reframe

I am not sure I have great advice but I don't want your question to go unanswered! I would say you took the first step by coming here and asking for help. My number one piece of advice is go see a therapist if you can at all. That will help. (Call your surgeon for a referral of someone who works with bariatric patients.) At the very least, seek out a local support group if you cannot go to a therapist. Secondly, maybe try a reset by just doing shakes for a few days and go through that "withdrawal" of the addictive foods again. That may help you get back to where you were in your mind the week before your surgery. Spend some time during those few days really thinking about why you did this and how far you have come. Every time during those few days of shakes that you want to reach for food or think you are hungry, go lock yourself in your room or in your car or somewhere away from food and really concentrate on your accomplishment this far. Why did you have the surgery? What was your first big NSV? What was your favorite NSV? Write it down. Start a journal and turn to that journal instead of eating.
You have lost 105 pounds! That is amazing! You have the drive. You can totally do this!

I have a sleeve so this might be different, but I make sugar free ice cream all the time. I use half and half, almond milk, oikos triple zero Greek Yougert, and eggs for the base. Then I use stevia and a variety of flavorings. I add 3 scoops of unflavored Protein powder. It has 22 grams of Protein per serving. My favorites are Peanut Butter where I add PB2 powder, and chocolate almond using crushed almonds and coco powder.
This way I get ice cream and meet my protein goals.

I just made a Peanut Butter smoothie with vanilla Unjury Protein Powder. I followed a recipe given to me by my nutritionist- it is amazing!!!

I agree. It is really difficult to pick a goal weight when I have been overweight my entire life. At the moment, I have picked a reassess weight instead: 190. When I get to 190 I will reassess whether I am happy there or want to go lower!

I like this. I think I'll be copying you. [emoji1]

Hello to all my fellow February surgery pals ????????
I am all set for Feb. 8th.
Feeling excited and nervous but it is SO comforting to know I'm not going through this alone. I really appreciate everyone's shares.

I 100% had this same feeling. Unlike a lot of people who have had this surgery, I didn't hate myself and I never thought I was "gross" or "ugly". Once I started the process of WLS though, I definitely went through a long phase of feeling hideous and not wanting to go out or see anyone because they would see how fat I am. Of course, I looked the same as I always did, but I think once I realized that being as overweight as I was/am was not an option to live a healthy life and my blinders had been removed, I could no longer pretend or ignore that I had to get healthy and I had to do something about it.
The further away from surgery I get, the more I exercise and eat healthy, the better I feel about myself. Losing weight is a bonus. The feeling will pass but yes, I totally understand what you're feeling.

Thank you for the replies everyone. I'm fortunate that I don't have to deal with coworkers right now. I won't be working until spring, and then when I do start a job no one will have known my habits before to notice the difference. What they see will just be how I am in their eyes. I also don't have to deal with my own family - they live 2400 miles away. My mother knows I've been dieting since September, so by the time I see them this October it will have been long enough that my weight loss will be passable. Eating so little will be easy to pass off on that trip as well - I often get motion sickness, and its not uncommon for me to not feel well for a few days after such a long drive, so they're already used to that. So no worries in either of those departments.
Its just the hubby's family I have to deal with. Its funny, just last night I was thinking of something along mykdzmom's line. I was thinking I should start trying to eat my meals before our get togethers so that they get used to seeing me not eat. When they ask I'll just explain that I ate already and am full, and that way (hopefully) by the time I'm post-surgery and would have to lie about it, it will be old hat and no one will be asking anymore. Then I just have to deal with our occasional family restaurant outings, but I'm sure I can get through those - they're typically more focused on the conversation at restaurants and less likely to notice idiosyncrasies.
As for the weight loss, unfortunately I have been sharing numbers. When I hit the 25lb mark in October I was so proud and told everyone. Now several people ask every time they see me. At 50lbs loss it started to feel awkward, and now at almost 80 lbs I'm flat out uncomfortable. I've decided that from now on when asked by anyone aside from other bariatric patients, I'm just going to say "I don't think I'm going to share that anymore. Its making me too focused on what I'm losing and not as focused as I need to be on HOW I'm losing it." This is entirely true anyway. I was getting overly occupied with maintaining a steady decline (until I hit my first stall over Christmas and decided to just let it go), because I knew someone was going to ask eventually, and if the number wasn't smaller it would be met with a disappointed "Oh..." and I would feel like crap. I don't want to feel like crap. I want to be proud of what I've achieved so far and not have to worry about outdoing myself. Anyway, I'm sure that by not sharing my weight anymore the loss won't be as obvious, since everyone sees me weekly anyway. Its not like we only get together on birthdays and holidays where there can be months in between making weight loss very noticeable.
Down the road as I feel more comfortable and strong in my ability to educate on gastric bypass (so I can effectively field questions and correct misinformation), its entirely likely that I'll end up sharing. But until then, I think I'm happy with this plan. Thanks for helping me work it out guys! <3

Hello to all my fellow February surgery pals ????????
I am all set for Feb. 8th.
Feeling excited and nervous but it is SO comforting to know I'm not going through this alone. I really appreciate everyone's shares.

Hello to all my fellow February surgery pals ????????
I am all set for Feb. 8th.
Feeling excited and nervous but it is SO comforting to know I'm not going through this alone. I really appreciate everyone's shares.

Yeah, man I so appreciate the comments of support and the 8 point list, far more than I can say. The responses here really made my day!! thank you all so much, pedro

Glad you posted those 8 statements of positive thinking! Don't let any of those self doubts or negative energy sway you from your decision to change your life. You know why you're here; you got here because of that very focused desire and drive. That will sustain and drive you on to your goal. You know it will be ups and downs sometimes, but you have this place to come to, and your own personal support people. By posting your private thoughts and fears you, and as others have too, you help us all confront those demons ourselves. It's empowering ????!! Good luck and best thoughts!

Thank you so much Pedro for posting your thoughts, I can relate so much.
I am 6 days pre op and my mind is definitely playing tricks on me as well. I feel the doubt seeping in about whether this is the right decision for me. Truth is in my heart I know it is but I'm so afraid of regretting my decision or having WLS change my life in negative ways.
I keep reminding myself that
1. This is not an impulsive decision
2. nor has it been only my idea (I'm working with a great support system who have worked/known me for many years through my weight struggles)
3. I am not the same person or in the same place as I was when I got the lap band and had so much difficulty with it
4. I'm not expecting "a miracle", "easy weight loss" or "smooth sailing" emotionally or physically, this is a life long change
5. I can reach out for support now which I could/would never do before
6. I do not need to be perfect
7. I cannot continue on at this weight and with these health consequences
8. I deserve it!
Wishing you well!

Thank you so much Pedro for posting your thoughts, I can relate so much.
I am 6 days pre op and my mind is definitely playing tricks on me as well. I feel the doubt seeping in about whether this is the right decision for me. Truth is in my heart I know it is but I'm so afraid of regretting my decision or having WLS change my life in negative ways.
I keep reminding myself that
1. This is not an impulsive decision
2. nor has it been only my idea (I'm working with a great support system who have worked/known me for many years through my weight struggles)
3. I am not the same person or in the same place as I was when I got the lap band and had so much difficulty with it
4. I'm not expecting "a miracle", "easy weight loss" or "smooth sailing" emotionally or physically, this is a life long change
5. I can reach out for support now which I could/would never do before
6. I do not need to be perfect
7. I cannot continue on at this weight and with these health consequences
8. I deserve it!
Wishing you well!

Hello to all my fellow February surgery pals ????????
I am all set for Feb. 8th.
Feeling excited and nervous but it is SO comforting to know I'm not going through this alone. I really appreciate everyone's shares.

Hello to all my fellow February surgery pals ????????
I am all set for Feb. 8th.
Feeling excited and nervous but it is SO comforting to know I'm not going through this alone. I really appreciate everyone's shares.