bewell

There but for the grace of life and a lot of hard work go I........
It's so easy to judge and be righteous and push some else to the bottom of the heap. The harder way is to try to understand and relate.
Maybe we can choose to remember that we all reached a point where we would do ANYTHING not to feel the pain of being obese. And my guess is that for all of us we tried many times and many ways to lose weight before we were successful. Even with success, every day I know that I can fall off the wagon and once more be humbled, pick my self up and try again.
For me food obsession and addiction is always waiting for me. My mind can always try to fool me into taking that bite of something that starts the downward spiral.
This blog is a way for us to remember that we were once there too. Let's be honest.....we could be there again!

From what I understand we can't drink anything with fizzle.
And it's not worth messing around with your recent surgery. The worst thing that could happen is you drink the fizzle and stress your new tummy that is healing. A leak would put you back in the hospital with possibly horrible complications.

You've come too far to mess around with the doctors instructions. Especially during the initial 0-4 months of healing.
In time that craving for fizzle will go away and all the effort not to drink fizzle will be worth every ounce.
Listen to the Doc, they know what they are doing.

I had a terrible time with the loss of my favorite pastime eating, and yes I even missed the following wallowing in self-hate. After the sleeve I even planned and binged on my first broccoli and in retrospect that is hilarious. I vomited up the green mess with vengence just like Rosemary's baby devil!!
Missing the joy of some foods and over eating does go away and for me it took about 2 months. I also had to have therapy. I was terrified of being a smaller size and not able to defend myself. Lots of crazy emotions that 1st 2 months post-op. (turned out to be sexual abuse at a young age and somehow I concluded if I was fat no one would hurt me. I expect it worked when I was 8 yrs which I continued for a lifetime.)
My therapist suggested a "funeral" of sorts to let go of the loss of eating. I wrote about it, had a one person "ceremony" about how being obese had been my protection but I didn't need it any longer. I didn't need to be afraid of being a smaller size and looked to future of a healthy, active life. It really helped me.
Today I don't miss the eating of food (except occasionally and that is totally HEAD-crap.) Feeling good and being able to move around and enjoy life is so much better than the self-imposed hell I was in pre-sleeve.

I agree that there are a lot of people--not just on here--who seem to be either extremely ill-informed or willfully disregarding their surgeon's instructions...
...however, these types of threads make me really nervous about posting anything on this site in the future. I'm still pretty new, both to this site and to WLS (I was sleeved 3 weeks ago). I posted a thread a while back with that I thought was a reasonable question. I'd looked through search results, had left a message with my surgeon's office, and just wanted some opinions because I couldn't stop obsessing/worrying. A few days later, someone posted a ranting thread which mentioned essentially the same scenario that I'd asked about. I had to assume that it was a complaint against me, but I wish the member had sent me a private message instead of calling me out publicly. And yes, I agree with @@judyoz that it's usually not hard to figure out who is being ranted about, which I think is worse (and kinda passive-aggressive) than just bluntly responding to the post or PMing the OP.
So, while there are certainly plenty of people who may just be on here to try to get someone to justify their poor decisions, most of us newbies are looking for a community of support when we can't even tell a lot of people in our "real lives" about our WLS, let alone talk about the nitty-gritty details.

I guess some don't take this major life altering/life giving procedure as seriously as others. If you're rushing to have a drink after surgery, you probably have another problem to solve. Not my business, but I do understand the sentiment.

This thread is a scream, I'm probably guilty of feeling some of the exact same things, although, I have been a whiner in the last week or so. I am only 4 1/2 weeks out and have stalled. I needed to read this to get my head back on straight. I think part of the issue is also peer and family pressure, I get asked "how much have you lost" a hundred or two times. I think we get in the trap of having to "prove" why we decided to have surgery. Other people have much higher expectations than myself and I need to find a way to verbalize to them its really not just about the amount of weight I have lost. I know they think they are being helpful and cheering me on, but I feel shamed when I can't report a loss and I know its just normal at this stage in my journey. Honestly the thing that makes my head explode is the seemingly complete lack of education and understanding of what is going on physiologically in their bodies. I see people posting about eating no no foods and drinks and not using the right Proteins etc etc. The when can I drink question gets me too, but I'm not going to lie, I miss my wine so will try not to whine about my wine

This is not a nice subject to respond to but I am going to.
For all of you that are judging this 20 year old girl in a negative way,
Do you remember being 20 years old?
Were you regular sized or obese?
Did you like to party?
I was an obese 20 year old that liked to drink and go to bars. Always wishing I was as "thin" as my friends. Of course there was not WLS available back then so I do not know what I would have done.
But for goodness sake she was being honest and truthful in her questions. Have a heart. Be kind, I can only imagine what she is thinking as she reads all these replys.
On another note, those that post about not losing weight and "doing all the right things" you have one of two things going on, you are lying or it is just part of the process. There are many posts you can search and read BEFORE posting.

I have a lot of empathy for the people who haven't quite internalized the fact that in order to be successful, their lifestyles have to totally change. I was in their shoes early in the process. Even though I had read and researched and met with a nutritionist, I still, in the back of my head, thought I could keep doing things my way. It wasn't that I didn't have the facts. It just took me a while to accept them. So my head doesn't explode when I read those kinds of posts. I believe that these people can come to terms with their new way of life and be successful, especially when we, who understand what they are feeling, give them the benefit of our experience.

Thank you for posting this. I, too, was abused at a young age and that may have been the beginning of my problems, too. Also had an emotionally absent dad and married an emotionally absent husband, which really packed on the pounds. I have been in therapy almost 3 years now to deal with that. I know I will still need to deal with it more after surgery, as food is still my go-to for stress or anger relief.
I'd be surprised if anyone didn't have some feelings of loss and depression after surgery. Also, I've read that rapid weight loss causes dumping of hormones into the blood stream quickly, which can cause mood swings and depression.
p.s. I meant to say thanks for sharing the idea of the "funeral" as well - I need to do this.

From what I understand we can't drink anything with fizzle.
And it's not worth messing around with your recent surgery. The worst thing that could happen is you drink the fizzle and stress your new tummy that is healing. A leak would put you back in the hospital with possibly horrible complications.

You've come too far to mess around with the doctors instructions. Especially during the initial 0-4 months of healing.
In time that craving for fizzle will go away and all the effort not to drink fizzle will be worth every ounce.
Listen to the Doc, they know what they are doing.

I also have hip pain that wasn't there before. I think it's because I'm moving a lot more AND my body is totally out of balance now that my big belly is smaller. I still walk like I've got 65 pounds on me.
I started getting rolfed 6 weeks ago and it has helped realign my body to a more normal gate. I also am having physical therapy to strengthen muscles that were under used at 275 lbs.
I'm hoping this will take care of it.

I had a terrible time with the loss of my favorite pastime eating, and yes I even missed the following wallowing in self-hate. After the sleeve I even planned and binged on my first broccoli and in retrospect that is hilarious. I vomited up the green mess with vengence just like Rosemary's baby devil!!
Missing the joy of some foods and over eating does go away and for me it took about 2 months. I also had to have therapy. I was terrified of being a smaller size and not able to defend myself. Lots of crazy emotions that 1st 2 months post-op. (turned out to be sexual abuse at a young age and somehow I concluded if I was fat no one would hurt me. I expect it worked when I was 8 yrs which I continued for a lifetime.)
My therapist suggested a "funeral" of sorts to let go of the loss of eating. I wrote about it, had a one person "ceremony" about how being obese had been my protection but I didn't need it any longer. I didn't need to be afraid of being a smaller size and looked to future of a healthy, active life. It really helped me.
Today I don't miss the eating of food (except occasionally and that is totally HEAD-crap.) Feeling good and being able to move around and enjoy life is so much better than the self-imposed hell I was in pre-sleeve.

Oh and today one beautiful ripe blueberry or perfectly cooked vegetable can almost be orgasmic. (can I say that here?)

Oh and today one beautiful ripe blueberry or perfectly cooked vegetable can almost be orgasmic. (can I say that here?)

From what I understand we can't drink anything with fizzle.
And it's not worth messing around with your recent surgery. The worst thing that could happen is you drink the fizzle and stress your new tummy that is healing. A leak would put you back in the hospital with possibly horrible complications.

You've come too far to mess around with the doctors instructions. Especially during the initial 0-4 months of healing.
In time that craving for fizzle will go away and all the effort not to drink fizzle will be worth every ounce.
Listen to the Doc, they know what they are doing.

My experience is, I don't feel full until it's too late! I had a lot of problems with vomiting and it was because I didn't STOP before I was full. The doc said STOP before you feel full and I just kept eating looking for that familiar full feeling.
I had to let that go and now I just know how much I can eat before I am satiated. (The satiated kind of full feeling comes 30-40 minutes AFTER I stop eating.)
Having said all that, I have learned to recognize a very subtle feeling while I'm eating that I've had enough. BUT it isn't like the pre-surgery eating till I had a stuffed feeling. It is much more subtle. A sense of feeling kind of full even when my crazy head is saying eat more. I think it's what normal eaters feel knowing it's enough and in 30 minutes the body will tell them, yep that was enough food.
It took me a long time to get rid of the OLD head habits associated with eating.
The first 3 weeks I just about jumped out of my skin. I was so used to thinking about eating, eating, and then hating myself for overeating I didn't know what to do with my self and my feelings. The emotional part of the weight loss was very hard for me. I did start seeing an experienced therapist early on and it really helped get me through the first 3 months.
So my suggestion to you.......don't make my mistake and when they say you can only eat a few tablespoons, well that's it. The amount I could eat post-op and still if VERY SMALL! Just follow your docs instructions and let your body get used to it. Recognize you may have a lot of HEAD-games going on from the drastic change in eating.
Best to you!

To me, 6 months PLUS is where the rubber hits the road.
Will I lose the last 50 pounds?!!?!!
Can I keep my sleeve weight loss program going and NOT start get sloppy with food and attitude.
Because I feel really good at 63lbs lighter my crazy mind keeps saying...maybe this weight is good enough. IT's NOT. I didn't do all of this to give up at the half way goal!!! Or get sloppy and gain some back! Crazy monkey mind gets me in trouble if I'm not paying attention.
Besides being in a staff for 2 weeks all is well.
Best too all of you and keep up the good work.

Sorry to keep writing but I wanted to be sure you knew my 1/4 to 1/3 cup of food was not until 2 months out or more. And 1/3 cup depends on if it's just meat or cottage cheese. If it's beef I might only eat 15 SMALL bites. I also just started beef at 5 months out.
Also when others started eating solids and regular food I couldn't. I didn't start eating a few soft vegetables until 12 weeks. Salads maybe at 4 months. Everyone is different, so when you read someone is eating meat or whatever, you may or may not be ready for that food
Vomiting is the LAST thing you want to do, so I suggest to be on the safe side, take it slow and listen to your body. Be gentle with yourself, it is a huge change in life and takes time to learn and adjust.
Again, you'll do great and congratulations on a new life!

My experience is, I don't feel full until it's too late! I had a lot of problems with vomiting and it was because I didn't STOP before I was full. The doc said STOP before you feel full and I just kept eating looking for that familiar full feeling.
I had to let that go and now I just know how much I can eat before I am satiated. (The satiated kind of full feeling comes 30-40 minutes AFTER I stop eating.)
Having said all that, I have learned to recognize a very subtle feeling while I'm eating that I've had enough. BUT it isn't like the pre-surgery eating till I had a stuffed feeling. It is much more subtle. A sense of feeling kind of full even when my crazy head is saying eat more. I think it's what normal eaters feel knowing it's enough and in 30 minutes the body will tell them, yep that was enough food.
It took me a long time to get rid of the OLD head habits associated with eating.
The first 3 weeks I just about jumped out of my skin. I was so used to thinking about eating, eating, and then hating myself for overeating I didn't know what to do with my self and my feelings. The emotional part of the weight loss was very hard for me. I did start seeing an experienced therapist early on and it really helped get me through the first 3 months.
So my suggestion to you.......don't make my mistake and when they say you can only eat a few tablespoons, well that's it. The amount I could eat post-op and still if VERY SMALL! Just follow your docs instructions and let your body get used to it. Recognize you may have a lot of HEAD-games going on from the drastic change in eating.
Best to you!

Sorry to keep writing but I wanted to be sure you knew my 1/4 to 1/3 cup of food was not until 2 months out or more. And 1/3 cup depends on if it's just meat or cottage cheese. If it's beef I might only eat 15 SMALL bites. I also just started beef at 5 months out.
Also when others started eating solids and regular food I couldn't. I didn't start eating a few soft vegetables until 12 weeks. Salads maybe at 4 months. Everyone is different, so when you read someone is eating meat or whatever, you may or may not be ready for that food
Vomiting is the LAST thing you want to do, so I suggest to be on the safe side, take it slow and listen to your body. Be gentle with yourself, it is a huge change in life and takes time to learn and adjust.
Again, you'll do great and congratulations on a new life!

One more thing.....it turned out for me I need to eat 4-5 small meals a day. That worked best for my body and how I can get enough calories in. I just couldn't eat enough 3 times a day to get the nutrition I needed. I worked with my doc and my NUT and that's how it worked for me.
And today, just ONE hard boiled egg is perfect. That keeps me feeling full for 4 hours. It's amazing. If someone told me ONE hard boiled egg would be enough food for me, I'd have said they were crazy! But it is. So 3 eggs a day isn't enough food so that's why I need to eat more small meals. Small meaning 1/4 to 1/3 cup of food. Sometimes it's just one small yogurt. Or a few nuts and little fruit. Or 3 oz of meat. If I eat out, I eat an appetizer.
It's hard to get used to eating a small amount of food. Especially when my head wants that OLD very FULL feeling.

My experience is, I don't feel full until it's too late! I had a lot of problems with vomiting and it was because I didn't STOP before I was full. The doc said STOP before you feel full and I just kept eating looking for that familiar full feeling.
I had to let that go and now I just know how much I can eat before I am satiated. (The satiated kind of full feeling comes 30-40 minutes AFTER I stop eating.)
Having said all that, I have learned to recognize a very subtle feeling while I'm eating that I've had enough. BUT it isn't like the pre-surgery eating till I had a stuffed feeling. It is much more subtle. A sense of feeling kind of full even when my crazy head is saying eat more. I think it's what normal eaters feel knowing it's enough and in 30 minutes the body will tell them, yep that was enough food.
It took me a long time to get rid of the OLD head habits associated with eating.
The first 3 weeks I just about jumped out of my skin. I was so used to thinking about eating, eating, and then hating myself for overeating I didn't know what to do with my self and my feelings. The emotional part of the weight loss was very hard for me. I did start seeing an experienced therapist early on and it really helped get me through the first 3 months.
So my suggestion to you.......don't make my mistake and when they say you can only eat a few tablespoons, well that's it. The amount I could eat post-op and still if VERY SMALL! Just follow your docs instructions and let your body get used to it. Recognize you may have a lot of HEAD-games going on from the drastic change in eating.
Best to you!

Sorry to keep writing but I wanted to be sure you knew my 1/4 to 1/3 cup of food was not until 2 months out or more. And 1/3 cup depends on if it's just meat or cottage cheese. If it's beef I might only eat 15 SMALL bites. I also just started beef at 5 months out.
Also when others started eating solids and regular food I couldn't. I didn't start eating a few soft vegetables until 12 weeks. Salads maybe at 4 months. Everyone is different, so when you read someone is eating meat or whatever, you may or may not be ready for that food
Vomiting is the LAST thing you want to do, so I suggest to be on the safe side, take it slow and listen to your body. Be gentle with yourself, it is a huge change in life and takes time to learn and adjust.
Again, you'll do great and congratulations on a new life!

One more thing.....it turned out for me I need to eat 4-5 small meals a day. That worked best for my body and how I can get enough calories in. I just couldn't eat enough 3 times a day to get the nutrition I needed. I worked with my doc and my NUT and that's how it worked for me.
And today, just ONE hard boiled egg is perfect. That keeps me feeling full for 4 hours. It's amazing. If someone told me ONE hard boiled egg would be enough food for me, I'd have said they were crazy! But it is. So 3 eggs a day isn't enough food so that's why I need to eat more small meals. Small meaning 1/4 to 1/3 cup of food. Sometimes it's just one small yogurt. Or a few nuts and little fruit. Or 3 oz of meat. If I eat out, I eat an appetizer.
It's hard to get used to eating a small amount of food. Especially when my head wants that OLD very FULL feeling.

My experience is, I don't feel full until it's too late! I had a lot of problems with vomiting and it was because I didn't STOP before I was full. The doc said STOP before you feel full and I just kept eating looking for that familiar full feeling.
I had to let that go and now I just know how much I can eat before I am satiated. (The satiated kind of full feeling comes 30-40 minutes AFTER I stop eating.)
Having said all that, I have learned to recognize a very subtle feeling while I'm eating that I've had enough. BUT it isn't like the pre-surgery eating till I had a stuffed feeling. It is much more subtle. A sense of feeling kind of full even when my crazy head is saying eat more. I think it's what normal eaters feel knowing it's enough and in 30 minutes the body will tell them, yep that was enough food.
It took me a long time to get rid of the OLD head habits associated with eating.
The first 3 weeks I just about jumped out of my skin. I was so used to thinking about eating, eating, and then hating myself for overeating I didn't know what to do with my self and my feelings. The emotional part of the weight loss was very hard for me. I did start seeing an experienced therapist early on and it really helped get me through the first 3 months.
So my suggestion to you.......don't make my mistake and when they say you can only eat a few tablespoons, well that's it. The amount I could eat post-op and still if VERY SMALL! Just follow your docs instructions and let your body get used to it. Recognize you may have a lot of HEAD-games going on from the drastic change in eating.
Best to you!