bandster_1007

i was banded on a thursday, and i went back to work on Tuesday, but i only lasted a half of a day. i took a couple of other half days over the next two weeks due to stabbing left side pain, but other than being really tired, i felt pretty good. this is absolutely no way i could have gone back to work the next day. i joke now, but i was in a catatonic state. i literally sat up on the couch all day with my head tilted to the side and my mouth open. occasionaly i would make some sane attempt to converse with the people around me, but it only made me appear more insane (i was drugged from the anestesia at the hospital..it has lingering effects).

Day of surgery weight: 223 One month post-op : 219 (a lot of water weight that day, i was really swolen, 212 is more like it) Pounds lost from surgery: 11 Calories at one month: i was counting the first 3 weeks and my calories were between 500 & 800. i stopped counting and i stopped losing. i also have not been working out the last two weeks. my first fill is tomorrow and i am getting back on track. __________________ <!-- google_ad_section_start(weight=ignore) -->

<p>yeah, i've been doing terrible.</p> <p> </p> <p>i haven't worked out in 2 weeks (1st week had a sick child, last week..no excuses). i haven't been logging my food. i get my first fill tomorrow.</p> <p> </p> <p>i'm revising my goal of items to do before December 27 (approx 2 months post op):</p> <p>1. go 3 whole days without any sugar or simple carbs</p> <p>2. work out 15 times at Curves</p> <p>3. log my food 25 out of 30 days.</p> <p>4. go on one family/friend outing that does not involve food. </p> <p>5. read a book (i used to love to read, but i'm not a big fan of fiction, and some of the non-fiction stuff is really dry, maybe i will find a self-help book for head hunger..lol)</p>

ok, i think this thread is dieing. that is probably for the better. thank you all for your posts. i really appreciate each opinion (no matter what the perspective was). this truly is an excellent forum for band related issues.

yeah, you are right, i should have put it in the rants and raves. i didn't think about that.

marieze, i appreciate your opinion. but, i am wondering if this post was so offensive, why are you still reading it. (i noticed that you are in the post right now). we all choose what we do, in our actions, our words, the material we choose to view or read. i'm intrigued that you felt a need to tell me how offensive my post was, but you are still reading it. (maybe you secretly like it:embarassed:) MWAAAHHAHAHAHAHA!! J/K. :heh:

i have to agree, intimacy is the true value of a relationship, not the sex. touch is vital.

you know, it is so different for men. us women, we have to go every year to be poked and protted and have a great big light on our personals. my dh was showing some symptoms that could have possibly been prostate related (not impotency), and he had to have an "exam". he could barely tell me about it. he was 27 when he had it done, and now he absolutely plans to never have it done again. he did say he was glad he had a female doctor with small fingers. i just find it so curious that it is SUCH big deal for them. i'm sorry that your dh can't get past that. my father in law (step) had prostate cancer and had to have it removed. he is now cancer free, but he was very embarrased. he didn't want anyone to know anything about his problem. i hope your husband can get past that somehow, not only for his health but for your relationship, it is sad that his fear has driven you two apart.

nytrink- that is exactly the case. he knows that he doesn't want his son treating his wife that way. he also knows that he doesn't want to treat me that way. sometimes, it just happens. we are both stressed and we don't deal with it well sometimes. majority of the time it is me. he is an easy going, always laughing kind of guy. i on the other hand am wound tighter than a spool of thread. i worry, nag, and complain constantly. i'm not downing myself, i'm being honest. the longer i am with him, the easier i find it to let go and laugh sometimes, and not be so serious all of the time. but, occasionally, i get to him, and he reacts by saying things that he doesn't mean. not to mention he isn't an emotional speaker. he's not very good at communicating effectively how he feels about things. he does communicate it, but i have to read between the lines. as someone else has mentioned, he is worried. he is scared that i will leave him after i lose weight. his is scared that this isn't going to work, and it will be an expensive "trial". he is worried that i will have complications and we will have to pay for it. he is worried that i will lose my job the beginning of the year due to absences having to do with my comorbidities. he is worried that i will not feel better even after i lose weight. he is worried that i will not follow program, and that i will not exercise. the last two worries are the ones that cause him to say dumb stuff. he loves to exercise. he loves it and it makes him feel better. so, he doesn't understand why i don't. it worries him that i never will, and he wants me to understand how healthy it is and how much better it makes you feel. so he will say things like, "you do nothing for your body"... anyways. i don't know what i expected when i posted this. it was more or less, i need to vent, and i need someone to be on my side. but then when people get on my side, i realize how i painted this horrible monster of a person that just really doesn't exist. thank you all for your posts. we obviously need to work on our communication, lately, and we are both aware of that. i know he is worried about my health and my self esteem, and so am i. kacee- "You guys desperately need to talk TO each other, not AT each other." Amen to that!!! and i am just as guilty as he is. it is so easy to forget how important it is to be your partner's friend. sometimes we just take advantage of the fact that they are there, and forget that they really are there. we've just had a bad month. we've been doing a lot of at'ing to each other, and i've been an emotional nightmare (with dealing with having my food friend taken from me all of a sudden).

lol..see that is what i said. i wish he would just tell me that he doesn't like the taste or something, if it even has a taste, i don't know. he may think that would be more offensive, but i would totally understand that. i am glad that i don't have to do that..hahahaha. i've tried to get him to admit that he just doesn't like to do it, and in the same sentence, explain to him that i'm not real fond of doing it to him either, but it is for the other person and sometimes you just have to suck it up (in my case literally) and do it.

this is so the case. this is one story out of many. it isn't a good example of what the norm is in our relationship. it is my one sided very biased interpretation of his actions. as i mentioned, i had definately been being a female dog. horribly, i would argue with everything he said, wouldn't want to touch him, etc. so i was not helping with the mood thing. i have to tell you what finally happened. we have been going about our days as normal, and i have not brought up the incident that happened the other night. actually the next morning whenever i got into bed, he made me remember how he acts when he wants me. he kissed me and held me, and well you know..rendezvous under the sheets. that was his way of letting me know that he is a butt. if he just comes out and says, "i'm sorry" then i debate with him. so i've still be pretty depressed and then when getting the responses on here i began to question my decision to be with him (all of my friends want what we have, and my family adores him..they know we have our differences, but we are a very committed honest couple, sometimes even too honest- as seen in this post). last night, i had to take our son to scouts. he was home with a bad back, but i had expressed to him that i wish he felt better so he could take him, so i could put up the tree (didn't do it yet-migraines). so i agreed that tonight when he takes him to bb practice, i was going to stay home and put up the tree. when i got home he had decorated the entire house with christmas decorations :faint:. i went directly in the bedroom and hugged him and cried. he knew that i was sorry for the way i had been acting, and he was letting me know how much he cares. i know that seems dumb, but that is how it is with us. he says dumb things every great once in a while. this was just an all time low, but he was being honest and alcohol kind of rids yourself of inhibitions. if i were drunk i might tell him something about going bald or getting love handles..lol..but i don't drink. anyways, thank you for you post. you seem to understand where i am coming from. i couldn't believe that he said what he said, but it was a moment of bad words for him and it was out of character. i was wrong, i think, in displaying it to the world. but, i can't tell my mom (my best friends), and i don't want to bore some of my other friends with my problems, so this was just a place to vent.

i do shave. he was the one that needs to shave, i have a thing against hair. lol.

my mom's dressing was AWESOME this year. and i couldn't get enough of the sweet potatoes. and the turkey was slow smoked for 24 hours prior to eating, and the dark meat was so juicy and gooooooodddd. so, i just thought i didn't like thanksgiving dinner, man, i can't wait until next year. i had cheesecake, too! now, the next big one will be new year's day, when we have greens, cabbage, black eyed peas, fried hog jowl/salt meat, fried potatoes, macoroni and cheese, green Beans, and sweet corn bread...that will be a hard one, i have my third fill the following day. (for christmas we have homeade lasagna and cesear salad).

i feel that i should defend him. and of course, even battered women defend their man. he did insult me, and he really hurt my feelings, but it is not a habit of his to say things like this to me. i think that is why it is hurtful. i know that my weight is an issue for him, as far as attractiveness, but he has not ever been one to say anything. he has even told me before that he is afraid he will miss me big because it "feels so good to lay with me skin to skin (no bones)". he tells me that i am beautiful and that he loves me. he is an absolute wonderful father. i cannot agree that in our relationship it would be better to leave. my dh makes it a point to lie in bed with our son for about 15 minutes and read or tell stories and talk about their day (sometimes i like to stand in the hall while the door is open and listen). they always play together. my son absolutely adores his dad. in my opinion, our argument had several ingredients that are not always there, i had SEVERE pms, and i had been being a total bitch, i am being honest. he had a few beer before bed, and we are both stressed about money right now. i feel bad for posting this now, as i realize how it may look. this is just one day among many. i'm sure some of you women out there have had your guy be a total jerk a time or two, but not all of the time, no one should have to put up with that. sometimes, i think they just say the dumbest things, without thinking about how we will take it. anyways, i think my dh just talks. and then i take it a certain way and talk and talk and talk, and i hold grudges, and i do not easily forgive. he on the other hand, blows it off as no big deal, and starts trying to make me laugh. i don't know, i opened this can, so i welcome all of your posts, but he's really not this ugly all of the time. we are just having a bad couple of weeks. (we have done this before about 2 years ago..weird, it was around the same time of year...huh, maybe it is the holidays).

delted-i decided that it shouldn't be posted here.

by the way, i never thought of myself as a sugar addict either. i was a junk food junkie. if it had grease and had cheese, that's what i ate. but when it comes down to it, i was consuming A LOT of sugar in my drinks. i would have OJ for breakfast, and a Route 44 coke, coke for lunch, coke for dinner (not always would i have 3 a day, but you get the picture). The i would have sweet tea, more sweet tea, and more sweet tea. rarely did i ever buy cookies or candy bars (only one week a month), and if i had little debbie snack cakes in the house, i would eat about one a week (not the whole box in a day). so, after surgery, it was really a rude-awakening as to how much sugar i was actually craving. that is when all the craziness kicked in.

WOW!:clap2::clap2::clap2::clap2::clap2::clap2::clap2::clap2::clap2::clap2::clap2::clap2::clap2::clap2::clap2::clap2::clap2::clap2::clap2: That was the most beautiful, well versed, and encouraging post i have ever read. Thank you, Thank you, Thank you. ..where do i get cinammon capsules, and the money thing is genuis, pure genuis.

my dh had some routine blood work drawn about a year ago. it, too, showed elevated liver enzymes, so they scheduled him for a hepa test (scared to death, one of his friends has hep). well, it turns out, it wasn't hepatitis. i don't agree with his doctor because they did no more testing, they just said, ok, well, you don 't have hepa, but keep your high enzymes. so, i'm so surprised your doctor just assumed you have hepa, that is horrible to scare you with without any evidence.

Just FYI. go the the website Black Friday 2007 Thanksgiving Day Black Friday Ads at Black-Friday.net. they have had a lot of stores sales posted on there for about a month. the cool part is, each store has some things that can be bought online (sometimes with free shipping to store). i'm taking advantage of that this year. i will be up at 4:00 a.m. and online. (i have pretty much all of my purchasing done, but i want one of those gaming chairs, and wal-mart has one for $30).

i was a 40. i am now a 38.

wow, how can you slime over a liquid?!!! i've never thought about that before. although, i was a HUGE sweet tea fan, but now, i think my unsweetend is sweetened. my son has to taste it for me to tell me that it isn't.

i am going to have to try it soon. i can literally see white patches on my scalp from dandruff...and it's nasty. my skin is breaking out real bad too, any suggestions?

ok, i'm going to stick my neck out here and be honest. i am having an absolute horrible time stopping and eating sugar. i had asked a seasoned bandster on another thread for some tips, and she suggested that we do a thread because there are others who are probably suffering from the same problem. after i received a pm, from another bandster wanting to know what suggestions i was given, i decided to post. honestly, this is the hardest addiction ever. i have kicked cigs, and other substances to the curve, but this one is hard. very very very very hard. i think about sugar all day. if i have something in the house, it literally calls my name. if i have something at work it is the same way. if there are Cookies in the break room, i cannot stay away from them. i have to admit that most of this has occured during a week of the month where i have always gone on a sugar binge. but this is terrible. chocolate, candy, and cookies go down super smooth. please share tips for kicking this habit. most people have said that they cut the carbs and that cuts the cravings. ok, tell us how you fought the craving during the period that your body transitioned. tell us what you did, please. also, i know that the band will not do all of the work, and i also know that i should not be eating these things, so please, i do not need to be reminded of that. if possible i would like to keep this thread on a positive encouraging note, that gives tips to some of us newer people that need it. i really don't want it to turn into a bashing session. i mean, i can handle it, i do it to myself, but please, let's keep it positive and informational. i have to put a tip on here that wasa gave me yesterday. she believes that cutting the carbs is the answer, and i believe that is what i need to do. she said that if you have to eat something sweet, do it later in the day before you go to bed, that way you sleep through the sugar spikes and drops. i'm going to try that. it makes since to me. however, my worse time is in the morning, and it always has been. as soon as i wake up my mouth SCREAMS sugar. it used to be sweet tea, now it is nothing.

when i first replied to this thread, i was half asleep, so i only paid attention to the fee part. Even if i would have paid for the fee, i still do not regret my decision to go self pay. granted, i am only a month out, and im having sugar fits, but i can already tell how much my appetite has been curbed.

i listen to my radio every day at work. nifty little thing.