biginjapan

losing everything .. so lost now... job gone ... saved retirement gone,.... surgery cancelled ... not much now ... cant pay bills or see a way to catch up ... just want to fall asleep and never wake up ... what will become of us

I first started here back in 2016 and let me tell you, although there were a ton of supportive people (especially veterans who were 3-5 years out and had years of experience to draw from, which I find really lacking now), there were also a lot of flame wars and ganging up on people. Whole threads would get shut down, people got banned, and a lot of people left en masse to try out other forums (but I still like this one the best). So the current group of active people here are great, no real shaming for going off-plan, or hurt snowflakes who couldn't take constructive criticism/help for what it was. At least, I haven't seen that since I've been back. It's almost like this is a new place. The little bit of tension that does exist is a pale shadow of what was here before!
As for soda (or any carbonated drink), I think in the end it's up to each person to decide if it's worth it for them. I used to be addicted to Diet Coke/Coke Zero, drank at least a litre a day, until one day it just made my gastro-intestinal issues so bad I decided to stop cold turkey (this was years before my sleeve surgery). I never went back. I would occasionally have a Sprite or ginger ale but I wasn't addicted to those so it never got me back to drinking Coke. After my sleeve surgery, about 6 months out, I was with some colleagues at a restaurant and my only choice of drinks (besides Water and alcohol) was soda, so I tried a very small ginger ale. I was in so much pain after a couple of sips, not only could I not finish the drink, I couldn't finish the meal. The few other times I've tried anything carbonated over the years has been the same - my stomach just can't handle it. The other thing I would worry about when re-introducing it (or any other "problematic" food/drink) is that it can be an enabler to other foods we shouldn't be eating. While I drank Diet Coke on it's own, I also liked it with pizza, or Doritos, or chips, or pretzels, or... you get the idea. I've learned from my failure with my sleeve that that's what I have to be the most concerned about - not that having something once in a while will throw me off track, but that it will encourage me to try other off-limit foods once in a while, until it becomes a regular habit once again.

To each their own. My surgeons office told all of us that after a year we could go back to drinking soda if we want, but it would stretch our new stomach over time. And gaining weight back is a distinct possibility if that happens. Soda was actually the easiest thing for me to give up since when I was diagnosed with EOS that was one of the things that raised my choking issues so I stopped drinking it for two years. Then had only been drinking it again for a few months when I started the weight loss process and I gave it up with no issue. But, not everyone is me and I realize that. If soda makes you happy then good for you. However, keep this in mind. I work with tons of people who have had weight loss surgery and the ones who've put back on weight all have one thing in common.... they drink soda.

Did you have a question about sodas or just needed to get this off your chest?? I think there’s a rant and rave section for that.
Ive seen other Bariatric forums where people gang up on others. I have not seen that happen at all in this site. I’ve only been provided with amazing support here. I’m 16 days post-op and will not be trying carbonation of any kind as my surgeon has warned me it is not good for my new tummy. I wish you best of luck on your journey.

You are still recovering from surgery so your weight will likely fluctuate for a few weeks (although overall should be going down). I think as we start using up the glucose in our fat cells it can cause some Fluid retention which causes our weight to go up temporarily. Don't weigh yourself everyday - it's the fastest way to de-motivate yourself if you don't see any movement, or only upwards movement. I "gained" five pounds after surgery but have been slowly losing since then. It's best to pick one day a week for an "official" weigh in (for me it's Monday morning) - don't worry what's happening the other days (easier said than done!).
Stick to your post-op diet, walk as much as you can, and distract yourself by doing other things. Make a list of non-scale victories (NSV) that you can track or look forward to, like fitting into smaller clothes, being able to sit on a bus/subway seat with enough room for another person to sit beside you (and not touch them!), seeing your collarbones again, being able to fit into smaller/former shoe sizes since your feet may have been too big/swollen from years of being overweight (this was a big one for me), being able to wear heels again without being in pain, not needing a seatbelt extender when flying, etc, etc. You can also make a list of "rewards" or future plans to look forward to. Like, when you lose your first 10 or 20 pounds. 50 pounds. 100 pounds. Making it to "onederland" (under 200 pounds). For example, for me, once I hit goal weight (or near it), I'd really like to do a physical challenge that I really couldn't do before because of my weight (and therefore my knee and back problems). So climbing Kilimanjaro and walking the Camino de Santiago in Spain are two bucket list items that I would like to do once I lose the weight (and save the money) to do so. Having a really great makeover (hair, makeup, clothes, everything) is something else I'd like to do.
Another thing to remember is that (I think, for all of us), we didn't gain weight every single day as we were overeating or making poor food choices throughout our lives, it was a gradual, but steady, increase over time. Same with losing weight. It's not going to happen every day in a steady decline. Some days (or weeks! It will happen eventually) the weight may not move at all, or may go up a little. But stick to the plan, try not to fall off the wagon no matter how tempting, and the weight loss will be steady over time. Not every day, but it's happening.

No judgement here - just facts. Soda of any kind is implicated in fatty liver disease. Been there, done that. Not going back.

Your surgeon/nutritionist/center should have some sort of guidelines for you pre-op. Not every pre-op diet is liquid only. For me I was allowed to eat 800-1200 calories a day, having two Protein Shakes and one proper (lean) meal a day. The day before surgery I was allowed to have a carb-rich meal for dinner (I had a Pasta salad). My surgeon believes that the extra calories helps recovery go faster and based on my experience I'm totally on board! Even with my first surgery, I was allowed a similar pre-op diet with Clear Liquids only the 3 days before surgery. But on this board you'll find people who had to do 1-2 weeks liquids both pre- and post-op. It really depends on where you are getting your surgery. Whatever they suggest, follow it. If they aren't suggesting anything however, I'd be a little worried about that (and find out why).

I have 4 scales - a really old one from Weight Watchers that is good for measuring dry goods like Beans or lentils, although it also has a "plate" that is useful for just about anything. When I had my first surgery I got a bigger digital scale that I used daily, for everything. I then got a smaller digital scale (about the size of a passport) for use at work, so I could weigh things that I bought on the go. I love it so much as I can keep it in my bag, bring it travelling, etc. because it weighs so little and takes so little space. Oh, and I do have a spoon scale, similar to this, that is good for small amounts or liquidy/semi-solid things.

Please don't weigh yourself every day! It's not healthy. It's easy to get depressed and not see your own progress if you weigh yourself every day. Instead, do it once a week. Trust me, it's so much less stressful to do it this way!

I bought a digital scale off Walmart.com. it was like $10 and works great!

Oh no, sorry Casey, that does suck. Was really nice to have him to lean on to walk around, but I will say the nurses were awesome at my hospital so hoping you have the same at yours. I know you’ll do great! You’ve wanted this for a long time and worked hard for it, so I’ve got tons of positive vibes for ya girl! Keep us posted and ask any questions needed. The people here have been sooo helpful!

@Casey2020 no girl, no bra. You gonna be naked under that hospital gown. I went in my pj’s essentially with granny panties and a very comfortable sports bra. My surgery was scheduled for 10:30. I arrived at 8:30 and was clothed for about 30 minutes. Whatever you pack, pack comfortably. You’re going to be VERY bloated and full of the gas they pump into you for the surgery. Think Of what you would wear when you left work on Friday with no plans the weekend and you plan to lay on the couch and binge your favorite movies all weekend. They are going to have you up and walking ASAP, so make sure it’s easy to walk in.

@CammyC Im inpatient. They said i will be there 2 nights. Thanks for the good energy! This is an odd question but do they let you wear a bra in the surgery room. Im trying to figure out what to pack/wear.

@Casey2020 that does suck not having anyone there with you. So are you outpatient? I was outpatient. If so, you get to see your hubby very soon!
once you get int there and get going, it goes pretty quick. There will be all kinds of nurses in out doing different things getting you ready so you’re not going to be alone, but I understand wanting someone you know and love there with you. I wish you best of luck and congratulations on having your surgery!!! We’re gonna say it is happening to put that energy out there and so it is!

Thank you all for posting about your surgeries. You all have made me feel so prepared. My surgery is tomorrow and im hoping it doesnt get cancelled. The hospital called me twice already to make sure im on my clear liquid diet and this morning to make sure i dont have any corona virus symptoms. Everytime they called me i thought they were going to tell me its cancelled. Its making me really anxious. To top it all off they said i cant bring my husband with me and that it would be drop off/pickup only. Kinda sucks not having someone there for me.

I would definitely follow your surgeon’s instructions when you get them. The liquid diet is to shrink your liver which in turn aides in the success of your surgery and your safety. With that said, every surgeon has different requirements. Are you getting sleeve, bypass, RNY? I had sleeve on March 3rd. I think it would be a good idea to do some sort of diet or cleanse prior to surgery. Good luck on your journey!!

My date got moved from april 2 to March 26.
It's getting very real!!! No preop diet as of yet, since my b.m.i I sent that high. Would you suggest to do a liquid diet on my own ?

How are you feeling? I'm devastated and trying to get through this process and honestly I don't know how I do this, but I do it. I believe in God and I have to believe in myself to be a good grandmother to my son's child. I have to be, I appreciate BP because of people like you Mello 1, GreenTeal, Fluffy chick, Catwoman and this March group is amazing. So was my old January group of people, I'm thankful for the opportunity to transform my lifestyle and better health.

Do you want to spend the rest of your life getting bigger? Wait until you are 50 BMI (with probably more co-morbidities) to qualify? I think most people will say the earlier you do it, the better. You are young so don't wait for 20 years letting things pass you by that you couldn't do because of your weight. Get the surgery. Compared to all other weight loss methods, cutting out part of your stomach will "reset" your body - metabolism gets boosted, most people with diabetes no longer have it within weeks (sometimes days) of having the surgery, and for many women, the PCOS issue also gets resolved. There are a lot of medical journal articles about this, easily found on the internet - and I imagine, since you are at nursing school, you probably have even more resources to access that support these claims. Another benefit to your youth is that your skin is still pretty elastic and will probably bounce back a lot better than those of us who are older and are already dealing with sagging skin, not just because of the weight.

If you haven't already seen her videos, Clusie L has a ton of great videos explaining her process of getting through gastric sleeve surgery, food, plastic surgery, etc. I know she has multiple videos explaining why she got it and her struggles trying to get her family on board while she was still a teenager, but I can't find it at the moment. However, this video is a good substitute, geared towards teens, but maybe it will help you in making a decision.
Edit: my first surgery (sleeve) was done at 42, I just had a revision (45). I wish I had done this 10 years ago when my weight really started ballooning up beyond Obese (class 1) into 2, then 3, then beyond.

I'm 32, but have struggled with my weight my whole life and I honestly wish I'd done this ten years ago! I know I've only lost 99 pounds right now, but I already feel sooooo much better than before the weight loss, not only about myself, but physically as well. My BMI was 62 when I started and it's 46 right now (admittedly still high, but hey, I only had surgery 8 weeks ago lol). Just go over your options and go with your gut!

Damn, that is crazy. I hope you get good guidance from your Dr.

41..

The sooner you do it, the sooner you can live your life. My sister had rny when she was 22, an ex gf had a sleeve at 28. I just did the sleeve at 34. We are all doing fine.

I’m 40 years old and have struggled with my weight since I was 8 years old. I just had my sleeve surgery on March 3rd. I wish I would have done this years ago.

I have 4 scales - a really old one from Weight Watchers that is good for measuring dry goods like Beans or lentils, although it also has a "plate" that is useful for just about anything. When I had my first surgery I got a bigger digital scale that I used daily, for everything. I then got a smaller digital scale (about the size of a passport) for use at work, so I could weigh things that I bought on the go. I love it so much as I can keep it in my bag, bring it travelling, etc. because it weighs so little and takes so little space. Oh, and I do have a spoon scale, similar to this, that is good for small amounts or liquidy/semi-solid things.