First things first! You talked about head hunger. Your body will truly let you know when you need to feed it. Sometimes though, you will have to force yourself to eat cause you will noticed that you have went so long during the day without eating. To prevent that, plan your meals and stick to a schedule. Eat slowly to prevent the dumping syndrome. Take your time and you will find a balance of when you are truly hungry or just needing something because you are feeling a certain way.
Next you talked about dealing with the food feasts & your family. This was one of the topics that was discussed at one of the support groups. Try to change the focus from food to activities like playing a game of charades or some type of activity to get people moving. One of the things I do is eat slowly, chew slowly, enjoy the conversations with everyone, get up and dance, help with cleaning tasks, anything to get me moving and out of the way and then take my plate to go. Hope this helps.