HunnyBun

Jodi, the problem is, he only did a few surgeries. He downplayed it alot too. He said that it's so simple and easy. I know it may not be the hardest procedure, but I know that placement of the band can have a lot to do with slippage, so I would not want someone who takes it so lightly.

After meeting with him, I just KNEW he wasn't a good surgeon. I had a feeling. The personw ho came with me to the consultation told me that he does not approve of this doctor either. I'm just lost because I am afraid of being operated on by an overconfident jerk who will blame complications on me.

He is very inexperienced and has a bad attitude. I am worried about having complications like slippage, erosion and him being a jerk about it.

When I asked him questions about complications, he said that they will absolutely not happen if I do everything right. I KNOW that's BS and I am afraid of being in his care in case I do have something go wrong. He is also about two hours away and requires that I drive there every Wednesday for 16 weeks to do a pre op diet. Then, after surgery I am required to drive there again for 12 weeks for post op support meetings. The problem with this is that I don't have anyone who can care for my son while I am there.

I know that complications from Lap Band are sometimes serious and I don't want to be in the care of an a$$hole. Plus, if something goes wrong and say I can't swallow my food, I am two hours away from his office, where he might not even be. He doesn't have partners or a nursing staff. He works in a hospital and is the only lap band surgeon there.

I already gave him a shot, I met with him, did 4 of the 16 weeks, and I realized that I just don't trust him. I feel like it's too much of a risk.

I wish I could just ignore my fears and go with him, but if something goes terribly wrong and God forbid I get really sick, I would never be able to forgive myself. My son deserves a mom that has good care. I can't take the chance.

For those of you who don't know me (probably most of you LOL) my name is Maggie. I am a 24 year old single mom and I weigh about 275lbs.

I have talked to or seen pretty much every lap band doc in the state of Illinois over the past two years and so far found only one who would be able to do my procedure. The only problem with him is, I can't stand him. He is a smart mouth, not experienced, and I wouldn't let him touch me with a 10 foot pole, let alone a scalpel.

Anyway, the reason why I can not find a doctor who could help me is because I am on public aid and no lap band doctor I called accepts my insurance.

Self paying is not an option since I only make as much as my bills, food and living costs a month. I don't have savings.

I can't take up another job because I don't have anyone who could help out with my son. My mom works evenings and other family wouldn't be willing to help.

I thought about taking a loan to pay for the surgery, but I quickly found out that my credit is not good enough. *sigh*

For the past two years I have been trying to get this accomplished and it is becoming such a pain in my life. I just want to be banded and become the happy and fun person that is hiding behind this fat body and sad face.

So, I decided I need to get my $hit together and do something that will result in either finding a doctor that will do it for free, or finding the money to have the surgery.

Some starter ideas I have are:

1. Become a hooker - but I won't.

2. Marry an immigrant for money so he can get papers - seems like a crazy idea but it just might work?

3. Find a different job that will have insurance - but I have the perfect job right now, I work the exact hours that my son is in school. If I quit I might never find anything so flexible again.

4. Sit on the corner and hold out a sign that reads 'Collecting for surgery, please help' - and die of shame.

5. ?????

Funny, crazy, plain stupid, and great ideas welcome.

Put your brains together and please help me find a way to get my band.

I am desperate. :think

Thanks!!!

Thats funny!

It's weird but after reading that I feel a little sad that I may not be able to get the band. I want all those things, the good and the bad.

I was doing a weight loss program at a chicago hospital. I was following a 1200kcal diet but had only lost 2 pounds in a week. The doctor had bigger expectations so he told me "Just don't eat! You have got to stop eating. You will see your weight drop if you just stop eating"

Ok, maybe he ment 'don't overeat' but the way he phrased it, I was PISSED and wrote a complaint.

I did not sign up for that kind of treatment.

Other than that, I have been told not to eat for 3 days to shrink my stomach, drink lots of vinegar, smoke, etc. Just ridiculus stuff. None of it healthy.

excellent idea

LOL those are cute.

I love the elderly. I used to work with them (or their medications) and all the stories the nurses shared were hilarious.

Have you tried Chinese medicine to lose weight?

What did your treatment include?

Would you recommend it? Why or why not?

Thanks!

Well then here is another thought.

Undereating and throwing up is just as much of an eating disorder as compulsive overeating. Yet, anorexic and bulemic girls were welcome on the runway and overweight girls weren't. Now they are turning it around, they are introducing overweight girls to the runway and banning underweight ones.

Do we want 'fat' to be the hype? I don't think it's any better than sickly thin.

IMO they should focus on 'average'. Mix it up, some to be thin, some to be chubby. No extremes necessary.

Kind of funny... in the first post...

"then I hear someone call me a fat bitch and I want to cut my fat off with a knife."

So you want to cut your fat off, but you don't want to do anything about the "bitch" part of the insult? :heh:

It's sad that "fat" is what sticks with us, even though it's only ancillary to the *real* insult.

When someone calls me a fat bitch, I don't get mad about the bitch part because I'm not one. I am however fat and they didn't get that part wrong.

The 'fat bitch' was just an example, sometimes it's fatass, fatso, pig, cow, etc... people don't like me because I'm fat. I don't care about those people anyway, what bothers me most is that it is embarassing, humiliating, and there is nothing I can do to stop it. Wait, there is... I can lose weight.

Ugh, the girl in the first photo looks ill. I wouldn't want her in my show. I bet noone even noticed the dress because they were all looking at her ribs! Girl needs to eat!

Heres how I feel. I was 28 when I was banded. I hated myself, yep, thought I was as fat as they come...ugly as a horses ass. I had no confidence and no self esteem.

I couldnt play with my kids much or do alot with them. When I decided to look at WLS, I decided because I didnt want to be fat and ugly anymore. I didnt want people whispering about me anymore. I didnt want people snickering when I walked past anymore. I wanted to be able to wear nice clothes. I really dont think I can think of a time leading up to my surgery that I thought, I am doing this for my health.

Am I wrong for thinking like that...no...because it is my opinion, and it is how I think. All my problems from being fat were psychological when I was banded so I really had nothing making me think I am going to have a heart attack/diabetes, get cancer etc.

For me it was all about fitting in and being happy and for once in my life I kinda am.

I know exactly what you mean. Thank you for sharing with us :)

Congratulations! Such a beautiful family. I can't believe you had enough strength to put on makeup while at the hospital lol, when I gave birth I looked like a dirty mop. Greasy hair and swollen like a baloon. You look great!

If anyone is planning on having surgery for any reason other than improved health, YOU NEED COUNSELING!!!

GeezerSue, I am sure you don't mean noone any harm but when I read this sentence from your previous post I assumed you meant all surgery. That's why I went into defence mode and wrote my last post.

You know...not to hurt any feelings here...but I would NEVER have any surgery to "fit in" with what "society" approves of or doesn't approve of...and I fear there may be a DSM-IV diagnosis code for those who do.

If anyone is planning on having surgery for any reason other than improved health, YOU NEED COUNSELING!!! That is because if you qualify for surgery it is probably because you are morbidly obese...that is "diseased" obesity..."sickly" obesity, "pathological" obesity, etc.

If you are so deeply in denial that you don't realize that your obesity is killing you--at the same time your insurance company will cover the procedure--you really need to get some PROFESSIONAL HELP in making an honest appraisal of your current health status.

None of this was mean to be mean...but it was meant to bring home a point. If your obesity is NOT killing you, there is no logical or moral or medical reason to have any surgery.

Do you think that anyone who has ever had cosmetic surgery needs counseling?

I think it is pretty common that people have surgery to make themselves look better. I don't think they need counseling. It's very normal to want to fit in and be a part of the crowd. It's also normal to be affected by society standard and it's normal to feel insecure when you don't fit in with what is 'in'.

Some people feel social pressure to look acceptable because of different reasons. One might have low self esteem because of the ugly duckling condition while in school. Some may get the pressure from the work environment (media etc). Some might just be so into the fashion scene that they feel like they 'need' to look great in order for their life to be what they want it to be. I consider myself one of those people.

I love fashion and it's a huge part of my life. I go to fashion shows, buy fashion books, follow the designers and trends. I am in love with adorable clothes and the only thing keeping me from being able to wear them is my size. If I lose weight I will be able to wear all the beautiful outfits I have boxed up all over the house. I love clothes so much that I buy them regardless if I can wear them or not. Not many ofcourse, but when I see something I can't live without I can at least know it's there in the box waiting to be worn some day.

I'm the only person I know who knows so much about fashion and designers but doesn't wear designer clothes. Nothing designer fits. Even if I was able to buy designer clothes, I don't think they'd look great stretched over my big belly.

Do I need to see a counselor because I want my body to reflect who I am inside?

Lap band for me has a lot to do with health, but in the end even if I was healthy I would still probably have surgery so I can look the way I feel.

I guess I have mixed feelings on this. On one hand I wish I was happy as fat as long as I am healthy, and on the other hand I want to be a cute, sexy fashionista that wears Manolos.

I've read some threads on here regarding colon cleansing and figured this might be the right place to ask.

I think that a lot of people (including me) have intestinal worms and don't know it. I'm too embarassed to ask a doctor and think I might want to try a do-it-yourself home remedy treatment.

Do any of you know much about this topic and how to treat oneself at home? :embarassed:

Thanks!

We are all so eager to lose weight and we do unhealthy things to achieve that goal. I wonder sometimes if being fat would be so terrible if it was socially acceptable?

I generally don't like being fat because I feel like an outsider. I feel like the ugly person in my group, even though I know I have a prettier face/hair/attitude than some other girls I know.

If fat was 'normal' and skinny was 'ugly' would we all want to lose weight?

Would we overlook the physical discomfort and be happy with the attention we get?

Sometimes I get this crazy idea that being fat isn't so bad as long as I eat right and excercise, but then I hear someone call me a fat bitch and I want to cut my fat off with a knife.

If fat really was beautiful (by society standard) would we all be getting banded?

I absolutely love Jean Paul Gaultier, my favorite designer. I'm just surprised at him showing a plus size woman in his show when he does not make plus size clothing. If he was really trying to make a point, why not just start a new plus size line? I have a feeling that there is more to this story and we're just outsiders that don't get it.

While funny, it made me so sad for Joe. Poor guy! lol

PB is when the food you've eaten gets stuck and doesn't come past the band. It then comes back up into your mouth. It doesn't contain stomach acid so it doesn't taste like throwup. PB stands for Productive Burp.

Sliming is when something gets stuck and your body is trying to get it down by creating a lot of saliva which should help the stuck food go down. I hear it's very unpleasant.

I am not banded and the answers I gave you are things that I read on this forum

Who do you pay to? The doctor himself or a bank that gave you the loan? If you're paying directly to the doctor, screw him and don't pay. He is not in the USA and probably can't sue you. If it is an american bank that loaned you the money, they can turn you over to a collection agency. It still is a long way before they would sue you. They will sue in your state, if it ever happens.

Anyway, threats are nothing, don't let them intimidate you. I doubt he can file a civil case in another state.

Congratulations

Hey I know it's a little late but if there is room for one more, please let me know.

I am a big girl and generally don't mind of a man is large too. The only problem I have had dating a large man was that his tummy was large. When we hugged, his belly pushed me away. Sex wasn't even an option, and because of that I decided that I will not date a man that has a very large tummy.

What I find most attractive is a tall man that is not thin. I like a manly man, 6'+ and anywhere between 200 and 300lbs is fine. I don't find myself very attracted to men who are skinny, but often I do find myself attracted to men with a gorgeous face.

At a cafe I go to there is this man that always comes in. He is probably 5'10, 150lbs, blonde and has a face of a 17 year old. He is so adorable that every time he looks at me I blush and turn away. If he ever said anything to me I would probably pass out on the spot.

I guess that it all comes down to the person havign that certain something.

Another good example is, I met this man. He is exactly the kind of man I described earlier, tall, meaty, handsome... but when I met him for coffee, I couldn't even force myself to feel the attraction. He was such a loser that I was bothered when he tried to hold my hand. I couldn't wait to get away from him. Funny thing about him is that when I first saw him I said to myself 'YUM!' lol

Sigh, I need a b/f.

I love spanx! The only problem I have is the price. I don't mind paying that much for something that lasts, but the capri length Spanx had a run in them after the second time I wore them. That is a big issue for something that costs almost as much as pants!

Anyone have any solutions for this?