her1981

@@Margie122 My coworkers don't know I've had surgery. Only my boss knows. I guess the difference is shocking, but certainly I'm not the first person they've known to ever lose weight.

@@gpmed Exactly! What did you think I looked like before?! (not that I care!)

@@VSGAnn2014 All I can do is laugh

Is that a new dress or an old dress that you’re fitting back into? (why does it matter?)

How much weight have you lost?! And then she starts guessing!!! (NOYB)

How much more are you trying to lose cuz you look really good now? (Still NOYB)

You look so much younger since you've lost weight. (gee, thanks)

I bet your feet don't hurt as much. (how would you know they hurt in the first place? RUDE!)

What are you eating to lose weight? (this didn't bother me)

I noticed at our luncheon last week that you only ate the tops off the pizza. (food police?)

All this was asked/said to me at work this morning. I don't even talk to these people that much. Geez!!!! I have to rant at least once a week, LOL!

Just tell me I look good and keep it moving. Happy Monday!

It's normal. Veggies are made up of mostly Water.

@@katesuccess I could rant on and on. It's definitely one of my strong suits, LOL!

I truly feel like I'm living for the first time in a long time. I no longer feel limited by my weight - even though I still have a lot to lose. I feel comfortable in my body and no longer hide. It's a wonderful feeling. I love that I've actually been able to inspire/motivate a couple close friends to seek wls, but I am always so amazed that people are still frightened of it.

I turn these comments into a joke with responses like what would you like me to leave you in my will? Or well I guess my weight struggle will be over quicker than I had planned.... I don't pass judgement on what others do as everyone has to do what's best for them

Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App

Ha! I'm going to use these!

I get that one about people dying from weight loss surgery, odd how the whole world seems to know someone who died from it.

Sent from my iPhone using the BariatricPal App

Right, but what about the millions of people who survived and are doing well! I bet the reason is because many of us keep it secret due to people's ignorance, so they probably know plenty of people who've had it, but don't know they've had it.

@@toastedink I catch the most flack from people with weight problems in weight loss support groups! It's THE MOST frustrating and baffling thing!

OK, @@her1981 ... I gotta hear about this.

Are these weight loss support groups online or in-real-life ,and are they limited to WLS patients or "everybody who's trying to lose weight"?

It's groups online with everyone trying to lose weight; however, I have gotten negative feedback from people I know in real life "My aunt died when she got a gastric bypass"- 16 years ago! It may not have been laproscopic, she may have already been in poor health, maybe she didn't go to a bariatric center of excellence etc.... Just the suggestion that she consider a sleeve.... meanwhile she has been doing weight watchers for the last 10 years suffering from hbp, Type 2 diabetes, and had a stroke at 35. SMH!

@@toastedink I catch the most flack from people with weight problems in weight loss support groups! It's THE MOST frustrating and baffling thing!

I just get sick of debating with people why it's a viable solution.

I don't understand why people get so "upset" whenever wls is mentioned/offered as a tool to aid in weight loss. "Oh, you don't need that. You just need to....." Or once you mention that you've had wls, you are no longer a credible support to people losing the "natural" way.

Overall, I find that people are generally misinformed about the different procedures and supposedly "everyone" they know who had the surgery has either gained all the weight back or died...Everyone is suddenly an expert on the ills of weight loss surgery. Don't they realize that there are other circumstances that could have led to their deaths? Why blame WLS?

If it's not what you would do, fine; but why not be supportive if a person decides it's right for them? I think it's interesting that when a person has cancer, no one shames them for getting chemo or radiation. This is exactly why I don't tell everyone. It's like you have the freaking plague.

So annoying! Rant over....

I have to slightly agree that they rip us off for plus sizes. I'll take Old Navy for example because they sell EVERYTHING.

The misses xxl might cost $20, but the plus 1x or 2x costs $40... same amount of material in my humble opinion. And in the mens, there is NO difference in price between the regular and the big and tall.

I so appreciate the encouragement and support. No one I know seems to understand these burdens.

@@gowalking I feel totally betrayed by my body. I'm trying to forgive myself for the abuse.

I don't even know where to begin. Mentally, I am drained...

I had been trying to lose weight for the last 15 years or so, with many, many, too many ups and downs; and in the process gained over 100 pounds. Now in the past year, I have lost almost 150 pounds. As I sit here 2 pounds away from 150 pounds lost, I am amazed (see ashamed, dumbfounded, embarrassed) that even with that much of a loss I have so much more to lose. I don't even know how to feel about it. How did this happen? How was I so far gone? I'd been 300+ since I was 17. This is just mind-boggling.

During all the testing for the sleeve, a bunch of health issues were uncovered. Things that I feel like should've been found or addressed over the years as I've had other ailments and such that have required testing, but I digress.

Anyway, after the sleeve was performed, I was notified of a malignant tumor on my stomach that was cut away with the sleeve,and a humongous staghorn kidney stone that had taken up residence in my left kidney. I have to follow up with an oncologist to make sure all is clear, and I've recently had 2 surgeries to get rid of the kidney stone. I feel like the sleeve has saved my life, truly, but my God this journey has shown me how bad off I really was (am?). I'm 34 and there were things happening in my body that don't typically affect people until later in life. (I've got a couple other issues not addressed in this post...) I had literally fallen apart! I'm grateful that none of this is fatal and the doctors are "rebuilding" me piece by piece.

So as I'm trying to define what is healthy for me weight-wise, I have all these doctors in my head and it is literally driving me crazy. Bariatric surgeon gave me a goal, pcp has another goal, urologist has a goal... Meanwhile, I have tons of dietary restrictions due to the different health issues. I'm overwhelmed mentally and emotionally. This process has become far more than I bargained for. I'm grateful, for sure, but this journey is...just that. A true journey.

Anyway, I guess this post is long enough. I just needed a place to put my feelings. :-)

I still weigh more than most people starting weights. At 293 pounds, there is nothing small or skinny about me. It's just freaking ridiculous.

I'm hoping people adjust sooner rather than later. I think I'm struggling to accept the changes myself as I have never experienced life as an adult under 300 pounds. I do feel like a stranger in my body from time to time. I think people's comments about are giving me anxiety or making me insecure. This truly is a mental process.

@@Kindle Thank you. :-)

@@dhrguru I thought about that. How ridiculous! Especially after being over 300 pounds for my ENTIRE adult life!

@@madeline121 If you think that's bad, no one (except my immediate family) said ANYTHING to me until I lost 100!!!!

If another person tells me I don't need to lose anymore weight... How can I still be almost 300 pounds and NOT look like I need to lose more weight?????????????? People and their perceptions.

"How much more weight are you going to lose???"

"You're going to disappear" (FAT chance of that happening)

"I don't think you need to lose anymore weight. You look great!"

Thanks for your concern. It's nice and all, but I'm not done.

RANT OVER....

@@SkinnyDown

When you are morbidly obese for a long time, it changes your body. Your bones become much denser and you have more muscle mass. Your doctor is probably aware of this and knows that you don't have to go that low in weight to have a low body fat percentage.

My bone density is at the top of the charts. Because of that I will always weight more than a person that has been a normal weight their whole life and weighs the same as what I weight at the time. My muscle mass exceed exceed my fat mass even when I still had a high BMI after losing weight after surgery (I am almost due to have it tested again). The ratio of muscle I have to fat is not reflected on any BMI or fat percentage chart. It would only be known by having a body scan which is what I had. I wear a 14 in juniors even though I am still very heavy in weight but I am pretty compact in how I look (for my weight, I still have a long way to go). Carrying around an extra 200 lbs for 20 years changed my body forever, and it has for most people that have been very obese for a very long time.

@@SkinnyDown

When you are morbidly obese for a long time, it changes your body. Your bones become much denser and you have more muscle mass. Your doctor is probably aware of this and knows that you don't have to go that low in weight to have a low body fat percentage.

My bone density is at the top of the charts. Because of that I will always weight more than a person that has been a normal weight their whole life and weighs the same as what I weight at the time. My muscle mass exceed exceed my fat mass even when I still had a high BMI after losing weight after surgery (I am almost due to have it tested again). The ratio of muscle I have to fat is not reflected on any BMI or fat percentage chart. It would only be known by having a body scan which is what I had. I wear a 14 in juniors even though I am still very heavy in weight but I am pretty compact in how I look (for my weight, I still have a long way to go). Carrying around an extra 200 lbs for 20 years changed my body forever, and it has for most people that have been very obese for a very long time.

You are so right. I had them re-check me at my last visit and I still have a goal weight of over 200 pounds based on my % of body fat, muscle mass, and bone density. Of the 140 pounds I've lost, only 20 was muscle. So now I'm left wondering if I'll be over 200 pounds and still healthy. Interestingly, I went to see a doctor on Friday (not my bariatric surgeon) and he asked if I was planning to lose anymore weight. I said "yes, I'm still fat" and he waved me off saying I was REALLY healthy. I fully intend to get to 230ish, but maybe that's it for me??? Only time will tell.

Yes! There's something about cheetos! I have fallen "victim" to them a couple times, lol!

They used the machine that measures body fat, muscle, bone, and Water. According to that, my fat free weight was 180, so I could weigh up to 230 and have a healthy percentage of body fat.

Yeah when I saw the surgeon he said I didn't have a pre op goal except I can't gain more than 2% during the program. For me thats 7 pounds. I am a little worried about that because I can flux between 10 pounds according to my doctors scale. He doesn't have a digital one and has told me they are not the best at measuring larger people. I am hoping they go by the nuts scale because hers is a digital one that also does the body fat. I have only seen the nut once and she didn't give me any guidelines on how much to eat pre op. I am confused how I am on a medically monitored weight loss program with no guidelines.

I did low carb to drop weight before the surgery. It's pretty effective. Do you have and anticipated surgery date?