Sharon1964

I try to only have them away from home. Otherwise I think I could snarf down the whole box of salted caramel power crunch bars. It's the crunch. It does me in. Mmmmm. Crunch. When you bite into it, you get the resistance to your teeth, then it gives way with a satisfying crunch, then it kind of melts in your mouth, with just a touch of salty to the smooth caramel... sheee-it, I think I need a smoke now.

So it's been just under a week since moving day. My insomnia appears resolved (cross fingers). The house is much calmer. I didn't realize how much anxiety there was, until there wasn't.

And last weekend I came out to my 12 year old daughter. Her only question was, "can he marry you too?" I told her that the law only allows you to be married to one person at a time. Other than that, "cool Beans."

You could also try making your own:

You may not be able to find it. In France, you can sometimes find it. It's made by Danone, under the Jockey label. Look for a tub, possibly with a green and white sleeve. It is labeled "Cottage Cheese", and "Fromage Frais Salé."

Ok, PM me your fetlife name and I'll stalk you there too!

It's amazing the little things you let slide when you're trying to get along with someone, and how peaceful it feels when you don't have to do that anymore. Yesterday, as I walked naked down the hall to the kid's room, I said to the kid, "Now we can walk around the house naked if we want to and no one will yell at us." Mom didn't like parts uncovered. And no, we're not nudists. My delicates drawer is currently residing in the kid's dresser, while I'm waiting for the dresser I ordered to come in. So I needed some delicates. And no, this thread does not need pictures (for anyone who was going to say it!).

Okay, I just looked at your stats. We both had surgery in August 2015. You started at 402, I started at 403. You weigh 239 right now, I weigh 238. We're both on fetlife. Fess up! Long-lost twin sister? or Stalker???

I'm active in my local BDSM group, and there's a lot of crossover there to poly. I hang with two distinct groups of poly; one is much more BDSM-friendly than the other. You could try fetlife.com as there are a lot of poly groups there. It's free to join. Also, okcupid has an option for being in an "open" relationship, I think you can set your search parameters for that. By the way, those girls aren't totally okay with it. They just want you. They either THINK they can be okay with it, or they think they are awesome enough that you won't want anyone else, or once you fall in love with them you won't want anyone else. It's a common problem.

Just thinking about you.

Update: Every. Single. Fiber. In. My. Body. Is. Screaming. Saturday, took the rest of the miscellaneous stuff to mom's new place. Kid and I spent the day shopping, picking up new bedding for both of us, a chest of drawers for me, a trundle storage unit for under her bed, groceries, etc. We were in motion from about 7 am until 3 pm. Then I went home and sat down for 30 minutes. Then I tried to stand up. Hah! My legs say "no way, beeeyotch!". I finally got up and as long as I stayed in motion I was okay. As soon as I sat down, everything seized up. Jeez, I need to get to the gym! Sunday, my sister came over with her teenage boys and a pickup truck, took the rest of mom's stuff (bed, dresser, the big stuff). She was out by about 10am. Then kid and I started on the house. Three years of dust from deep under the bed had to be vacuumed. Then disassemble her bunk bed (and me cursing the fact that I bought a solid wood bed, which is hella heavy). Right when we were about to start moving it into her room, my guy friend showed up - YAY! MAN MUSCLE! We got the bunks back together, then had to go pick up the trundle, which we discovered didn't fit in my baby suv, so had to go borrow the truck, drive back to the store, etc. There is no way I would have been able to get that into my house without man muscle. Super heavy. Get that assembled, beds made, have kid take everything from my room that belongs to her and put it in the living room, so I can start on my room while she puts her things away. Then. Boom. Ran out of steam. Couldn't do another thing. Well, there was one thing. While the kid was busy in her room, we snuck a standing quickie. Go me! Guy friend had to leave, so kid and I went and had dinner. Got my second wind, vacuumed my room (another three years of dust from under the kid's bed). Finally dropped, exhausted. Well, not too exhausted (you knew that was coming, didn't you??). I welcomed Big Buzzy back into my bed. It's been a long time, my friend. Slept like a rock, first time in a couple of months. Big Buzzy... because two heads are better than one! Hot, hot shower this morning. Sat down here to update my weight, and started typing this. Now I know my legs are going to scream at me again when I try to stand up. I still need to put up my new bed (I bought a new frame, which is higher than my old one, and a new headboard), and work on clearing the living room. And wash some blankets that I'm going to put away for the summer.

She changed her name and then edited. Alex changed it back, but it won't change the "edited by" line.

Any update?

Tired today, stayed home from work and just chilled. Also, told my boss it was surely stress-induced and therefore his fault. Normally, with any type of injury, my go-to response is "hot date." Keeps people guessing. LOL. In this case, no, fun has not been had since Saturday night. A successful date is one that does NOT end with a call to 911. Just sayin'.

I have been assured that THAT had nothing to do with it! Uhh... I mean, no, why do you ask???

I've had pleurisy before, which is an inflammation of the lining of the lungs. This is costochondritis. Costochondritis (kos-toe-kon-DRY-tis) is an inflammation of the cartilage that connects a rib to the breastbone (sternum). Pain caused by costochondritis might mimic that of a heart attack or other heart conditions. Costochondritis is sometimes known as chest wall pain, costosternal syndrome or costosternal chondrodynia. Sometimes, swelling accompanies the pain (Tietze syndrome). Costochondritis usually has no apparent cause. Treatment focuses on easing your pain while you wait for the condition to improve on its own, which can take several weeks or longer. Costochondritis usually goes away on its own, although it might last for several weeks or longer. Treatment focuses on pain relief.

The short version is I spent a long night in the E.R. with chest pain, dizziness, clamminess, nausea. Turns out to be inflammation of the cartilage that attaches your ribs to your sternum and spine. Painful, scary, but not dangerous. No cardiac involvement at all. While I was there, I thought of you all. I was about to tell someone that if something happened, they had to come here and tell my peeps. Cuz y'all are my peeps. Just so you know.

@@Margie122 She will be about one mile away. One of the things that got her calmed down was my sister pointing out the fact that their relationship (mom and sister) got so much better after mom moved out.

So the second night, she brought it up to me. She was focusing on the fact that I said "I'm never alone" which was not my main complaint. She got all butthurt again, and finally I said, "maybe it's time to think about living apart"... I hadn't planned on bringing that up, but I really didn't want to go through this every night until my next therapy appointment (next week). She not only gave me the silent treatment that evening, but she spent the evening in her room, which she never does. So yesterday, she put a deposit down on a studio apartment nearby. She went and talked to my sister (the one she used to live with), and sister got her calmed down. She now seems excited about moving and things are not weird. Go figure. LOL.

It definitely sounds like a fitting problem. Have you tried tightening up the straps a little? I've had to do that several times. If your mouth is filling with air, then your mask isn't fitting the way it should.

So I saw the therapist yesterday. He wanted me to start with just trying to get her to talk about what was going on. Yeah, that went over like a lead balloon. I brought it up after dinner, after the kid had gone to her room. She got butthurt, told me how good I had it, and hasn't spoken to me since. I'm going to try again tonight. It's amazing I know how to communicate at all, given what my role model was.

She sees a doctor, after ignoring her health for 20 years and going into heart failure. That was her wakeup call. That didn't change her attitude though. She has not had a mental health evaluation. When she was living with my sister, she wanted to move out and my sister wanted her to move out, but neither would bring up the subject. So I did, they talked it out, and she moved out. At that time, she was treating my sister's boys the same way she is treating my daughter. I confronted her and told her I thought she needed to see someone and be evaluated for antidepressants. She said just let her get moved out and things will get better. I suppose they did for a while. Now not so much.

I've had insomnia for about two months now. No matter what time I go to bed, I wake up at around 1 am and again around 4 am. Sometimes I can get back to sleep within a half hour, sometimes not. I've done a lot of soul-searching to try to figure out what has been stressing me. I have an appointment with a therapist on Monday to figure this out, but in the meantime, I think I've got it. It's my mother. She moved in with me about three years ago. We lived together back when my 21-year-old was born, for about five years. Then she lived with my sister for several years, then alone for a couple of years, then with me. The reason she moved in with me this time was that the place she was living in alone was being sold, and she needed to move. She couldn't find an affordable apartment nearby (my area doesn't have a lot of vacancies), so I let her move in with me. The problem is I do not like the way she treats my 12-year-old daughter. Apparently when she lived with my sister, she treated sister's boys the same way. She never had a problem with my oldest (and yeah, we were all a lot younger then). As I have mellowed as I've gotten older, mom has gotten more intense. She takes everything personally. And as anyone with a pre-teen girl knows, it's an emotional rollercoaster anyway. Mom acts like the kid is doing things to deliberately provoke her, and I know that's not true. When I call mom on talking to the kid in a mean fashion, her go-to response is "she started it". Of course, then I tell her that as the adult, I expect her to model good behavior. No, the kid isn't innocent, and I deal with that - it's just so much harder when mom is doing the same thing. I am not looking forward to this. She is going to be butt-hurt, and the stress is going to go through the roof. Sigh. I want ice cream. Ice cream is not my friend, but it pretends to be. It doesn't give me any verbal grief, it's cool and creamy, and it tastes good. Sigh. Instead of ice cream, I'll have to ask the man-types for some extra "attention" to relieve stress. No real point here, just getting crap out of my head.

I don't eat until I'm full. I eat until I've eaten the amount I'm supposed to, which is what I've already measured out onto my plate.

I was at a party last weekend, and someone walked past me that I haven't seen in a couple of years. We made eye contact, I smiled, and he had no reaction. He kept looking at me, probably to try to figure out why this woman he doesn't know was grinning like an idiot. Finally, I said, "Mike, it's (name I use with that group)". When he "got it", it was awesome. Yeah, I go to parties where people use pseudonyms.