BarrySue

You'll find quite a few of us are actually licensed medical professionals with strong backgrounds in nutrition and other relevant information. That doesn't mean we know everything, but it does mean there is legitimate education and experience behind our advice. Not only are there a TON of nurses on this site, but some of them even work in bariatrics. Don't be so quick to dismiss different perspectives. You could potentially miss out on helpful advice.

You seem to have it all figured out. You are the most knowledgeable person on the website. People just don't understand that you're allowed to shoot down any legitimate advice because you're simply wiser and more Enlightened, like a gymrat Yoda.
It does beg the question, though -- why are you here asking questions if you're too good to take advice?

You'll find quite a few of us are actually licensed medical professionals with strong backgrounds in nutrition and other relevant information. That doesn't mean we know everything, but it does mean there is legitimate education and experience behind our advice. Not only are there a TON of nurses on this site, but some of them even work in bariatrics. Don't be so quick to dismiss different perspectives. You could potentially miss out on helpful advice.

You'll find quite a few of us are actually licensed medical professionals with strong backgrounds in nutrition and other relevant information. That doesn't mean we know everything, but it does mean there is legitimate education and experience behind our advice. Not only are there a TON of nurses on this site, but some of them even work in bariatrics. Don't be so quick to dismiss different perspectives. You could potentially miss out on helpful advice.

You seem to have it all figured out. You are the most knowledgeable person on the website. People just don't understand that you're allowed to shoot down any legitimate advice because you're simply wiser and more Enlightened, like a gymrat Yoda.
It does beg the question, though -- why are you here asking questions if you're too good to take advice?

Something bitter that hasn't quite aged enough yet. Vintage 2016, perhaps?

Babbs, your posts give me life.
This forum should not be an infinite plane of eggshells we tiptoe over. It is absolutely a place of support, and sometimes, reality checks and doses of humility are supportive. I think there is great value in having people check you on your bad habits, not just when they are diet-related, but when they are behavior-related too.
Asking for validation mislabeled as advice, or demanding that opinions be bubble-wrapped and lukewarm so as not to appear judgmental or finger-wagging? Believe it or not, demanding these kinds of emotional cushions likely play a bigger role in your weight loss struggle than you'd like to think.
food is comfort and self protection. So is demanding others pull their punches when you ask for advice. Both can be destructive, and neither really helps you in the long run.
P.S. Slapping the "bully" or "shame" label onto anything that makes you feel uncomfortable does nothing but shut down honest discourse and let you swallow down moral superiority like a deep-fried carb. Don't do it.
**Edit: I know the convo has moved on, but I still wanted to address some earlier points. Back to your regularly programmed macronutrient tallies

I don't go outside. Seriously. I'm waaaaay too Irish to survive direct sunlight anyhow, and I prefer to stay tucked away in air-conditioned spaces. When I go to day-long events though, I simply plan for rest and rehydration every four hours.

I myself come to these threads for the entertainment value! Wouldn't miss em for the world!!!

You seem to be under the delusion that you can rant about something in a vacuum... we have the ability to rant right back.
If you didn't care, why did you bother to respond?
"When all is said and done, usually more has been said than done. "

Having been a member of many forums on a diverse array of subjects, I would say that the the people who "ruin" forums are the Thought Police who try to force people to post things their way, like the OP.
"If you don't have anything nice to say, keep it to yourself" is simply code for "if I don't like what you have to say, I'm going to deny you the ability to say it."
We're all adults here; Pollyanna syndrome isn't attractive nor is it warranted.
"When all is said and done, usually more has been said than done. "

MySpace became popular when I was a teen (I know I'm dating myself here, haha), and I learned then that any gathering on the internet will inevitably have some drama, most often either because of people who take pleasure in creating it, the sense of liberty that comes when you're not in a face-to-face situation and feel less guarded and restrained, or simply due to misunderstandings that are the result of communication that lacks important cues like body language and inflection. I see the same patterns on almost every online community I've ever ventured into. There's a line from a John Green book I read years ago that I've tried to apply both to my online interactions and in my personal life - "be a filter, not a sponge." I retain what is useful to me, and try to filter out what isn't. If you view something as toxic or capable of ruining your experience on this forum or elsewhere, and you don't have any obligation to sponge it up, then try to just filter it out.

The block / ignore function is amazing. Use it. I do.
Or if you're that irritated, just leave.
Please.

I think that pot stirring posts like this are intentionally looking for the "accused" to come and start "misbehaving" so the OP can feel justified in feeling indignant and ruffled and so they can report the posts righteously. I've been called a b!tch, a bully, a mean girl. I've been lied about, conspired against (it's funny that there is always one "mole" that carries the story back), etc. I've never reported a post unless it was threatening, profanity filled or spam. And I've never reported anyone who has lashed out at me. Why? Because I'm bigger than that. Take that how you will. Quite honestly, I don't look at WHO wrote something before I reply, I just reply. I don't care who I agree with/disagree with/laugh with/laugh at. My opinion is based on the post, not the author. In turn, I do quite often notice that my posts will be almost stalked and commented on one after another by certain people and it seems quite intentional. It's actually quite amusing.
As for name calling? I don't believe in it and I don't participate in it. In fact, most of the people who are called "bullies" or "mean girls" or "cliques" DON'T call names, it's the people who go on the defensive for no real reason that start in with that nonsense and the people who cry out against it are the FIRST in line to "like" it.
It continues to amaze me that the people who are so angry or so riled up by certain posters don't just click on their profile (oh wait, they already do so they can follow their activity)... I don't understand why they don't just click on the BLOCK button while they are ON their profile so they never have to see another word that is said by whomever it is that offends them. Wouldn't that be the logical thing to do?
As for the last line of this post. It is so much like the prayer thing... The post itself is digging and aggressive, followed up with sunshine and light. If this is one's idea of being "kind to one another", perhaps the word kind needs to be redefined.
My best advice? Take what you want, leave the rest. Friend those you love, block those you don't. If you have beef with someone, take a moment to message them directly instead of starting up threads like this. You never know what you may have understood or misunderstood.

And then there are the know it all newbies ruining it for everyone else.
When I was new, I craved information. I hung on every veterans word, hoping to be as successful as they have been. Was I slapped down a couple of times in the process? Sure. But I'm not a butt hurt puss y who gets triggered every time someone gives me a little tough love. Those veterans that you speak of are the reason I've been successful. Honestly. Without their guidance and information and yes, tough love, I wouldn't be a size 6 and maintaining, have perfect labs, and running up to 3 miles every other day. I was one who didn't pursue after care with my surgeon, so everything I learned, I learned from this site. But some people are so set on squealing like the little piggies they are, they can't learn anything in the process. Most are looking for justification to eat around their surgeries, and if they don't get it, go on the defensive and then have the usual suspects white knighting for them and then ganging up on people, complaining about the big meanies, telling people how they should be responding, and messaging Alex to complain about the said meanies like we are in grade school telling the teacher. It's getting quite old, actually.
Didn't like a member? I either stayed out of the thread, or put them on ignore. Problem solved.
If I get banned for this post, I honestly don't give a shiat anymore. I've really grown to abhor this site anyway for the reasons stated above. I've got other forms of support.
How's that for ruining this forum?

Then why do they put TWELVE in the carton!?!?!??!!

Surgeons have the same human emotions as the rest of us, and can go on the defensive when an accusation has been made against them. Instead of wanting to confront him, I'd approach it as confronting the issues you've experienced, and having a conversation with him about them. Ask about having some tests just to make sure everything is as it should be. Once you've gotten the results of those tests, go from there. It's possible something is amiss with your sleeve, and it's possible that for various reasons you can just consume more without feeling the same restrictions. As a younger man you're going to have different dietary needs and stomach capacity than your mom and aunt, even if you've all had the same surgery. I've noticed a variation in how much I can eat. Sometimes I get full very fast, and other times I can eat more, and it's my mind rather than my stomach that has to put on the brakes.
I do think it's good advice to try to portion out your food when you put it on your plate so that you're not going to be mindlessly eating more than intended. This is something I've had to train myself to do. If you only put a small portion on your plate, then when it's been eaten you'll have to make the conscious decision whether to add more to it. You're forced to be mindful. If you just have a lot of food on your plate, or you're grazing from a bag, then you can get distracted by conversations and the like, and keep eating until every bite is gone.

Why do you eat so much at each sitting ?
Cramming food down our gullets isn't really the gameplan is it ?
Your capacity may always be greater than the recommended amounts per meal.

You'll find quite a few of us are actually licensed medical professionals with strong backgrounds in nutrition and other relevant information. That doesn't mean we know everything, but it does mean there is legitimate education and experience behind our advice. Not only are there a TON of nurses on this site, but some of them even work in bariatrics. Don't be so quick to dismiss different perspectives. You could potentially miss out on helpful advice.

You'll find quite a few of us are actually licensed medical professionals with strong backgrounds in nutrition and other relevant information. That doesn't mean we know everything, but it does mean there is legitimate education and experience behind our advice. Not only are there a TON of nurses on this site, but some of them even work in bariatrics. Don't be so quick to dismiss different perspectives. You could potentially miss out on helpful advice.

Babbs, your posts give me life.
This forum should not be an infinite plane of eggshells we tiptoe over. It is absolutely a place of support, and sometimes, reality checks and doses of humility are supportive. I think there is great value in having people check you on your bad habits, not just when they are diet-related, but when they are behavior-related too.
Asking for validation mislabeled as advice, or demanding that opinions be bubble-wrapped and lukewarm so as not to appear judgmental or finger-wagging? Believe it or not, demanding these kinds of emotional cushions likely play a bigger role in your weight loss struggle than you'd like to think.
food is comfort and self protection. So is demanding others pull their punches when you ask for advice. Both can be destructive, and neither really helps you in the long run.
P.S. Slapping the "bully" or "shame" label onto anything that makes you feel uncomfortable does nothing but shut down honest discourse and let you swallow down moral superiority like a deep-fried carb. Don't do it.
**Edit: I know the convo has moved on, but I still wanted to address some earlier points. Back to your regularly programmed macronutrient tallies

You're fine. You need to learn moderation, not deprivation. I pigged out and ate a ton of halloween candy a few months ago. I went camping last month and ate smores and a bunch of other naughty no-no foods. Not only am I fine, but I proved that I can be a normal, functioning human being that occasionally indulges.

I don't understand why the Quest bars are so popular. They are almost $3 each and taste terrible. I have tried so many flavors and they are all horrible

You'll find quite a few of us are actually licensed medical professionals with strong backgrounds in nutrition and other relevant information. That doesn't mean we know everything, but it does mean there is legitimate education and experience behind our advice. Not only are there a TON of nurses on this site, but some of them even work in bariatrics. Don't be so quick to dismiss different perspectives. You could potentially miss out on helpful advice.

Ugh, sleeping was the worst. I was always a stomach/side sleeper, and it was 2-3 months before I could return to normal. I also had to prop myself up on 4-5 pillows, especially for the first four weeks. It was annoying, but eventually it got better.