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TraceySLP1

LAP-BAND Patients
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Everything posted by TraceySLP1

  1. hi, im glad i found this site because i really need some support. i was banded 5/21/03. i lost a little over 50 pounds, had 2 fills i think the first year, and then began gaining it all back . i learned how to eat around the band, ive not really been restricted much at least for the last 2 years, and can eat everything and anything. now im embarassed to call my doctor and ask about a fill, i'm mortified that after being so motivated and going through all those tests and an OPERATION, ive failed. i dont know if my pouch is stretched, im sure it is. the soda rule i remember hearing about but i didnt know it could do that and ive been drinking soda for years. im trying to get up the courage to call my doctor on monday. to make matters worse my 2 1/2 year relationship just broke up and the thought of dating the way i look now makes me shake. i just want the doctor to fill me so much that i can only drink water at this point, but im afraid ive messed everything up. im hoping someone out there will have some insight into what im going through....my 5 year bandervsary is coming up and if i dont do something soon i'll be at my starting weight by then. thanks so much for listening,,,,er,,,,reading
  2. TraceySLP1

    Why are YOU Fat?

    first let me say, im fat because i ate too much and exercised to little. that being said, i believe the reason i ate too much started when i was around 14, i started to go through that stage where i was going from skinny pre-teen to junk-food-eating-with-friends teenager. this did not go unnoticed by my father, who was married to my constantly struggling with her weight mother. so to "help" me, he started watching everything i ate, and commenting on it. my entire home life became filled with shame-inducing comments like "you really dont need that", "what are u eating NOW?" and "why dont u run downstairs for your mother, u could use the exercise". most of the time, a pointed look was more than sufficient to induce shame. my younger brother enjoyed the ammunition supplied by my self-loathing and shame, and used it every chance he got. "go join weight watchers" "fatso" "call jenny craig", etc. it was fun times. but i was smart, when i was left alone in the house i would binge from the second they were gone until the car pulled up. and i hid food and the evidence. i would eat things that didnt even taste good, just as long as there was LOTS of it, and i thought it wouldnt be missed. add to that the years of hiding in my bedroom escaping into books rather than being active, and the YEARS and YEARS of diets after diets, from fads to Optifast to weight watchers to slim fast ,.,,,,every single one ....and gaining it all back plus...... AND that i found that food, and binging in particular (in private of course) provides a pleasant numbing feeling. its a powerful drug. i still struggle with the secret eating. im still uncomfortable eating in front of others. the thought of a dinner date scares the hell out of me. im trying to get back on track with the band, and working out, and trying to stop this cycle of eating and shame and numbing and self-loathing. when are they coming out with the band for the BRAIN? lol its no WONDER im fat!
  3. TraceySLP1

    i even failed at this....

    Hi everyone and thank you for ur words of encouragement. I just called Dr. Gellman's office, and have an appt to go see him on 1/25. He doesnt take oxford anymore :eek: so i have to pay 150 for an office visit, but he does fills via a radiologist so that should be covered. wish me luck thanks again!

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