bellabloom

..

I'm starting to realize this is just so difficult. The main problem is I have a tiny capacity to eat!! Today I had Thai curry, salad with peanut dressing, a chai latte, fruit, olives, cheese and crackers and a sandwich. It's 6pm and I'm at 900 calories. I am so full I can barely move. No way is anything else getting in there or I'll throw up for sure. I have so much restriction, that is the hardest thing about this. Slider foods like processed crackers and chips just gross me out. I want salads, vegetables.... Fresh real food!! Really heavy fat stuff makes me so nervous to eat. This is a struggle. My weight came up to 119 for a few days after two days of non stop fast food and soda. It has now dropped back 116, I just couldn't stand to eat any more crap like that. Definitely on a downward trend.

It does seem like you're irritated by a lot of people's issues on here lately... I'm of the opinion that any response is fine as long as it's delivered in a constructive and respectful way. I don't think calling people "immature" for their honest thoughts and experiences is okay. People make mistakes, no one is perfect. And we are entitled to our choices!! Most of us here on BP are going through a life changing experience. It's an emotional roller coaster and I hope, at the very least, we can try to keep things kind and not judge.

Very well said. I so relate!!! You're not alone. Many of this hit these issues when at goal. It's tough. Don't be embarrassed.

It was a mixture of drinks, mostly shots, a jager bomb, a red headed ****, and crown and diet coke. At most it was probably 800-1000 calories as they are about 90-100 calories a drink. Look, it was my choice. I chose to have fun that night and I had a blast. However, it did not get me drunk but it did to my friends. I did not gain anything. In fact, I lost 4 lbs this past weekend, bringing me down to the weight I was in High School and officially making me only overweight and not in the obese category any longer. If you are going to b***h about me over something then chose the holidays. I gained 3 lbs over xmas but I turned around and lost that in about 4 days. It's okay to live a little! Alcohol makes me lose weight too. That's why this is double dangerous for you!! Have fun, enjoy... Just keep your head on a swivel!!

Hey, if you can handle it power to you! There is nothing wrong with having fun. I really enjoy drinking wine and champagne and I admit I love a good party! Everyone is different in this regard as to how they handle alcohol. My point was just that at first I didn't notice a difference in how alcohol affected me. It took awhile and suddenly my body just can't handle it any more. I think being aware of the possibility of cross addictions is really wise. Most of us over ate as a coping mechanism and when that is taken away something wants to fill that void. I'm super aware that this is a possibility for me having a pretty bad eating disorder and my history of coping with self destructive behaviors. That's why I'm shutting down drinking right away rather than playing with fire. My body obviously can't handle it. It's enough already that I'm fighting to maintain my weight.

All I can say is that I completely relate. In fact, you put it better than I have in other posts. The surgery definitely affects appetite long term. The way I feel hunger is not the same and the way I feel full is not the same. But you say you are hungry- so I'm thinking maybe you're just mentally a little frustrated. The three bites of food thing. It does get really really old. No matter how hungry I get, food just doesn't have that same wow factor it used to. And that's a mentally challenging fact to live with. I wish I had some advice to give you. It's hard when eating feels like a chore. We all know it is something we HAVE to do however. I'm working on my non desire to eat by allowing myself total freedom to eat what I want. That's helps a little. When eating is a chore, high calorie foods help. Things like nuts. It only takes a minute to eat them and not much effort, and your getting your calories. Protein however... So much work. Sigh. Hang in there. Hope it gets better.

Your rmr is what you burn doing nothing but breathing. You've said your very active with household/horse duties ect during the day, so I am guessing your tots caloric usage for the date is quite a bit higher. Rmr really isn't that useful to know because depending on your activity level it could be a much higher amount that you actually need. To figure out what you actually need, the best way is to begin tracking your caloric intake for awhile and monitor your weight using an app like lose it. A couple weeks should give you an idea of what you actually burn in a day. If you lose weight, you need more. Gain weight, less. I'm guessing you fall around 2000 with a rmr of 1600. My rmr is 1250 but I need about 1900 at a light activity level, to give you an idea. Once you know how many calories you need to maintain, make a small deduction to lose body fat. 250-500 calories. I'd say 250 is best to lose it slow. That will allow your body to lose body fat. You could also not cut calories at all but simply add in cardio workouts. Weight training all burns body fat. If your working out and not eating more, you'll lose body fat slowly. To gain muscle, you need a weight training regime. 3-4 days of resistance training per week will do the trick. Consistency matters. Cardio- burns body fat and raises rmr temporarily. Weights- increase muscle mass and raise rmr permanently. I would suggest hiring a trainer for a couple sessions to explain how to lift weights to increase muscle. There are various ways of doing it. Hope this helps!

I struggle with constipation daily. I'm pretty sure I always will. One thing I know is that laxatives make it much worse. They work the first time or two, but after that they won't work and they will make it worse and worse. After taking laxatives once I did not go for 7 days. You want to drop the laxatives and get on a bowel protocol. Start with Metamucil Fiber pills, 2-4 daily. Prune juice. Magnesium citrate 1 time daily. Water. Fruit in your diet. Give this a few days and it will work.

I honestly know if I met a guy and really liked his humor and personality and there was chemistry, a less than perfect body would not matter to me. Don't worry. You'll find someone amazing.

I know!!!!!! Hahaha head on shoulders. Eyes up Bella eyes up!!!

This isn't buying a horse. This is a lifesaving and life changing surgery. You can't compare the two at all. This isn't a luxury. It's a necessity. The tone and negativity sadden me. This should be a supportive forum because we are all fighting battles.

Eeeeeek. I met someone this morning I'm suppppppppper attracted to!!! Oh no!! I said yes to a second date!!! He's a family guy, owns franchises, cute as hell and gets my sense of humor. I am so crushing!!! Only red flag so far- very recently divorced. I'm the first girl he has gone out with. ???? scary.

That is so awesome!!! I am beyond happy for you!!!

It tookMe about 9-10 months. No, don't buy clothes!!! Thrift stores.

It really depends on what it is and how slow I eat. I can eat a cup of salad/vegetables. I can eat a small burrito. Half a large chipotle one. I can eat a small taco and chips and salsa. I can eat 1.5 small pizza slices. A cup of Cereal with fruit. 2 ounces of steak and a couple bites of veggies. A cup of soup. Now I'm hungry. At certain times of day I can eat more than at others. I struggle with evening and morning. Can't usually eat too much those meals. lunch is usually the larger meal I can handle.

I would remain low carb until after you reach your goal. What you have been eating seems to be working, why change it? Maybe add in some new recipes for variety but yes, stick with low carb until goal.

I eat popcorn without the butter. It doesn't have all that many calories. I also take in beef Jerky and chopped fruit.

Eating like crap to me means I ate things that didn't sit well with my body. Examples: soda, candy, in and out, too much caffeine, potato chips, too much sugar. I try not to make any foods forbidden because that would just make me want to eat them more. I try and focus on eating what I know will make me feel good all day.

Eeeek I have so many little "dates" planned this week. Oh god how is it going to go!! Hahaa. Always a roller coaster ride. Maybe I'll meet the love of my life! Maybe I'll just eat a lot a sushi.

"That big girl" could be a compliment in his eyes. Lots of men prefer larger women. LOTS of them.

Thank you. What a wonderful post. I have also felt badly about my loose skin and worried about how men felt. I feel embarrassed to have had surgery sometimes. I have told a few men about my surgery and weight loss and all of them still wanted to date me. Yet it still doesn't reach my head that it doesn't matter! That we are a sum of our parts and attraction doesn't come down to one or two flaws but is a whole picture thing. You're beautiful and I can tell a funny and smart person. I am too and that's the truth. Love has to start at home, don't you think? I'm proud of you for all of your accomplishments.

I have been going through a time of being very down on myself for the loose skin on my neck and stomach areas. I know I'm being a jerk to myself and the right guy won't even care at all. It's just hard after going through so much to lose the weight to still have things bothering me. Eventually I will pay for plastics but for now I just want to be able to love myself and still be intimate with a man if I find one to love. I don't want to put my life on hold. That was a great article and it really shows how we are our biggest judges when the rest of the world thinks we are beautiful.

What a terrible thing to say to her. She's obviously desperate. This is a life saving surgery and I say get the money HOWEVER you can and think will work! I would begged and borrowed to get my surgery done. Not everyone has means or insurance and we should be supportive. Not say rude things or act heartless. If I had gotten denied it would have crushed me. My advice. Hang in there. Stay creative. Perhaps get a loan, if you can and have decent credit. I would consider Mexico as an option. What about getting a different insurance? Can you get on a marketplace plan? Mine covered me. Even if it meant changing jobs. Seriously. This surgery is worth it. I hope you're doing okay.

Keep trying. Just have fun with it. I get rejected sometimes and I just move on. There are a million people out there and there is a lid to every pot. Keep going out on dates and you'll find your match. Don't just email a girl once. Try a couple times. Email every girl you think you could possibly like. It's hard to tell from a picture wether there could be chemistry. Don't just say "hi". Say something like "hi beautiful! You seem smart and interesting! How do you like sushi?" Always ask a question so it's easy for them to start a conversation with you. Have at least 5 or 6 pictures that are clear up of yourself. Make sure your profile has correct spelling and grammar. List your height and talk about yourself. Girls do read profiles. Try to be funny with it. If a girl goes out with you, ALWAYS insist on paying the first and probably second date. Take a girl out to coffee for the first date. That way it won't cost much if there is no spark. Keep trying. She is out there.