CassieWNY

Blue - Thanks for one of the best laughs I have had in a long time. I know what you mean about a good colorist! They have to be tolerated...the cost of beauty. Congrats on your weight loss and best of luck on your continued journey.

Asking someone to be respectful does not mean "sugar coating" (see Tap Snap) nor does it suggest that constructive feedback which fails to be sympathetic should be avoided at all costs. We do need to have will power and mental strength to overcome struggles. Saying that - smart mouthed comments like "stop eating" and the like are really unnecessary and completely off base. They are not productive and MANY people spoke up to say that in a very constructive manner. Your presumption is that a tough message is the only message? I saw a great deal of postings in there that encouraged exercise, activity, monitoring intake etc. What people spoke up about here were the flippant comments responding to a poster asking for support. What I find very revealing is that you support the "harsh reality" approach and completely disregard and downplay a supportive, constructive, communicative approach. I believe you characterize it as over-exaggerated sympathy. Clearly we would just all be thinner if we closed the fridge and stopped eating. Right? That's the solution from one of the earlier posters who has been called out. The harsh reality method of feedback that you support. The "tough love" approach as many call it. Tell these people asking for support that if they slip up it is because they are mentally weak and lack will power? I cannot believe I didn't think of that... That is why I have been FAT this entire time???????? Thanks. REPLY to TapSnap - I am not going to dismiss your commentary on your youth. Based upon the content of your posts, your lack of remorse, and your complete disregard for the constructive feedback you received, it is glaringly apparent that you have a great deal of healing ahead of you.

This post highlights the fears so many of us have on the physical and emotional side of this journey. Your surgeon and his/her office should be able to assist you with the fears of surgery (especially those with other health complications). I do not have much data on the chances of becoming anorexic. Since anorexia is an eating disorder that is not about food - it is about someone's coping with emotional problems by losing weight/increasing exercise - I think the probability of developing that is extremely low. Saying that, it is very true that people replace some bad habits with others so it is important to consider the emotional consequences before undergoing this surgery. I would encourage anyone who is considering this surgery or scheduled for surgery to ask upfront for information on coping with this new lifestyle and its challenges. That would include asking about all area support groups, online options, psychologists/counselors, mentors, etc. Putting a plan in place to assist you with this part of the journey - the emotional one - is a smart move. If you have a good support network or can build one, I encourage that for after the surgery. As many of us are finding - this surgery does not take place in a vacuum - life goes on. People face challenges and dark times - many not anticipated - following this surgery and I recommend having a plan in place in case life hands you lemons. That being said - most people are not facing their biggest fears - loss of income, job, spouse, loved one. But life happens - so being prepared to face life after is critical. Having doubts is normal and a very healthy way to approach this surgery. This process of critical thinking is a good one. If your gut instincts tell you this is not the right choice for you - then follow them. You know what is best for you. We tend to focus a great deal on the weight loss and a little less on the positives that come with the weight loss. We celebrate the pounds off - many of us with the assumption that people understand what less weight means. I encourage people who are concerned about moving forward to dig through these postigs and see the results people are getting beyond the pounds. (Not to say that the reduction in pounds is not also fun to look at). What have I seen by other posters - MORE self esteem from achieving goals - fitting in the airplane seatbelt, onederland, shopping in the regular size department, having doors opened for you, getting a family portrait taken, finally able to stand looking at yourself in a mirror...... MORE energy - Many people remark that they finally "FEEL ALIVE" again. COMPLETE recovery from co-morbidities, including Type 2 diabetes, high BP, sleep apnea to name a few MORE active lives - from exercise to just being out of the house more MORE happiness enjoying time with family and friends, getting rid of the self-hate, removing the guilt associated with their weight gain Dig deep....the results are there beyond the pounds. Have a well thought out plan for emotional support if you go forward. Trust your instincts. Deciding not to go forward with this surgery now or ever may be in your best interests. This is not for everyone. Either way - take good care of yourself.

Sweetsusie - If you keep hitting dead ends on obtaining credit, those denials can also mess up your credit history. You might want to go to a very reputable not for profit consumer credit counseling service and start a plan to clean up your credit. That past experience will leave your report quicker if you work on cleaning up your credit history. It can be done. Then you will be able to shop for lower rates and better companies that extend credit. Just a thought. Good luck.

I am going to respectfully disagree with this poster. I believe the OP was looking for feedback that would help her. I do not approach this site believing that people who have struggled with weight loss over many years, jumped through 1000 insurance and medical hoops, possibly paid tens of thousands of dollars, and then underwent surgery are here for blunt, unsupportive, rude and/or severely critical feedback. Don't we face that enough being overweight in our society?? My assumption is that feedback on this site is supportive and constructive. Constructive feedback is not blunt. How one was raised does not excuse ignorance. Being raised differently is not an excuse for being impolite to someone who is seeking support. As a society we should be searching to help others not hurt them. So many people who are about to undergo this procedure are combing through these postings. Here we have a very typical situation where someone is searching for help 4 months post-op and we have a few individuals posting the same critical bs we face every day from people that judge us because we are overweight. What kind of message is that for people who are here seeking answers to the very same questions we had in the beginning. This is not some teen gaming site or a social site for the politically improper. It is a forum for information, research and support. If someone cannot put a sentence together that is supportive and/or constructive, either cut and paste one that fits the bill or stay silent.

muppie - My journey began over four years ago. Insurance was not my issue. Rather is was a bariatric surgical practice that was poorly run. The surgeon had the bedside manner of a rattlesnake and only one member of his staff had any sense or compassion. I had done everything on my side. Lost the weight, did the paperwork, went to all the appointments with NUTs, etc. I was getting my paperwork submitted for approval and I looked at my husband and said "Something is not right here. This is just not the atmosphere where I can thrive." He agreed. I decided to not to pursue the surgery with this doctor and walked away after all that work. I am a very thorough person. I finish what I started but I trusted my instincts. Fastforward - I am 2 1/2 months sleeved - down more than 60 lbs. I think my current surgeon is outstanding and his practice supportive. I have sleeve buddies in RL and online. To date I have met 8 other women who walked away from that program for the very same reasons. Make no mistake, I felt horrible even though I was the one that made the decision to leave. I felt like a miserable failure - because I was overweight and because I failed to take that step. But I kept pushing and this surgery with this surgeon is what will work long-term for me. Consider self-pay, different insurance, therapy during your 6 months, support groups or whatever it is to get you through this period. As said previously "You'll get there. Nothing good comes easy." Ain't that the truth! My best to you. One door closes - Two doors open. I hope your story is as happy as mine.

Gamergirl - First off, you're one of my favorite posters. The rest of my faves will have to live in suspense....as I will not reveal their identities (until I start drinking again..maybe?) This posting really shines a light on the pressures of rainmaking and how frustrating it can be for those people who need to hunt work, get in the door, work on the presentation, present, and then WAIT to hear if they made the cut. If you do get the work, there is the endless back and forth of client service based upon the whims of clients who lack strategic vision. A huge task in itself. When I had a stall in rainmaking, I would take an hour or two and step back to look at my business plan overall. I would analyze where my best money was coming in and that included an analysis of how much time/energy/money it took to generate that income. I know at one time, very similar to what you were experiencing, I actually dropped 5 % of my client because they were just not meeting my expectations financially - they were inefficient sources of income. After the analysis, I determined which clients I would like to attract and which of my current clients I wanted to get more business from to INCREASE my income. Why bother doing the analysis if I wasn't going to improve?! Stalls and uncertainty in business lead to improvements in efficiency and effectiveness. Find out what the other company did to get the work. My guess is..they had a contact. I lost out more work to connections than any other reason. I networked like crazy but there are just some contacts you can never make. If I lost the work for another reason, then I worked on improving that aspect of my business. OK...off the soapbox... What you are doing is tough work. I relate to the pains of being on the client service side of business. Keep at it. Stay tough. And just like the stall in your weight loss lifted, working on your business plan will result in more business coming in.... Better business I hope. tc

Diet Soda resulted in my being on the toilet (almost passing out) for an entire Friday night (BIG Mistake). However, what I can use is Sparkling Ice. http://www.sparklingice.com/ It is zero calories and lightly carbonated. The night prior I will usually just twist the cap to let some of the air out and then the next day I drink it. So lightly carbonated becomes REALLY lightly carbonated. Just a thought.

BRAVO!!! Keep up the good work Danielle. Makes me feel great when other are getting positive results.

Ladies - Only you can answer the ultimate question of whether this is right for you or not. Your surgeon can advise you on the risks of surgery. Weigh that factor heavily. There is a plethora of information on this site about the trials and tribulations of pre-op and post-op weight loss. While I certainly Celebrate individuality, I see many threads of commonalities in the postings here. Meaning... there are other people just like you. Look for them. You may even want to contact them. Ask what you are really worried about.... I was sleeved in June of this year. So most of us June sleevers are about 3 months out or a bit less. 99% of us are past the physical issues related to surgery and now dealing with stalls and avoiding old habits again. I would suggest reading the June 2013 sleevers trail of messages where you will see the good bad and ugly as about 100 people went through this process. In my humble opinion, the physical repercussions are relatively minor compared to the mental and emotional ones. Each of us has their our own set of challenges but there is a great deal of crossover. Build a strong network of people close to you in real life and perhaps a few key supporters online that really "get it" and "get you". This is not easy but either was being overweight with no hope in sight. 24+ years of just getting heavier, trying every diet, exercise plan, gaining after pregnancy - I am surprised I am still sane. "Did I try hard enough?" That is the self-sabotage question of a lifetime. I asked myself that long enough and was becoming my own worst enemy. Finally, for me, I just said to myself - "The results are in and these people with sleeves are really doing it. I just don't want to live like this anymore and I don't want even more problems when I age." There is a posting about the Straw that Broke the Camels back here. I would suggest you read those postings. VERY compelling statements about what brought people to this point. I suspect you will see yourself in a variety of those postings. "Did I try hard enough" can imply that this step is not a hard one. This process/journey is by no means easy. So I suspect when you're on the other side of surgery you will say "Damn right I have!!" Pat yourself on the back for figuring out that this is going to work for you and get ready to work with a tool that you have been looking for all of your life. I wish you both the best of luck in your continued journey. Feel free to reach out to me privately too. The best is yet to come.

Generous return policies from stores are to support those people who are returning clothes that have not been worn. They are designed to prevent a consumer from ending up with a product that is faulty or inappropriate. Aside from the ethical concerns of returning used clothing (aka "freestyling"), I would hazard a guess that certain states have criminal penalties for returning used clothing. Returning used clothing is a clear breach of the return policy. Your worn items have to be discarded by the store and that increase in cost for retailers results in increased prices for consumers. Or worse, one of us is stuck wearing your used clothing that we paid for at Sears.

AMAZING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

beauty29- This guy is a consummate jerk. I am so pleased that you found this out on date 1. Now you do not have to waste any more time with him. I firmly agree with the posters who think this guy is insecure. Clearly he was intimidated by you. Look forward to the land of opportunity. Tons of great fish in the sea who are going to love you at any size. Never let anyone, male or female, make you feel like anything less than who you are. tc

Amber09 - Hang in there! For me the first 4 days were bad and then it really started to improve remarkably every single day thereafter. We are all different but 99.9% of us get better quick. You will be in that demographic I am certain. Immediately after surgery, my strategy for success was to follow what the surgeon told me and to avoid people online or elsewhere that were constantly moaning about the food they could no longer eat. The "I MISS PIZZA" people. Just was a negative scene. Surround yourself with positive people - like these Buffalo survivors - and I think you will do fantastic. If you have healthcare questions, never hesitate to call your surgeon's office. It is really the best approach during these next few critical weeks. Juliansmommy is right on when she says get some rest. This is the time to focus on YOU. Don't lose sight of that...

Amber - You're ALIVE! Great work in there. Keep up the walking. When I was done in June I didn't see anyone else walking but I still did. MY husband and friends went with me. Very supportive. The next few days emotions can be up and down. Lay low. Relax. Listen to the cues from your body and get lots of rest between sipping from a small plastic cup. You are in full gear soon.

Any news on AmBer09?

See if your employer will let you borrow from your 401K

QCG - They ask for both psych records and medical records in case someone is treating for a psych condition with a more traditional medical practitioner rather than a counselor, psychologist or psychiatrist. If you do not have any records in your possession and signed a release, you are fine. They will get what they need with your release(if they need anything and I suspect they will not need anything). As for the redundant questions, someone who put that form together was likely being paid by the hour so they put together a less than straightforward LONG form. The criteria for this evaluation does not require the same paperwork as brain surgery - but you would never guess it from what these surgeons pass out. This evaluation will be straightforward. They will review the form and ask follow-up questions. You will have an opportunity to ask questions. The evaluation is very conversational and should not feel clinical. In the end, you'll be fine and may even feel more convinced to have the surgery. "See Previous Answer" is a legitimate and acceptable answer. It is less confusing and evidences that you actually understand the question being asked and do not want to be redundant with the medical professional who is reviewing the form. Best of luck at the appointment. Try not to overthink this part....this will be fine. I promise.

I just took a triple take at your photos! AMAZING and it is all due to you and your efforts. Congratulations on your continued efforts!! GREAT JOB!

Saying some special prayers for you Amber. I wish you all the best as you continue on this journey!!!! You're going to do so well with this!!!!

I have a friend who has been sleeved and she had the same pre-op medical challenges that you described. She GAINED 6 lbs on the liver reduction diet pre-op. I am pleased to report it is just past a year and she is down 100 lbs.

Sleeved June 27th and I have no regrets. 56 lbs down in 2 months and I have a ton of energy. I was on painkillers for 4 days post-op and the over the counter for one more day. I think the first 3 weeks were the biggest struggle and after week 7 I felt a new sense of "normal". Like any surgery, different people have different outcomes. Saying that, if you want to have a successful tool for your weightloss and you are prepared to listen to your surgical and healthcare team, this could be a true game changer. Some positives for me - little ones - more room in the car seat, pulling the slack on the airplane seatbelt, bending over with no effort, walking in heels up stairs and not feeling winded, walking up the stairs and my knees dont sound like rice krispies being stepped on, not having any issues with something in my closet being too small... and finally, I have so much more energy! I wish you the best on your journey. Never hesitate to message me directly with concerns.

I believe I was weighed a few days earlier at the pre-op hospital visit. I know I was not weighed on the date of surgery.

Same as Arts - My program says no coffee but I do drink it. Routinely I have the "half caf" or "split". Typically I do not drink the entire coffee. There is a Protein coffee called Clik that is really good and I do drink that every morning (I am an early riser) so you might want to consider ordering some sample packs of it. I know people who drink it and add flavored protein and froth it. I enjoy the vanilla Latte on its ow

During the pureed stage (and the liquid stage), you really are trying to keep your protein up (as indicated by Arts above). I followed the instructions of my surgeon/NUT but I do recall that they specified how many calories I should take in. I do remember I was getting about 600 to 800 calories per day during those two to three weeks. My shakes were anywhere from 125 to 160, made with skim milk or a ready to serve. When you go back for your follow-up, ask your surgeon what he/she recommends for your caloric intake from this point forward. Mine said I should be between 850 and 1000.