So my adventure began at the end of July when after researching for several months, I decided it was time. On August 29th I saw the surgeon. The entire process to get insurance approval was pretty easy and I had no problems or setbacks. I was approved on November 5th, and could've had surgery the following Friday, but decided to wait until my work closed for xmas break. I was finally sleeved on 12/19/12 and everything went well. I didn't need any pain meds following surgery and haven't had any trouble with drinking as of yet. The biggest thing I've noticed is that I nap ALOT. I am working on getting my liquids in, so far I am up to 55g. of protein and close to 20 oz. of water, tea, etc. I can tell I'm full when I get a spasm type pain in my sternum or I start to burp...so I stop and wait. I get to start yogurt, eggs, cream of wheat and soups w/o chunks on 12/26, but I will start a day early as my mom-in-law made her famous potato soup just for me for xmas, and I will eat a little of it. I will see how my new tummy handles that....hopefully well. I'd really hate to get sick at her place because I know she'd feel bad. As for exercise, it's been pretty windy and cold here, so I've been doing laps in the house often and am hoping to get outside to walk soon. So far, I feel pretty lucky. Hoping it will stay this smooth during the food transitions.
earlier today i was browsing on here and a girl who says she has bcbs of alabama approved her in 3 days. well i have the same insurance. so today around 11ish i got really nervous. like it literally hit me outta nowhere. the what if's set in. i was like omg what if i get denied, i will be mad as hell. BUT around 230ish my surgeon called and said Angel guess what? i said they denied me?! he said oh no they approved you! you were a perfect candidate there was no reason for them to deny you. now lets set a date
it was only one day! i thought i was gonna have to wait forever since its close to the holidays. but it only took ONE DAY. im so happy and so grateful that i can live my life feeling good about myself! thank you jesus! so my date is set for january 14th 2013. im soooo excited! losers bench here i come! if i could do a back flip, cartwheel i would! ha! one of these days i WILL be able to!
Things are getting to crunch time and I have some major issues that have definitely been relived. First and foremost, I was afraid to have a drainage tube and catheter. I was able to ask my surgeon about this directly and he assured me I won't have either. He went on to explain that usually the tubes are for patients with much higher BMIs for safety reasons. Thank goodness. I am now at the home stretch. I know I am going to be kicking screaming on my way in there but dammit I'm going in there in less than 48 hours and I'm coming out a new woman. Pray for me everyone!
It’s day seven of my liquid diet, and today was the first time I really struggled.
First, let me say that today was a great day in many respects. My husband and I took our oldest on a college visit today where he and other students auditioned and interviewed for theater scholarships. I’m not just saying this because I’m his mom—my son did great! Some of the professors even told me so afterwards. He had such a great experience today (this was our second visit), that he decided to commit to the school, which is a huge load off of all of our minds. My son really shined today, and I’m excited about this new chapter in his life. He's going to do amazing things!
Okay, now here’s the crabby part. This, as many of you already know, is just a really hard time of year to be on a liquid diet. (Though I'm sure every time of the year has its own unique challenges.) While on campus today, we were treated to lunch in a recently updated dining hall that truly is more like a collection of restaurants. It puts my old college’s microwave eggs and frozen pizzas to shame! And it was a social lunch, one that was stretched out for an hour so that we could talk to the faculty and visit with other prospective students. I felt a little self-conscious about my tiny bowl of soup (which probably wasn’t even technically on my list) as people went back for seconds. Then, we were enthusiastically encouraged to hit the icecream bar. I got another diet soda—a no-no, I know, but at least it wasn’t the icecream bar, and it made me feel like I was having a treat.
After a very long two hour drive, we got back into town right around supper time and stopped to pick up my two younger kids from my mom’s house. When we got there, my kids showed off the frosted Christmas sugar cookies they made and everyone endulged—except me. Now, I can see this as a small victory, and I do, but I felt bad because my 3 year old daughter didn’t entirely understand why I wasn’t eating her special cookies. And I felt like my mom was disappointed in me too. Maybe it was in my head, but she kept looking at me like, “Come on, Jennie, just eat one, for your kids.” Then Mom continued to talk about how excited that she was that her favorite pizza place was moving back into our neighborhood. I got out of there as quickly as I could.
As soon as I got home, my phone was ringing. My little sis, who lives 3 hours away, is hosting a girls weekend at her place this weekend. It’s the first time she’s had many of the girls of the family down to visit since she moved there, and she’s especially excited because she has a beautiful new home and it’s all decked out for the holidays. Plus, she’s newly pregnant. If you haven’t noticed already—backing out of the trip is simply not a possibility. She is really supportive of what I’m doing, but in her defense, she’s been planning this weekend for a while, and certainly not just for me. So on the agenda for the weekend: a winery (and I LOVE wine—it’s kinda my thing), a local festival of fresh baked goods and Christmas crafts (the crafts should be cool), and then out on the town for dinner in Kansas City. Sigh. This is going to be a tough week, I can tell.
But, here it is: I have 7 days left, and A LOT to do. I have to get sub plans ready for the 9 days I’ll miss work, and I pretty much need to have Christmas shopping and wrapping done before I leave town Friday. I teach a college night class, and the grades for that are due next week, and I have to take my student group out to buy gifts for ten area needy kids that we “adopted” for Christmas. I’m hoping that I’m so busy, I won’t have time to lament the loss of real food. Though this weekend will be tough. I’ll just have to keep focused on my surgery. It will be here before I know it.
Writing this all down has really helped me get my head around where I am emotionally today. Maybe I wanted to eat more today because, even though it’s a really wonderful milestone, there’s something very bittersweet in my son’s final selection of a college. This is exactly the kind of thing that I would have celebrated by going out for a nice, high calorie dinner! And maybe it’s bothering me that I don’t feel as supported by my extended family as I wish I was. But on the other hand, I’m never going to change them, and I love them how they are. I’m sure I drive them nuts from time to time. And my husband has been amazing. He’s passing on food all the time just so that he’s not eating in front of me. He is even making all of the dinners for the kids right now, which allows me to make my shake/soup/yogurt/whatever and go sit and unwind a minute alone at the end of the day. So I have a lot to stay positive about—I’ve having the surgery, afterall. I’m only days away from something I’ve wanted for almost two years. So I just need to stay positive.
Stay positive.
