JessterNC

I am so glad I am not the only one feeling this way! No real problems for me, I keep waiting for something bad to happen.
I seem to be able to hit my Water and Protein with no problems and I can tell pretty easily that I am full now. I have wondered more than once that maybe they didn't really do anything to me except punch holes in me and pump me full of gas.
This morning I weighed 264, down over 20 pounds from my highest weight in the last 2 months and I had my surgery 2 weeks ago Thursday.
I am ready for the dreaded stall and am sure that somewhere along the way I will encounter problems, but after the major problems I have had after operations in the last 18 months, this has been a great experience.

I am so glad I am not the only one feeling this way! No real problems for me, I keep waiting for something bad to happen.
I seem to be able to hit my Water and Protein with no problems and I can tell pretty easily that I am full now. I have wondered more than once that maybe they didn't really do anything to me except punch holes in me and pump me full of gas.
This morning I weighed 264, down over 20 pounds from my highest weight in the last 2 months and I had my surgery 2 weeks ago Thursday.
I am ready for the dreaded stall and am sure that somewhere along the way I will encounter problems, but after the major problems I have had after operations in the last 18 months, this has been a great experience.

I am so glad I am not the only one feeling this way! No real problems for me, I keep waiting for something bad to happen.
I seem to be able to hit my Water and Protein with no problems and I can tell pretty easily that I am full now. I have wondered more than once that maybe they didn't really do anything to me except punch holes in me and pump me full of gas.
This morning I weighed 264, down over 20 pounds from my highest weight in the last 2 months and I had my surgery 2 weeks ago Thursday.
I am ready for the dreaded stall and am sure that somewhere along the way I will encounter problems, but after the major problems I have had after operations in the last 18 months, this has been a great experience.

I am so glad I am not the only one feeling this way! No real problems for me, I keep waiting for something bad to happen.
I seem to be able to hit my Water and Protein with no problems and I can tell pretty easily that I am full now. I have wondered more than once that maybe they didn't really do anything to me except punch holes in me and pump me full of gas.
This morning I weighed 264, down over 20 pounds from my highest weight in the last 2 months and I had my surgery 2 weeks ago Thursday.
I am ready for the dreaded stall and am sure that somewhere along the way I will encounter problems, but after the major problems I have had after operations in the last 18 months, this has been a great experience.

I am so glad I am not the only one feeling this way! No real problems for me, I keep waiting for something bad to happen.
I seem to be able to hit my Water and Protein with no problems and I can tell pretty easily that I am full now. I have wondered more than once that maybe they didn't really do anything to me except punch holes in me and pump me full of gas.
This morning I weighed 264, down over 20 pounds from my highest weight in the last 2 months and I had my surgery 2 weeks ago Thursday.
I am ready for the dreaded stall and am sure that somewhere along the way I will encounter problems, but after the major problems I have had after operations in the last 18 months, this has been a great experience.

Jesster, if anyone deserves an "easy time" with surgery, after all you've endured, it's you.
Congratulations!

Congrats on having an easy start.
Just take every day as it comes -- good or bad.
Just do what you're supposed to do that day.
That's all you have to do.
My own WLS was complication-free and drama llama free. Not saying there weren't times when I wasn't a little white-knuckled late at night to stay out of the refrigerator. Not saying I was 100% perfect, because I wasn't. But because of the hunger-crazing ghrelin being gone, all my research and self-education and pre-preparation, and my compulsive meal planning and tracking (which taught me sooo much about nutrition), my own WLS trip thus far has been completely doable.
However, I never imagine there's an end to this strip. Just turned on the TV and The Barefoot Contessa (cooking show) is on. She's so cute (weighing at least 240 pounds) and competent and making the most delicious food that I can see with affection how it's not completely awful for everyone who's fat.
On the other hand, I'm not The Barefoot Contessa. And I was fucking miserable at nearly 240 pounds. So there's that. All told, I'm so much happier watching her than being in her shoes.

I am so glad I am not the only one feeling this way! No real problems for me, I keep waiting for something bad to happen.
I seem to be able to hit my Water and Protein with no problems and I can tell pretty easily that I am full now. I have wondered more than once that maybe they didn't really do anything to me except punch holes in me and pump me full of gas.
This morning I weighed 264, down over 20 pounds from my highest weight in the last 2 months and I had my surgery 2 weeks ago Thursday.
I am ready for the dreaded stall and am sure that somewhere along the way I will encounter problems, but after the major problems I have had after operations in the last 18 months, this has been a great experience.

I probably should have put this on the Post-Op side, since I am 10 days post op. So at this point I am struggling to get even 800 calories in.
This is the nutritional info I got from my fitness pal after I entered the recipe:
Calories: 163
Carbs: 12
Fat: 3
Protein: 24
Sodium: 116
Sugar: 4

I am only 10 days post op and luckily have not had any head hunger yet, I figure it is coming, but I will deal with it when it does.
With that being said, I have had to deal with it during the past couple of years. I have been hospitalized 8 times since Dec 2013 with problems dealing with my digestive system and every one required major changes in my diet, from nothing for a couple of weeks, to 1 oz of ice an hour. So even though I have not dealt with it yet, I have in the past.
I decided to tackle it the same way I tackled the mental battle I had when I quit smoking 12 years ago. I knew the physical dependency on nicotine would end in about 7 days, but that didn't take away the desire for a smoke.
I started making latch hook rugs. I knew if I didn't have something to divert my attention then I would either just drive myself into a frenzy wanting my food or cigarette. I tried reading and other diversions like that. But none seemed to hold my attention well enough. I am a gamer as well, and they do work sometimes, but I could still eat while I was gaming. By making the latch hook rugs, it keeps both of my hands busy and keeps my mind occupied as well as I have to count the stitches and things. The other nice thing is I can work on it for as little or as long as I need to.
I know that isn't for everyone, but what I found that works for me is something like that, something that occupies me completely, but not something that I have to work hours and hours at a stretch on.
I guess my caution to everyone dealing with this is to consider all of the ramifications of it. I remember a few times that I would think maybe I can have just one puff off of a cigarette, it wont hurt, but then the next thing I knew, it was just a 1/4 of a smoke, then a 1/2, then a whole one. Luckily I would realize what I was doing before it went further, but I still had to start the battle with the physical addiction all over again. With the food, I didn't have a choice, I couldn't eat stuff, no matter what, so I could not give in, but knowing about the latch hook and how it helped with my smoking I was quickly able to use it for the head hunger as well.
Good luck to everyone and I hope everyone has a wonderful day!

I am only 10 days post op and luckily have not had any head hunger yet, I figure it is coming, but I will deal with it when it does.
With that being said, I have had to deal with it during the past couple of years. I have been hospitalized 8 times since Dec 2013 with problems dealing with my digestive system and every one required major changes in my diet, from nothing for a couple of weeks, to 1 oz of ice an hour. So even though I have not dealt with it yet, I have in the past.
I decided to tackle it the same way I tackled the mental battle I had when I quit smoking 12 years ago. I knew the physical dependency on nicotine would end in about 7 days, but that didn't take away the desire for a smoke.
I started making latch hook rugs. I knew if I didn't have something to divert my attention then I would either just drive myself into a frenzy wanting my food or cigarette. I tried reading and other diversions like that. But none seemed to hold my attention well enough. I am a gamer as well, and they do work sometimes, but I could still eat while I was gaming. By making the latch hook rugs, it keeps both of my hands busy and keeps my mind occupied as well as I have to count the stitches and things. The other nice thing is I can work on it for as little or as long as I need to.
I know that isn't for everyone, but what I found that works for me is something like that, something that occupies me completely, but not something that I have to work hours and hours at a stretch on.
I guess my caution to everyone dealing with this is to consider all of the ramifications of it. I remember a few times that I would think maybe I can have just one puff off of a cigarette, it wont hurt, but then the next thing I knew, it was just a 1/4 of a smoke, then a 1/2, then a whole one. Luckily I would realize what I was doing before it went further, but I still had to start the battle with the physical addiction all over again. With the food, I didn't have a choice, I couldn't eat stuff, no matter what, so I could not give in, but knowing about the latch hook and how it helped with my smoking I was quickly able to use it for the head hunger as well.
Good luck to everyone and I hope everyone has a wonderful day!

I am only 10 days post op and luckily have not had any head hunger yet, I figure it is coming, but I will deal with it when it does.
With that being said, I have had to deal with it during the past couple of years. I have been hospitalized 8 times since Dec 2013 with problems dealing with my digestive system and every one required major changes in my diet, from nothing for a couple of weeks, to 1 oz of ice an hour. So even though I have not dealt with it yet, I have in the past.
I decided to tackle it the same way I tackled the mental battle I had when I quit smoking 12 years ago. I knew the physical dependency on nicotine would end in about 7 days, but that didn't take away the desire for a smoke.
I started making latch hook rugs. I knew if I didn't have something to divert my attention then I would either just drive myself into a frenzy wanting my food or cigarette. I tried reading and other diversions like that. But none seemed to hold my attention well enough. I am a gamer as well, and they do work sometimes, but I could still eat while I was gaming. By making the latch hook rugs, it keeps both of my hands busy and keeps my mind occupied as well as I have to count the stitches and things. The other nice thing is I can work on it for as little or as long as I need to.
I know that isn't for everyone, but what I found that works for me is something like that, something that occupies me completely, but not something that I have to work hours and hours at a stretch on.
I guess my caution to everyone dealing with this is to consider all of the ramifications of it. I remember a few times that I would think maybe I can have just one puff off of a cigarette, it wont hurt, but then the next thing I knew, it was just a 1/4 of a smoke, then a 1/2, then a whole one. Luckily I would realize what I was doing before it went further, but I still had to start the battle with the physical addiction all over again. With the food, I didn't have a choice, I couldn't eat stuff, no matter what, so I could not give in, but knowing about the latch hook and how it helped with my smoking I was quickly able to use it for the head hunger as well.
Good luck to everyone and I hope everyone has a wonderful day!

I am only 10 days post op and luckily have not had any head hunger yet, I figure it is coming, but I will deal with it when it does.
With that being said, I have had to deal with it during the past couple of years. I have been hospitalized 8 times since Dec 2013 with problems dealing with my digestive system and every one required major changes in my diet, from nothing for a couple of weeks, to 1 oz of ice an hour. So even though I have not dealt with it yet, I have in the past.
I decided to tackle it the same way I tackled the mental battle I had when I quit smoking 12 years ago. I knew the physical dependency on nicotine would end in about 7 days, but that didn't take away the desire for a smoke.
I started making latch hook rugs. I knew if I didn't have something to divert my attention then I would either just drive myself into a frenzy wanting my food or cigarette. I tried reading and other diversions like that. But none seemed to hold my attention well enough. I am a gamer as well, and they do work sometimes, but I could still eat while I was gaming. By making the latch hook rugs, it keeps both of my hands busy and keeps my mind occupied as well as I have to count the stitches and things. The other nice thing is I can work on it for as little or as long as I need to.
I know that isn't for everyone, but what I found that works for me is something like that, something that occupies me completely, but not something that I have to work hours and hours at a stretch on.
I guess my caution to everyone dealing with this is to consider all of the ramifications of it. I remember a few times that I would think maybe I can have just one puff off of a cigarette, it wont hurt, but then the next thing I knew, it was just a 1/4 of a smoke, then a 1/2, then a whole one. Luckily I would realize what I was doing before it went further, but I still had to start the battle with the physical addiction all over again. With the food, I didn't have a choice, I couldn't eat stuff, no matter what, so I could not give in, but knowing about the latch hook and how it helped with my smoking I was quickly able to use it for the head hunger as well.
Good luck to everyone and I hope everyone has a wonderful day!

I am only 10 days post op and luckily have not had any head hunger yet, I figure it is coming, but I will deal with it when it does.
With that being said, I have had to deal with it during the past couple of years. I have been hospitalized 8 times since Dec 2013 with problems dealing with my digestive system and every one required major changes in my diet, from nothing for a couple of weeks, to 1 oz of ice an hour. So even though I have not dealt with it yet, I have in the past.
I decided to tackle it the same way I tackled the mental battle I had when I quit smoking 12 years ago. I knew the physical dependency on nicotine would end in about 7 days, but that didn't take away the desire for a smoke.
I started making latch hook rugs. I knew if I didn't have something to divert my attention then I would either just drive myself into a frenzy wanting my food or cigarette. I tried reading and other diversions like that. But none seemed to hold my attention well enough. I am a gamer as well, and they do work sometimes, but I could still eat while I was gaming. By making the latch hook rugs, it keeps both of my hands busy and keeps my mind occupied as well as I have to count the stitches and things. The other nice thing is I can work on it for as little or as long as I need to.
I know that isn't for everyone, but what I found that works for me is something like that, something that occupies me completely, but not something that I have to work hours and hours at a stretch on.
I guess my caution to everyone dealing with this is to consider all of the ramifications of it. I remember a few times that I would think maybe I can have just one puff off of a cigarette, it wont hurt, but then the next thing I knew, it was just a 1/4 of a smoke, then a 1/2, then a whole one. Luckily I would realize what I was doing before it went further, but I still had to start the battle with the physical addiction all over again. With the food, I didn't have a choice, I couldn't eat stuff, no matter what, so I could not give in, but knowing about the latch hook and how it helped with my smoking I was quickly able to use it for the head hunger as well.
Good luck to everyone and I hope everyone has a wonderful day!

I am so happy for you!!! I hope you will continue to do as well with your recovery. Considering all you've been thru in the past, you're golden now! Best of luck.

So I went to the grocery store with my wife yesterday and saw one of my former students. I had him last year but because of my health issues I had not actually seen him since April. I was expecting a, "How are you doing, you look rough" type of conversation.
But no, he says, "Wow, you look great! I saw on FB you had surgery last week but never expected you to look so good. You have lost some weight too, it looks good. I don't know what you are doing but you look fantastic."
That was so refreshing to hear. I realized that my chubby cheeks are not quite as round now. I am one of those odd people that when I start to lose weight it all comes off of my face first. My cat isn't too happy with me either. She used to climb on my stomach and sit on it like a throne. The bulge from the top hernia isn't as big now so she cant sit there. That is from the new binders I have, but it is still nice to be able to look down and not see this huge bulge on the top of my abdomen.
I start the puree stage today for the next 3 weeks so I will let everyone know how that goes.
Small steps can grow into huge successes.
Have a great day everyone

It is a blessing to have a supportive person in the home with me. My wife has been beyond wonderful.
She keeps a journal of what I eat, my BP, my measurements and any other information for me. She told me if I kept it then no one would be able to read it.
She has pre-made Soups, Protein shakes, and yogurt shakes for me and put them pre-measured in the fridge.
I told her that I might like to eat some Protein Bars when I am able. So she got online and researched the store bought ones, she found she could make me some that were much more healthy, so she is going to make them once I can have them.
I start my puree stage on Friday and she is helping me plan the meals and told me that on Thursday, she will pre-make some stuff for me so I can have it starting Friday.
We have been married for 12 years and she has been beside me every step of the way since then. She is my rock, my leaning post, my sounding board.
I know we cant do this for someone else, but I want to get better for her, I want us to be able to enjoy each other again and for her not to have to be my care-giver all of the time. Every time I think this is hard on me, I look at her and see it has not just impacted me, that I need to be strong for both of us, she has carried the load by herself for too long.
I am truly blessed, not just to be able to have had this operation as a part of the healing process, but to have someone like her to go on this journey beside me.

It is a blessing to have a supportive person in the home with me. My wife has been beyond wonderful.
She keeps a journal of what I eat, my BP, my measurements and any other information for me. She told me if I kept it then no one would be able to read it.
She has pre-made Soups, Protein shakes, and yogurt shakes for me and put them pre-measured in the fridge.
I told her that I might like to eat some Protein Bars when I am able. So she got online and researched the store bought ones, she found she could make me some that were much more healthy, so she is going to make them once I can have them.
I start my puree stage on Friday and she is helping me plan the meals and told me that on Thursday, she will pre-make some stuff for me so I can have it starting Friday.
We have been married for 12 years and she has been beside me every step of the way since then. She is my rock, my leaning post, my sounding board.
I know we cant do this for someone else, but I want to get better for her, I want us to be able to enjoy each other again and for her not to have to be my care-giver all of the time. Every time I think this is hard on me, I look at her and see it has not just impacted me, that I need to be strong for both of us, she has carried the load by herself for too long.
I am truly blessed, not just to be able to have had this operation as a part of the healing process, but to have someone like her to go on this journey beside me.

Day 4 Post-Op Update
I decided I would only weigh myself once a week, and decided to do it on Monday. So as of this morning I am at 275, 6 pounds down from my weight on Wednesday before the surgery. I am pleased with that, I know it will fluctuate over the next few months, but it is nice to know that I am starting to lose already.
My pain management is going okay. I am still having to take the pain meds every 4 hours, but I am sure the pain level will decrease over the next few days.
I have been monitoring my BP and it has not been over 130/82 so I actually haven't taken my BP meds since before my surgery. If it gets above 130 I will take the meds again, but considering my BP was 150/100 last week without meds, that is a great improvement.
I am still drinking 3 oz of full liquids every hour and seem to be doing okay. I mix Water, Protein powder w/skim milk, and strained cream of chicken Soup. I am getting my Protein so am pleased with that as well.
Finally, the biggest fear I had was my intestines waking up. I had not had a BM by this morning so I called the clinic and we increased my Mirliax to twice a day. I took a dose around noon and things finally started working!! So my biggest fear has been dealt with and my wife and I are so relieved.
I am really pleased with how things are going and cant thank everyone enough for the thoughts and prayers, not only for me, but that we share with each other. That extra layer of support of understanding, knowing that there is a place we can turn to address fears and concerns and have them shared by people who are dealing with the same things, or who have went through them, that relief, it cant be explained. To have a place to discuss fears and concerns and share our successes, to me anyway, is vital to success of any life changing decision like this.
You, and this place, has made things so much easier for me and my family. I know we will still have our ups and downs, but for the first time in a long time, I feel like I have some control and am not only reacting to things around me.

Your story is moving. I am so glad that you are on the road to recovery. My thoughts and prayers are with you.

Day 4 Post-Op Update
I decided I would only weigh myself once a week, and decided to do it on Monday. So as of this morning I am at 275, 6 pounds down from my weight on Wednesday before the surgery. I am pleased with that, I know it will fluctuate over the next few months, but it is nice to know that I am starting to lose already.
My pain management is going okay. I am still having to take the pain meds every 4 hours, but I am sure the pain level will decrease over the next few days.
I have been monitoring my BP and it has not been over 130/82 so I actually haven't taken my BP meds since before my surgery. If it gets above 130 I will take the meds again, but considering my BP was 150/100 last week without meds, that is a great improvement.
I am still drinking 3 oz of full liquids every hour and seem to be doing okay. I mix Water, Protein powder w/skim milk, and strained cream of chicken Soup. I am getting my Protein so am pleased with that as well.
Finally, the biggest fear I had was my intestines waking up. I had not had a BM by this morning so I called the clinic and we increased my Mirliax to twice a day. I took a dose around noon and things finally started working!! So my biggest fear has been dealt with and my wife and I are so relieved.
I am really pleased with how things are going and cant thank everyone enough for the thoughts and prayers, not only for me, but that we share with each other. That extra layer of support of understanding, knowing that there is a place we can turn to address fears and concerns and have them shared by people who are dealing with the same things, or who have went through them, that relief, it cant be explained. To have a place to discuss fears and concerns and share our successes, to me anyway, is vital to success of any life changing decision like this.
You, and this place, has made things so much easier for me and my family. I know we will still have our ups and downs, but for the first time in a long time, I feel like I have some control and am not only reacting to things around me.

I am home now! Things are going very well. I found out they had to make 2 more incisions in me than they normally make, but it was to remove scar tissue. I am now having 3 ounces of liquids every hour. So far so good. I am sore but it is bearable with the pain medicine.
I checked my weight right before we left the house on Wednesday and it was 283. I think I am going to wait until Monday to check it again and just check it on Mondays after that.
All things considered I am doing okay, thanks for the thoughts and prayers. They really mean a lot to me.

@naturegirl I hope you are doing well. I cant believe by this time tomorrow this first step will be over.
My wife and I made it to Chapel Hill okay, got checked into the hotel and went out to eat. I had some broiled fish, steamed veggies and mashed potatoes. I resisted the urge to have the monster dessert. I am kind of proud of that, Desserts are my big weakness.
I have to be at the hospital at 830 and my surgery is scheduled for 1030. I feel nervous, just because I spent too much time thinking about what could go wrong. I only slept about 3 hours last night, partly from being nervous, partly from wanting this to be over.
All of the other operations I have had over the last 2 years were emergency ones, so I never had a chance to consider all of the possibilities. This seems more difficult for me, but my wife said she prefers this way over my other operations. My normal hospital stay has been 10 days, so I think the 2 day stay with this will hopefully go very quickly.
My pastor is coming to be with my wife during the operation, he plans to get here before my surgery so we can have prayer together. He is pretty awesome, driving 3 hours 1 way to sit with a member of his church. He told me that is what he is supposed to do, but it still means a lot to me. My family lives out of state and I am comforted to know someone is with her.
As soon as I am able to I will post an update...thanks for all of the support.
Tomorrow is the first day of the rest of my life, with the new me....
Jesse

Hello,
I just got home from my evaluation appointment today and am now waiting to hear back about my pre-op. It was the first time in a long time that I didn't feel like a freak after leaving the doctors office. I am scared and nervous, but I know this is something I must do.
My journey down this road started in 1995. That is when I got my first hernia. It was small and appeared 6 months after I had my gall bladder removed. I didn't even know what it was but it hurt very badly and when I went to the ER they rushed me in to operate on it. I thought that was the end of it, little did I know it was only the beginning. 6 months later I had to have another emergency surgery to repair a hernia, 18 months later, another and 2 years after that I had my 4th hernia repair surgery when they removed my belly button!. I was able to make it almost 3 years before my 5th operation. Then 2 months after that I fell and broke my foot which put me in a wheel chair for 6 months and at that point, my minor dealings with my weight became a major problem as I went from 185 pounds to 270.
So I knew at that point I was going to have some major problems, my doctor said my belly looked like Swiss cheese and that any mesh they put in was just going to tear another hole. I just started to live with it and accept that I would have hernias. In the meantime I moved to NC and met another doctor who said he could fix me. So 2 operations later (7 hernia in total) I had 3 large hernias, weighed 290 pounds and had given upon getting them fixed or every being able to lose this extra weight. I accepted that I was beyond fixing and would just learn to live with this.
In December 2013 I had another major issue to deal with as I was admitted for emergency surgery to deal with a blocked intestine. I was in a week, home a week and readmitted for complications. I actually traveled out of the country in February and thought once again this was behind me. But on June 21 2014, I was once again rushed to the hospital and admitted for emergency surgery for a small bowel obstruction. I got home the day before my 50th birthday, was home a week, and readmitted with a severe infection and major complications. After a 2 and a half week stay I was allowed to go home. My 3rd time dealing with this, in February 2014, was enough, my 3rd bowel obstruction surgery in 14 months. The doctor who had done these last 3 operations told me that my abdomen was "complicated" and beyond the ability of my local hospital to deal with so he referred me to UNC to be checked by a hernia specialist there.
My wife and I had talked about me getting some type of operation to help with my weight, but after 11 operations on my belly in 20 years I figured no one would even consider the idea. But the doctor who saw me told me that I needed to lose at least 50 pounds before he could attempt to fix my hernias and suggested I get the sleeve surgery. Then I started researching, and praying and talking to my wife and my daughter and my parents, wanting to make the decision that would end this cycle and give me my life back.
I am tired, I am tired of the endless cycle of hospital stays, I am tired of feeling this way, I am tired of seeing the stress I am putting my family under, I am tired of being scared, I am tired of looking this way.
I want my life to be good again, I know that there is a chance that even if I lose the weight the hernia doctor will tell me there is nothing he can do. But I will have a better chance of getting my weight under control and at least be able to wear binders that fit to hold my hernias in.
So now I wait, they told me it will take about 1-2 weeks for my insurance to approve everything and they will get me back in to meet the surgeon and complete my pre-op and I should have the operation about a week after that. For the first time in about 10 years I feel like I am in control again, I feel like this is going to work, I feel positive that this will give me control of my life again.
I am ready, but I am scared. I guess some people would think that I have had enough operations that they should be 2nd nature to me and I guess that is part of the reason I am scared, I have had a total of 15 operations in the last 22 years. I know how hard they are and I know how bad it can get. But even knowing that, I know this is something I have to do.
So I start on this journey with my family, it is not only a change for me, but for them as well. I am blessed to have a very supportive family who is going to be with me every step of the way.
But I appreciate your support as well, the best advice is from people who have been down the path I am embarking on and I thank you in advance for any advice and feedback I get.
Sorry for such a long post, but this is the first time I have talked about all of this in quite a while.
Thanks

Hello,
I just got home from my evaluation appointment today and am now waiting to hear back about my pre-op. It was the first time in a long time that I didn't feel like a freak after leaving the doctors office. I am scared and nervous, but I know this is something I must do.
My journey down this road started in 1995. That is when I got my first hernia. It was small and appeared 6 months after I had my gall bladder removed. I didn't even know what it was but it hurt very badly and when I went to the ER they rushed me in to operate on it. I thought that was the end of it, little did I know it was only the beginning. 6 months later I had to have another emergency surgery to repair a hernia, 18 months later, another and 2 years after that I had my 4th hernia repair surgery when they removed my belly button!. I was able to make it almost 3 years before my 5th operation. Then 2 months after that I fell and broke my foot which put me in a wheel chair for 6 months and at that point, my minor dealings with my weight became a major problem as I went from 185 pounds to 270.
So I knew at that point I was going to have some major problems, my doctor said my belly looked like Swiss cheese and that any mesh they put in was just going to tear another hole. I just started to live with it and accept that I would have hernias. In the meantime I moved to NC and met another doctor who said he could fix me. So 2 operations later (7 hernia in total) I had 3 large hernias, weighed 290 pounds and had given upon getting them fixed or every being able to lose this extra weight. I accepted that I was beyond fixing and would just learn to live with this.
In December 2013 I had another major issue to deal with as I was admitted for emergency surgery to deal with a blocked intestine. I was in a week, home a week and readmitted for complications. I actually traveled out of the country in February and thought once again this was behind me. But on June 21 2014, I was once again rushed to the hospital and admitted for emergency surgery for a small bowel obstruction. I got home the day before my 50th birthday, was home a week, and readmitted with a severe infection and major complications. After a 2 and a half week stay I was allowed to go home. My 3rd time dealing with this, in February 2014, was enough, my 3rd bowel obstruction surgery in 14 months. The doctor who had done these last 3 operations told me that my abdomen was "complicated" and beyond the ability of my local hospital to deal with so he referred me to UNC to be checked by a hernia specialist there.
My wife and I had talked about me getting some type of operation to help with my weight, but after 11 operations on my belly in 20 years I figured no one would even consider the idea. But the doctor who saw me told me that I needed to lose at least 50 pounds before he could attempt to fix my hernias and suggested I get the sleeve surgery. Then I started researching, and praying and talking to my wife and my daughter and my parents, wanting to make the decision that would end this cycle and give me my life back.
I am tired, I am tired of the endless cycle of hospital stays, I am tired of feeling this way, I am tired of seeing the stress I am putting my family under, I am tired of being scared, I am tired of looking this way.
I want my life to be good again, I know that there is a chance that even if I lose the weight the hernia doctor will tell me there is nothing he can do. But I will have a better chance of getting my weight under control and at least be able to wear binders that fit to hold my hernias in.
So now I wait, they told me it will take about 1-2 weeks for my insurance to approve everything and they will get me back in to meet the surgeon and complete my pre-op and I should have the operation about a week after that. For the first time in about 10 years I feel like I am in control again, I feel like this is going to work, I feel positive that this will give me control of my life again.
I am ready, but I am scared. I guess some people would think that I have had enough operations that they should be 2nd nature to me and I guess that is part of the reason I am scared, I have had a total of 15 operations in the last 22 years. I know how hard they are and I know how bad it can get. But even knowing that, I know this is something I have to do.
So I start on this journey with my family, it is not only a change for me, but for them as well. I am blessed to have a very supportive family who is going to be with me every step of the way.
But I appreciate your support as well, the best advice is from people who have been down the path I am embarking on and I thank you in advance for any advice and feedback I get.
Sorry for such a long post, but this is the first time I have talked about all of this in quite a while.
Thanks