cal222

Thanks to all of you who replied. I agree it is a very personal issue. I am thinking as I get closer to setting a date things will fall into place and I will be able to make the best decision for me. The whole idea and process of wls is kind of frightening on one hand and exciting on the other. I guess I need to process all of the information that I have been reading and try and relax about it!

I have just joined this site and I am seriously thinking about getting the sleeve. The only person I have told is my husband..I am afraid to tell my family and friends for a number of reasons. First, I am embarassed that I have not been able to keep weight off on my own. I also don't want to hear all the negative comments or be judged. Has anyone had similar fears? What did you do? Need advice.

I personally chose to tell a small group of people (mostly family and friends) whom I thought would be supportive. Oddly enough, a few people were very judgmental and were very rude with things they said about my decision. I was quite shocked. I no longer discuss this surgery with them and at times wish I would have kept it to myself. I wish you luck in your journey! I feel like VSG is the right choice for me.
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I'm in the middle of my 6 month medically supervised diet. I totally understand how you are feeling. I have told my hubs, my mom, children and a select few others. I'm not telling my sisters, even though I KNOW they will support me, but, I'm afraid they will have unrealistic expectations and that will get me down. I'm also not telling my in laws. I feel they will judge me. Think I'm lazy or wanting "the easy way out". Tell only who you want! It's YOUR choice! You need a good support system.

I know how you feel! I've only told a handful of people because I don't want comments, rude remarks, or opinions. I've told my aunt, parents, and husband. That's it. My insurance is so crazy I have to jump through hoops before I can have surgery, so I don't want to tell everyone in case something were to happen and I'm not able to have surgery. Plus, it's embarrassing for me. I feel like such a failure and I'm having to destroy my body just to be "normal."

Welcome! I have only told my husband and children (they are young adults). Other family members would disagree with my decision and try to talk me out of it. I actually work in a surgery area where this surgery is done often and last year I mentioned I was thinking about it and I got bombarded with negative comments. I never brought it up again. After the new year I dropped my insurance so I only have my husbands coverage... Taking 1 1/2 weeks vacation time starting this Friday the 12th... My surgery date... at at different hospital, of course!!

I don't know that I had fears of people finding out.. And I think if you want to keep it private that's fine, but please don't be embarrassed about not being able to keep it off. You at not a bad person because you have a weight issues. .

I was worried about comments as well.. My wife knew my plans all along and was super supportive. I told my step father, and he wasn't overly excited, but I explained my reasoning and he came around. I then told my mom and she asked questions but has been so supportive. I mentioned it to my sister at christmas and my middle brother knew since the summer.
I didn't tell anyone else until the sunday before my surgery. That's when I told my father, step mother and youngest brother (I wasn't going to even tell them but they invited us over for St. Pats dinner so I had to explain why I wasn't able to eat the food and would be just having salad)
I am sure that my father had a bunch of things to say, but he didn't say them to my face.. That's kind of the way that family works though.. Everything is said to others not the person they are talking about.. Kinda frustrating.
Friends and extended family didn't know until after the surgery when my wife posted from the hospital.. Then I made her call my grandmother ASAP to let her know what was going on.. I just didn't want her to worry and I was going to let her know when I was better.
It's a personal choice.. I would let those know who you feel you will need support from, but it's really nobodies business but yours.

I have just joined this site and I am seriously thinking about getting the sleeve. The only person I have told is my husband..I am afraid to tell my family and friends for a number of reasons. First, I am embarassed that I have not been able to keep weight off on my own. I also don't want to hear all the negative comments or be judged. Has anyone had similar fears? What did you do? Need advice.

I have just joined this site and I am seriously thinking about getting the sleeve. The only person I have told is my husband..I am afraid to tell my family and friends for a number of reasons. First, I am embarassed that I have not been able to keep weight off on my own. I also don't want to hear all the negative comments or be judged. Has anyone had similar fears? What did you do? Need advice.