I forgot who said it in someone elses post about how their friend was being unsupportive and rude, but in not so much reference to that; you're losing the pounds so why not lose the people/situations that aren't supporting that positive thing in your life?
Not suggesting you should get a divorce, but LET HIM KNOW that his unsupportive behavior is not cool and that he should try to be more understanding of where you are coming from instead of being such a jerk about the whole situation. Tell him you don't have room for all that negativity!
This is a really sticky situation. At the end of the day, the patient has responsibility to pay for any services rendered - so first, do not accept insufficient explanations from your insurance company. You need to understand exactly what happened, and why. Often things like this happen because there's an employer-enforced exclusion that is either missed, or wasn't in the system at the time of pre-approval. Either way, you need to spend some serious time on the phone with your insurance company and find out EXACTLY what happened: is it an approved procedure, do you have any type of exclusion (as your HR dept too), when was the exclusion put in force, etc. DO not accept anything less than exactly the info you're looking for. If necessary, have a conference call between you, your surgeon's coordinator, and a manager at your ins. co. I've had to do that a few times for myself, and helped several people through the process. Don't be timid, shy, or back down. You have a right to understand what happened.
Even if pre-approved, there is no guarantee of payment. I don't want to be a bubble burster, but I'm already seeing a lot of people saying "it was preapproved so they have to pay" (or thereabouts). That's just not the case. That little disclaimer in bold is on virtually every phone queue waiting message, piece of paper you get, etc. from every medical insurance provider out there. Does that make it right? No. And it's not really intended for situations like this, but it's a pesky little loophole. That's how they get out of paying for mistakes like these. (Insurance companies can also go back and "change their minds" on something paid, and revert it to a blance owed... IIRC they can do this for up to 2 years.)
I would also speak to your surgeon. Those billings amounts are what they bill insurance companies retail, which is a GROSSLY inflated amount over what they usually charge self pay patients, and is NEVER the amount the insurance company actually pays. If nothing else, perhaps your surgeon's office can revert the bill to self-pay rates. Example:
Insurance company charged $57,000.
Insurance company pays $8450 (total of "contract" or negotiated plan rates)
Self pay rate: $12,300.
Feel free to PM me if you need more help. I have a lot of background in the insurance industry, and have been able to give people some advice that actually helps on occasion.
You are suffering the same reactions that some addicts suffer from. This is a reason we get this surgery. Without a smaller stomach, you would be overeating, feeling guilty about it, getting more depressed and then overeating again because of the pleasure you get from eating to combat the depression. It's an endless spiril we all have been through. Once you have had the surgery, this tool we have been given helps us through this period. Its normal. Your brain is focusing on the withdrawl. All you can do is recognize this and realize that this too shall pass. Stalls are normal and expected. Reward yourself occassionally for what you do, although not with food as you might have done in the past. Go do something for yourself.
