JConforti

4 minutes ago, Slightly Less Fatty Matty said:

Another problem with counting pills... sometimes we guys are overly “optimistic.” viagra takes some time to kick in so if we anticipate wrongly (who us?!) it can go to waste. As far as not telling her I know from experience that some women assume we can turn it on and off at will and assume if there is an issue with this imaginary on/off switch that there is a problem with attraction, and no matter what you say they grill you about it endlessly, so you learn it’s best to just not even bring the subject up at all, which in the case of ED medicine means not telling them about it at all.

X2

It could be any number of, or combination of things. From physical to emotional/mental.

If he still wakes with an erection most mornings then its probably not a physical thing.

I still do wake with a BEMHO but I have a problem maintaining an erection during sex so the pill gets the job done. He may be having a similar issue, his drive may be falling off.. could be many things.

My thoughts are like yours.... if they match up... let it be. I’m going to talk to her Tomorrow. I was thinking about the performance aspect too. Then I thought that if he learns that she is monitoring that...he might feel like the trust is gone.
might I ask.... what are the side effects you are talking about?

My first impression is, as long as the amount of missing pills matches the sexual encounters, she should keep it to herself and be glad he is addressing an issue that effects them both. Vitality is an important thing to men feeling like a man. He may see it as a blow to his ego.

I'm 54 and I use it. I don't go telling everyone about it, although my wife knows. Keep in mind that it works, but its not all that pleasant. There are unpleasant side affects that are uncomfortable. Also remember, men feel the performance pressure.

Just my .02 but what do I know.

I wish I had more Sage advice for you but all I can offer is to second what others have said and to point out;

Obesity is a disease that inevitably leads to many other diseases.

If you had a deceased heart, would you not have surgery to repair and cure?

If you, god forbid, cancer and surgery could remove and cure it, would you not move forward?

I think it is ridiculous irresponsible for someone to advocate against medical treatment for a disease.

I'm not sure of your co-morbidities but if she is a nurse, she must know the dangers of type II diabetes. Does she know the ADA now recognizes WLS as a treatment for diabetes? Also, take a look at this book

Type 2 Diabetes: New Doorways to Health: Surprising Breakthroughs from an Expert Surgeon

JC - my .02

I kept one pair of pants, a belt, and one shirt as a reminder of where I'll never be again.

I donated to goodwill and also shopped there for a year, many of the shirts I got at goodwill were donated again a few weeks after I got them as they got too big. At $5-6 a shirt it only made sense. It was sort of like renting

I was very quiet about it before my surgery, and directly after but when the results became obvious I would tell ppl " Diet and exercise. If, as JohnnyCakes said, they pressed. I would have that conversation.

Now 3 years out I tell ppl "I had my stomach removed" and if they really want to know I have the conversation with them.

I felt the same way until I realized I have the same amount but now on much less acreage.

There are a couple particular problems.
If using a mobile device and looking at new posts, it will not show the entire threaded view to see what specific group its in. I posted in the girls room for benign topics because of this, because I am not in the habit of scrolling riles at the topic heading for every single topic.
Secondly, the forum hoster surely can develop a way that locks out a particular group based on your gender profile.

12 hours ago, Frustr8 said:

@jconforti, I was looking for a location to find you. Your point on "Am I the only one" is well-taken and well-stated. May I share what,happened to me once? Often if I feel I have an insight, I do post. Thought that was fine until one day I answered a query,only to be put down because I was pre-surgical, apparently this person felt only post-surgical persons should be permitted ustto answer. My response had been gauged on life experiences which I had felt had equal validity. Didn't post for awhile, my "newbie" feelings were wounded, and until she went,inactive I never posted again where she was at. Just wanted to share this with you, and until I upgraded to Beta app, my "trendings" never told what forum things originated from so once or twice I did post way back in the GuysRoom by accident, but not anymore. I respect the boundaries now.

8

@Frustr8 - I don't want to hijack this thread or take away from @Glen Dean's accomplishments.

No one should be put down for offering insight or advice and I'm sorry that happened to you. I hope it does not deter you from offering support in the future.

I would also like to thank you for trying to respect the boundaries. However, and with respect, I can't help myself from mentioning that you are making this statement from inside the boundaries you are trying to respect. This is still the Guys room.

Just my .02,

JC

I'd guess that your entire dating landscape will change. By that I mean you are going to change, your confidence will change, your tolerance for BS with change, you will find a voice you didn't know you had.

In other words, you may want to begin to ask yourself, not who will like me, but who will deserve me.

Just my .02

@Matt Z

Thank you. My point exactly. I don't expect anything to change, but It feels good to vent.

Fair point well made. However, I think it's more about respecting boundaries. I respect theirs. I don't care who actually reads my posts, but when I post in the guys room it's because I'm looking for the Male perspective or comradeory. Otherwise I'd post it in the appropriate general forum.

Thanks for your comments and opinion.

Sent from my SM-N950U using BariatricPal mobile app

2 minutes ago, Stacey-July 2018 said:

It's a really great idea to keep track of measurements. I hadn't thought of that. There is more than just the scale. Thanks for the idea and I think I am going to borrow your template. Thanks!

you are more than welcome

Am I the only one that gets annoyed by the number of women that post in the Guys' Room?

Please don't get me wrong, I have the utmost respect for women and consider them peers and equals.

I guess the rub is that women dominate, for obvious reasons (80/20), the general forum and I personally don't and rarely see men post in the Gals' room. It feels like an invasion of the one place that should be The Guys' Room. And, I've read the excuses about how they don't know there in here. To me, they are just that, excuses. I can read a URL just like everyone else.

Hope this doesn't start a $hit storm, just want some perspective. Oh and to be clear, I want it from the Men.

Matt Z is so right. and it will happen several more times. What helped me was along with weighing myself, I would measure. Do this once or twice a month. I can almost guaranty you that when the scale temporarily stops moving, your measurements are moving. Attached is what I use to track. Feel free to clear the data and use it yourself.

My Measurements.xlsx

These are also an option later on. Also, a better choice than drinking your Protein. At least in my opinion.

https://www.amazon.com/Pure-Protein-High-Variety-1-76-Ounce/dp/B01126O3OY/ref=sr_1_1_sspa?ie=UTF8&qid=1533314807&sr=8-1-spons&keywords=pure%2Bprotein&th=1

Here are two good resources

https://www.bariatricfoodie.com/recipe-index/

https://www.amazon.com/dp/1623157730/?ref=exp_influencer-0fd610d1_lv_dp_vv_d

6 minutes ago, J San said:

@JConforti Thanks for posting and BIG CONGRATS to you sir. My starting weight is quite a bit more than yours but height and goal weight are pretty spot on. I love seeing posts like this. Such an inspiration and does wonders for my motivation. Almost a year apart from our surgeries as well. Just great to see.

Congratulations to you and welcome to the bench. Thank you for your kind words. If you should ever want or need to talk - Get in touch. It is very gratifying to me when my success is motivation or in some way helps others.

Remember to always focus on how far you've come.

My top 12 (In no particular order)

1. Diabetes in complete remission
2. Sitting in booths
3. Not worrying if I will fit if I need to use a public restroom
4. Boundless energy
5. Fitting in a chair with armrest - getting out of it without it being stuck to my a$$
6. Not avoiding my photo being taken
7. Everything I do is easier
8. No pain (Knee, feet, back ....)
9. Going from a 48" wait to 34"
10. Having to remove 4 links from my watch band
11. This conversation - Me: "Honey, did you pick me up anything while you were at the clothing store?" Wife: "NO. I'm afraid to buy you clothes because they will be too big by the time I get them home!"
12. This picture VVVVV

Fantastic!

July 24th was my one-year surgiversary. What a fantastic journey so far!

July 24th was my one-year surgiversary . What a fantastic journey so far!

I'm a year out and still rarely get physically hungry. I do, sometimes, struggle with head hunger at night while watching TV. I battle it by doing hobbies like tinkering and painting. As long as I'm focused on something I am never hungry.

Yes. You should hold off as long as you can or pick up an inexpensive pair. I've replaced everything I wear (except my socks) 4 times. My shoe size was 9 wide and now I wear a reg. 9.5 Others will tell you that you size will change too. Good luck and congratulations.