bbanded

Sunwyse, Hi. I was banded about 8 months ago, and it is true that I am moodier than ever, but I feel as though the depression I felt reight after surgery has lifted. I think it is common because when I go to get my fills they have me answer a questionnaire and there are 4 or 5 questions on moods and depression on there. I do not currently see a therapist, but at the suggestion of fellow bandsters will look into finding one soon because I definately think that helps. I also need to start attending the support groups that my surgeon/hospital have. I am lucky that my sister had the band done 2 months ago so we are great support for one another. I sure saw her depression and moodiness after the surgery!!! That is getting better, she is on effexor and she may have upped her dose. I consider my getting the band a life changing event. It is similar to me to when I quit drinking alcohol and using drugs 15 yrs. ago. I was ready to be this happy, straight, RICH, and without depression. My mother simply told me..."I don't mean to burst your bubble, but you weren't a whole lot of fun to be around BEFORE you started drinking!!!" (My mother doesn't mess around, she says what she wants to!) I was shocked and thought thanks a lot mom! But she was absolutely right. Just because I was sober did not make me happy rich or not depressed. I just did everything minus the hangover! I guess my point is just that I have to learn to accept and love myself the way I am. Everyday I will have to learn it again. Good luck learning to love yourself today! bbanded

My life is overwhelming. I read post after post here and get a minute of relief or a stab of consideration for everyone who has gone through tough times. I know in my heart that I have much to be thankful for. But I am so tired of the fight! My whole life I have not cared whether I lived or died. I drank, smoked, did drugs, broke laws, ate to die, and was ready to go at anytime. Then I had my kids (3 natural, 2 step) and I quit everything risky. I got this band and for the first time I said aloud, "I want to live longer". I am setting myself up to live a longer life, but mentally I don't know if I can do it. I know this is depression talking. I am on meds and have been for years. I have the most supportive family and friends. I work at a mental health clinic so I get to talk with specialists all day everyday. I am still in a funk and it's lasted prob. 30 of my 38 years. I'm tired of it. I will have to pick myself up by the bootstraps and kick this bout of the downers, but this morning it seems like too much work. Maybe I should quit kicking myself, put a smile on, and go help some people who really have problems!!! EXACTAMONDO...see you around, fellow bandsters.ps-this whining might be due to my fill app't. tomorrow & the fact that I have not lost an ounce since my last fill 2 months ago!! (whoops!!)bbanded (begin 235 lb. current 205 lb. goal 145 lb.)

Thank you Sunwyse and bayougirl for sharing, it is getting a bit freaky in this forum that more people who have the issues with obesity and self esteem issues have been molested years ago. I guess it was apparent in my message that I am suffering. I was molested by nearly every male (and some females) in my family beginning at age 4 to 24. It was such a huge part of my life that I normalized it and didn't even consider myself a victim until I remarried and my wonderful husband put the pieces of my scattered puzzle of a life together and set me straight. I remember him saying all the time, "That's Not Normal!" And I finally believed him. Then I had a nervous breakdown over it! I ended up in the nut hut on a 72 hour hold and THAT changed my life!!! I learned I had PTSD and I learned IT WASN'T MY FAULT!!!That was 4 years ago and it has been a slow climb outta the hole of depression I had dug for myself. I still jump in there from time to time but at least I'm not trying to fill it in with me in it anymore!!!! The overeating, exercising, lapband, and sliming are really the least of my worries. They are a great distraction though!!! Now I just have to quit using my past as a reason not to live. Thank you all for reminding me of what is REALLY important. Hope you all have a good day! bbanded

thanks,nanook. I think you are right on the mark! Ever since I've been banded it seems that my moods are more irratic. My family is so forgiving (enabling?!?!) of my manic times and my down times that I don't deal with it. I will do everyone the favor and check it out w/ my doc! I am feeling better today, even though the day is grey & rainy. I am looking forward to my fill and not being hungry for awhile. Thanks for the caring words, I know that the band is a miracle, and I have to work on the rest!!! bbanded

thank you, sherry, for your wise words! You sound like you got the jist of my message. It is true that although I work around the smartest docs I don't see a therapist for me. I will look into setting up an app't. and begin working towards a better outlook instead of looking for a quik fix. (I know from experience that this does not work!) I think by writing instead of just reading on this forum I will be forced to deal with my moods instead of acknowledge and dismiss! Thanks again for holding me responsible for me!bbanded

I took Effexor for a few years and when I tried to switch and weaned off (not slowly enough) I thought I was dying! I was sooo dizzy and I honestly thought I was going to die. Eventually, the symptoms stopped. I also got depressed after surgery, although I was on and still take Cymbalta. I read that divorce is sky high (way higher percentile) in people after WLS. I was thisclose to divorcing a couple months ago. There is a huge change in everything about me since the surgery, I think. Chemically, moodwise, personality-wise, everything. Luckily, my family and friends are very supportive and patient with me!!!