entree. i have will taste all the "good stuff" (easy on the side dishes as they take up too much stomach real estate) and be perfectly happy.
a.k.a. JOY lol.
the one difference with how i enjoy food now is i no longer feel joy with the stuffing of myself. i have vague memories of actually feeling GOOD with a distended belly bursting with something i ate. Now its the opposite. the feeling of being full is very unpleasant to me (to put it mildly). and i think this is key, now that i think of it....
long story short, joy is still on the table...its just up to you where you find it.

i had low grade anxiety the morning of surgery.
i remember a nano-second of PURE PANIC literally just before i was knocked out. I remember them telling me to count down from 100 (or was it 10?)...i got to like 97 (or 7..) and felt myself starting to freak out. the last thing i (sorta) remember was 95 (or 5??)
next thing i knew i was waking up in the recovery room and my very first thought was "YEESSSSSSSS!!! I'M ALIVE!!!!!". the relief of it all allowed me to ignore whatever pain i may or may not have been in. when i did finally register pain, it was manageable. i took the hard stuff pain meds during my 1 day stay at hospital. i was sent home with an Rx for more, but didn't fill it...i was fine with just Tylenol. best description of it would be it felt like i did a ridiculous number of situps...more of an ache than a pain, if that makes sense.
so yeah, alot of us had at least some level of fear/anxiety/trepidation.
only way is through it!
good luck ❤️

keep trying different ways of drinking Water until you find one that you can tolerate...and even when you do find one way that works, you find that later on it doesn't and you need to find another type/kind.
I started off with room temp water for about a week (just worked out that way cuz i carried around a water bottle that i took microsips from and it just ended up being room temp lol)
then switched to warm/hot water for about 2 months cuz that's all i could stand. i found i could drink much much more at a hotter temp vs cold.
then warm/hot fell out of favour, and i HAD to have it ice, ice cold...with like crushed ice in it even (not cubed, CRUSHED!). this went on for another couple months.
then i was all about carbonated water (like perrier), and i drank just that until i reached goal and for several months afterwards.
now i don't seem to have a glaring preference, but i do seem to lean towards ice water, if i had to pick one.

1. [Gender] Female
    [Age @ Surgery]  29 yo
    [Height] 5’5”
2. [Starting] 272 lbs | 7 lb loss 
3. [Surgery Day] 265 lbs 
4. [1 Month] 245 lbs 
5. [3 Months] 226 lbs 
6. [6 Months] 210 lbs 
7. [11 Months]  166 lbs 
8. [Surgery Type] Bypass

Today marks my one year anniversary of my VSG. This was the best gift I could have given myself.
As promised, I am back to give my 12 month update. I hope all will follow up with status updates so the results can be tabulated.

1. Basics: GENDER, AGE (at time of surgery) , HEIGHT - F, 62, 5'5"
2. Total Weight lost in the 6 months BEFORE surgery (if any) - 6.5 LBS
3.Weight on DAY OF SURGERY. - 202.5 LBS
4. Weight at 1 MONTH POST surgery - 187.4 LBS
5. Weight at 3 MONTHs POST surgery - 170.8 LBS
6. Weight at 6 MONTHs POST surgery - 149.2 LBS
7. Weight at 12 MONTHs POST surgery - 134.2 LBS

1- F ,40,5.4”
2- 0
3- 198lbs
4- 185lbs
5- 170lbs
6- 158lbs
7 - may 2024 is 1 year

Don't know if you're still working on this or not, but I just passed my 1 year anniversary of my surgery so thought I would share my numbers.

1. Basics: GENDER, AGE, HEIGHT
Male, 32, 5' 6"
2. Total Weight lost in the 6 months BEFORE surgery (if any)
24 lbs.
3. Weight on DAY OF SURGERY.
389
4. Weight at 1 MONTH POST surgery
358
5. Weight at 3 MONTHs POST surgery
320
6. Weight at 6 MONTHs POST surgery
275
7. Weight at 12 MONTHs POST surgery
217
8. Type of Surgery (Sleeve, ByPass, etc...)
Bypass

1. Basics: GENDER, AGE, HEIGHT
F, 52 at time of surgery, 5'3"
2. Total Weight lost in the 6 months BEFORE surgery (if any)
12.2 lbs
3. Weight on DAY OF SURGERY.
254.6
4. Weight at 1 MONTH POST surgery
235.7
5. Weight at 3 MONTHs POST surgery
216.7
6. Weight at 6 MONTHs POST surgery
192.5
7. Weight at 1 YEAR POST surgery
TBD