Frustr8

Bio-oil, used to use Vitamin E capsules on previous scars but didn't like the Tacky- post- usage sensation. 😛

And my latest Blood Draw, Ferritin is still on the low side but a little better, 323mg of Ferrocite, something should be happening. But my Newbie deficiency- Vitamin A- I have to up my ingestion of foods that contain that like pumpkin, collard greens- ❤them but nobody else in family does- & a 1000 mg pill daily. And in 2,months another Blood Draw to see if THAT helped any. And perhaps THAT helps account for my Dry 👀 among other things; Who Would Have Guessed?

My Goal 175 pounds and a Size 15 Junior My Highest Weight 365+ never worked out the BMI for That- somewhere between 50 and 60? Today- First Surgiversity,and 182.3 and a 28.8 BMI Squat choice Easy and Please God,that I WILL Not Fall Backwards! And something I find Hard to believe is that This Weight Loss I have had is really and truly MINE; I still worry that Someone or Something will take it away- that Fat Frustr8 will return- that All This is only a Dream and can be abruptly wrenched away.😪😢😪

Amen and Amen from a FFNF, Formerly Fat and Now Fantastic sister! May your Future Shine as Bright As Mine Has Become!👍😝🌈

Hiya Ellf! Today is My FIRST SURGIVERSITY,AND I am now half the weight I started this Last Segment of Bariatric Life ( I fought for over 3 years to receive IT) at 365+ and I am ( Drum Roll Please) 182.3. And lest that sounds impossible, I DID IT ALL at 72 years with the Natural BMR of a Seasick Sea 🐌, took Work, took Stubborness and , no matter what the People I encountered tried to Say, I Did IT RIGHT and like the song Paul Anna wrote and Frank Sinatra made His Own---' I DID IT MY WAY! And I am remodeled, realigned and renovated! I think I am now smaller than my High Graduation 56 years ago this Past May- and It Does Feel Fine! People seem to recognize me by my voice because my Exterior is NOT THE SAME! I finally radiate what I always have been inside- One Heck of A Woman, and pretty doggone Good to Know. And the Rest of My Life has Become The Best of My Life and I Do Wish It for All reading This! 😛❤ from Your Frustr8

Sending Prayers🙏Your Way- I Believe in YOU so now YOU believe in TOU YOU!❤

And Sheribear68, just come to MY COUNTY, Knox County Ohio, We have so Many MO, even toddlers and Children, and I Also WISH I COULD EVANGELIZE them ALL, although as Green Tealael alluded Many of Them WOULD NOT ACCEPT the MESSAGE. Part of the Reason I really deserve my Pen Name for I can Cry in Frustration for Them All, many will Die Too Soon, Those who STILL Live will have a Much Sadder Existence- I KNOW Because for MANY YEARS I Too Was THERE and it is a Living Purgatory and I wish Each of THEM could find THEIR WAY to Freedom as I DID. I spent so Much Time, and at Half the Size I once was I have gone from MO to Overweight classification and I don't know if I could even make it down to a "Normal" BMI, at MY HEIGHT that would be 140 pounds, I am proud and grateful to be (Drum Roll Please!) 182.3 pounds this day, My First Surgiversity, haven't made it down to my GOAL- 175- but I CAN SEE IT SHINING FOR ME JUST AHEAD- and Please GOD,may it STILL Happen😛👣😛🌈

Well my friends TODAY IS MY FIRST SURGIVERSITY- and I may be waxing a bit philosophical. Goes with the TERRITORY- I'm older than Dirt, gives you a lot to reason with when You've attained 73 years 8 months and 10 days upon this Earth. What advice would I give the Newbies and the Stiil- Strugglers as this point? Don't obsess about YOUR YESTERDAYS- the Past has passed- Don't Cry for What you think You've Lost- Look forward to Your New Tomorrows. Life now has Many Happy Moments in YOUR Future. It has been a year of Some sorrows but Many Many Blessings. I WILL Never REGRET having Surgery- I did not Heal as I believed I WOULD- my pathway has had bumps, some bruised me, thought a few times I would fall off the Edge into Quicksand, twists, turns, A few times I thought I had gotten lost, Many Things changed for me, but more than CHANGE I finally found MYSELF- learned I was Still Strong enough. You Know we come into life a Blank Canvas, each of the portraits painted are unique. I have scars, been bumped and bruised but what I have encountered, I have survived, I have surmounted, And Each mar, each stretch- mark, each scar, and I have had some emotional Keloids, Those are my BATTLE RIBBONS, they show I have truly Lived and are STILL LIVING ! Like the line from the Big Lebowski- I ABIDE. And one of the Boasts, Brag and Acknowledgment? I AM NOW LESS than HALF the Person I was at my Highest Weight, I have gone from 365+ to Just Over 180, and although I HAVE LIVED IT, it still amazes ME, I Still have a Few Items Left from Back Then- tried them on and they LITERALLY FELL OFF! I am a loose 18- tighter 16 in SIZE- and although my Dr Needleman , my Bariatric Surgeon, promised I Could and Would Lose Weight- I didn't really believe It Could Happen. I had so Many People promise Me Things that never really Happened, after you cry and cry, You find yourself Still Numb- Not even Flinching Any more. I was Never Suicidal because I had No Courage Left to Actually Do The Deal, And My Fears THAT is a SAD STATE OF AFFAIRS. But Now having been a Subseviant Lump, because I was Told That was was Expected of Me- I was taught to Please my Parents, My late Husband, even the 3 children GOD had granted Me. Did anyone bother pleasing ME? NOPE for NOBODY thought I was Worthy, just behave & cause No Waves. Took Me YEARS. and More YEARS to realize Frustr8 was and is a Strong Enough, Worthy Enough and Deserving Enough to continue Living. I no longer believe I am An Extension of Somebody Else, I Am and From Now On will be Strong, Reliant instead of merely Reliable, My Own WOMAN and my Bariatric Surgery helped me to Affirmation of This Fact. So Bradley J Needlman,of The OHIO STATE UNIVERSITY HOSPITAL- WEXNER MEDICAL CENTER- Thank You for MY Wonder Wednesday- MY Day of DAYS & I HOPE TODAY you are giving a New Group their Terrific Thursday- and Next Year They Too look Back with Joy at ALL THAT HAPPENED FOR THEM. And May BLESSINGS Be Theirs. So Celebrate wherever You May be and Face YOUR Tomorrows with Conviction and Strength for You Are Strong, Brave, Worthy , and if You Fear there may Be Trials and Rainy Days- DON'T! Everything you're going through TODAY does Bring A Bright and Sunny Future- AND IT IS WORTH IT ALL! MUCH 💘 LOVE. your FRUSTR8!!!!!

And mine they believe is due to all the endoscopies I have had done- 14 at last count- vocal cords got a little trauma from all that tubing going through repeatedly. The Blessing: along with all the other portions of ME that got smaller, I now have an "indoor" voice , no more Ms Big Mouth for ME.

Yeah April, isn't the selection fantabulous when you leave plus sizes behind! I have reverted to Junior sizes, Okay I admit, it's the Upper side of the size range, but I AM STILL LOSING AFTER ALL!

Just had Ambulatory Surgery to remove a cyst, not feeling too bad, getting over the General they gave ME. My new NSV, I no longer need the "OMG--- Just How Big ARE YOU," size, I got a "Normal" and had enough room it met in the back, so no more "Moon over Miami" for ME!

Now my friends, now you all know. what engenders the sarcastic motto: "AETNA- I wish I had never met ya! " I can only hope there is Special area in Hades for health insurance executives to be placed in . Then when they start screaming for mercy ,we can say " Gee, I'm sorry , but YOU DON'T QUALIFY, and we don't have the time to examine your problem on a case- by- case formula or subject you to,peer review." Yeah, never would happen but I can dream, can't I ?

It's ever so nice to be able to write. "1" in the front part of your weight, isn't it? For me, it gave renewed commitment to keep on toward Goal, it no longer seemed so hopeless an undertaking.😝👣😝

Well I'm showing up here to relate my take. it's incisional but a little different. I just had a volar ganglion cyst REMOVED, to educate you a little it was on the back of my Left wrist a little ways from the thumb. ABOUT AS BIG AS A QUARTER. Now they are always non- cancerous, many people just leave them alone, some have them REMOVED from appearance. Mine sat right over top of a nerve and the radial artery, my thumb and 1st finger would go Numb in between sessions of pain. So Cyster J Cyst had to go! It says prominately on my chart and paperwork- No Hibiclez- No chlorhexadine- because I am very allergic to them. Found out when I had my 2nd knee replacement and my leg blistered and about lost skin peeling off. Don't know what my orthopaedic surgeon painted my arm with this time, thought maybe betadine, never a problem with THAT. Well within a day my arm started o I blistering and peeling skin, had to at d it , wash it off with gentle soap and water, then when dry put on cortisone cream and re-h it. Its now 4 days past, yesterday I had to do it again, this time the whole lower arm, even where my incision was. He doesn't plan to remove the stitches until September 11, so I was at a loss. Finally remembered I had some dressing change kits from when I had my PICC line in for malnutrition/ giving my gastrointestinal ulcers a chance to heal. Never washed the surgical wound itself, didn't want contamination there, but put on Tegaderm and then re-wrapped it with all new gauze. Today the bumpy rash is going away, Goody Goody Gumdrops, feel like I dodged the bullet there but if any of you have similar symptoms with your tummy wounds ,at least let your doctor know, go to the ER, nobody wants to suffer with a rash like MINE. And yes, when I see him on the 11th I SHALL FIND OUT what was used, it needs to go on my chart ---NEVER AGAIN! In just a few months I am scheduled to have my Left Rotator cuff repaired and THIS WILL NOT happen AGAIN!✊! There have got to be other alternatives to what was used.👍

Darned if you DO, darned if you DON'T- every adolescent should come with a barometer in the middle of their forehead so YOU know how to address THEM!

Well Fluffy I do agree because I still fight this battle. Instead of the. Old Classic "What a Difference A Day Makes", I hereby n9minate for the Fecal HitParade---" What a Difference a Poop Makes". I worked for eons in Long Term Health Care, ridiculed my clients ( behind their backs of course) about their obsession. Well Dayum, they KNEW what they were talking about, even the gentleman who stood up in the middle of the Dining Room to announce " I TOOK A DUMP TODAY!", one of my funniest moments because I was one table away helping someone else with their meal.

Well how my BD manifests itself for me. Since my still ongoing Weight loss, I have be3n fearful that I look like I'm on the verge of Anorexia or "Failure to Thrive" , scrawny neck, you now can see my collar bones and visualize my top 3 ribs in my chest cavity, hardly any boobs, down from 46DD to a 40/42B, depending on Bra price point. WAIST has diminished , pot belly is now a small warm- up skillet, Baby "no longer has back", now down to 2 small handfuls, if I could get a guy to grab them. Now the flesh on lower abdomen and thighs, especially inner portions, I liken to a balloon that was blown up and then air let out, an empty blobby stretched appearance, but the legs are beaten and trimmed enough I can wear leggings without somebody thinking I was poured into them and didn't know when to stop. And the sizing , ooh I GLORY at that, I'm back into Juniors where I truly belong, Okay still at the Upper End, 17 and 19 , but still a NSV or close to it, my BMI this AM is 29.2. All sounds pretty fine ? Well I am apprehensive that I look sickly and could possibly DIE! No Less than my Ortho, who called me by my Legal First Name, no MaMa did NOT christen ME Frustr8, I picked IT up along the way. Anyway Dr Doolittle, who is Sport Medicine along with Orthopaedics, so should be able to adequately assess body types. He said " Darlin'( from him I accept the endearment , most other guys I would "Jack-Slap" instead) You are merely starting to look NORMAL!" How would I Know That Already? I have never been NORMAL or AVERAGE in my whole existance! So although much of my Veiwing Public feels I look Just Fine, I fear I Am still the obese unbalanced ugly ME I used to Be, and it is difficult for my Rational Mind to overcome my Bruised Battered Emotional Foundation. I was told by Kith and Kin I was Ugly, Disgusting , barely worthy of life and nobody much wanted me Near Them. Case in Point--- I got a BonoFide Wolf Whistle the Other Day, I looked around because I thought it was a compliment given to someone Else. SAD, ISN'T IT?

And BOTH of those things YOU DO NOT WANT or DESIRE!

And it's 1*8*8 not 2*8*8, been in Onederland such a Small Time even I can't believe it's TRUE!

Well I am 288 ( I think) at a week short of 1 year and a Joyful Size 17/18 and diminishing Every Day. I started at 365+ so at 5ft8in I'm starting to look like a Firecracker instead of a Full keg of Dynamite! And my PCP, yep same dude that danced around singing " You're Obese and you're GONN DIE!" now has started a Slender-Shaming Tirade. Thinks I've lost TOO MUCH and TOO FAST,told me I could stop ALREADY. Am I Gonna? Nope no Way, not when I can SEE my goal of 175 shining ahead for ME! But some people are so Contrary they' d argue with a tack about not being Sharp enough. There is an River in the Canadian Maritimes so affected by the tides it flows backwards. Wonder if they would like to go live there?👈😛👉

Way to Go, @ cubyblue6, hope things went Sweet, Smooth and Sleek and YOU'RE NOW LIVING the👣 Recovery Life! Just remember, Every Day in Every Way it gets Better and Better🌈😛

I like I like👍😛

And you didn't ask but my Current Favorite Protein bar is Pure Protein Lemon Bar, one of the few I can much on without my dentures, usually split it in two because it fills me pretty well.

Michael S 👍 and may everything Go Well Diet-wise!

Maybe this is why Dartmouth has trouble in the Ivy League, I like all Those Things but not exclusively. Well, we all hate our Pre-Diets but do remember THIS TOO WILL PASS, only I was unlucky enough to Bog down in Puree-Land forever and ever but that is a Whole Another Tale, isn't it?