Wayne Hunt

It's hard for anyone here to give anything but a general response, because everyone's hospital and experiences might be different.
I'm 5 days out from surgery and my list might sound scary (and it does represent a huge change for me) but it's really not. It's just a part of all invasive surgery procedures.

What I knew about, but find extremely weird to be confronted with now are;
The pain coming out of surgery. I have no idea why, but I just never expected a "few little cuts" to be so gut-wrenchingly ouchy... Apparently bad enough to bring out my inner four-letter curse machine while on meds. (a sincere apology to my very wonderful nursing staff by the way)

That however is usually well-managed in the hospital and by the time I was sent home, it felt like it would after you fell off a skateboard as a kid.. Now in day 5, most of the pain is almost gone to the point I might wish I could return to work early (out of boredom), but don't... Take the time your body needs to adjust because this is a big, big deal.

Just be prepared. Other people might have experienced it differently, but for the first few days, every time I coughed, sneezed, or moved, it felt like my guts were about to burst. They haven't, but I do find it useful to hold a small pillow over my stomach when I cough just to cushion the impact of that action, but it'll be ok..
Suddenly -- at least for a while -- you REALLY aren't hungry. For my post-surgery liquid phase, I'm supposed to be drinking 64 ounces of Water and at least two Protein shakes. So far, I can manage the two shakes (Breakfast and supper) but I *really* don't want them at all. The rest of the day, I'm forcing myself to sip half-dosed bottles of Crystal Light, which are now actually too sweet and make me extremely gassy, but it's still better than tap water...

So far, all I can do -- and it's VERY difficult -- is two 11-oz Protein Shakes and about 32 oz of Water a day.
Take a look at what your doctor recommends for an after-diet. Make sure you have those in abundance before leaving for the hospital. In my case, premixed Protein Shakes (Premier), a small variety of broths (I recommend boxed, and the Swanson "flavor infused" make for a nice change), Jello, and so-forth.
Buy all your post-op meds and Vitamins before-hand.
{edit:} Originally I was lamenting not buying "gummie" Vitamins, but based on the comments below, I went back and realized that "gummie" = bad... Not allowed by Doctors so... My advice is now this.

For the rest of your life you'll be taking vitamins. It might cost you a buck or two more now, but at first buy small quantities rather than Sam's Club size because honestly, you'll probably find one you like better.

For example, I thought the taste of an orange-flavored chewable sounded awesome. Now, after chewing the giant pills three times a day for 5 days? Not so much...
Speaking of vitamins, be prepared to devote a good portion of your time getting used to taking them on a set schedule. I now have five different types that I have to spread out in multiple dosing schedules throughout every day.
Be prepared to sip water or sugar-free Crystal light ALL DAY LONG. In a day, if your doctor is like mine, he'll recommend 64 oz of water a day. Pre-surgery, not a problem when you could drink a 4 oz gulp easily. Not so much any more. Anything more than a sip at a time (at least for me) results in gas and a bloaty stomach... (mild dumping)
Lovenox shots. Even if you're in a good way, you will probably end up having to subject yourself to two weeks of self-administered shots to your lower (fatty part) belly. Lovenox is a blood thinner, and helps to ensure that you don't end up with blood clots after your surgery. Bright side is, everyone knows how much these suck, so they've generally made the needle so small that it's virtually painless.

For *me* to be able to do it (so far) is one hell of an indication that anyone can do it.
Gas... Wow.. Ok. For the first few days at least after the surgery, you're going to be an extremely gassy beast. All of us (as I understand it) are because of how the Laparoscopic procedure works, inserting air/gas into your body cavity to shift/move things around. This might be embarrassing, or you might just take a little pride in "letting 'er rip". Either way, it helps you feel better, because half the pain you feel after surgery is that gas. The other half is caused by the incisions and internal cuts themselves.
Walking helps... If you're like I was, walking will help in getting rid of that gas. Trouble is, on Days 1 and 2, they might have to pull you kicking and cursing from your hospital bed to take those initial few hundred steps. Once you can equate the walking to the Willy Wonka soda-room belching, you'll be far more willing to get in a little activity in exchange for a little relief.

Just so you understand, "people" suck...
"People" around you, even friends and family, sometimes don't know how to be supportive. They also have to deal with both their own weight issues and in some cases find it easier to try and "sabotage" you than fix their own mess.
WLS changes things. You. Your body. Your mindset. Your relationship with food. Your relationship with other people. Some changes are phenomenal. Some changes are difficult.
The trick is the realization that you decided to make this change for yourself. You may have to work to assure other people that you're still the same "you" but if they're truly friends, you'll all find a way...
For me, it's been interesting because pre-op, I was a standing, daily member of the "lunch crew". Now, I have to actively ask them to participate because it seems like they're afraid to invite me to lunch. Our relationship has changed in that respect because we had food as a primary "interface"... Now, I have to assure them that -- while I might eat tiny bits -- I still do eat food..
At my last support group meeting, a fellow attendee said "WLS doesn't automatically change your relationship with food".. I would politely disagree. Before surgery, I ate what, when, and how much I wanted but now food and I tend to disagree a lot more when I misbehave...
Food and I have gone from a "love affair" to a "tolerated roommate" scenario, and that's not a bad thing..
Wayne

Not too many responses at all. They've all been valuable input, and greatly appreciated.
I do journal religiously using MFP (217 day streak currently), That may be a bigger cause of my stress than I had imagined because I see the trends for calories going up and up over time, while I'm sitting at the same 3 pound range for the last couple of months.. I *generally* obey the 30/30/30 rule when eating and drinking at meal time (no Fluid 30 minutes before, take 30 to eat, no fluids 30 minutes after). OCCASIONALLY I find the need to break that rule when I eat something that doesn't quite go down right (like dry, white meat chicken for example) but generally, I do pretty well at it. re: support groups. Inova has one meeting per month, and it's really helpful, but it's simply not enough (for me) to feel like it's any real level of support. We gather, share "war stories", then we go home. I will check into OA though to see if maybe that would be what I'm looking for. Part of my problem -- unlike most people -- is that when I started this, I'm a thousand miles away from "home". I know almost no one outside of work, so I don't really have a great support system of family or friends nearby. If I did, maybe this wouldn't be as big an issue for me.
Where "dieting" is concerned, and it bleeds over into this journey, is that I'm a data geek. I live by imperical numbers. Numbers I can wrap my head around. When I was doing WW, I used to print every day out, log it, chart it, et cetera until I could see what was going on.
Being post op at 6 months, it's a different experience than simply dieting. I'm fretting about getting everything I'm supposed to (chart wise) while dealing with a team that seems to want me to overeat (in my opinion) and since I don't need any encouragement there AT ALL, I'm just feeling a bit passive aggressive over the idea of being pushed in the wrong direction by my nutritionist...
Crazy or not, that's where I'm at right now...
(HUMOROUSLY an on a serendipitous note, my custom car tags just came in last week. The customized plates read "CRAAAZY"...)
Wayne

Wayne,
Kick your negative thoughts.. OUT! Follow the guidelines, but listen to your body and you will succeed. You HAVE succeeded. I agree with counting grams of Protein if that helps.
Me, well I try to eat what I like. I am only 2 weeks post op and on to pureed foods and am dealing with meals I cook, smooshed. I cannot wait for SALADS, though! I so empathize with the Protein drinks though... yucky.

That's just it James, I'm 6 months out, and eating a cup, two cups, or even a cheeseburger isn't an issue for me any more as long as it's moist, I eat slowly and take small bites.
I don't really get full, just that "one bite, too much, you're sick" level of full. I tried explaining this to the nutritionist repeatedly only to be met with "you're funny" (as though she believes im joking) then she rides my butt about not losing more weight, when all I hear in my head is her yelling at me to constantly eat even when I'm not hungry...
I'm flummoxed..

Thanks very much! I appreciate your advice and it all sounds right to me. I just want to lose that last 20 pounds, get to 199 before the sophomore bounce kicks in, and I'm afraid I'm being tripped up by her voice in my head telling me to constantly be eating "a meal"...
I'll see if I can get back to the post op diet to see if that kicks me off the 219 shelf and moves me towards Onederland..
Thanks again,
Wayne

In April 2014, I underwent a Gastric Bypass surgery.
My highest documented weight was 327.8 pounds. That's not my highest weight ever, just the one time I happened to go to the doctor. I'm guessing my real high weight was somewhere north of 350 at one point. Anyway, 6 months after surgery, I'm fluctuating between 219.7, and 223.2 pounds depending on the day really... I'm pretty much where I need to be, but I'm now scared of the "sophomore bounce" (that 10-20 pounds patients typically gain back later on)...
My problem -- hence this post -- is that I'm having trouble caused by my nutritionist's demands that I "eat three meals a day +2 shakes" even if I'm not hungry...
I understand what she's trying to say. She is reading from the generic textbook and lumping me in with everyone else, trying to make sure I get my Protein and other needs met. The trouble for me is that her nagging voice in my head is causing me to do nothing but sit here and think about eating all day long... Because her idea of a "meal" and mine differ greatly, I'm truly scared that I'm doing myself harm by eating constantly just because it happens to be a meal time, or because I'm "supposed to" be eating 3 meals a day...
I'm constantly stuffed, sometimes to the point of being ill, but now I'm at the point where if I'm not eating, I'm thinking about eating, and that's scaring the bejeebus out of me.
I'm not specifically blaming her for my issues. I know this is all psychologically in my head, but I'm just trying to fight between her voice in my head urging me to constantly eat and my own "diet mindset" to simply not eat anything at all until I'm actually hungry... In the meantime, I've gone from 300 calories a day post surgery (liquid diet) to having trouble staying under 1500 calories a day now...
(For the record, when I ask her "give me a number of calories I'm supposed to stick to", she just tells me "I'm not worried about calories" which truly pisses me off, because I *need* some imperical number to serve as a guide...)
Any help or constructive input would be appreciated,
Wayne

Suddenly, I can't get Billy Joel out of my head... "You may be right. I may be crazy..."
Seriously though, The only time I've dealt with therapists (psychologists, whatever you want to call them) all they did was spout generic Weight Watchers BS at me -- much like my nutritionist is doing now.
I fully and openly admit that 75% of the problem resides in my own head, but what tends to push my buttons is that I'm not getting anywhere near the support I need from the people who're supposed to be providing it.
The mandatory 6 month "training courses" were nothing more than "weight watcher light" groups where the (same) nutritionist handed out pamplets telling us to "eat salads, not burgers, but don't use dressing" crap.
I'm taking what they're saying now too seriously because I want to be successful at this, and to be told cookie-cutter BS about "eat 3 meals, even when you're not hungry" -- quite frankly -- pisses me off. A bit moreso because now I've been shoehorned into the routine of eating 3 meals a day, even when I'm not hungry at all because -- supposedly -- "that's how you lose weight". See where that might be a bit peevish?
I know how to fix it, and it's all on me, but it means that I basically disregard what has been hammered into my head by the nutritionist, meaning that I'll have to listen to her kvetch about it later.
I'm just going to have to get back into the mindset of "yes, eat Protein 3 times a day, but only eat when you get hungry" rather than trying to adhere to the maddening "3 meals a day, even if you're not hungry" routine..
Now, I'm going to go back and rewind the Billy Joel running through my head and laugh about all of this for a while. See you at lunch..
Wayne

There is no one formula of how to lose weight. This is your individual journey and what works for others may not work for you. I've lost over 100% of my excess weight and have been maintaining below goal for 4 months. And this was without 1 single postop meeting with a nutritionist. I also never counted calories or measured my food. I haven't always eaten sugar free (artificial sweeteners upset my stomach the first 4 months) and never restricted my fats. I eat when I'm hungry and only until satisfied, not full. This may mean 3 times/day or eight times a day, depending on what I ate and what I'm doing that day. I get 30-40g Protein from a shake everyday and this frees me up to eat a balanced diet of Protein, fruits, veggies and whole grains instead of having to load up on protein at every meal. Basically Just like a "normal" person. I think a healthy variety lends itself to long term success because I don't feel deprived.
I'm not saying to do it my way, I'm just saying there is more than one way. Seriously, with all of the nutritional education you've already gotten, plus ideas on here, and a little common sense it's not hard to know what and how to eat. Listen to your body, not your nut. Her generic instructions may not be the best for you. I say do it your way, while sticking with the general rules of Water, protein and Vitamins. If you lose, great. If you stall or gain, assess what and how much you are eating as well as your exercise, and make adjustments that fit your life (not what your nut's weight watchers handbook says).
Maybe there's a reason for the statistic of WLS patients only losing 65% of their excess weight....the "experts" only know what their talking about 65% of the time. Same goes for the sophomore gain. If you lost all your weight following restrictive, unnatural rules, then it only makes sense you would gain once you tried to maintain a normal lifestyle. No different than every diet we've ever been on. Just lose it in a way that fits your life in the first place (even if this means slower) and it will be easier to maintain that loss.
Good luck with those voices in your head ????

I believe you have some flexibility. It is important to consume the amount of Protein required but how you do this is somewhat up to you. I am 18 months post-op from RNY gastric bypass surgery and ever since my surgery my meal plan has been in flux. I relied on home-made high Protein chili and Soups for my meals. Since I am up to a cup per meal now, I gain around 60 grams of protein just from my meals alone. Your protein requirement is the combination of protein from meals combined with protein from supplements. As time went on I was able to transition completely off Protein shakes as a supplement. I hate the taste of Protein Shakes. Now my protein supplements consists of a hot cup of cocoa (no sugar added) in the morning and a berry smoothie in the late afternoon. I also found that Protein Bars (QuestBar) is a good source of protein when I am on the go and unable to use my Ninja blender.

Nutritionists just don't get it sometimes!! lol.
From what others tell me, it isn't that you should have a "meal" 3 times a day but that you should be eating some Protein 3 times a day at meal time, plus 2 more times for Snacks. BAsically, the way someone told me was to eat some Protein every 2-3 hours. And, instead of counting calories, which we are all trained to do, count grams of protein instead. I don't know how much you need but I was told for me (or maybe for women) to get between 60-80 grams of protein in a day. That's the measurement I use instead of calories. And its's an "eat your protein first" rule. I'm also supposed to be counting grams of carbs now but am having trouble with that.
So, my day generally looks like this (when I'm doing it right)
Breakfast: 1 kashi bar, coffee,
about an hour later: 1 hard boiled egg
about an hour or 2 after that: yogurt (the Fit and Light yogurt)
Lunch: 2-3 oz. of chicken with some veggies from the salad bar, balsamic vinegar is my dressing
Around 3pm: cottage cheese
Dinner: 3-4 oz of chicken or ground turkey, or shrimp, or some kind of protein (sometimes edamame). Some veggies if I can.
Dessert: Protein Bar (the type I have depends on how many grams of protein I still need to get in), and some frozen grapes.
I have no idea how many calories that is but I do know this fulfills my protein intake. I also sometimes throw in some multigrain crackers with some Peanut Butter on them but I need to stop that nonsense!
Each ounce of protein has about 7 grams. (I also just looked at my spreadsheet that I keep and here is what I was told:
I would start with your post-op diet routine and track all the you eat.
Postop diet is 60 to 80 grams of protein, 30 grams of fats, and no more than 100 grams of carbs.
Eating Proteins first, then carbs and finally fats.
Counting calories drives me nuts but it is familiar. But I am now getting better at counting grams of protein.
Best of luck to you and don't stop doing the right thing!!! You can do it!

I can't really help with the multi, because I use the Centrum chewable. I'll probably swap to Flintstones or something "fun" when I run out of the Centrum. Mostly because it's time to change things up.
As for my calcium citrate, I tried the Bariatric Advantage Cinnamon tablets when I first started but found them extremely chalky. On a whim when I was at my doctor's office one day, I picked up a bag of Bariatric Advantage 500mg chewables (the "candy" style) which are more like a caramel square. I figure I'd definitely end up eating 3 of those a day and it's easier than any chalky chewable, even if it's a bit more expensive.
Wayne

Today is (hopefully) a banner day. 3.5 months after surgery, I spent the night culling my closet and have three full clothes hampers worth of casual and work clothing to donate to Good Will.
Went from 3x and 4x shirts down to XL (so far) and 48/50 pants down to a 42.
That, I think, quantifies this as a personal NSV, and makes the whole experience worth it.
How did you feel when you got to that point?
Wayne

Before surgery, I was your typical Mountain Dew addled computer geek. It really wouldn't take much for me to drink a six-pack of sodas per day. Then I became diabetic and swapped to diet Mt Dew (with no real hesitation at all). After a couple of weeks, I couldn't even stand non-diet soda (too sweet).
When I decided to get surgery, I really did go "cold turkey" and I didn't miss sodas at all because of the sheer determination to have the surgery and get my life back on track.
Flash forward to now, almost 6 months after surgery.
I haven't had caffeine in almost 8 months. That being said, I'm now completely sick and tired of everything between tea, to kool-aids, to Protein Shakes to... well, everything that I've been drinking exclusively for the last six months. Never been a coffee guy, so at least I don't have the Starbucks monkey on my back...
This morning, sitting at work, I realized that I was out of little singles packs of Kool-Aid, really didn't want a Protein shake, or Water either. I *know* that I can't tolerate carbonated soda, but I looked in the drawer and found the bottles of Sodastream diet syrups. I decided to make a half-dosed bottle (1/4 cap with 16 oz water and ice) and tolerated it just fine.
I had been missing the flavor, not really the carbonation, and the first caffeine after 8 months must be what a crack addict feels like as well.
All things in moderation, I get it, but I'm just trying to look for alternatives to drink (not really a plain water drinker) at this point and I hope I'm not screwing up...
Any opinions on using said syrups in moderation?
Wayne

Today is (hopefully) a banner day. 3.5 months after surgery, I spent the night culling my closet and have three full clothes hampers worth of casual and work clothing to donate to Good Will.
Went from 3x and 4x shirts down to XL (so far) and 48/50 pants down to a 42.
That, I think, quantifies this as a personal NSV, and makes the whole experience worth it.
How did you feel when you got to that point?
Wayne

I am overjoyed this morning to report I weigh 199! It is a big day. Most people can say I haven't weighed that since...but honestly I don't know when I last weighed this as I avoided the scale. I am so excited to say I joined the onderland club! 25 years ago I was around 170 I believe. I have had a slow weight loss compared to some but it is going down and I am thrilled nonetheless. Yippee!

Today is (hopefully) a banner day. 3.5 months after surgery, I spent the night culling my closet and have three full clothes hampers worth of casual and work clothing to donate to Good Will.
Went from 3x and 4x shirts down to XL (so far) and 48/50 pants down to a 42.
That, I think, quantifies this as a personal NSV, and makes the whole experience worth it.
How did you feel when you got to that point?
Wayne

Today is (hopefully) a banner day. 3.5 months after surgery, I spent the night culling my closet and have three full clothes hampers worth of casual and work clothing to donate to Good Will.
Went from 3x and 4x shirts down to XL (so far) and 48/50 pants down to a 42.
That, I think, quantifies this as a personal NSV, and makes the whole experience worth it.
How did you feel when you got to that point?
Wayne

Today is (hopefully) a banner day. 3.5 months after surgery, I spent the night culling my closet and have three full clothes hampers worth of casual and work clothing to donate to Good Will.
Went from 3x and 4x shirts down to XL (so far) and 48/50 pants down to a 42.
That, I think, quantifies this as a personal NSV, and makes the whole experience worth it.
How did you feel when you got to that point?
Wayne

Today is (hopefully) a banner day. 3.5 months after surgery, I spent the night culling my closet and have three full clothes hampers worth of casual and work clothing to donate to Good Will.
Went from 3x and 4x shirts down to XL (so far) and 48/50 pants down to a 42.
That, I think, quantifies this as a personal NSV, and makes the whole experience worth it.
How did you feel when you got to that point?
Wayne

Just so you understand, "people" suck...
"People" around you, even friends and family, sometimes don't know how to be supportive. They also have to deal with both their own weight issues and in some cases find it easier to try and "sabotage" you than fix their own mess.
WLS changes things. You. Your body. Your mindset. Your relationship with food. Your relationship with other people. Some changes are phenomenal. Some changes are difficult.
The trick is the realization that you decided to make this change for yourself. You may have to work to assure other people that you're still the same "you" but if they're truly friends, you'll all find a way...
For me, it's been interesting because pre-op, I was a standing, daily member of the "lunch crew". Now, I have to actively ask them to participate because it seems like they're afraid to invite me to lunch. Our relationship has changed in that respect because we had food as a primary "interface"... Now, I have to assure them that -- while I might eat tiny bits -- I still do eat food..
At my last support group meeting, a fellow attendee said "WLS doesn't automatically change your relationship with food".. I would politely disagree. Before surgery, I ate what, when, and how much I wanted but now food and I tend to disagree a lot more when I misbehave...
Food and I have gone from a "love affair" to a "tolerated roommate" scenario, and that's not a bad thing..
Wayne

Nicole,
I've said it before, but it bears repeating... "People" (like this Nurse friend of yours) suck...
For the record, none of what you repeated from him is true at all. I'm -- I believe -- 13-14 weeks out now. I've stopped counting..
Eating: I eat what I want, but strongly make every effort to eat right. I just eat very small bits of it, so if I go to Ford's Fish Shack and order a Smoked Salmon dinner, I already know I'll get 3 to 4 meals out of it for the same price I was paying before. Most economical, and most incorrect on his part.
Shots: Ok.. A given. For most of us, there are about 2 weeks (14 days) post surgery where we have to give ourselves injections of Lovenox, which is a blood thinner. I'm TERRIFIED of needles, but they made me do the first one in the hospital and I realized that the needles they use now are so incredibly tiny that you don't even feel them... I'm really a big wimpy baby where pain and shots are concerned, so please believe me when I say that for *me* to be able to do it, absolutely anyone can do it.
"it messes up your entire gastric system": K? Say Wha?!? What a declarative BS, idiotic, non-statement... It's like the WLS equivalent of "bringing up Hitler in a forum debate"..
WLS surgery is a big deal. You may only see the 5 little cuts, but your body takes several months to adjust. That being said, nothing is "messed up". If anything, your gastric system is put to right, where you are then restricted from eating badly. food also becomes like the number one focus of your life for a while as you learn how to eat right. Something that most of us NEVER knew how to do pre-op.
The benefits of WLS for "people of size" are extremely well documented. Major, MAJOR benefits which -- depending on your surgery -- are usually long-lasting. Otherwise, the number crunchers at the insurance companies would fight you tooth and nail before spending a dime of the money they've already taken from you...
The end result, and I mean this very sincerely is that your "friend" is an idiot. At least where Weight Loss Surgery is concerned. While I absolutely understand your hesitance to share your intent with others, as you've discovered, not everyone is an idiot...
My "learn to be quiet" moment came during the 6-month mandated insurance wait when I told a co-worker who instantly said "oh, you'll never qualify for that, you don't need that, I'd never approve you for something like that", etcetera...
Now I'm 60 pounds lighter than when I started this process and I have absolutely no regrets...
The funniest thing happened though. Ever since my bypass, my aforementioned co-worker has become like the first one in the room who "notices" and compliments me on my progress, so there's hope..
Anyone that gives you negative? "Show them the hand" and just truck on with your bad self.
We're here for you,
Wayne

Nicole,
I've said it before, but it bears repeating... "People" (like this Nurse friend of yours) suck...
For the record, none of what you repeated from him is true at all. I'm -- I believe -- 13-14 weeks out now. I've stopped counting..
Eating: I eat what I want, but strongly make every effort to eat right. I just eat very small bits of it, so if I go to Ford's Fish Shack and order a Smoked Salmon dinner, I already know I'll get 3 to 4 meals out of it for the same price I was paying before. Most economical, and most incorrect on his part.
Shots: Ok.. A given. For most of us, there are about 2 weeks (14 days) post surgery where we have to give ourselves injections of Lovenox, which is a blood thinner. I'm TERRIFIED of needles, but they made me do the first one in the hospital and I realized that the needles they use now are so incredibly tiny that you don't even feel them... I'm really a big wimpy baby where pain and shots are concerned, so please believe me when I say that for *me* to be able to do it, absolutely anyone can do it.
"it messes up your entire gastric system": K? Say Wha?!? What a declarative BS, idiotic, non-statement... It's like the WLS equivalent of "bringing up Hitler in a forum debate"..
WLS surgery is a big deal. You may only see the 5 little cuts, but your body takes several months to adjust. That being said, nothing is "messed up". If anything, your gastric system is put to right, where you are then restricted from eating badly. food also becomes like the number one focus of your life for a while as you learn how to eat right. Something that most of us NEVER knew how to do pre-op.
The benefits of WLS for "people of size" are extremely well documented. Major, MAJOR benefits which -- depending on your surgery -- are usually long-lasting. Otherwise, the number crunchers at the insurance companies would fight you tooth and nail before spending a dime of the money they've already taken from you...
The end result, and I mean this very sincerely is that your "friend" is an idiot. At least where Weight Loss Surgery is concerned. While I absolutely understand your hesitance to share your intent with others, as you've discovered, not everyone is an idiot...
My "learn to be quiet" moment came during the 6-month mandated insurance wait when I told a co-worker who instantly said "oh, you'll never qualify for that, you don't need that, I'd never approve you for something like that", etcetera...
Now I'm 60 pounds lighter than when I started this process and I have absolutely no regrets...
The funniest thing happened though. Ever since my bypass, my aforementioned co-worker has become like the first one in the room who "notices" and compliments me on my progress, so there's hope..
Anyone that gives you negative? "Show them the hand" and just truck on with your bad self.
We're here for you,
Wayne

The entire process to me was surprisingly drama-free. The 6-month insurance-mandated waiting period was the hardest part, and biggest waste of time where I was required to do the 6 separate "training classes". Each of those cost me money out of pocket and amounted to FAR less information than I ever got in the average Weight Watchers meeting.
The fact that you're diving in and learning on your own is a fantastic thing. "The more you know"... "Knowledge is power", and any other cliches that might be appropriate and all that...
If you're forced to go through a similar waiting period, don't freak out, and don't waver. That's what the insurance companies are hoping you'll do, and (I propose) why they do it in the first place.
13 weeks out, I've adopted a saying that I seem to be applying a lot to my own journey (and offering to others as a sign of support.... It's very fitting, and very appropriate to the great things coming your way... It is simply this;
"Welcome to the Best of your life"

Wayne

Congrats and welcome to the best of your life!
When I was about 4-5 days post-op, I was almost exactly like you. NEVER hungry but tummy always growling. The feeling like you're going to burst is pretty normal, but if I had to guess I would say it's a decent indication that you're taking too big a sip each time. The day I left the hospital, I was getting ready to walk out the door, grabbed the mug they gave me, and -- without thinking -- took what used to be a normal gulp full of Water.
Big, big mistake.
If you haven't already, you might consider a "sippy cup" and realize that you are NOT expected to be able to drink 64 oz of Water per day at this point. 64oz is the goal, not the starting point. Just take a sip, sit down the glass, do something else. In a minute or so take a sip, rinse, repeat for the entire day.
The big thing here is to keep hydrated, and keep your throat wet throughout the day.
Drinking (and eating) more will come with time as your body heals and adapts to the massive change you've just gone through. Trust me, at 13 weeks or so out, I'm just now starting to deal with cravings again. Not like I'm really hungry. It's all in my head, but it's more like normal where I'd really just like a bite or two of my favorite foods. I order what I want, take a couple of bites, then make 3-4 meals out of the leftovers in a to-go box. It's all good.
What you're going through is the physically hard part right now. It gets much, much better.
Wayne