chichigirl

Thanks everyone, I appreciate the information. I talked to the nurse at the docs office today and she thinks I have severly irritated my stomach and the stoma sight, location of the band. She said that if those areas are inflammed, that could explain why it is so difficult for me to eat anything solid. I appreciate all of the helpful advise, like trying more hot liquids. I did have some of the fill removed the day after the initial fill .5cc's taken out. Each day seems to be getting better, but I'm still having trouble swallowing solids or even mushies. I have an appoinment now for an upper GI next week, so hopefully, this will answer all of my questions. I hope there is nothing seriously wrong with the band, if I loose the band I will be forced into RNY and I really have an issue with that. Thank you all for your help, it is truly appreciated. Cindy

Oh Estella, I can't tell you how very sorry I am that this has happened to you and your Mom, but once again God and His Angels were watching over her. I know that it's scary to look back at what might have been, believe me I do, but now that she is doing better and getting the proper treatment, you can relax. I'm sure she wishes you were closer, but knows and understands why you are not. You and your Mom are very obviously very blessed, for you not only have such a strong love for one another, but He is watching over all of you. And not to forget the army of people here at lb that are praying for you both as well!!! (((((HUGS)))))) Cindy

:cross-eye Ebonysilk, I saw your postings on another thread about the fill being too tight. I know this must be extremely freaky and scary to read about these new and strange things, but don't let it deter you from what you want. If you look at that thread now, you will see that I too, am having a really bad fill experience this week. But even though things were so bad for me, when I went back to the doc he wanted to know if I wanted all of the fill taken out and I told him absolutely not, I still want restriction, just not quite as much as was there at the moment, I'd like to breath please!! Anyway, after almost 4 years, this is the first time this has happened, so I don't think it is all that common, just get to know your body and you will be able to at least some extent know what it is asking for. I too am a diabetic and I am truly sorry to hear that you are having such a difficult time for this preop process. Every doctor is different and I know that sometimes they don't pay attention to patients as individuals and therefore require special needs, they just treat us like everyone is the same. Call and bug the doctor if you need to give him a gentle reminder, don't be afraid of him thinking you are a pain, let him know you concerns are genuine and he will respect you for that. Good luck on Monday, you will be in my thoughts and prayers that you have the easiest surgery ever and the quickest of recoveries. God Bless. Cindy

:cross-eye There must be a full moon or something. I've been banded now for almost 4 years and never, ever have I had too tight a fill, that is until this past Tuesday. The last fill I had was a little over 6 weeks ago and he put in 2cc. It was perfect, I mean it really was the best fill I had ever had and I did well. But it doesn't take long before I loosen up and need another fill, so I called and had the appointment on Tuesday. He checked to see how much was still there and it was down to 1.5cc, so it wasn't my imagination that I was much less restricted. Anyway he put in the 2cc and again it seemed a little tight, but I thought nothing of it. When I got home later, I had not eaten anything yet, so I poured myself some ice tea. Man, I could not believe the awful pain. And that was followed by vomitting, something I never do, ever. So I slowed down, drank only sips of room temperature Water (UGH) and decided to drink something warm. So I made myself a cup of hot broth and took very tiny sips at very long intervals, three or four sips and I was puking again. Well this went on all night, no sleep, called the doc at 9:00 on the nose and they told me he wouldn't be in until the afternoon. I said fine, get me in, they argued, of course, they he was booked, and I simply told them I didn't care, I was coming in with or without an appointment, it was their choice. So they finally gave me a 1:15 appointment, went in had .5cc removed, thought I would be fine, came home and I don't know what's going on, but I am still having trouble, liquids are okay if slooooooow and small sips. I was able to sleep last night and this afternoon I was able to take my heart meds finally, so I guess it's getting better. Hope you with a toooo tight band do as well, god I hope this hasn't caused a slippage, I go in a month for an upper GI, so we'll see. Thanks all of you for being there and for being so supportive, it's such an unbelievable blessing to have people who understand. Cindy

That is such wonderful news, I am truly happy for you and your family, especially your Mom. Thanks for letting us know and remember we are always here for you and your family should you ever need us. Thank you Lord for answering all of our prayers once again!!!! Cindy

Of course this whole process is for life, and you can't live if you don't take care of yourself. Being morbidly obese and being a smoker caused me a heart attack, quadruple bypass, cancer of the uterus, hysterectomy, and my gall bladder need to be removed. And those are just the biggies, I also have diabetes, sleep apnea, difficulty breathing, and constant joint pain. The big things happened to me when I was only 38 years old. Being 49 now, I am really pushing my luck for seeing anything much past 50. Yeah, I am glad this is for the rest of my life and I hope to live to a ripe old age. Cindy

Hi Sweetie, I was wondering what had happened. I'm so terribly sorry to hear that it is this serious and of course my prayers and good thoughts go out to you and your whole family. My Mom had a similar experience last year, but thank God, the tumor was benign. She got over that and another one showed up this year, and again it was benign. Remember there is always hope. Keep the faith and know we are all here for you. Cindy

I can't believe you named her PITA (Pain in the Ass). A long time ago I had a ferret that I named PITA which stood for exactly the same thing!!! That's so funny, no one I have ever talked to had heard of such a thing. But true to his name he was a royal pain that chased everyone around trying to bite their toes, but the final straw was when he took my 12 week old himalayn kitten and almost took her eye out. Luckily we found a teenager working at a pet store that really wanted him, so we turned him over. The kitten ended up being okay and several hundreds of dollars later at the vets we were able to save her eye. So alls well that ends well. Cindy

Count me in too!!! I love challenges, it brings out the competitive side of me and I have great fun with it. I may have a little trouble getting the pictures posted, but I will work at it and get them in on time. Thanks for the opportunity. Cindy

What a little darling!!! I'm so glad he has a new home, one that really wants him. Don't even get me started on the #$#%%$ that just threw him out the car window. If you no long want an animal, drop them off at a shelter, so it takes a few minutes out of you life, you can spare it. Better than taking a chance on hurting or worse yet, killing the poor things. I am such an animal lover, I even rescue the lizards that sneak inside from my patio so the cats don't get them and eat them. Once, when I was going to the mall with a friend, I looked up and there was there was this poor little lizard just hanging onto my windshield wiper for dear life. I was about to get onto the expressway, but decided to take a short detour down a side street where I pulled over and gentle let him loose in an open field. My friend thought I was crazy, but I didn't care, I wasn't goint to have his death on my head. Well, aren't you glad I decided to responsed to your post. Give the kitty a tickle on the nose for me. Cindy

Jack, you are so great at expressing just the right sentiments when needed and you always put smiles on everyones face. Thanks Connorsmom, Beating yourself up is part of the old behavior that we are all working on. Like others have pointed out to you, 42lbs is no small feat. How would you feel if you had gained 42lbs instead? Suicidal? Be kinder to yourself and be greatful for the things you can do a little easier now without that 42lb burden you were dragging around? Doctor's feel that yelling or being stern is the only way to make us listen. I know mine makes me feel like a child and I'm at least 20 years older than he is. Once I remind myself of that, I just giggle at myself and know that he better say something to get me moving in the right direction, that's what he's being paid for. Good luck, Cindy

When I first started this journey I was at my all time highest weight of 367 and I did just fine through the surgery and in a little over a year I lost over 125lbs! I really didn't start exercising seriously and then hit a few bumps in the road, had the band deflated and gained back alot of weight, but please realize this was my choice. I was being really foolish and finally came back to my senses and started this time at 349 when I got a fill again, it's been six weeks and I have lost over 33lbs and that's without exercise. I have a heart condition and diabetes so it's very difficult for me to do much. I need to loose a little more weight before I start that. Hope this helps ease some of your fears. As you can see, many of us were way up there on the scale and have managed to do great with the band. I love it, it allowed me to mess up and come right back to correcting my poor judgement. Best wishes and Good luck!! Cindy

I am feeling really, really down right now. I have anxiety churning from the very bottom of my stomach and of course the only thing I know to do is feed it. It's like it's an unsatiable entity that will not be denied it's pleasure no matter what I do. I have tried every distraction know to man, yet it is always much louder and far more persistant than I could ever be and it always wins. In every other way of my life I feel that I am a strong, confident, intelligent woman with many positive qualities and yet this one burden that has been with me most of my life I cannot overcome. What's wrong with me??? I have a psychiatrist, therapist and my best friend is a social worker. Yet even they haven't been able to help me with this problem. They have taught many coping mechanisms, and generally they work well, for every other problem, but not this one. Like so many of you, nighttime is my most difficult time and I really don't understand why. I take medication for my depression and anxiety disorder and I always keep my appointments with all of my doctors. In that respect I am the proverable goody two shoes. I feel that I honestly have tried everything short of electro shock therapy. Tonight I am frightened by my feelings. When they get this bad I really go into self destruct mode. I binge like there were no tomorrow and have even been known to make myself physically ill from eating junk. I had a fill almost 6 weeks ago and have lost 22 lbs. I am not happy with that amount and feel like a failure and am wondering what's the use. I go Tuesday for another fill, but am ashamed at how little I have lost. Is there any hope for me???? Cindy

Thank you, each and every one of you for your generous support and time. It really helps to know that there are such caring and compassionate people there for me when I need a should to cry on. You are all my angels watching over me, so there is something very special in my life, all of you. How can I fail with your support? I read and reread these messages for constant strength, so thanking you from the bottom of my heart for being their for me. We are familiar strangers traveling the same path, so please know that I too will be there for any of you in your time of need. God Bless each and every one of us!!!! I love you all, I really do and thanks again. Cindy

Yeah, I think all of the docs require it. I got so made about it that I even told the doc, look if I could loose the weight on my own, I wouldn't need the @$%# surgery!! But I did it and was fine. I allowed myself to eat scramblers, they're an egg substitute like eggbeaters, but I like the way they taste better. They're solid protien with 0 fat and they really helped curb the hunger. Alot of other people add things to their protien powder drinks, like bananas, strawberries, just about any kind of fruit you would find palatable with what you are drinking. I would think that since this is pre-surgery, as long as you eat mild non fat foods with a high Protein levels, you would be okay. Like applesauce, cottage cheese. I know it's not our usual preferred food, but it actually helps you to start adapting to eating properly after the surgery. Hope this helps. Good luck, Oh, I would think you could also eat sugar free popsicles, no fat in those and I think the cold numbs the stomach a bit so you are not so hungry and they're actually pretty good. Take care, Let us know how you are doing.

The most painful part of the surgery for me, was where the doctor had to attach the port to a muscle in the abdominal area. Now I know every one is different, just as every doctor do things different, but all in all in this not considered a seriously painful surgery, more of a discomfort and even that doesn't last too long. I myself actually only felt pain when I had to stand up or sit back down, because I was using that muscle, but if I were just sitting in a chair or laying in bed, I had no pain at all. It's normal to be frightened and that's why it's good to come to the boards for support. Keep us posted on your progress and I wish and pray for a very speedy and painfree recovery for you and a successful journey on you weight loss adventure. I personally think you will eventually feel like the rest of us and be glad you have made this decision, I know I am. Take care, Cindy

Way to go!!!! That's a great thing to hear about, so inspirational for the rest of us and absolutely wonderful for you!!!!! Nothing like great news like yours to give us all a lift and boy is this great news. I wish you continued success in all that you do!!!!! Cindy

:laugh :laugh wow!!!!! THANKS FOR SUCH A TRULY INSPIRATIONAL SET OF PICTURES!!!! YOU LOOK ABSOLUTELY FABULOUS!!!! CINDY

Okay, this sounds like some of the others, but I swear it really happened. A while back when I was still married, we lived in Miami, Florida. My husband was working for a large firm and they called him out of town to do a job up in Jacksonville. I hated that he had to go and they said it would be at least two weeks for him to be up there. At that time I was the biggest baby that ever was, I was terrified of sleeping in the dark, let alone in an empty house. I had asked a girl friend to stay over, but she wouldn't, she thought I was just being silly. I mean so what if I was 32 years old, I can be scared. Anyway, because the house did not have central air conditioning there were window units in all of the rooms. At night we would turn the one in the living room off and just turn on the one in the bedroom and close the door. So here I am, finally going to bed at around 2 or 3 AM in my dark bedroom with the door closed. But I was so tired and was just falling asleep when all of a sudden BANG - BANG- BANG, there was someone outside banging on the side bedroom window. I though I would have a heart attack. I grabbed my phone and called my girlfriend, who was actually a little ticked with me waking her up. She said, "Why are you calling me, call the cops," so I hung up and did just that. The dispatcher told me they were sending someone right away and for me to stay on the phone with her. She let me know when the police were at my address and let me know that they were walking around the house, but for me to stay where I was. I could here them walking around and I saw the flashlights. I was breathing so hard, you would have thought I was an obscene caller! Well after a few minutes the dispatcher told me to go to the front door, the officers were out there and needed to talk to me. I was really petrified, but did as she told me. I cracked the door just slightly to make sure that it was really the police. They called out my name and told me to open the door wider, so I did, which at that point they put their flashlights in the face of this man they had in handcuffs. They wanted to know if I recognized him, I took a look and of course it was my stupid husband. He made me so mad that at first I told the police officers that I had never seen him before in my life! Boy that scared the crap out him!!!! Finally I just started yelling at him about why didn't he let me know he was coming home and he just said he wanted to surprise me. I said well I guess we both got surprised. So the officers took off the handcuffs and when he came inside, I really let him have it. I was still shaking from the whole thing. I get shakey just thinking about, that was my biggest fright ever. Cindy

Why is it that everyone thinks of WLS as the easy way out??? I mean, when people try to quit smoking, does anyone give them a hard time if they try many of the products on the market designed to make it easier for you to be more successful? I wonder how many of these people have even undergone surgery. I can tell you this, I had this done a little over three years ago, and like it is for everyone, it is an elective surgery. However, the eight surgeries I went through prior this one were not. It was one of the most difficult decisions I had ever made, talk about being sick of having surgery and then go through the recovery process, who needs it, but eventually I realized I did. I have lost a lot of weight with this tool and I have gained it all back, by my own choice. I'm back to using the tool and truly hope to beat my demons this time and finally reach my goal before it kills me altogether. Well, now that I got that off my chest, just realize, unless we have been through it, it is difficult for any of us to relate to difficulties other people have, even loved ones. What may seem simple and effortless to us, is insurmountable to one who is trying to overcome an issue. Take care. Cindy

Another culprit is how much fluid are you taking in? You could very well be dehydrated which could cause your blood pressure to drop, thereby making you dizzy. No matter what it is, you should absolutely see your Doc asap and find out exactly what's causing it and get the proper medical attention. Good luck, congradulations on your baby. Keep us posted. Cindy

Sorry to hear you're have such a hard time, but don't give up, in the end you will eventually win because you deserve to be treated better than that. I know how aggravating it can be, BCBS of Florida turned me down originally, but after a great deal of work and perserverance, I finally got them to cover it. So I know it's possible to get them to change their minds. I'm glad there are so many knowledeble people on this site so they can help guide you. I will keep you in my thoughts and prayers!!!! Don't let 'em keep you down!!! Cindy

You are certainly not alone, you've got more company than you could possibly ever want. Not only did I not have a crush on Donny Osmond, I spent all of my time trying to figure out why couldn't I look like Marie???? She had it all, the looks, the personality, the talent, the money, she had it all I say. Eventually she ended up with the depression too. So sad, I think it has something to do with the Estrogen or that gene that determines boy or girl. Me, I have no more estrogen, hyster sister for ten years now, and the only girl in my family, besides my mom. So the tomboy thing has always been more my style, I use to climb into the tree house all the time growing up and throughly loved it. Don't get me wrong, on a sexual basis, I do prefer men, if I'm in the mood, which is practically never, thanks to the antidepressants. You'd think they would crank it up, not put it out. Sighhhhh! So sorry to hear that you're feeling so blue. But if it helps, at 49 years old I too am studying for a new career. I know I should be preparing for retirement, but until I can afford it I still have to work and since I got laid off, I figure I might as well do something I enjoy. Please take care of yourself. I have enjoyed your posts more than anyone elses, although everyone is so caring, there's something about your sense of humor that really makes me laugh out loud. So for that alone, I thank you. Cindy

I would also like to mention, that depression is unfortunately one of the 'side effects' of obesity. Your description of how you have nothing to feel bad about, sounds like it may be more of a chemical reaction than an issues problem. But only the counselor will be able to help you sort that out and guide you as to what you need to do next. Just remember all of us are here for you any time of the day or night. This is the best support group I have ever participated in and I believe everyone here is quite genuine. Enjoy your vaction, try to stop beating yourself up, you don't deserve that and take care of things when you get back. No one could ask for more than that. Also, remember, it's only food, not a criminal offense. Sadly, you are only hurting yourself, not committing some terrible crime. This path is not easy, but no one ever said it would be. You were strong enough to make the decision to get banded, and you will succeed. Take Care Cindy aka chichigirl

Welcome and congradulations on your decision for a healthy lifestyle. You have certainly come to the right place for answers to your questions and a shoulder to lean on when neccessary. People here are great, very well informed and very thoughtful and compassionate as well. We all relate to the issues of obesity in a way only those who have been through this can. You have made the right choice coming here. I will look forward to following your success along with everyone else's. Take care, Cindy aka chichigirl