Anna Nim

My dad is kinda the same. He keeps asking me if I'm sure and sends different people to talk to me about it. Lol

There is this Kesiha parody from the Key Of Awesome, I can't copy it here cause my computer is work locked down, but one line is the girl singing, "Oh crap not again, it's an intervention". Going in my head right now

I did the surgery. I am hurting and sipping and ready to not hurt so much, but overall everything went fine.

I know I have posted a bit about my Dad. I am STILL set on surgery tomorrow...but this is what I have to deal with!

Love him, but a LEMMING!!!

Yes. I painful am getting this. My Dad, always HWP, he claimed he was fat as a kid (not that the pics show). He may have simply trained himself as a kid to not do xyz, but he also often doesn't realize when he needs to back down (pushes himself too hard physically until it is too late).

For the rest of us mere mortals, decades of food Triggers..

Willpower isn't there. It seems to be a bunch of planning and mindfuckery.

One that I hope I can master better after surgery.

I am tired of the background noise of food urges that never stops. I would like to banish that chatter to a far corner of my mind.

I think the basics of when you will be gone/returning is enough, along with any work restrictions.

Your manager is likely getting pressure from the boss and they usually are worried about scheduling of humans (and how it will affect them), the exact nature of your surgery is likely just a curiosity.

My job (I am a teacher) has not ASKED...although ironically, on the "vauge" note, the Dr.s put on it their Baratric letterhead. LOL

THANK YOU everyone for such large and overall super supportive responses! I know I have a 100% chance of regaining anything I lose. Proven Fact. I am trying to wrap my head around the changes to come, but I think the ones I know about are better than what is currently in front of me.

Losing a bit on the Pre-op, cut my coffee way down-my soul is crying at that but I DO feel better!

Wed is the day! I wish I could take off on Tuesday, but we are down 2 people in my department. It is already going to be nuts. Wed Wed Wed.

My friend is going with me and staying with me that night when they send me home that night. The next morning she will leave, and I will be alone until my high school son comes home from early release. I had wanted my exH to come over, but since I rejected him again on his 25th request to get back together, he is feeling butt hurt. When I can drive a few days later, going to Mom's in Dallas for xmass.

Fingers Crossed!!

That's is if you get normalcy...... I am three months post op and pray to god everyday to feel better and am starting to regret having the surgery period..

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What is going on?

One thing I KNOW that all of us need and none of us get enough of is Magnesium. Depression, energy, heart issues..all helped by it. I take a lot of it, like 200% of daily value. The Magnesium Miracle (book) is helpful in this area. But, for you-what is going on? Water? Nausea?

If you are going to go the Mexico route I highly suggest you find a Bariatric Nutritionist in your area and consult with them on the Vitamin and post-op eating regimen. That way you will know exactly what is necessary to remain healthy after surgery.

I am having the Sleeve here in the US and have been given I think a good amount of nut info. Wed is the day! Thanks!

That car didn't stall! That car drove itself over a cliff bar and straight into mashed potato heaven!

LOL!!!!

This is a great post and well written too.

It does give me pause to how life will be post Sleeve and ironically is a bit depressing. I had the fantasy that I simply would not want food (like I did the first few weeks I was on Byetta that one time). I had such a deep sense of relaxation, being freed from the ADDICTION of carbs. I see it will be a bit more work. Course I have to remember it is not natural to have that much carbs around, even when I was a child the Evil Carb Hore was not that insidious in society...and neither was Facebook and Youtube,etc.. at least TV shows had commercials and ended every 30 min/hour... You are right, you can not get gas without a gauntlet of nasty temptation.

Keep it up!

Cake, bread, Pasta, Rice, Soft candy, Ice Cream all literally slide down easily. They also are so liquid or compressible that they also don't 'fill' you up long, leaving you wanting more and Sugar is addicting, MSG is addicting..you can't even go get gas without going thru the Gauntlet of High Processed food. It is almost an unwinnable battle, then get your brain involved..it is an addicted little bitch (everyone, not just overweight people). Never met a person who got obese on lean meats and veggies.

You know, I was with someone who *supposedly* was sensitive to salt (a covert, lying, narcissist..but that is a different story:) . So, I started cooking with a lot more garlic and onion powder (and cumin, chill powder, etc). To me; garlic and to a lesser extent, onion powder takes the place of salt-garlic has that tang. It took a long time to switch by taste buds, but even this long after that, I still do not dump salt on like I used to by any means.

My Dr. has two weeks of low carb (less than 30 grams a day), and while I am not perfect at it, I have lost 6 pounds in 10 days. Then it is one day of Clear Liquids before surgery.

I am also cutting caffeine. I have tapered off and made it thru the worst of the days, but I am sure missing it-but not missing the 'addiction' of it.

Sleeve set for the 14th!

I bet because you are eating more healthy and not getting the salt in your food and natural foods are less salty.

You guys are all so great

Malabsorbtion has a whole bunch of side effects in itself. Horrible gas, bloating, abdominal cramps and painting and foul BM. Not able to get anything except calories from food so you learn to eat great and you can't get the nutrition. Like superfoods such as kale and sweet potatoes. The Vitamins I take for the 4est of my life are fine but every once in awhile have to have Iron infusion and B12 and vit d extras because I get sick and blood work shows a huge lack in those. It's really hard to stay on top of and gets expensive. The dumping symptoms some times come out of the blue at the most inopportune times. That's another can of worms....

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Funny, I had severe Iron deficiency anemia, a vit D deficiency and a B12 deficiency BEFORE WLS. I just had my 6 month appt and my labs are all stellar. It's like I revamped my diet and started eating for fuel instead of fun...

I had great health the first 4 or 5 yrs I'm only in my 30s now and body is acting like 50s or 60 s with muscles tendons bones, all that stuff because of not getting natural nutrition from real food.< br />
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What are you able to do about that? Is the RYN that is the issue, if you had done Sleeve would it be less? I DO worry about that, although I think I can get around it. Maybe even juicing with a nurtabullet veggies?

We're all "mean" for pointing out errors in her father's logic but her dad is just "nervous" for her? Someone who is just concerned for her wouldn't cherry pick pieces of an article out of context of the rest of the article, then inappropriately add them up in order to scare her into thinking that 86% of the people who have WLS have a serious complication. Someone who is just concerned for her, would do some research with an open mind and not call everything that goes against their negative opinion a "joke". Someone who is just concerned would attempt to meet with the medical team and ask questions about their concerns. Plus if you read her other posts/threads - there is a history there of negative and manipulative behavior on his part.

For the OP - I know based on your other threads that you were hoping/expecting your dad to pay for part of the surgery based on him initially offering too. My thought is he didn't actually think you were going to go through with it and probably never had any intention of paying for any of it and is using these scare tactics in order to not have to come right out and tell you that he is rescinding his offer. I think it would be in your best interest to try to find some other way to come up with the needed money and even check with your bariatric team to see if you can set up an installment payment plan with them.

Wow you guys are mean. It's her dad. He's nervous for her. But I do agree you're an adult. And you know what's best for you listen to what he says but also know that those numbers aren't real. I worked on the drug study a few years back and they literally had to put in the morning that there was a chance of getting hit by a bus while taking the medication because 3 study participants we're sitting at a bus stop and a bus hit them. They had to go through lots of litigation to get that removed. So do what's best for you. But I don't see a whole lot of people on here saying how terrible it move it was for them.

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He did pay, but I think he did not expect to, he figured I would take him up on his other offers of a trainer and diet help (nowww you offer?). I did tell him I was thinking of going to Mexico, so he figured that a "chop shop" (his words, not mine), would be my next step, although I admit it would be in the summer.. Thank you for your response!

I'm 13 yrs out and if I could go back I wouldn't have done it. The malabsorbtion and other side effects are horrible to live the rest of your life with.

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So, what are your side effects?

Your dad needs to go to the Community College and take a basic statistics class.

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Funny thing, is he is a retired mechanical engineer!

Tell him he's a meddling old fart and he needs to back to f$%k off.

Also, you need to grow some backbone, you're an adult.

Come on man, he is a 72 year old man who lives alone in fear and pain, we will all get there. He is over fretting, but he is my father-that is his job.

I have issue with his math and of course I am nervous. There ARE real risks.

As for my backbone, I can assure you, I most certainly have one. You have no idea.

My Dad is hard hitting me not to have this surgery. I am 46, BMI 40, Arthritis in both knees and obviously no long-term ability to keep it off.

He is gathering stats and posting them to me in emails.

Here is an excerpt below, what do you think of his stats?

"I have never seen so much distortions and obscurations pertaining to anything as is done in bariatric surgery.

I thought knee replacement was bad with all the hype but nothing like this!!

There are hundreds of "authoritative" articles on the subject, almost all of which are blatantly designed to appeal to your emotions.

Half the forums are a joke mixed with truthful questions and experiences and often salted with carefully spin doctor messages.

The most complete reporting that I have found with only moderate spin is: www.obesitycoverage.com " Gastric By Pass vs. Gastric Sleeve Surgery."

I feel that you doing this surgery could be without a doubt the worst decision in your life.

You've got to know the probable consequences and they are not good.

Colette, this is one of those times that even if you feel that the probability of serious occurrences occurring is low...you still just do not do it..... You just don't do it because if any of the serious consequences do occur, they are so unalterably life changing negative that you can not risk it no matter what because it will be forever.

I don't get where you say the odds are in your favor? They are not.

Yes, I understand that the death rate is low, (which I am thankful for), but to have some complications are almost guaranteed. You have got to know that by now.

Read the article.

Even if you ignore the 60% to 70% probability of indigestion, nausea and dehydration, the percentage of occurrence of mild to severe complications is a huge collective 88.9% !!!

GERD 47%

Nutritional deficiency 12%

Gallstones 23%

Acute Stricture 3.5%

Deep Vein Thrombosis 1%

Staple line failure 2.4%

Total: 88.9%

Please don't go through with this. We can figure something else out. You do have options. Dad"

I have Aetna TRS, my BMI is a 41. That is morbid obese, they will cover.

I did 4 Nut vists, a psy eval (the guy gave me bubble sheets to fill out, after a short convo) and a EKG.

I got a doctor that I had JUST met to write me a letter. It had to have my 'history'.

Smart me, brought a letter for the Dr. that literally copied what Aetna said it had to have, plus my history.

That way when she walked out of the room, she would remember what I talked to her about. I also brought my healthy blood work (from the summer OBGYN, whom I also had just met) and my knee xrays, so she was coming of a place of information. I told her that she could just write "Patient reports...."

My Baratric Doctor said the letter was great.

They submitted and said that the surgery as end of Nov and I got approval in like a week-maybe less!

My surgery is the 14th of Dec and I am doing the pre-op.

Hard for others to understand how a traumatic event (death of your beloved and in my case an narcissistic relationship that took all from me) just BREAKS you and yes, it can take years..sometimes forever to recover. The shattering is real. That is what instantly got my attention. The withdraw from others is real.

My surgery in in 11 days. Besides health, hope that it marks the new phase in my life.

You look great and keep up Your Life

My Dad is flipping out on me. Worried about me dying from surgery or having a long-term complication, which I know is unlikely, but still a possibility.

He is also giving me grief.

He had originally said he would loan me the money, but I had to diet/exercise for three months (but actually 6 because of when my break it) like I was a post-baratric patient...which of course I did not do.

I tried, sorta, not really..I did have knee surgery, which blew me out and my job has been awful..no really awful.
But I COULD have gotten on low-carb and walked.

So, it makes me worried that I will fail at the Sleeve afterwards. I tell myself that; well, if I we all could do that then none of us would need the surgery, but I also know I have been a bit lazy towards even trying.

Anna nim may i ask what part of tx your having it in.

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Austin.

Trying not to fret. I start the two week diet tomorrow (low-carb, then right before liquids). I am 46 with a BMI of 41, no other health conditions other than arthritis in my knees. I've had surgery before for my knee twice and a shattered finger with no issues; other than nausea once.

My Dad had bad RK eye surgery years ago and literally can not drive at night-which has wrecked his social life. He says, what if you end up with something horribly wrong... He keeps quoting a false 7% risk of long-term serious effects. I get he is worried, I had to hear him talk a lot about his fears for knee replacement surgery and him thinking he was having a stroke when he was just dizzy from pain meds..

He is offering to give me 4K towards diet, physical trainers, etc..and then after a year, if it doesn't work, then give me 4K towards surgery. Sounds good? But, I am not interested in waiting longer. Not. One. Bit.

But it is flipping me out and I am nervous enough. I KNOW the odds are in my favor, but of course..not a guarantee. We all want the guarantee. That is what we tell ourselves:The odd are ever in our favor (see what I did there). I worry about GERD, Gallbladder disease, Dehydration, etc. I have a 15 year old son. I postponed this surgery 5 1/2 years ago for different reasons, but partially fearful if something happened because my son was so young then-but I know that 15 is young too. Since then lost weight and then gained weight and kept it on. I don't even want to lose weight anymore for appearances, but just to slow down the rate of decay

Anyway... that is it in a nutshell.

Thanks for listening.

I guess what annoys me, is he spent DECADES trashing my size. When I was this height and younger, he would even tell people about his "Big" daughter...and nowwwwww I am not too big for surgery??

I contacted my surgeon to get the exact amount due by Dec 2 and they gave me a different amount. See, I have to pay 5k out of pocket and 20%. I wanted to know the exact 20% and to whom to pay the 5k. The guy was confused, I said, get back to me and I need it in writing...that way I can say, "Ok Dad, here we are...". I will contact them again on Monday (I will be back in Texas at that time.)

I have asked for help before, but not much. Mainly, when I was getting a divorce and my ex took all funds and I was having to fight a custody battle with no funds (He did kindly give me 5K for that fun time).