Anna Nim

You are doing it for you. When feel good. Your world is better. I'm 2+ years out RNY. Good luck.
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Oh come on y'all, he is a father that doesn't want his daughter to have surgery. He is worried. That is a constant state of mind from the day your kids are born. It doesn't stop when they are adults. He is grasping at straws to try and get his point across and hasn't been as educated on the surgery as we have. It's his job to be concerned and care. It's his job to have an opinion. I think it's sweet. I think he sounds like a great father. No need to bash his intelligence or post hateful things. How could anyone read this and see anything other than a concerned dad. For someone who has lost her father, this melted my heart because it reminded me of how my dad would have been. I would NEVER have told him to "F$&@ off" as someone suggested.
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Malabsorbtion has a whole bunch of side effects in itself. Horrible gas, bloating, abdominal cramps and painting and foul BM. Not able to get anything except calories from food so you learn to eat great and you can't get the nutrition. Like superfoods such as kale and sweet potatoes. The Vitamins I take for the 4est of my life are fine but every once in awhile have to have Iron infusion and B12 and vit d extras because I get sick and blood work shows a huge lack in those. It's really hard to stay on top of and gets expensive. The dumping symptoms some times come out of the blue at the most inopportune times. That's another can of worms....
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Come on man, he is a 72 year old man who lives alone in fear and pain, we will all get there. He is over fretting, but he is my father-that is his job.
I have issue with his math and of course I am nervous. There ARE real risks.
As for my backbone, I can assure you, I most certainly have one. You have no idea.

Funny thing, is he is a retired mechanical engineer!

Come on man, he is a 72 year old man who lives alone in fear and pain, we will all get there. He is over fretting, but he is my father-that is his job.
I have issue with his math and of course I am nervous. There ARE real risks.
As for my backbone, I can assure you, I most certainly have one. You have no idea.

We're all "mean" for pointing out errors in her father's logic but her dad is just "nervous" for her? Someone who is just concerned for her wouldn't cherry pick pieces of an article out of context of the rest of the article, then inappropriately add them up in order to scare her into thinking that 86% of the people who have WLS have a serious complication. Someone who is just concerned for her, would do some research with an open mind and not call everything that goes against their negative opinion a "joke". Someone who is just concerned would attempt to meet with the medical team and ask questions about their concerns. Plus if you read her other posts/threads - there is a history there of negative and manipulative behavior on his part.
For the OP - I know based on your other threads that you were hoping/expecting your dad to pay for part of the surgery based on him initially offering too. My thought is he didn't actually think you were going to go through with it and probably never had any intention of paying for any of it and is using these scare tactics in order to not have to come right out and tell you that he is rescinding his offer. I think it would be in your best interest to try to find some other way to come up with the needed money and even check with your bariatric team to see if you can set up an installment payment plan with them.

Do tell!
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I'm 13 yrs out and if I could go back I wouldn't have done it. The malabsorbtion and other side effects are horrible to live the rest of your life with.
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To the gallbladder question- I had mine removed 5 weeks before my sleeve surgery because I had a stone . Gallbladder surgery is a piece of cake. In and out of hospital same day, like in 4 hours! Then a couple days rest. I considered it a break from work and time to catch up on Netflix, lol!
Here are just a few things that your dad might want to consider that are complications of obesity:
Heart disease
Stroke
High BP
Arthritis
edema
Depression
reclusive behavior
joint problems.
Many more.
A couple years ago, I had a stroke in my eyeball! yes, you read that right. My BP shot up to 210/100 and I my vision got fuzzy. Went to ER and was put on bed rest and meds for a BP caused Retinal occlusion. I still have some vision loss in my right eye. I was told I was lucky that I didn't have a full blown stroke. I am only 47.
My brother had a heart attack at age 45. He is obese as well.
I am thankful now that as I am losing weight post surgery the risks for these things are drastically decreasing.
Not to be morbid but I do think that the odds for dying in a car accident are higher than life threatening complications from WLS. Something for your dad to consider as well.

I know I keep posting, but every time I read this, it just makes me want to reach through the internet and shake your Dad. This is NOT how statistics work!!

I am 44, and haven't yet shared with my dad for the same reason. I understand! My doctor said the risks of these things being a possibility are less of a concern than what is our current daily risks from obesity. Diabetes, sleep apnea, heart disease, etc.
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Oh, by the way, I'm a nurse and in graduate school and researched the heck out of this before doing it. The major complications (leaks, serious infections) are actually quite rare. The minor common complications (nausea, vomiting) are easily manageable. The moderately bad complications (strictures) are also normally treatable, and don't happen very often. Safety-wise, WLS is safer than virtually any other abdominal surgery.
Malabsorption is only really an issue with the bypass. Some minor malnutrition with the sleeve is related to reduced intake and possibly low-carb eating, and is generally avoidable with a good Multivitamin. Dehydration is usually limited to the first few weeks post-op, and many people are able to drink enough fluids to not have any issues.
Complications are absolutely possible, but they don't tend to be as common or as serious as your dad would make them out to be.
Here's my response to a lot of the "there's a better way" nonsense. (And in case you can't tell, I get a little preachy about it!!)
http://www.theantichick.com/2016/08/05/the-easy-way-out/
Good luck!!

Your father loves you and he is worried for your safety. That is not hard to understand. The hard part is getting past that. I think it is important for him to know that you have listened and considered his concerns. It is equally important that he know that this is your decision, not his.
Life is full of what ifs. I had two friends die from this surgery years ago, which was a major factor in my putting it off for so long. But, that was years ago, and both of them were in really bad shape pre-op. When your time is up, it is up. Your chances of dying from this are about the same as dying in a wreck on the highway. As for the other complications, yeah, they are there, but there are risks we incur every day just living our lives. You know all this already. Your father does too at some level, but he has to get past the fact that it is his little girl who is going to be in danger, and there is nothing he can do about it. That is hard on a Dad, and I write that as the father of three little girls. Although they are adults, married and with children of their own, they will always be my little girls.
Talk to him and put it to him this way if you haven't already. It might not help right away, but you will have done all you can to let him know you consider his fears for your safety important.

Your dad needs to go to the Community College and take a basic statistics class.
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But you're only 10 weeks and not single thing wrong YET! By week 16 you'll have polio, gout, and a touch of bird flu. Sent from my SM-G935T using the BariatricPal App

I am 10 weeks out. And not a single thing wrong. I am so greatful I had this surgery. My mom was the same way as your dad. I am now off all of my meds except synthroid but even that went from 150 down to 100. Good luck!
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Well my dear here is another statistic that's scary.... you and I may very well be sisters because my father is the same way about me having surgery.
I love him dearly and I know it's all out of concern but he had heard of other people who have had complications and he made me (yes I'm 40 but with good daddy's you're always respectful and any age) but he had me interview them and I got this....
Two women had hernia issues, one cousin he had gallbladder issues, another lady bypassed the bypass (she gained the weight back) my PCP who honestly said she knows nothing about WLS explained that she feels that I am not big enough (BMI 40) I get that a lot and what I do is I thank people and explain to them how I truly just pack my weight in spanxs well. lol and I do!! My cousin's wedding was beautiful. My maid of honor dress was gorgeous. But I was in pain the entire time!!!
But after I reported back to my father that they all agreed they would do it all over again if they needed to he backed off. Lol I even talked to my pastor who was supportive.
People tend to think that we have other options and yes, maybe we do, but when you are in constant pain and in too much pain to do anything about it? This surgery is the best and safest way for us to maintain and work out.
This is by no means the "short cut" for me this is just getting started. I have had fibromyalgia for 4 years. The weight does not help the fatigue, slap apnea, new or old joint pain.
The bottom line is that it is our bodies and we have to make the choice on if we want to live or exist? I'm doing my surgery Feb 1st 2017 because I choose to live!!
Well....and brag on social media how I kept my new year resolution and lost 100 lbs!! Lol keep us all posted.
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I have to agree with the others... compare those statistics to your current risk for stroke, heart attack, and diabetes... I have 5 friends/family plus myself who have had the surgery ranging from 7 months ago to 9 years ago and we all agree it's the best decision we've ever made.
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@@Anna Nim, I like that your father still worries about you. If, as one might guess, he is a retiree, he seeks opportunities to occupy himself. Surgery, a new occupation, is ideal for him. Give him a kiss and don't worry about him on this.

I had surgery...sleeve and honestly i dont have many complications but i feel miserable. Yes im loosing weight but doing it natural is best. Regardless this surgery is 90% head games. Unfortunately its the worst desicion i made cause im miserable and tierd all the time...pls maybe pray on it. As for me I already did it...so I have to just make the best put of it and thank the Lord that Im ok Sent from my SM-G930T using the BariatricPal App

Lol I'm calling my attorney on my mom for that easy way out comment. If it was a stranger.. It would be a bails bond man lmao assault and battery for real.

My dad is 74 and also begged me not to do the surgery, especially in Mexico. 8 weeks oost op now, 49 yrs old, serious arthritis pain is controlled with tylenol, 82 lbs down total, 35 since surgery. I absolutely would do this again (sleeve). The first 3 to 4 weeks were tough, so was the preop phase, but is all worth it in the long run. I still have 70 to 80 lbs I need/want to lose, and I know with this tool/assistant I will keep it off. You have to work on healthy coping skills, i used to lean on alcohol more than I should, and you lose both food and wine as coping methods post op. Overall I'm so much healthier in a short period of time. Do this for you if you feel it's the right step, based on Your research, best wishes! Jeanette
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you are 40. this is your decision. I was sleeved September 9th. start weight 285. current 216. best decision I made.

I'm sorry, but my response is to ignore your dad and everyone except yourself and your doctor.
The surgery works, bottom line. Let me just debunk ONE of these so called stats...GERD. Part of the reason I got my sleeve was to get rid of GERD. You only get simple heartburn from the surgery and only if you overeat. Just like everyone else.
Please. Don't worry about the "stats". This was the best thing I've ever done. It's all about helping us with our food addiction. That is the part that the moms and dads and friends don't understand.
I wish you all the luck in the world.
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