Liz The New Me

You could literally have the perfect xyz and someone who is COMPLETELY incompatible with you will find all the faults in the world
Likewise you could be a hotmess of stretch marks, batwings, crow's feet & melty parts but the RIGHT person will think you're the one they have been waiting for their entire lives
Choose the ones that will always choose you

I agree with @ms.sss that the confidence boost after surgery plays a huge part. I'm still working toward my goal weight, I've got saggy bits, and my boobs have DISAPPEARED but my husband is more attracted to me than ever. I don't have the hang-ups about my body that I did 80 pounds ago. I'm energetic, which means better sex for both of us. I initiate sex more and I'm not shy about being in weird positions that before I would have thought I was too fat for. XD
I'm rooting for you, best of luck on your journey!

Sex is sooooo much better when I'm thinner.
And even with looser skin, I am waaaay hotter than when I was obese. And not just because I am thinner, but because I am more CONFIDENT and sure of myself, and the weight loss was a big part in re-cultivating that.
You are really worried about how you will feel/look after weight loss (I notice this is your second post on the topic ♥️). But are you happy with your situation right now? I'm guessing that you aren't since you are moving forward with the surgery.
Change is scary. But if you put in the effort, it will totally be worth it. 100%. ♥️

Don’t worry about it! Whoever is gonna love you will love you anyway. I didn’t get my surgery yet and I’m also a little bit concerned about loose skin. Some insurance pay for plastic surgery when your weight stabilized after Bariatric surgery. Do it for you, you will feel great and will irradiate that.

Mine aren't firming up no matter how many arm exercises I do, so I'm just choosing to live with them. I like bats. 🙂

I got up over 1000 kcal about a year after surgery but continued to lose weight (albeit slowly) until I was around 18-20 months out. I started increasing my calories then to find my sweet spot, since my body fat percentage was getting too low (I knew this because I'd had a DEXAscan) - I knew it was time to enter maintenance. It's hard to increase calories, though. I never thought when I was in weight loss mode that I could eat more than 1500 kcal a day tops, but I maintain on about 1700 (which is what I aim for every day) - and obviously, I did eventually make it up there. Just add around 100 kcal a day (maybe by adding a healthy fat - like a tablespoon of peanut butter) and wait a couple weeks to see if it makes a difference. If not, then add another 100 kcal. Rinse and repeat. You do have to go gradually, because going from like 1000 to 1500 or more calories a day would be tough.

Since working out with weights 3 times a week, my arm muscles actually look pretty good! But........ batwings are hanging underneath! I am going to wait a year after goal and then see how my self image is. If I am still too embarrassed to wear sleeveless tanks (this IS Arizona, afterall), I may consider plastics at that time. But I want to give my psyche a chance to come to grips with the situation. Who knows? A year post goal and I may just say, "To heck with it - these are MY arms and I earned 'em. No one else's opinion matters."

Any ladies out there have success with building muscle/toning arms? Looking for the best exercises to do to try to get rid of my batwings. Or at least make them less noticeable. Before and after pics would be appreciated as well! Show your progress off! Thanks!

I've been desperately hunting down shirts with sleeves just long enough to cover them!!! LOL

I’m following this because I’m going to need it in a month or 2, the idea of maintenance scares me.

So thought I'd start this thread for those who are currently in maintenance (or are trying to be ), there are not as many active maintenance-ers on here, but I'm hoping for the ones that are, they can chime in and impart their wisdom for those are trying to achieve that coveted balance of weight stability.
...or we can just chat about whatever. LOL.

Same. By PCP/surgeon/gym-addicted friends all say the only way I can get rid of my bat wings is to (a) gain all my weight back (b) work out my arms to build enough muscle to fill in the empty space my fat left (c) get plastics.
Since (a) is a deal-breaker, and (b) will result in me looking like a young Schwarzenegger (I have ALOT of empty space!), I decided on (c)...which I officially have booked for this year.
No pics from me either.

Can't wait until I get to goal so I can go to the plastic surgeon and be rid of my bat wings. No amt of exercise is going to get rid of mine...sorry no pictures.

It is so cute, enjoy it! I bought a new swimsuit back in February, but I am hoping once it gets closer to swim time, I will need something smaller yet. (Fingers crossed!) I personally don't think I could ever buy a swimsuit online - I am too awkwardly shaped, I need the easy access to exchange if needed. I hope it works out for you!

I never worried about being seen in a bathing suit, even at my heaviest. I enjoy the pool, so I didn't care what other people thought.

Most of my swimming is in lakes and creeks while hiking/backpacking or kayaking. So what I wear needs to be adventure ready. I have some new swim trunks that are like bike shorts, sports bra, and an athletic top that dries fast. That’s if there are other people around. If it’s just us, then the sports bra and shorts come off, as just undies and the light top will dry faster.
I love tankinis, and have a couple. I just never end up using them.

I agree the DGAF attitude is best. If you wait for perfection then you miss life. Anyway, have you see some of the men they don't worry! Every year my big concern is will I be able to get up the ladder onto the boat or will I have to swim home.

My thighs are totally not ready for prime time, saggy skin city! But I haven't worn any bottoms over them, I guess I just DGAF. 🤣 (I'm not sure why I will show my saggy thighs, but never my saggy tummy, hmmmm)

All of them

I bought a few cute and affordable ones from Amazon (and easily returnable if they don't fit!)
https://smile.amazon.com/YOU-Swimsuits-Control-Backless-Swimsuit/dp/B07B4BQHYW?ref_=w_bl_sl_ap_ap_web_17413424011
https://smile.amazon.com/B2prity-Swimwear-Backless-Monokini-Swimsuits/dp/B07BKSNH7Q?ref_=w_bl_sl_ap_ap_web_18702476011
https://smile.amazon.com/Ekouaer-Vintage-Bikini-Monokinis-Swimsuit/dp/B07194VB6R?ref_=w_bl_sl_ap_ap_web_10797138011&th=1

LOL All the bathing suits I have are 18/22 so I went on smile.amazon and found this one. Because of my extra skin bat arms.. Now I'm not that tall so there is no big gap between the top and bottom, so it is almost looking like a one piece. I LOVE IT I does run small I'm a size 10 now I ordered a XL. I can't wait to wear it next week.

You have lost a lot of weight, congratulations!
We had surgery a month apart and I’m in the home stretch. I looked up 20 pounds ago and that was February 12th, so about 3.5 months or so. After a lackluster March I joined a gym with a personal trainer, bought a Fitbit, tightened up my diet and started participating on this website. I personally think working out and staying active is the key and will remain the key forever.
If you want to join us for the June challenge come on over to this thread. Nothing is required, just motivation and support.
here is the link
June Challenge

the last 20 lbs takes forever!! Also when I gain weight now (fortunately I catch it before it gets out of control), it also takes forever to take it off. I think it took two months to lose the 5 lb gain I had over the holidays. I can understand now why skinny people complain about losing 5 or 10 lbs (I used to think they were nuts!!)

So tell me about your last 20lbs or so. I’d like to lose another 15 but it is sloooooow even though I’m still in the first year. Tips and advice are greatly appreciated.

LOL All the bathing suits I have are 18/22 so I went on smile.amazon and found this one. Because of my extra skin bat arms.. Now I'm not that tall so there is no big gap between the top and bottom, so it is almost looking like a one piece. I LOVE IT I does run small I'm a size 10 now I ordered a XL. I can't wait to wear it next week.