kjillb

I made the ricotta bake. It was hands down the best thing I’ve eaten in weeks. Melty cheese, bubbly cheese, so. much. cheese. I portioned out my 2 ounces, happily ate it, and thought “a little more won’t hurt.” I ate maybe another 1.5 ounces. That 1.5 ounces is still sitting in my throat 30 minutes later. I am miserable. I can’t decide if I should try and make myself sick or just sit quietly and suffer.
I know I shouldn’t be beating myself up, but I’m screaming at myself inside. Why did I do this? I knew exactly what was going to happen, but it didn’t deter me. I know it’s only been a few weeks since my surgery and my mentality won’t change overnight, but it’s scary to see how self-destructive I am.
Tell me I’m not the only one who’s gone through this? I need a little pep talk.

I made the ricotta bake. It was hands down the best thing I’ve eaten in weeks. Melty cheese, bubbly cheese, so. much. cheese. I portioned out my 2 ounces, happily ate it, and thought “a little more won’t hurt.” I ate maybe another 1.5 ounces. That 1.5 ounces is still sitting in my throat 30 minutes later. I am miserable. I can’t decide if I should try and make myself sick or just sit quietly and suffer.
I know I shouldn’t be beating myself up, but I’m screaming at myself inside. Why did I do this? I knew exactly what was going to happen, but it didn’t deter me. I know it’s only been a few weeks since my surgery and my mentality won’t change overnight, but it’s scary to see how self-destructive I am.
Tell me I’m not the only one who’s gone through this? I need a little pep talk.

Yes I get this.
But honestly the question is why if you are suffering from morbid obesity to the point that you need surgical intervention, would you put a drug in your body whose side effects for increasing appetites are WELL documented? I think people lie to themselves all the time! I can personally rationalize the CRAP outta anything I want--especially if it's something I'm addicted to!
Hell, I love oxycodone and live with a 5-6 pain level daily. But. It does NOTHING to help me lose weight. Why on earth would I take it daily? Just to reduce my pain level by 2pts and I feel ever so mellow after taking it? f**k no. I went through too much not to kick that **** to the curb and optimize the time I have in my honeymoon period!!!!

I made the ricotta bake. It was hands down the best thing I’ve eaten in weeks. Melty cheese, bubbly cheese, so. much. cheese. I portioned out my 2 ounces, happily ate it, and thought “a little more won’t hurt.” I ate maybe another 1.5 ounces. That 1.5 ounces is still sitting in my throat 30 minutes later. I am miserable. I can’t decide if I should try and make myself sick or just sit quietly and suffer.
I know I shouldn’t be beating myself up, but I’m screaming at myself inside. Why did I do this? I knew exactly what was going to happen, but it didn’t deter me. I know it’s only been a few weeks since my surgery and my mentality won’t change overnight, but it’s scary to see how self-destructive I am.
Tell me I’m not the only one who’s gone through this? I need a little pep talk.

Well, @FluffyChix I am in New Zealand, and it seems more common here to have practically no food plan. They are much more relaxed here - but I suspect a quirk of NZ law might be a GREAT reason for this.
Here it is, my US buddies. We have full, universal tax-paid no-fault accident insurance - so if something goes wrong (with anything - surgery, a ladder, a car crash) every single NZer gets full medical care free on the state and (more importantly) in return no-one can sue anyone. We have no courts full of people suing each other. None.
So maybe our Doctors ar a little less nervous? Anyway- my food plan was this.
1. Start with mush until you can eat harder foods, then progress as you are able. Don’t drink when you eat, for now. I was on puréed chicken and Beans before I left hospital.
2. Start with bites, then 1/4 cup, then 1/2 cup. Your max will be 1 cup but you might not get there.
3. Strictly 3 meals a day, no snacking. Protein first helps some people so feel free to give that a go, but don’t panic about 60g every single day because your liver will make you protein.
That is it. My meal plan.
My surgeon has a longitudinal study of 1700 patients going back, some nearly 20 years. The average calorie intake after 5 years is 900-1000. And he has a huge no-regain success rate too (but he does the no-stretch, double walled stomach with the silicone ring embedded - Fobi Pouch).

Hi everyone!
I wanted to take a time out here and share about my weight loss journey, as I close in on my goal weight it's a good time to reflect, look at what worked and what isn't work and set myself to accomplish what I am out to accomplish.
I had gastric sleeve in Mexico on 5/26, and started a 10 day liquid diet before. I was self-pay, my insurance doesn't cover bariatric surgery. I coordinated with my PCP (who wasn't thrilled, but once she got I was going to do it, we did all the preliminary lab work in advance so there would be no surprises.) The surgery was straightforward and seamless and besides not liking the hotels included in the package (I went to Cancun), everything else was great (the surgeon, nurses and other staff).
I had prepared myself for what there was to deal with and took a week off work afterwards which was more than enough time.
Before my liquid diet I weighed 335 which was my highest ever weight. I am 50 and 5'8", so clocked in with a BMI over 50. I had not developed hypertension or sleep apnea, but my A1C was 7.0 and had just started metformin.
I hadn't dieted in years - while in the past I found it pretty easy to lose weight, at some point I would fail and more weight would come on so I had concluded that I would stop dieting and just deal with being fat for the rest of my life.
I started to consider WLS about 3 years ago, but I was so scared to confront this issue again, I just avoided doing any planning, acting or organizing to move this forward. It was last year (feb 2017) that my A1C was up to 7 and that's when I decided to act. I had known that VSG patients were almost immediately cured of diabetes that's when I started to act.
After surgery, I dropped weight quickly and easily and still am. Not including the 1st month (a huge loss), I have averaged 2.5 lbs per week. There are a couple of things that made a difference for me.
1. Keeping the Protein first rule and learning which foods are sliders and which foods are triggers.
2. After I was down to 290 I started an exercise regimen. I used to play sports and work out and knew that I could build muscle quickly and easily which would support my weight loss. I did HIT and strength training and am now doing low impact conditioning and strength training (injured my knee last month).
3. I weigh and tweak, weigh and tweak, weigh and tweak. Right now I am eating a high fat, moderate protein, low carb diet. I average about 1000 cals/day. Every 4-6 days I do a major calorie/carb spike. I am now experimenting with single day fasts. However, high fat/moderate protein seems to be the best combination. I do the carb spike if I go 4 days without losing weight. I made all this up, it's strictly a function of weighing and tweaking. I don't know if there's any science (except the studies that validate that the most successful weight loss people are the ones who stick with it and find what works for them.) Until I am in maintenance I will continue to weigh and tweak and if any approaches stop working, I will stop using them.
4. Paying attention to building lean muscle - improvements in strength, flexibility and endurance were as important as drops on the scale. I hired a trainer who runs a small boutique fitness gym 2 doors from me - I selected it because I figured I couldn't have any excuse not to go given I didn't have to walk far, take the subway or deal with transit. I got lucky - he is amazing, unbelievably educated and started training me right where I was and its unbelievable the changes in 4 months of work. He said he couldn't promise weight loss - that was up to me - but he could promise strength, endurance, balance and flexibility - all of which he delivered.
5. I am planning for maintenance - I am a very target-oriented person. Given me a target, a goal or an outcome and once I set my sights on it I am pretty unf****kable with it. I am looking at different goals and outcomes to create for myself.
6. I am surprised at how necessary exercise has become for me. Even when I played sports, I hated all the training that came with it - I just wanted to play and compete. To some extent, I think I am competing with myself, but this is a journey and I am excited about what my body can become and accomplish.
For the first time in almost 30 years I am under 200 lbs. I have lost 85% of my excess body weight in 10 months. I am grateful for surgery, genetics, and also the people on this board - whom I have learned a lot from.
What is next?
I am still experimenting and am educating myself on fasting. I am doing weekly 1 day fasts just to get in the world of what that's like and will plan for a 3-5 day fast at some point in the future.
If I get my knee straightened out I would like to hike up a mountain. This summer I would like to sail and bike the west side of NY along the Hudson River. I would like to lose these last 30 or so lbs my birthday in June (which is unlikely, but I like targets!)
Thank you for these boards, your participation and every journey here, it has made a difference.