Missouri-Lee's Summit

Do your research locally. I found a very competent bariatric surgeon close by. He even taught other surgeons how to do many of the procedures. Being far from home, especially when things seem so new and different, is probably not a good idea. It sounds like you have your heart set on these two doctors. May I ask why? Have you fulfilled all the pre-op requirements (usually insurance carrier requirements)? The requirements are often different depending on the insurance company, the doctor---maybe even the state. (Michigan must have many fine doctors to chose from.) I'm starting to equate my gastric bypass with my four childbirth deliveries. I know I was there and went through everything, but I have a hard time remembering all the details. I just know that I am happier, healthier, and a lot thinner after having my gastric bypass. My only ongoing complaint is that my sense of smell and taste never returned to my pre-surgery status.

Maybe that was it... the hostile environment around here. I didn't like the in-fighting among people who should have been more supportive of one another and nonjudgmental. Some people just gave off toxic bully vibes, while others insisted on being the center of every conversation-- plus being the only voice that mattered. Who needed that?! It appears that many of those folks have moved on or were escorted to the door. At any rate, I look forward to reacquainting myself with the site, and to making new friends who may benefit from the support of those of us who may have relevant bariatric experiences to share.

I left this site abruptly two years ago (I no longer remember why). Has anyone else disappeared and then returned? I think I was curious. Did I still need the support of like-minded people who'd be able to empathize with any issues that surrounded my gastric bypass? I think I also miss the socialization. Can anyone else relate? Sadly, I need to refresh myself with the settings and the how-tos of the site. Forgive me if I accidentally break bariatricpal while trying to reclaim my "skills."

I, too, read your entire post. Never apologize for too many words or thoughts. We get it. Like some of the others, I wish I had something comforting to say that would be of benefit to you. All I can offer is my empathy for your struggle. I have a sparkly magic wand, but it no longer works. I got cheated by those stupid Dollar Store people!

Are you afraid that you won't wake up? I often look forward to the anesthesia. Silly, I know. I play this game with myself. I will myself while they are about to put me under that I refuse to "fall asleep." I always end up in the recovery room, diappointed that I lost. It is so instantaneous. You are out before you can even think about it. My issues are with being strapped down or my movement being restricted in any way. (A history of childhood sexual abuse.) I always request that I not be strapped to the table until AFTER I am unconscious. That's just my thing. Perhaps your fear is with all the prep and questions asked of the nurse anesthetist or anesthesiologist. Admit to them that you are anxious. Sometimes they can give you something ahead of time to reduce that anxiety. Play a more active part in your experience. Be honest about your worries. I would never downplay or discount anyone else's fears. I have plenty of my own fears. Some of them are irrational, some less so. I hope I have been helpful in some small way. I also hope that when you return you will let us know about how your experience turned out. The thing that brought me back to this site is the caring and understanding by people who've been where we've been and understand/empathsize with our struggles.

I have them. All of them. I can afford to have them as well. I understand the differences between calcium citrate and calcium carbonate. I use sublingual b12, etc. My daughter is a PharmD. Both of my sons are MDs. I often have vit D levels in the single digits, which is why I've been given 50,000 units of vit D by my endocrinologist. I'm lax on my anti-depressants as well. I'm not sure why it's this way. I know I should be taking them. I just don't feel motivated. I doesn't help to come here and not be honest. I know I should make the effort. Why did I go through all this just to endanger my health at this point? My current weight is about 189. I have yet to reach my goal of 150, which was probably unrealistic. All that skin and the kangaroo pouch from four pregnancies are here to stay. Don't get me wrong. I consider pregnancy-related scars and bulges to be the price a woman pays for amazing children. I hope that doesn't sound too corny. I fear I am rambling. I have not logged in here for a while. I even had to refresh my memory as to when I got my surgery.

I don't enjoy eating anymore. The only thing I can seem to eat or even taste is Campbell's Vegetable soup. I am not keeping up with my vitamins. I weigh around 180lbs, down from 303. I don't regret getting my bypass but I thought I'd be at a different place.

Have you been tested for Hashimoto's thyroiditis?

I didn't know what weight goal to set for myself. Initially, I came up with 130, but after considering that I've had four children and that my body has been through a lot, I asked my doctor for his opinion. He came up with 150. I honestly don't know how much I weigh now because I haven't weighed myself in over a year. I no longer "track" my weight and I am better off for it. My body has its own schedule and I'm just along for the ride.

What I hear is... I am trying so hard. That's the best any of us can do. Don't be so critical of yourself. Be happy about your all of victories (little and big) and don't dwell on the other stuff. You will have good days and not so good days. Make the most of them all!😀

Do you have any known thyroid disease? I have Hashimoto's thyroiditis, and I noticed that I had similar symptoms (that got worse) post-gastric bypass. Perhaps there is no correlation, but it's one possibility.

Let common sense be your guide. Which procedure did you have? Are you aware of which forms of vitamins and minerals to take and which are most readily absorbed?

Wow, seeing that you're from Queensland, triggered a memory of one my first penpals some 40 or so years ago. I can still remember her name (Christine Crump) and where she lived (Townsville).

Tell these cogs what they want to hear so you can move things along. Believe me, they are pathetic nobodies in the big picture. I hate that these ego-starved "professionals" are dragging you down, and making you feel unsure of yourself. Trust your own better judgment and remind yourself that you know you and they don't! Get a good raincoat and let everything they say roll off of you. Feed yourself a daily dose of positive affirmations (no matter how corny) to counteract their barbs. You sound like a sensible and centered person. Don't let others make you feel less about yourself or your goals. And keep coming here. Vent, vent, vent.

I am also currently boobless. And to think my breasts used to be overflowing with breastmilk, so much so that I donated a lot of my milk to a milk bank at a local children's hospital.