Smye

@@lachellove, @@SassyNanny, thank you! Updates galore: http://gaywifeconfusinglife.blogspot.com/2016/06/the-set-up.html

Oh what the heck... let's Celebrate this new phase in my life with, what else, BACON!

Oh, and while I'm here. pizza Pinwheels everybody!

Selling the farm - a SERIOUS mix of dread and hope... Anyway, the full update is here: http://bit.do/sellthefarm

Selling the farm, but don't worry, I'll keep writing delicious bariatric friendly foods. Also... I keep hearing rumors of a cookbook coming soon... Anyway, the full update is here: http://bit.do/farmsale

And a-one: http://gaywifeconfusinglife.blogspot.com/2016/04/a-change-is-gonna-come.html And a-two: http://gaywifeconfusinglife.blogspot.com/2016/04/maps-20.html

@@SassyNanny, nope: https://genesight.com/

@@SassyNanny - I'm so thankful you weren't seriously hurt, that's terrifying. Mine appears to be less about a subconscious need to be mad or anything, and more an (apparently) typical PTSD symptom as someone who experienced significant childhood trauma and is now experiencing re-abandonment. According to my psych it 'happens all the time.' Not exactly comforting. We also just sent a genetic sample to an org that will run a screen for my compatibility with various psycho-tropic meds, grouping them into 'red, yellow, and green' categories so I can get something onboard to help with the anxiety/depression.

@@lachellove - thanks. It's a bit of a headtrip, to be sure, but I agree, I think it's in everyone's best interest. @@SassyNanny - I thought it had stopped, then I asked Mrs. Smye and nope, every night, roughly at 2 am, she hears me mumbling and pacing in my room, there's a loud crash every few nights. I woke up this morning with my jeans on. But I've absolutely zero recollection of any of it. Bizarre.

@@lachellove, thanks Lachelle. Quick update: Budget submitted, so I should have a more thorough update sometime tomorrow. In short: The Cartographer and I are still getting on as friends, so far so good? The Actress ROCKS, is currently committed to at least 2 years without a romance and it's lovely to have another friend in my life. On Sunday my friend The Gourmand and I will be making hundreds of sushi (maki, nigiri, gunkan, and sashimi) in a dry run of our work for AllRecipes. Should be a great time! Okay, nevermind, this is the longform update: This last week we had a real estate agent friend out to advise us on how to go about converting the house to a duplex by adding a central interior wall (cost estimate, impact on resale, etc etc). Long story short, her advice was DO NOT DO IT! We've got (apparently) somewhere between $200k and $250k in equity in the house (hooray for buying in late 2011 and it being an election year approaching summer) and, in her work over the last 30 years, she's helped a number of clients (which we are not) through similar divorces (one spouse realizes they are gay and it's amicable) and only once has living on the same property survived beyond the acquisition of a new partner. Additionally, the preschools and elementary schools that provide appropriate services for Little Smye are all out of the district we live in now. Her advice is: Sell the house this summer, use the profits to 1) give Mrs. Smye a large chunk of $ to survive on while she sets up her practice/downpayment on a small house for her/Little Smye 2) give myself a smaller chunk (only $80k) to completely zero out all student loans 3) reduce myself spousal support by way of the larger share of profits going to Mrs. Smye at the outset 4) Provide myself a larger portion of his income to be able to rent for a short while near to work and build a stockpile to buy again when the market next drops 5) provide Little Smye a stable, single move, landing in a near-forever home. It's utterly heartbreaking, but admittedly seems to be the most reasonable solution. I don't want to give up my home, but I can't afford to support my own mortgage, a household for Mrs. Smye once she moves out, AND make my student loan payments. And if Mrs. Smye is going to move westward towards better schools for Little Smye , I want to be near to them. My biggest anxiety (other than losing my wife [oh wait, that's already done] and not living with my son most of the time [in his best interest based on the careers of his parents]) is the financial aspect of all of this. Mrs. Smye took a low paying job and I acquired $80k in student loans in order to maximize our family's long-term earning potential, but with the divorce it leaves us both effectively screwed... except that we've got such equity in the house that we can effectively solve both problems (giving her enough of a cushion to live off of until she finishes her licensure and eliminating all of my student debt). We've not made any decisions at this point, but it's looking like we'll likely aim for a deal to be reached mid-end of spring with closing in early July (I have July off, which would allow for crashing on Mrs. Smye's couch while I hunt for a new home once we have her securely placed). We'll also likely stay married until after the house is sold as there are no capital gains taxes on up to $500k if we're married, but $250k if we're divorced. We'll then see about doing one of those 'self-guided divorce' deals for $800 rather than the $8-20k attorney-guided divorces.

@@woo woo - makes it amazing. To be more precise: The interior paste under the rind is creamy, clean and soft with tangy taste. The rind itself is the mildest sweetness of blue with the piquant flavor of a gorgonzola, but without the bitter ammonia oft associated with the ammonia. It's got that immediate blue tang, but without the blue-aftertaste, yielding to the grassy YUM of a chevre aftertaste. It's really quite delightful. Even folks who HATE the blue in my life tend to like it.

Welcome and congratulations!

I make a lot of my own cheese and sample just about anything I can get ahold of... Hands down my favorites are tallegio, as well as a blue-ripened chevre. If you don't want to order the blue log from a specialty dealer, find a log of standard chevre (goat cheese) and let me know and I can send you a 'how-to'... it's actually a piece of cake to make.

@@lachellove, thank you for checking in. That small gesture of support means the world. In brief - yes I am well. The Cartographer and I continue to be in contact with strict parameters, the Actress and I are spending time together as friends and I am on something of a dating hiatus. I'll be posting a more thorough update once I get this budget submitted to the board - yay for having a real job alongside everything else

@@Valentina - you have no idea how nice that would be. If you'd like to drive cross country and hit me over the head - i mean, if that actually works and everything reset - please feel free! And thank you.