SkinnyDown

Hi, and what a strange question! I would think anybody that would still feel a need to play around with this process has a reduced chance of making it long term but it takes all types, plus I realize that this is what makes us human: we simply HAVE to push against boundaries... I've been doing that my whole life. Personally, at this juncture, I am determined enough and frankly frightened by the whole process enough as to be uncharacteristically obedient and very careful and diligent. You crack me up....!!

PS: I take this post to be confessional...

I guess I'd ask myself why would you have the surgery if you are considering or have already gone against what they tell you? You can split your little pouch open and have a much bigger mess on your hands, and as I recall even death if you don't take care of yourself ...or you could not lose any weight.

These questions are tough to hear for me, because I took so much time to get my head right before this surgery.

My program required 1 psychology session that lasted an hour. That will NEVER be enough for people with food addiction issues imo.

I took a year, and worked on food addiction issues with a therapist twice a month, before I even had surgery. I still, 9.5 months out have no real hunger to speak of. Neither should anyone. According to my surgeon. Any hunger you are feeling is head hunger and that's something you need to work out with yourself, and a therapist.

Of course, just my opinion, but you asked, we will all answer, honestly, I assume.

That you're worried is a VERY good sign, it means you can still get therapy to make sure this surgery works for you.

I have to ask, though I realize you probably don't really know the real answer, but why in the hell would you do that?

You've got a whole buncha people on here shaking their heads, wondering the same thing.

I'm 100% with you on this one. @@pedro Valle-Iclan.

This is a scary disease that got us here, people are people, they get easily startled.

People can say we are browbeating, but going along with someone and saying "It's ok" is why so many of us ended up like we did in the first place. Be accountable!

I spent basically my entire life thinking the way to comfort myself was food. When I was a little girl, I would come home from school crying, because the kids were making fun of me because I was fat. Know what my mom did? She gave me oreo Cookies to comfort me, or a donut, or a twinkie, or a piece of cake.

I don't give a hoot if I'm considered popular or not here, I'm so over the popularity contest here. If you ask a question you're going to get an honest answer and opinion. That's all it is though....MY opinion, entitled to it, just as everyone else is to their own.

Why have the surgery if you start cheating after losing what...18 lbs? Makes no sense to me at all. You have a hell of a long way to go. I'd get into therapy immediately, especially before you rip that tiny stomach open.

*still shaking my head*

P.S. I got set straight by a regular, that this is NOT a support group, when I first started coming here. I don't treat it as such since that time.

You find one thread out of many hundreds unacceptable and you dismiss the entire site? Well, ok then, but that fact and your shaming of everyone sort of exposes your own intolerance.

The sleeve is whole different deal, you don't have a NEW stomach created , so why not? I was scared to death to cause any damage to the new healing stomach.

>

>Whoa!! No, I misunderstood the surgery!! I thought sleeve was just a plastic sleeve "slid" over the stomach, like a more sophisticated band... oops..

I have read and re-read this thread several times in hope of reading something, --anything positive posted from the above posters that I am responding to. Instead, all I have read is ridicule, sarcasm, and defamation---oh, and ignorance.

He doesn't perform sleeve so it wasn't really discussed. I had a RNY

BP IS a support group. We are here to support one another, and hopefully advice through our own bumps in the road.

Can you not read the call for help from the original poster? She is asking for help, not for your venom, and that is all I am feeling--venom being spewed onto a questioning, stunned victim.

If you are ignorant about the different WLS, please, do NOT post as if you do. That does more harm than good.--and speaking so, makes you appear arrogant and quite "stupid".

Leave the advice giving to those who have knowledge and heart to speak of such things.

Please,Please: "If you can't improve upon the silence--don't"

To the original poster:

Please, do not judge this group by the two posters that I am responding to. BP as a whole is a marvelous group of caring people who want nothing more than to help you to succeed in your journey. You may need some "turn about" guidance, but even then it will be done in a caring and heartfelt way.

Try reposting your question in a few days, maybe rephrasing it a wee bit. --Don't give the "negative nuggies" any ammo to fire at you.

In the meantime, call your surgeon's office or your NUT and ask their advice. They will be able to guide you and get you back on the correct path .

Prayers going up for you.

We are entitled to our own opinions. I also said, I was set straight by a regular a long time ago, and told this is NOT a support group. It's a forum. I treat it as such, and I answer honestly, and do not give excuses, allow victimization, or tell people it's ok if they cheat, in fact it is NOT OK. Sorry, but that's how so many of us got fat to begin with. I even gave an example of what my mother did to me as a child to help me associate comfort with food. We are addicts, admitting that is the first step. We didn't get fat because we looked at a piece of pie or passed up a cupcake. I'm realistic. I'm tougher on myself than anyone else, but I've also lost 142 lbs in under 10 months. You talk of how we are shaming? Point that finger back to yourself. You're doing it too. Only my shaming might wake her up, so she stops killing herself. What is your shaming helping?

Thank you for sharing this!

You are inspirational and give such hope.

I'm on my way to losing almost 200 too, I'm sure when I am done, I'll surpass that myself.

This is a scary disease that got us here, people are people, they get easily startled.

I'm 100% with you on this one. @@pedro Valle-Iclan.

People can say we are browbeating, but going along with someone and saying "It's ok" is why so many of us ended up like we did in the first place. Be accountable!

I spent basically my entire life thinking the way to comfort myself was food. When I was a little girl, I would come home from school crying, because the kids were making fun of me because I was fat. Know what my mom did? She gave me oreo Cookies to comfort me, or a donut, or a twinkie, or a piece of cake.

I don't give a hoot if I'm considered popular or not here, I'm so over the popularity contest here. If you ask a question you're going to get an honest answer and opinion. That's all it is though....MY opinion, entitled to it, just as everyone else is to their own.

Why have the surgery if you start cheating after losing what...18 lbs? Makes no sense to me at all. You have a hell of a long way to go. I'd get into therapy immediately, especially before you rip that tiny stomach open.

*still shaking my head*

P.S. I got set straight by a regular, that this is NOT a support group, when I first started coming here. I don't treat it as such since that time.

I guess I'd ask myself why would you have the surgery if you are considering or have already gone against what they tell you? You can split your little pouch open and have a much bigger mess on your hands, and as I recall even death if you don't take care of yourself ...or you could not lose any weight.

These questions are tough to hear for me, because I took so much time to get my head right before this surgery.

My program required 1 psychology session that lasted an hour. That will NEVER be enough for people with food addiction issues imo.

I took a year, and worked on food addiction issues with a therapist twice a month, before I even had surgery. I still, 9.5 months out have no real hunger to speak of. Neither should anyone. According to my surgeon. Any hunger you are feeling is head hunger and that's something you need to work out with yourself, and a therapist.

Of course, just my opinion, but you asked, we will all answer, honestly, I assume.

I'm taking Biotin too, but other than a little new peach fuzz, growth which will literally take a year or likely a few more years to grow into anything, I ordered 5 more wigs, just to be safe. I'm actually loving this idea of changing not only hairstyles but colors on a whim. So I am making a negative into a positive on this one. My nails and skin are also taking a beating.

Try different temperatures of Water, even warm. I used to drink ice Water all the time pre-surgery. Now I can only do room temp or hot water. I drink A LOT of herbal tea. Warm feels good in my stomach. Omeprazole shouldn't make your stomach hurt more, it's supposed to make it better.

If you keep hurting, call the surgeon or the bariatric nurses, or hotline...that is what they are there for. I have a 24 hour hotline I can call with my program. If it's that bad, you can also go to the emergency room. You don't want to dehydrate.

I get asked this question all the time, and my response is always the same, and always true and honest.

I am very particular about who I keep company with.

End of story, that's all they need to know and I agree with OutsideMatchInside.

I believe that's someone with low self esteem or self worth, too.

I have noticed people acting differently toward me. Overall, people seem to be nicer to me. As I live in a very small town, this is much more noticeable, where people wouldn't speak to me at all before, now they do. You know, people who work at the grocery store for instance, or local businesses.

I have noticed as well, that I have more men just out of the blue, in passing, say hello to me, ask me how I am, and look me in the eyes, hold doors for me, smile at me. You would think this would be something to be happy about. This all actually makes me sad. I don't understand, because I am the same person I was before I lost all this weight. I suppose that it does come down to physical attraction, and I have always been hyper aware of just how unattractive fat is to some people, many people, in fact. Me, I never based any relationship on how a person looked. Who they are, is so much more important to me.

My family is a different story. They started out very supportive, and as I lose more and fit into smaller and smaller sizes, I am feeling the little barbs shoot at me, from some of my sisters. About loose skin, and wrinkles. I can only chalk that up to some type of jealousy. I am perplexed by this. As I was counting on my family for full support. I also notice that some friends are getting tired of hearing my "updates" and that I lost more weight. Or that I can do things I never have before, like cross my legs. For me, I'm just amazed...and it's a whole new world for me, as I have been big my entire life. I think it's a miracle that I can cross my legs, as an adult I haven't been able to. I'm 50 years old, and could never cross my legs as an adult. So to me it really is a whole new world, and I'm excited, I actually feel like a lady now.

I'll have to see how this progresses. One thing I do know, is that I am even MORE protective of people who are being made fun of because of their weight. I'm not like an ex-smoker who goes around bad mouthing everyone who smokes. I'm not a fat shamer, as I know exactly what it feels like to be out of control, and miserable in your own skin. I also know everyone has to come to terms with their weight in their own way, and time. Or not. It is not my job, or my business telling others they "need" to lose weight.

No takers yet.

You can make me an offer. I'll leave this up another week.

It's been interesting reading through what people's fears are.

None of these things did I consider fears....and I knew some could happen, others, I had no idea, and they have.

I can tell you, I'm at the I just bought a wig part of the program...because I've lost that much hair.

My cardiologist is considering putting a pacemaker in me, because my heart rate is so low, and I have bradycardia now, since my surgery. I was NOT even aware that this could happen. I've lost so much weight, so fast, that they say my heart just slowed down, as it didn't have to work so hard, but it slowed down too much. They are getting heart rate measurements in the low 30's when I sleep, and mid 50's when I am active. I am so dizzy and feel faint all the time, and exhausted.

I cannot describe to you the loose skin issue. It's horrific. Keep in mind, I have been for the most part, morbidly obese my entire life, I am 50, and I had many many years of stretching out my skin, and abusing that skin of mine. I have gone from a full C cup to a small B cup, and I still have 61 lbs. to goal, (150) which will be a 195 lb weight loss. Then i'd like to lose a bit more, since I am so short. Although to be honest the smallest weight I can remember on me is 179 in 7th grade. I'll probably be an A cup when all is said and done. My insurance won't cover a boob job. I know that, or arms. I have batwings. I should be able to get thighs and belly done.

All these things...horrific in and of themselves. My main fear is still... getting to my goal. Or that 'losing window' closing on me, before my goal is met. I could care less about food now, and I love ....no I seriously mean it... I LOVE that food holds no interest to me anymore. I don't really fear regaining. I eat because I have to. I don't even want to, I have to.

Thanks everyone for sharing....it helps I think, to be open, and honest and real. These fears we have are not without merit or reason.

I love Yoplait Greek 100

12 g Protein - 100 Calories - 12 g Carbs

It's the best tasting to me. My favorites are: banana Caramel, Caramel Apple, Apple Pie, strawberry Cheesecake, Key Lime Pie, Blackberry Pie, Boston Creme Pie.

I usuallly eat one a day. I eat half in the morning, and half at night.

So goodl

My biggest fear is that I will stop losing before I hit my goal, that my window of opportunity to lose easily will disappear before I get to my goal. Despite following my plan. I don't know how long that window is open.

I don't cheat, I have no need to, I still don't even have physical hunger and I'd be fine if that remained that way forever. I planned very well, and had a year of therapy for food addiction issues before surgery, so I don't have head hunger.

Still...

I had a month long stall at the 8 month mark of my journey that got me so anxious. I've started to lose again, thank goodness, but I still have 63 lbs to get to goal, and man, do I want it bad.

I have had so many setbacks where exercise is concerned from a bone on bone knee that needs replacement but has been put on the back burner because I just had an emergency unexpected major surgery. Other than a little core strengthening, and some stretching, I can't exercise, or even walk without a walker. I have a tough 6 weeks ahead of me, and a 10 lb lifting limit. It's discouraging, but I keep sticking to my plan and hoping I will keep losing. I've lost 132 lbs so far, without any real exercise. I'm so close, I can even see the finish line in the distance, I just need to make it there!

So now you know..my biggest fear.

Wow, this was actually really helpful. I never heard it explained like this before. Thanks so much for sharing.

I just bought my first wig.

I had thin hair to begin with, due to poly cystic ovarian disorder, and bypass did me in. I lost so much hair. I have to do this ridiculous comb over thing, and I finally said enough...

So I JUST got the wig a few days ago, and I am trying to get used to it. I'm scared to wear it out, but at the same time excited, it looks good on me. I'm going to trim it a bit, it's a little long. I already have 4 more wigs in a shopping cart, and continue to look. Here's the great thing for me, I love having different colors mixed in with my black hair..pinks, reds, purples,blues etc. I'm finding wigs like that, so that's great. I can finally have platinum blonde hair, without the hassle of trying to bleach it from black to white. Believe me I've done it....it's not easy. This way it's as simple as can be.

Now if I can just get brave that first time and wear my wig out in public. All I need to do is get over that first time out.

I'm taking Biotin too, and I am noticing new growth. There is hope!

I hope you find the right solution for you!

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I had gastric bypass surgery exactly 7 months and 1 day ago. I started out at 345 lbs. I have lost 123 lbs so far. 72lbs to goal. That seems nothing in comparison to what I have done already. The major key to my success has been that I did on my own, extensive therapy work on food addiction issues. Without that, I would have failed already. I know me.

I'm off all my diabetes meds, and off all insulins. I am no longer considered diabetic.

I was taken off my cholesterol meds, and passed the 3 month mark, with flying colors, no need to resume those!

I was even taken off one of my heart meds because my blood pressure is completely normal now.

I think you have to make the choice that is best for you, and what is best for you depends on what you are dealing with before the surgery I needed to lose 195 lbs, and have severe GERD, so the clear choice for me was bypass, as you lose more on it, and sleeve can cause or make worse, GERD, my surgeon said. In fact had I not had complications he wanted to do a "Low limb" bypass, he couldn't however, as I had some pretty serious complications, during the surgery. But that would have had me losing even more, faster. I'm absolutely excited with my progress. Considering I have had nearly no ability to exercise, other than core strengthening since surgery, due to a badly infected toe I have been dealing with from a botched podiatrist treatment in July. I wonder how much more I could lose if I could walk daily! I'm getting better though, so watch out! Soon as I can get back on that treadmill things are going to change more!

I have absolutely no hunger still, I won't lie, I still have a struggle getting in my daily Protein and for sure my calories! But I do my best, and I get in my fluids. I don't have head hunger issues, as I have done so much work on that, and continue to, I do however keep finding myself wanting to go back to smoking, which I have quit almost 2 years ago. So watch out for those transfer addictions.. I can see how easily that could happen now!

Research, and see what is best for you. Ask your surgeon what is best for you, and take all your pre-existing conditions into account. The right answer will come.

As for those who say dumping happens to all bypass patients. That is not true. I haven't had that happen in 7 months. I also put nothing in my body that would cause that. Mal-absorption is also what helps us to lose, I still write down everything I eat and drink , and follow my program very closely. You get out of it what you put into it, I think.

Good luck with you! I know you'll figure it out. I think we all went through this. The answer will come!

You are a rock star!

Wow!

You've worked so hard at all angles and very single issue! Anyrhing that has come at you - you fought back and conquered! You are a true true inspiration and let us all learn a little something extra from you!

You should take a very proud bow my friend, for you are what we all try to be or achieve or become!

Just wow!

Also, good read and information you provided. All good points.

I am 3.5 months post op and have never dumped. I haven't put anything in my body to even have that chance of that happening. I'm no saying that I never will because I am human and I'm sure I will sometime down the road.

Thank you so much, for your kind words! I appreciate it. I'm sorry it took so long to respond to your post. I don't come here too often anymore. I just wanted to thank you, and wish you well on your journey. You're going to be great! I can tell by your attitude!

I had gastric bypass surgery exactly 7 months and 1 day ago. I started out at 345 lbs. I have lost 123 lbs so far. 72lbs to goal. That seems nothing in comparison to what I have done already. The major key to my success has been that I did on my own, extensive therapy work on food addiction issues. Without that, I would have failed already. I know me.

I'm off all my diabetes meds, and off all insulins. I am no longer considered diabetic.

I was taken off my cholesterol meds, and passed the 3 month mark, with flying colors, no need to resume those!

I was even taken off one of my heart meds because my blood pressure is completely normal now.

I think you have to make the choice that is best for you, and what is best for you depends on what you are dealing with before the surgery I needed to lose 195 lbs, and have severe GERD, so the clear choice for me was bypass, as you lose more on it, and sleeve can cause or make worse, GERD, my surgeon said. In fact had I not had complications he wanted to do a "Low limb" bypass, he couldn't however, as I had some pretty serious complications, during the surgery. But that would have had me losing even more, faster. I'm absolutely excited with my progress. Considering I have had nearly no ability to exercise, other than core strengthening since surgery, due to a badly infected toe I have been dealing with from a botched podiatrist treatment in July. I wonder how much more I could lose if I could walk daily! I'm getting better though, so watch out! Soon as I can get back on that treadmill things are going to change more!

I have absolutely no hunger still, I won't lie, I still have a struggle getting in my daily Protein and for sure my calories! But I do my best, and I get in my fluids. I don't have head hunger issues, as I have done so much work on that, and continue to, I do however keep finding myself wanting to go back to smoking, which I have quit almost 2 years ago. So watch out for those transfer addictions.. I can see how easily that could happen now!

Research, and see what is best for you. Ask your surgeon what is best for you, and take all your pre-existing conditions into account. The right answer will come.

As for those who say dumping happens to all bypass patients. That is not true. I haven't had that happen in 7 months. I also put nothing in my body that would cause that. Mal-absorption is also what helps us to lose, I still write down everything I eat and drink , and follow my program very closely. You get out of it what you put into it, I think.

Good luck with you! I know you'll figure it out. I think we all went through this. The answer will come!

@@Inner Surfer Girl ummmm ok.

Essential oil and diffuser user here too!

@@katybelle7 I'm right there with you. It's always about $, sadly. As someone clearly stated in an earlier post, this is not a support group. That's quite evident to me now.

Believe me, everyone is or was talking about us too just like that and worse....

If you're too fat, if you've made great strides to lose, if you look like hell or fantastic...people just love to talk. I generally think the worst offenders are those who have nothing better going on in their lives or who lead miserable lives. They spend extraordinary amounts of time gossiping, talking, etc.

As it is, I do have something better going on...off to Open Mic, to host, and to sing!

I'm sorry about your co-worker. Someday maybe we'll be judged more about who we are as people, not how we look.

You do have to sadly, be careful who you share things with. I naturally expected the support of my entire family. I did not get that, initially. I think now they are seeing serious results and changing their minds, and some of my family are very supportive, which I am so grateful for.

You would think, people who love you...family, friends, would be happier for you, or more supportive, or even know how to act, and not ask such private questions.

One of my sisters who in all other aspects has been extremely supportive, said to me the other day...."Get ready for the wrinkles!" I was confused. I asked what she meant. She was referring to my face and losing weight and sagging wrinkly double chins, and face skin etc. Now, I know I am going to be 50 in November, but I actually have pretty good facial skin. I thought for awhile....as I sat there, wow, that was mean. Then I got bold and told her that it was mean, and to mind her own wrinkles, and with her fair skin I can see them even more, and from a distance. LOL Sisters! She had to know I was going to give it back to her.

I'm learning to get bolder, and stick up for myself more, that's for sure!

I haven't had any plastics, but I have had a drain before. It's kinda' icky to see it/think of it, but it never hurt, and of course I didn't have to empty it, because I was in the hospital. I think I could have done it on my own though.

Very good points, everyone. I changed my name, and deleted all my photos. I changed/deleted a lot of my private information. I'm hoping to find a way to actually delete some of my old posts. I haven't figured that out yet. If anyone knows how I can delete all previous posts, I'd appreciate the information.

I don't normally have to worry about this privacy issue, because I nearly exclusively speak on voice, in all the places I am online. So there is no trail left behind, unless someone records what is being said. Which is usually always against TOS. Honestly, typing is so 1999. I haven't used a forum in many years! Which makes sense why I didn't think of my privacy.

I'll come back for information, if necessary, and keep track of my progress. It was nice to get to know some of you. I'm going to try to find a WLS support voice group. If I can't find one, I'll start one of my own! I'm industrious like that.

I appreciate this place for all the support I actually did get here. I was lucky to have the help I got when I needed it the most.

@ I agree. That does not seem like a support group to me, either. I pay for enough services online already. I assumed, foolishly, that this place would have been private. I have loved the group too, but unfortunately, there is always a price.

I'll take my responsibility for not checking.

I've been a member here a year now, and honestly, I think I got this. Any other help I really need, can come from my support team (NP, NUT, Therapist etc.) they do keep my information confidential.

The question is....if I delete my account will all my posts go with it? Or, do I have to manually delete each post, Thank goodness it's just 282 and not thousands!

This might be The Universe's way of telling me to get off my butt, and off the computer, and move on with life!