Inner Surfer Girl

Welcome. This is a great question and you have come to the right place. I was completely against the idea of surgery for a very long time but was at the end of my rope. My PCP encouraged me to consider WLS and suggested I at least learn enough about it to make an informed decision. He referred me to an awesome Bariatric Surgeon. The more I learned and the further along in the process I went, the more I knew this was the right decision for me. I went from 110% against the idea to eagerly ready to do it. I was sleeved April 20, 2015 and couldn't be happier with my surgery, my recovery, and my progress so far. I am healthier and happier than I have been in a very long time. I started at almost 600 pounds, practically immobile, and on disability. I am over halfway to goal, getting my life back, and getting ready to return to the workforce. I swim regularly and am no longer effectively housebound. Best of luck with your decision. The good thing is that you don't have to make any major decisions today. But, I encourage you to take the next step and at least attend a seminar with an open mind. I encourage you to find a good Bariatric Center of Excellence. They should have a good process so that you will be fully informed and educated and have the support and tools to be successful no matter what you decide. Keep us posted on how you are doing.

If you know this about yourself, then what are you doing to change this? Are you working with a therapist? Are you attending support groups?

Welcome and best of luck with your surgery. I am a fairly private person. I am open one-on-on with people individually, but I haven't/don't talk about my WLS on social media.

How can your stomach hold 16 oz. All at once?? Sent from my LGMS631 using the BariatricPal App Once the swelling starts going down you can drink more. Our stomachs don't hold 16 oz of Fluid at once but since liquid drains through the stomach quickly the liquid doesn't stay in the stomach.

I have found high potency Vitamins can be difficult to take at the best of times. I certainly can't take them on an empty stomach. I have found better results taking a regular Multivitamin and then individual supplements throughout the day. Trying to combine all my vitamins in one pill is a recipe for disaster for me. My surgeon gave me a recommended supplement list and recommended schedule.

Here is a link to the same article on a different website: http://anniewrightpsychotherapy.com/2016/03/101-suggestions-for-taking-care-of-yourself-when-it-all-feels-like-too-much/

Here are the 101 things from the article: 101 Suggestions for Self-Care. Have a good, long, body-shaking cry. Call a trusted friend or family member and talk it out. Call in sick. Take comp time if you can. Take a mental health day. Say NO to extra obligations, chores, or anything that pulls on your precious self care time. Book a session (or more!) with your therapist. Dial down your expectations of yourself at this time. When you’re going through life’s tough times, I invite you to soften your expectations of yourself and others. Tuck yourself into bed early with a good book and clean sheets. Watch a comforting/silly/funny/lighthearted TV show or movie. (Parks and Recreation, anyone?) Reread your favorite picture and chapter books from childhood. Ask for some love and tenderness from your friends on social media. Let them comment on your post and remind you that you’re loved. Look at some some really gorgeous pieces of art. Watch Youtube videos of Ellen DeGeneres and the adorable kids she has on her show. Look at faith-in-humanity-restoring lists from Buzzfeed. ASK FOR HELP. From whoever you need it – your boss, your doctor, your partner, your therapist, your mom. Let people know you need some help. Wrap yourself up in a cozy fleece blanket and sip a cup of hot tea. BREATHE. Deeply. Slowly. Four counts in. Six counts out. HYDRATE. Have you had enough Water today? EAT. Have you eaten something healthy and nourishing today? sleep. Have you slept 7-9 hours? Is it time for some rest? SHOWER. Then dry your hair and put on clothes that make you feel good. Go outside and be in the sunshine. Move your body gently in ways that feel good. Maybe aim for 30 minutes. Or 10 if 30 feels like too much. Read a story (or stories) of people who overcame adversity or maybe dealt with mental illness, too. (I personally admire JK Rowling’s story.) Go to a 12-Step meeting. Or any group meeting where support is offered. Check out church listings, hospital listings, school listings for examples. If you suspect something may be physiologically off with you, go see your doctor and/or psychiatrist and talk to them. Medication might help you at this time and they can assist you in assessing this. Take a long, hot bath, light a candle, and pamper yourself. Read these inspirational quotes. Cuddle someone or something. Your partner. A pillow. Your friend’s dog. Read past emails/postcards/letters etc from friends and family reminding you of happier times. Knit. Sculpt. Bake. Engage your hands. Exhaust yourself physically – running, yoga, swimming, whatever helps you feel fatigued. Write it out. Free form in a journal or a Google doc. Get it all out and VENT. Create a plan if you’re feeling overwhelmed. List out what you need to do next to tackle and address whatever you’re facing. Chunk it down into manageable and understandable pieces. REMEMBER: You only have to get through the next five minutes. Then the next five. And so on. Take five minutes to meditate. Write out a list of 25 Reasons Why You’ll Be Okay. Write out a list of 25 Examples of Things You’ve Overcome or Accomplished. Write out a list of 25 Reasons Why You’re a Good, Loveable Person. Write out a list of 25 Things That Makes Your Life Beautiful. Sniff some scents that bring you joy or remind you of happier times. Ask for support from friends and family via text if voice-to-voice contact feels like too much. Ask them to check in with you via text daily/weekly. Whatever you need. Lay down on the ground. Let the earth/floor hold you. You don’t have to hold it all on your own. Clean up a corner of a room of your house. Sometimes tidying up can help calm our minds. Ask yourself: What’s my next most immediate priority? Do that. Then ask the question again. Read some poetry. Rumi, Hafiz, Mary Oliver are all excellent. Take a tech break. Delete or deactivate social media if it feels too triggering right now. Or maybe get on tech. If you’ve been isolating maybe even interacting with friends and family online might feel good. Go out in public and be around others. You don’t have to engage. But maybe go sit in a coffee shop or on a bench at a museum and soak up the humanity around you. Or if you’re feeling too saturated with contact, go home. Cancel plans and tend to the introverted parts of yourself. Ask friends and family to remind you that things will be okay and that what you’re feeling is temporary. Put up some Christmas lights in your bedroom. They often make things more magical. Spend a little money and treat yourself to some self-care and comfort. Maybe take a taxi versus the bus. Buy your lunch instead of forcing yourself to pack it. Buy some flowers that delight you. MAKE ART. Scribble with crayons. Splash some watercolors. Paint a rock. Whatever. Just create something. Go wander around outside in your neighborhood and take a look at all the lovely houses and the way people decorate their gardens. Delight in the diversity of design. Go visit or volunteer at your local SPCA. Pet some animals. Look at photos of people you love. Set them as the wallpaper of your phone or laptop. Create and listen to a playlist of songs that remind you of happier times. Read some spiritual literature. Scream, pound pillows, tear up paper, shake your body to move the energy out. Eat your favorite, most comforting foods. Watch old Mr. Rogers’ Neighborhood videos online. Turn off the lights, sit down, stare into space, and do absolutely nothing. Pick one or two things that feel like progress and do them. Make your bed. Put away the dishes. Return an email. Go to a church or spiritual community service. Sit among others and absorb any guidance or grace that feels good to you. Allow yourself to fantasize about what you’re hoping or longing for. There are clues and energy in your reveries and daydreams that are worth paying attention to. Watch ASMR videos to help you calm down and fall asleep at night. Listen to monks chanting, singing Tibetan bowls, or nature sounds to help soothe you. Color in some adult coloring books. Revisit an old hobby. Even if it feels a little forced, try your hand at things you used to enjoy and see what comes up for you. Go to the ocean. Soak up the negative ions. Go to the mountains. Absorb the strength and security of them. Go to the forest. Drink in the shelter, life, and sacredness of the trees. Put down the personal help books and pick up some good old fashioned fiction. Remember: Your only job right now is to put one foot in front of the other. Allow and feel and express your feelings – all of them! – safely and appropriately. Seek out help if you need support in this. Listen to sad songs or watch sad movies if you need a good cry. (Steel Magnolias, anyone?) Dance around wildly to your favorite, most cheesy songs from your high school years. Put your hands in dirt. If you have a garden, go garden. If you have some indoor plants, tend to them. If you don’t have plants or a garden, go outside. Go to a local nursery and touch and smell all the gorgeous plants. If you want to stay in bed all day watching Netflix, do it. Indulge. Watch or listen to some comedy shows or goofy podcasts. Look for and Google up examples of people who have gone through and made it through what you’re currently facing. Seek out models of inspiration. Get expert help with whatever you need. Whether that’s through therapy, psychiatry, a lawyer, clergy, let those trained to support you do it. Educate yourself about what you’re going through. Learn about what you’re facing, what you can expect to feel, and how you can support yourself in this place. Establish a routine and stick to it. Routines can bring so much comfort and grounding in times of life that feel chaotic or out of control. Do some hardcore nesting and make your home or bedroom as cozy and beautiful and comforting as possible. Get up early and watch a sunrise. Go outside and set up a chair and watch the sunset. Make your own list of self-soothing activities that engage all five of your senses. Develop a supportive morning ritual for yourself. Develop a relaxing evening ritual for yourself. Join a support group for people who are going through what you’re going through. Check out the listings at local hospitals, libraries, churches, and universities to see what’s out there. Volunteer at a local shelter or hospital or nursing home. Practice being of service to others who may also be going through a tough time. Accompany a friend or family member to something. Even if it’s just keeping them company while they run errands, sometimes this kind of contact can feel like good self-care. Take your dog for a walk. Or borrow a friend’s dog and take them for a walk. Challenge your negative thinking. For more tips on this check out tool #2 in my recent blog post. Practice grounding, relaxation techniques. See tool #1 of this recent blog post. Do something spontaneous. Walk or drive a different way to work. Order something new off the menu. Listen to a Spotify playlist of new songs. Work with your doctor, naturopath, or nutritionist to develop a physical exercise plan and food plan that will be supportive to whatever you’re facing right now. Pray. Meditate. Write a letter to God/The Universe/Source/Your Higher Self, whatever you believe in. As much as you can, please try and trust the process. Finally, please remember, what you’re going through right now is temporary. It may not feel like that from inside the tough time you’re in, but this too shall pass and you will feel different again someday. If you can’t have faith in that, let me hold the hope for you.

Welcome! Best of luck with your surgery. It is quite a process but well worth it. Take this time pre-op to learn as much as you can. Ask lots of questions and write everything down. Your surgeon can help you determine which procedure is best for you. I am so sorry your mother is so awful to you. If I had to guess, she may not change when you lose weight. If she is so insecure and behaves badly toward you now, she may just find something else to focus on once you lose weight. It sounds like it is about her anyway. Do you have a good therapist? It may be helpful to have someone objective who can help you work through your issues around food and sort out what you can change and what how to respond to your mother's issues in a healthy way.

Mexican

What I meant is that even with Google, the article isn't loading on the website. I don't think it's this app, I think it is a problem with the original link/website.

This doesn't sound bariatric friendly at all. If you must drink a Protein Shake, look for something like Premier Protein (30 grams protein). If you google Bariatric Center of Excellence manual, you will find some examples of program manuals.

If you are exercising a lot, you may not be eating enough. Also, 65 grams of protein seems really low. My surgeon's lowest recommendation is 80 grams and is mostly 100 grams. What does your NUT suggest? Embrace the Stall http://BariatricPal.com/index.php?/topic/351046-Embrace-the-Stall

Are you tracking your food/protein at all?

Do you have a protein target? Mine is 100 grams a day. My surgeon's guidelines are: 100 grams a day for all men and anyone with a starting BMI of over 50. For all women with a starting BMI of under 50 the target is 80 grams. Look at the label for your Shakeology. What does it say about protein, carbs, and sugar?

Why Shakeology? Is that approved by your program. My understanding is that it is high in carbs. Getting enough water and Protein is critical for weight loss and health. Since you are 5 months out you should be able to get most, if not all, of your protein from food. How are you doing at getting in all of your protein? What does your NUT advise? Embrace the Stall http://BariatricPal.com/index.php?/topic/351046-Embrace-the-Stall

I am too private!

Frankly, without knowing what you are doing it is impossible for us to know what you might be doing "wrong" if anything. Are you: following your program? Tracking your food? Getting at least 64 oz Fluid? Reaching your Protein target daily? (What is your protein target?) Avoiding added sugars (especially high fructose corn syrup), starches, and fried foods? Eating mindfully? Taking your Vitamins and supplements as directed? Exercising? Embrace the Stall http://BariatricPal.com/index.php?/topic/351046-Embrace-the-Stall

Until you can get your calories up, "working out" may need to be on the back burner. Moderate exercise and walking should be plenty.

I did, but the link wasn't loading from Google.

I don't remember.

You may have to eat more frequently. A good way to up your calories is to add some good fats: avocado, Peanut Butter, etc.

How is losing 13 pounds in a month considered not losing weight? Embrace the Stall http://BariatricPal.com/index.php?/topic/351046-Embrace-the-Stall

Turkey, tuna, cheese, cruciferous and leafy green vegetables.

Absolutely. I started at a much higher BMI than you and am still at a higher BMI than you and I would do it again in a heartbeat.

For me, plain water was the hardest thing to drink early out. Have you tried adding crystal light, Mio drops, or other water enhancers to your water?