achelln

I have always been fat, hitting 275 in highschool. In college I lost a lot of weight. Simple calorie counting. I yoyoed a little but managed to be between 220 and 250. Especially as I started Drinking. It was going great until I started taking Phentermine. Which I wish I was exaggerating when I say I am lucky to have survived what that doctor did to me. Since college I have gotten back on track. It took many years to recover emotionally to the effects of the different medications also I have been alcohol free for 2 years. Cig free for 4. Managed with the help of a Pavlok bracelet to ditch sugar. (hypoglycemic, I crave that stuff bad) A year ago I was in California, doing crossfit, and paleo. got back down to 240ish. Walking 8 miles with my dog in the summer on weekends.. Moved back home with the folks away from that healthy lifestyle. Took a job at an abusive startup, quit and been doing freelancing.. and a year later now I am at 275 again. At the least I can deadlift 350 lbs, unlike me in highschool, but I am at the same 40 in waist line. I went from doing workouts like FRAN to now having a hard time with a mild hike. Sad. I even had a chart. I never missed a week, and on average I did 3.4 sessions per week over 8 months. About 115 sessions in a chain. I was looking at POSE but that is not in the US. (6 years and counting... oh FDA). The balloon in the stomach looks interesting, but I don't need a short term solution. The rest looks scary as ****. I have no interest in having half my stomach cut out. I just need help eating less. I am also not interested in anything that would cut my caloric intake to under 1400 a day. I believe doing so will only irreversibly damage your metabolism. Not to mention kill me in the gym. I guess my only option is to get the balloon as a jump start and stop making escuses to why I cannot be what I was just 18 months ago.