Estrellita

I've been posting several questions regarding weird sensations that freak me out. The night before last I awoke to a sensation of heat that traveled from my stomach to my chest area to my left arm. I freaked out and thought I was having a heart attack. It slowly went away, but yesterday almost all day I had a racing heart and the left arm tingling feeling didn't subside. I called my nurse and she returned my call around 6 PM. Our conversation was very enlightening.
She went through several procedural questions trying to learn if it was leakage, or my fears: heart attack, body paralysis (I know I'm hysterical). Thank God, it's not symptoms for any of these. I'm tolerating liquids and soft foods, Protein drink, and my Vitamins. I have no pain, no nausea, no vomiting, no dizziness, and my lightheadedness is virtually gone. These are great news! So what's causing my accelerated heart, heat sensations, and left arm tingling? ANXIETY!
Before surgery I had mild depression, only during PMS days, but never anxiety. This is new to me. The nurse explained that after surgery there is rise in hormone levels, including estrogen (as some of you who responded to my questions also suggested). This rise in hormones could lead to depression and/or anxiety. I knew she was right because I've been an emotional wreck. Any new physical sensation, as normal as it is to bariatric surgery, freaks me out. I think I'm gonna die and I spiral downward from that thought. I've gone as far as telling my 16 year to be strong in case I die, and I've delivered to my family my last wishes and instructions on caring for my girls. I've cried like I don't remember crying before, and I'm experiencing emotions and thoughts I don't remember having had before. All this is creating anxiety, and anxiety is manifesting itself in physical symptoms. It's the cause for my racing heart, heat sensations, and tingling feelings. I now know it is. I never believed anxiety to be so powerful.
After getting off the phone with the nurse I decided to move back into my mom's house for two more weeks. I don't want to be alone at home, frightening my kids and husband. At mom's I have the perfect support system. My oldest sister practices meditation, my other sister is great at rationalizing, which subside my fears, my youngest sister is awesome with my 8 year old, and my mother makes sure I take naps and makes the best vegetable Soups. I stayed there a week and a half after surgery, but then left home. I'm back and so are my sisters (mom is delighted!).
Yesterday I meditated, had a good cry, talked long with my family, and went to bed early. In bed I practiced breathing excercises, and tried hard to not dwell on fears. I slept good and today haven't experienced the heat, acceleration, or tingleness. I'm hopeful again.
Those of you pre-ops, you need a support system. I expected to be pain free, on my feet, ready to go three weeks after surgery. Yes I'm pain free, on my feet, but I'm not really ready to go. I tire easy, and above all, I'm struggling emotionaly. This was soooo unexpected, but I'm taking the challenge.
Something else the nurse recommeded that I'm following through on is to stop reading horror bariatric stories online. I've read horrendous stories, that I'm sorry to hear about, and do terrify me, but now is not the time to delve into them. I should've done that before surgery, not now, especially not now. That was adding to my anxiety. So I don't recommned any post-ops to do so. This is the only site I'm sticking to, and it's all I need.
Don't underestimate the power of anxiety. It will cause physical symptoms, some scary and very concerning. Contact your dr, even if you're sure it's anxiety, just to make sure. My nurse told me to get my heart checked, and I will. But, calm down. Practice a relaxation method, do breating excersices, and reach out. I continue to have mixed emotions about my decision to get surgery, and I'm still nervous about my future life and health. But, I'm trying to be my old optimistic self and believe that all will be fine.

I've been posting several questions regarding weird sensations that freak me out. The night before last I awoke to a sensation of heat that traveled from my stomach to my chest area to my left arm. I freaked out and thought I was having a heart attack. It slowly went away, but yesterday almost all day I had a racing heart and the left arm tingling feeling didn't subside. I called my nurse and she returned my call around 6 PM. Our conversation was very enlightening.
She went through several procedural questions trying to learn if it was leakage, or my fears: heart attack, body paralysis (I know I'm hysterical). Thank God, it's not symptoms for any of these. I'm tolerating liquids and soft foods, Protein drink, and my Vitamins. I have no pain, no nausea, no vomiting, no dizziness, and my lightheadedness is virtually gone. These are great news! So what's causing my accelerated heart, heat sensations, and left arm tingling? ANXIETY!
Before surgery I had mild depression, only during PMS days, but never anxiety. This is new to me. The nurse explained that after surgery there is rise in hormone levels, including estrogen (as some of you who responded to my questions also suggested). This rise in hormones could lead to depression and/or anxiety. I knew she was right because I've been an emotional wreck. Any new physical sensation, as normal as it is to bariatric surgery, freaks me out. I think I'm gonna die and I spiral downward from that thought. I've gone as far as telling my 16 year to be strong in case I die, and I've delivered to my family my last wishes and instructions on caring for my girls. I've cried like I don't remember crying before, and I'm experiencing emotions and thoughts I don't remember having had before. All this is creating anxiety, and anxiety is manifesting itself in physical symptoms. It's the cause for my racing heart, heat sensations, and tingling feelings. I now know it is. I never believed anxiety to be so powerful.
After getting off the phone with the nurse I decided to move back into my mom's house for two more weeks. I don't want to be alone at home, frightening my kids and husband. At mom's I have the perfect support system. My oldest sister practices meditation, my other sister is great at rationalizing, which subside my fears, my youngest sister is awesome with my 8 year old, and my mother makes sure I take naps and makes the best vegetable Soups. I stayed there a week and a half after surgery, but then left home. I'm back and so are my sisters (mom is delighted!).
Yesterday I meditated, had a good cry, talked long with my family, and went to bed early. In bed I practiced breathing excercises, and tried hard to not dwell on fears. I slept good and today haven't experienced the heat, acceleration, or tingleness. I'm hopeful again.
Those of you pre-ops, you need a support system. I expected to be pain free, on my feet, ready to go three weeks after surgery. Yes I'm pain free, on my feet, but I'm not really ready to go. I tire easy, and above all, I'm struggling emotionaly. This was soooo unexpected, but I'm taking the challenge.
Something else the nurse recommeded that I'm following through on is to stop reading horror bariatric stories online. I've read horrendous stories, that I'm sorry to hear about, and do terrify me, but now is not the time to delve into them. I should've done that before surgery, not now, especially not now. That was adding to my anxiety. So I don't recommned any post-ops to do so. This is the only site I'm sticking to, and it's all I need.
Don't underestimate the power of anxiety. It will cause physical symptoms, some scary and very concerning. Contact your dr, even if you're sure it's anxiety, just to make sure. My nurse told me to get my heart checked, and I will. But, calm down. Practice a relaxation method, do breating excersices, and reach out. I continue to have mixed emotions about my decision to get surgery, and I'm still nervous about my future life and health. But, I'm trying to be my old optimistic self and believe that all will be fine.

I think this thread goes on this forum, not wher I posted before...
Hi all! Tomorrow marks my fourth month post surgery. What has this journey been like? Well...
1. No leakage or any other serious complication- thank God!
2. I never expected the post surgery experience I had. Anxiety and depression, like I've never witnessed in myself or anyone else. kicked in about two weeks post. Uncontrollable, snowballing, unexplainable, irrational fear, sadness, and regret. I went on tranquilizers, developed a mild dependecy on the benzo, had to follow a tapering process, but all ended well. This experience is unforgettable to me and my family! Everyone entering this surgery process should be aware that this is a possible reaction to surgery. I'm not sure if only to this type of surgery, or all. The more the time passes, the more I see posts that relate to my experience. So far I've contacted six people with less, exact, or worse anxiety and depression after the sleeve. Be aware of this possibility. Know that it can debiliate you, thus you need a safety net. However, also be aware that it passes. Thank God, all that is in the past. But the experience I don't think I will ever forget.
3. Because of #2, an improved appreciation for God, life and for all my loved ones.
4. Weight loss: forty pounds down- yay!
5. Besides #2, the most impacting part of this experience is accepting the fact that the surgery did not rid my addiction to food, nor my unhealthy eating habits. I completed a mandated five month program before surgery. The instructor endlessly stressed to start working on our eating patterns and habits before surgery, to ease the transition and have more success with the procedure. As much as this was emphasized, I didn't do it. It was also emphasized that the surgery didn't cure our addiction and relationships to food, this too I ignored. To me, surgery would cure my addiction to food, would for ever change my eating patterns, and never again would I experience the vicious cycle of binging, guilt, shame, weight gain, etc. etc. etc. In my mind I figured I'd be forced to change because my body wouldn't tolerate overeating. I ached for a change, and surgery would force the change on me....problem solved! I awaited surgery with glee and faith. Well, the story goes otherwise.
I have changed some of my eating patterns and you will find plenty healthy veggies and fruits, plus lean meats in my fridge. I joined the gym for the first time in my life, and through therapy am trying to sort out my relationship with food.
However, surgery hasn't forced a change on me. You know those stories of having to induce vomit (or it naturally occuring) due to overeating? NEVER happens to me, NEVER! I cannot eat as much as before, but defenitley more than I expected. I can eat a full cup of spaghetti with cheese and sour cream in one sitting. I'll finish it, feel full, and stop eating. But thirty minutes later my pouch has made room, and I can take some more in. This especially happens when I eat out and we usually sit around chatting for a while. Time passes and I'll start nibling at my food again. I can eat about half a cup more--without being hungry. Why do I do it? I'm working on understanding it.
Those stories of no longer tolerating fatty, sugary, lactose, or other foods- not I. I can eat EVERYTHING AND ANYTHING.
Dumping syndrome? I don't even know what that is.
Having to chew food to mushy consistency- not I. I chew, but never to the consistency I thought I'd have to.
Taste buds change post surgery- not mine. Not one of the billions of taste buds have changed- at all!
Bottom line, this surgery didn't force any change on me. I have gone up and down in weight, and can't seem to break the 40 pounds mark. It's been this way for the past five weeks. I still experience the disappointment in myself over food choices and behavior. The shame and guilt sneak up, and soon I'm angry and feel defeated. All the emotions, habits, and challenges I faced with food and weight pre surgery I face now too. I thought I'd be facing these issues two years after surgery when my pouch has relaxed and expanded a bit, and many regain the weight. I thought that by that time my life would be extraordinarily wonderful- that I'd never regain the weight and give up my success and joy. Well, it's only been four months and I'm facing reality already. Everyone considering surgery needs to know this. I think those who've had success with the sleeve have had it because they've made changes that have yielded the success. The sleeve itself will not yield it. Maybe everyone already knows this, but I have been known to be a late bloomer.
Do I regret having had surgery? Honestly, there is nothing to regret. I had (and pray that it continues) zero complications, I still enjoy food, have a very active social life, have gone down a size in clothes, and experience no pain, vomit, nausea, or anything of the sort. I feel blessed that my surgery has gone so smooth, pain free, and complication free. I pray that it continues to do so. I prefer to deal with my current issues, than any physical complication.
There really is nothing to regret. On the contrary, I believe this surgery has a higher purpose in my life. It isn't yielding the weight success I imagined, but it is forcing me to look deep into myself and work with what is out of balance. I can't run away from it anymore. I refuse to have gone through this experience and continue on the road of addiction, caught in that endless dark cycle. This is the change my sleeve had brought to my life. My progress comes in baby steps, but I'll get there.
God bless you all!

I think this thread goes on this forum, not wher I posted before...
Hi all! Tomorrow marks my fourth month post surgery. What has this journey been like? Well...
1. No leakage or any other serious complication- thank God!
2. I never expected the post surgery experience I had. Anxiety and depression, like I've never witnessed in myself or anyone else. kicked in about two weeks post. Uncontrollable, snowballing, unexplainable, irrational fear, sadness, and regret. I went on tranquilizers, developed a mild dependecy on the benzo, had to follow a tapering process, but all ended well. This experience is unforgettable to me and my family! Everyone entering this surgery process should be aware that this is a possible reaction to surgery. I'm not sure if only to this type of surgery, or all. The more the time passes, the more I see posts that relate to my experience. So far I've contacted six people with less, exact, or worse anxiety and depression after the sleeve. Be aware of this possibility. Know that it can debiliate you, thus you need a safety net. However, also be aware that it passes. Thank God, all that is in the past. But the experience I don't think I will ever forget.
3. Because of #2, an improved appreciation for God, life and for all my loved ones.
4. Weight loss: forty pounds down- yay!
5. Besides #2, the most impacting part of this experience is accepting the fact that the surgery did not rid my addiction to food, nor my unhealthy eating habits. I completed a mandated five month program before surgery. The instructor endlessly stressed to start working on our eating patterns and habits before surgery, to ease the transition and have more success with the procedure. As much as this was emphasized, I didn't do it. It was also emphasized that the surgery didn't cure our addiction and relationships to food, this too I ignored. To me, surgery would cure my addiction to food, would for ever change my eating patterns, and never again would I experience the vicious cycle of binging, guilt, shame, weight gain, etc. etc. etc. In my mind I figured I'd be forced to change because my body wouldn't tolerate overeating. I ached for a change, and surgery would force the change on me....problem solved! I awaited surgery with glee and faith. Well, the story goes otherwise.
I have changed some of my eating patterns and you will find plenty healthy veggies and fruits, plus lean meats in my fridge. I joined the gym for the first time in my life, and through therapy am trying to sort out my relationship with food.
However, surgery hasn't forced a change on me. You know those stories of having to induce vomit (or it naturally occuring) due to overeating? NEVER happens to me, NEVER! I cannot eat as much as before, but defenitley more than I expected. I can eat a full cup of spaghetti with cheese and sour cream in one sitting. I'll finish it, feel full, and stop eating. But thirty minutes later my pouch has made room, and I can take some more in. This especially happens when I eat out and we usually sit around chatting for a while. Time passes and I'll start nibling at my food again. I can eat about half a cup more--without being hungry. Why do I do it? I'm working on understanding it.
Those stories of no longer tolerating fatty, sugary, lactose, or other foods- not I. I can eat EVERYTHING AND ANYTHING.
Dumping syndrome? I don't even know what that is.
Having to chew food to mushy consistency- not I. I chew, but never to the consistency I thought I'd have to.
Taste buds change post surgery- not mine. Not one of the billions of taste buds have changed- at all!
Bottom line, this surgery didn't force any change on me. I have gone up and down in weight, and can't seem to break the 40 pounds mark. It's been this way for the past five weeks. I still experience the disappointment in myself over food choices and behavior. The shame and guilt sneak up, and soon I'm angry and feel defeated. All the emotions, habits, and challenges I faced with food and weight pre surgery I face now too. I thought I'd be facing these issues two years after surgery when my pouch has relaxed and expanded a bit, and many regain the weight. I thought that by that time my life would be extraordinarily wonderful- that I'd never regain the weight and give up my success and joy. Well, it's only been four months and I'm facing reality already. Everyone considering surgery needs to know this. I think those who've had success with the sleeve have had it because they've made changes that have yielded the success. The sleeve itself will not yield it. Maybe everyone already knows this, but I have been known to be a late bloomer.
Do I regret having had surgery? Honestly, there is nothing to regret. I had (and pray that it continues) zero complications, I still enjoy food, have a very active social life, have gone down a size in clothes, and experience no pain, vomit, nausea, or anything of the sort. I feel blessed that my surgery has gone so smooth, pain free, and complication free. I pray that it continues to do so. I prefer to deal with my current issues, than any physical complication.
There really is nothing to regret. On the contrary, I believe this surgery has a higher purpose in my life. It isn't yielding the weight success I imagined, but it is forcing me to look deep into myself and work with what is out of balance. I can't run away from it anymore. I refuse to have gone through this experience and continue on the road of addiction, caught in that endless dark cycle. This is the change my sleeve had brought to my life. My progress comes in baby steps, but I'll get there.
God bless you all!

I'm so sorry to hear your experience. Recently I came across a website for people who've had bariatric surgeries: Weight Loss Surgeries Federation of America. If you enter their site you'll see that they offer grants for surgeries. I have no clue what the qualifications are, or anything that has to do with the process. I came across it post surgery and have explored other forums on the site, but have never clicked on the grants link. Look into it and don't lose hope. God bless you!

Hi Pam!
I know exactly what you're experiencing. Three weeks post op I was still experiencing pain, dizziness, lightheadedness, Constipation, depression, and had serious mixed emotions about my surgery. I too believed I had researched enough, plus I completed a 5 month prep program my insurance demanded. Yet, even five weeks later I was regretting my surgery and was resentful at my family for "allowing" me to do it. How irrational was that!!
Hang in there. I will soon be three months post-op, and boy did things get better!!! No more lightheadedness, dizziness, constipation, depression/anxiety, fatigue, or pain. I can drink and eat enough to feel strong and 100% normal. Things will get better. Relax, pray, meditate, read, talk to people (positive people), walk, journal, breathing exercises, listen to music, etc. This is what got me through, and it will help you too. Make sure you're taking in liquids, your Vitamins, and as much Protein as possible or your fatigue may persist. But don't stress. Relax.
God bless you. All WILL get better!